Put her in her place, period!
Your brother should be so proud he spent the time helping his Mom. He should cherish all those memories. Shame on the others
Sorry for your loss and absolutely call them out, but Iād wait till itās brought up by one of them!
Call her the eff out. She could have taken a turn helping your mom. Your brother is amazing. I mean donāt call her out right now, but when the time is right let her know. Iām so sorry for your loss and that your brother and dad are also sick right now. It sounds like a really tough time. Your brother did a good thing, please let him know. Maybe he should cut your sister off if sheās going to bad mouth. Care giving is not easy. He sacrificed having his own life to take care of his mother. Not a lot of people do that.
Put them in their place! Went through similar and itās bs. Defend him, he put her needs ahead of his own kudos to him!
YES! Call them all out. Ask what THEY did for your mom! He needs you to stand up for him. Help him through this. When you center your life around caring for someone, and they die - life seems purposeless for a while. Bless his heart. 
Yes call her TF out, I have a sister JUST like that. I worked for years, pregnant with severe health issues all the way up to my due date dragging my butt to work. I stopped working last year due to covid outbreaks at my place of employment and I didnāt want to bring it home to my SPECIAL NEEDS child who is hard enough to to take care of. All my sister saw was me not working, thatās all!!! And she constantly gave me shyt about it. I cut off ties with her. Nothing makes you feel worse than already feeling bad then having someone make it worse!!! Call her out!!!
Yes I just had to do the same thing for my mum only 12 months ago with all of her 11 brothers and sisters as for when my grandparents had passed away my mum took in and looked after and cared for her youngest baby brother of the whole family he lived with and was constantly looked after by my mum all of his life since his mum and dad passed as my mum was the only 1 that gave a crap to care for or even want to look after him as he was a full blown very bad alcoholic and to all his other siblings he was nothing more then a burden and a disgrace to them all besides my mum and then when he passed away himself only just 12 months ago they then all wanted to turn around and fight my mum for everything of his which they were not getting a single bar of anything of his as they did not ever give a crap about him or ever wanted anything to do with him. So yes know the feeling very very well and sometimes yes ya just have to say something to put some ungrateful people in their places family or not.
Yes stand up for him because no one else will and she will continue to think saying this Bs is ok
Yes say something because they didnt do shit to help.so yes say something i would have given them.a ear full
Youāre brother is a Blessed person for doing a good job ā¦
Give/send them each a letter explaining how lucky your mom & they were to have him care for her. Explain his sacrifices & how he is now suffering from guilt. Explain it with kind loving words but be firm. A letter will avoid loud arguing.
At the funeral say a few words of thankfulness for your brothers selfless act of caring for her & how his love for her added priceless comfort & several years to her life. Thank him for being a good son to yāallās mother.
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i absolutely would call her out, she didnāt take over he did he chose to step up and take call of yāallās Mother.
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You explained it very well here! You could copy and paste it to her. Your words are actually put very kindly for being so disappointed in her. With the reminder to thank and hug him! Bless his 
.
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I would make a speech at the wake/funeral honoring his actions. I think your father should do the same and stand up for him as well. If your father was 100 % behind your brother not working to take care of his mother then call them out. They are trying to make him feel guilty for honorable actions. They are doing this so they have someone to blame for their lack of help all the while they are gaining sympathy from others. Iād call them out then cut them OFF all together they sound toxic.
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This Brother was a Saint he did what he thought was right. The other siblings should have nothing to say in my view, they werenāt there to help, and that job is extremely exhausting and mentally and emotionally draining. The others are obviously very selfish if they are criticizing him to ANY degree. Yes someone needs to step up to the plate at the service and give credit where credit is due. The others should be ashamed of themselves. Hopefully once the Brother caretaker is over his grieving period he can eventually get a job.
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Do not confront ur sister just let it go.My brother accused me of pressuring my mom into leaving me her house(I took care of both my parents(for 10 yrs) before their deaths) and because of that fight he hasnāt havenāt talked to me in 7 yrs
Go on blast he deserves the recognition and thatās wrong of them to not too. On behalf of all young siblings everywhere thanks for being an awesome big sister! My sister is just like that too and in my moments of darkness has always been my savior! Tell them and make sure they know if anyone kept it going it was him too!
Give them hell itās always the ones that do the least run their mouths just shut them and up give your brother some peace
Iām sorry for your lossš¢ I would say something
What an awesome human your brother is,put the rest of the family in their place takes a special person to do what heās done
Iād focus more on your brother instead of potentially bring up drama. Yall just lost a loved one and stress is already at a high so Iād just leave it alone and just keep praising him. I wouldnt be opening up a can of worms right now. If it keeps continuing after the funeral then feel free but right now? Absolutely not.
Let the funeral proceed as usually and lay one in baby. Defend your brother girl!!!
You absolutely should say something to defend him and let him know how thankful you are. No one knows how difficult it can be not only emotionally but physically to take care of a parent when they are sick. He did an amazing thing doing it. I would wait til after the funeral to speak with them so itās not tense between yāall. Unless they say something b4 then.
Yes I would ur brother deserves it. Call it sister out so she knows maybe will get a reality check. Sorry for ur loss. Keep ur head up
Praise ur brother. There is nothing as great as having a sibling take care of ailing aging parents full time caretaker. Let all family know including your holier than thou selfish judging sister the appreciation to extend to him. With that said,Focus ur attention on ur brother> Depression will hit him hardest . Been there done that. Bless yall
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Tell her and tell her or whoever he showed how much he loved his mother by helping her and ask her what did she do. Tell her sheās the piece of sh%% for not raising a hand to help. Nobody these days wants to help parents until they know they fixing to die because they want to find out what they getting
You can talk til your lips fall off unfortunatelyā¦your siblings will still feel the same. No need in staying upset over that. Help your brother best you can and keep the good memories of your mother in mind instead of replacing them by causing turmoil within the family. God knows how everything happened. No need in trying to prove it to anyone else.
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