You’re absolutely doing the right thing, run for the hills as fast as you can from this man child
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I wouldn’t stay in that relationship, if he expects you to cook and clean for him and your not even sharing a home together imagine how bad it will be once you do
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You have done the right thing.
This is a “clash of needs”
-YOU want a partner who is independent and who can put in 50% and wont listen to sexist, whiny mother in laws.
-he wants a partner who can handle mommy issues and do most of the work.
These needs cannot be met as is. One of you is going to have to compromise.
Honestly if he doesnt see how weird it is to expect a partner who doesnt live in household to do the cooking and cleaning and doesnt express how unrealistic that is to his mother- I would run.
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You sound very upset. He needs to take your relationship seriously. Please remember oh, that his mom will always be a part of his life.
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Hahaha wow that’s a bit much for a mother to want her to so help her buy a house. He needs to have his own life.
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Does mom have a issue where needs to live with someone? Im all for family. And if my mom were alone I would want to help her. I wonder if maybe shes suggesting when he stays with you that you should be doing those things?? To me… This isnt 1950. Women work out of home now days. Gender roles aren’t the same. Need to really talk about if thats how HE sees it and not just his mothers view.
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BE VERY AWARE that habits started at the beginning of a relationship are very difficult to change down the road. Keep your boundaries very strong and make sure your intentions are in alignment before you commit to anything. The mother situation is very suspect.
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No. You’re his gf, not his mom. Even then, he’s a grown man. Why does he need someone to cook and clean for him? Sounds like he needs to grow up.
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You haven’t been together long enough for him to pick you over his mother…. So while you are not wrong for setting boundaries… you should expect to lose him. Sorry.
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so can’t you guys use your place for privacy? and yeah you shouldn’t cook and clean in a house you dont live at or pay for.
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It’s only been a few months.I agree with your mindset. You are not his wife, it’s not his mothers job even if you were to make comments about you cooking and cleaning for him. You’re not his wife or his mother. He is a grown man and can/should be cleaning and cooking for himself. Ending the relationship at this stage and as early as it is would be my move as well. Especially since it’s still early and this problem has already come to light. If it quacks like a duck and walks like a duck. Don’t think it will go away at any point. If mom is already commenting now it will only get worse or about other wife level things.
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Sounds to me like you got a bonified mommas boy your hands. And mama tested just how committed you are to her son by telling the son you need to cook and clean for him.
I must be the only guy on this page lol, but my advice is you need to end it with mamas boy and find a real man. The day my mother thought she had say in my marriage I told her exactly where to go. When a guy is serious about a woman he doesn’t need to be told anything from an outsiders perspective. Tell this guy he can go live with his mother again lol. Doesn’t sound like too much of a loss to be honest.
Your next income could be on that popular TV show on whatever channel it is. You might want to watch it. I’m sure those girls were deciding what to do at one time.
Sounds like he’s already married to his mom. Girl too many red flags! You may be emotionally attached but you need to find yourself first. And if there are any arguments that you fear the mother might hear then should those arguments even be taking place? Having children in a relationship like that will only make things worse and end in divorce or abuse. You’re a student and you work yet he doesn’t pay bills. How do you think it’d be when you’re married? A constant you worked before why not now? You end up doing everything! Don’t fall for it girl ! You can find better!
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Speaking as a mother-in-law I would never get in my children’s love life whether they’ve been dating one month or 5 years not my business they’re grown ass adults.
My advice is simple…RUN. Do not look back. Do not pass go. RUN.
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No!! Are you his girlfriend or his freakin maid?? You wanna pick up or straighten when there fine, but you have to want to not have to…
Ace Metaphor just made a video about this not to long ago go check his page out I can’t remember the title but it’s like wife things for boyfriends or something 
Great she didn’t teach her son to cook or clean 
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It’s been a few months. Get out now!
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He’s a big boy he can cook and clean himself
sounds like he would choose momma’s word over yours all day long… and mom sounds toxic… best to walk away …
Stay away from mommas boys. I dealt with one. Glad I saw it before I was to marry him. I found a very good man after a few years.
He I’d just making excuses not to commit.
He is a mommy boy. I’ll call NEXT!!!
Nah follow through what you said, cause it’s only gonna get worse down the line with that
… 1, you guys don’t live together therefore you don’t need to clean his goddamn house for it, 2 cooking for him while you are there isn’t so bad but he shouldn’t expect it all the time 3 if you guys live together, y’all go split the chores and cooking (that’s what me and my bf do cause I ain’t nobody’s damn maid and he’s more than capable of helping) 4 … I wouldn’t wanna move into a house with him and his parent, like I love my privacy within my own home and I wouldn’t wanna move back in with any parent unless I have absolutely no choice 
You’ve been dating the guy a few months according to what you said. MONTHS! You don’t live together, and it sounds like you see each other when you can. How does the “cooking and cleaning” for him even come into play? No need to be moving in with him and his mother. Let him stay with his mommy and you find yourself someone else. He doesn’t even sound mature enough for a serious relationship.
Take it from someone who actually lives in the situation you are being forced to accept Do Not live with your in law . Where as my spouse loves his mother deeply, since moving her in the whole situation at times is a nightmare. I can go into detail but I won’t. You are right you will loose privacy… then having a kid is a new nightmare, if she is bossy and demanding now just wait til she is screaming her head off at a kid and you want to become physically violent to stop it. Just run she seems like a monster in law and will ruin everything you dream of having.
Are you freaking kidding me? Oh I feel upset and angry for you just reading your post. I agree with you that this is not your responsibility. It is ludicrous that something like that would even be suggested. He is a spoiled brat and his mother will be the mother in law from hell. You won’t be able to have a normal life because even if you got married, there would be so much criticism over how happy he is and what he tells his mom about how you take care of him, and the house etc. And God forbid you have children. Lordy. I don’t mean to sound harsh. This reminds me of a relationship that I was in at one time. It was so difficult and I always felt overwhelmed and a sense of dread.
I’d be strongly reconsidering the relationship. This would will not end well. Been there, done that.
Girl, just run… that sounds like a nightmare waiting to happen.
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Good for you. He will always put her first. It’s good a man loves his mother but your partner should come first. Dodge that bullet now.
Your not wrong! He moves in with his mom then you should just move on! No you don’t to cook and clean for someone you don’t live with, don’t share bills with or aren’t engaged and planning a wedding. If he wants a cook/housekeeper then he or his mom can hire one!! Neither gets those benefits from a single woman that he’s not committed to. Sounds like mom needs to be reigned in or just DROP the both of them!!!
Run! Run fast! This guy’s has serious issues with his mother and you will suffer for them the rest of your life. You aren’t up for the position of his new mommy…
You guys have only been dating a couple of months. You have no business telling him what he can or can’t do with his life as you said you are not his wife so he is not your husband. If he wants to move in with his mom and help her you have no business saying no. When I was in a relationship with men we weren’t living together and they weren’t paying my bills I would cook for them, or we’d cook together, and I’d clean and do their laundry for them when I was there. Because I loved them and cared about them.
Jessica Dennett you said it !!! Go !!!
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Agree with you 100%!
Run away from that mess!
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Let him go back to mommy
Sounds like enmeshment. Run.
No you are not wrong.
leave while you can