I’m married to a man that is very rude and obnoxious, he shows narcissistic behaviors… he used to treat me like a Queen, then back in may, his behavior changed and he was mean, argumentative, controlling, lying. One day, I found him in his house with another woman and he said that she was just friends. Well I believed it then he stopped calling and answering texts til he finally called and said it was over that I was crazy. His behaviors made me that way. The day after he ends it with me he is with another girl. 2 weeks later he calls me wants to reconcile he apologized and made promises and my dumb butt agreed to it, he ended it with her and we got back together and got married… for the first few months I was treated like a Queen again… then behavior changed again. we fight almost every day, somehow the argument is always my fault over the most stupid things or he could start it and say I’m the reason for everything wrong, that my family and the stress we caused him is the reason he left in the first place, he lies, is irritable, easily agitated, I work a part time job cause that’s all I can find where I live he gets disability, he never helps around the house or takes care of my vehicles or anything outside the house and I’m left to do it. I’ve done everything for this man and more beyond belief and for him to treat me like this is heartbreaking. He makes me question myself…. I love him with all my being but I feel like I have to walk on eggshells…. Well I met a man, I did lie and say me and my husband were separated but is currently living with me, this man is so sweet and romantic, he makes me feel like I feel a woman should feel in a relationship. I feel so guilty, it’s eating at me
You know your worth and what you deserve. If you leave him don’t do it for another man. Do it for yourself. That’s a choice no one can make for you.
Just make sure the man you met isn’t married
Leave your husband. Read everything you can on narcissistic behavior. Be single for a while until you have taken the time to work on yourself so you can enter your next relationship in a healthy state of mind.
You feel guilty because you are cheating on your husband. You should feel guilty. Even a crappy spouse deserves better than to be cheated on. You and your husband sound toxic. Take some time to love yourself.
If you lied about him, you’re done. Time to split
First you have to leave your crappy husband. Kick him out. You deserve so much better. Stay friends and actually get to know the other one before jumping into another relationship. I don’t think you have kids so it’ll be a bit easier to leave and divorce.
Move out or have him go. Then tell him. But how is ur new man gonna feel. Ur lying too.
You are the bad person in this situation. You knew what type of man you were with before you married him, but yet, still married him. There is never a good excuse to cheat on your spouse.
First you need to leave your husband and stop dealing with that crap or get therapy. Second when a person is in a bad relationship any attention from another can make them seem fantastic but the grass isn’t always greener on the other side. If the new guy is actually great and fantastic well even if he isn’t you need to be honest with him and not lie. My best advice is you need to fix and worry about yourself for a bit without any man and just focus on you and your kids. Until you do that no relationship will work out
Y’all need to end it! He’s cheating …your cheating. How is this okay to stay together??
So you came here to tell the world you are doing the same thing to your husband that he did to you and you want advice? On what? Grow up!!
The answer is never in finding someone new, it is in breaking free from the attachment and loving yourself and healing before moving on otherwise the face will change but eventually patterns will repeat themselves until you heal you!! I am on that road now after 11 years attached and unhappy.
So you are just as bad as he is! You guys are both cheating on each other….
Leave your husband, ditch the other one and work on YOU
The only person you should need to validate yourself is YOU
You’re worth is not based on how a man treats you, it’s based on how you treat yourself and other people!
U caught him w another women in ur home! Wake up girl he was having an affair. He was so quick to end it he’s got a side piece. U need to leave him behind!
Never start a friendship or relationship on a lie. Come clean tell him the truth about your marriage. Put most of all leave your husband.
Y’all are messy 
Just LEAVE already 
jumping into another relationship is a bad idea btw.
It sounds as though you both need to grow up a bit because you’re just as bad or probably worse than your spouse because you’re a married woman who’s having extra marital affair…
So your man cheated on you
You took him back
Married him
And now you want out and is cheating on your husband because you guys can work out the problems
Ehhhhh
If your husbands sudden and massive changes in behavior arent drug related then he has an on and off switch on his psychological dysfunction button which means his behaviors are elective, if your going to take the exit on this relationship thats understandable, but dont overlap into a new one with lies
Dump husband and be happy, Even if that relationship doesn’t work out for you it will be your best move to move on from that husband of yours
You should feel bad, you’re doing what your husband has done to you. 2 wrongs don’t make a right.
If your husband is as bad, then get the ball rolling to divorce him and break free. But don’t just jump into another relationship either. You probably have some pretty big blinders on… be cautious but handle your business.
First of all, do you have kids? If not, you’re free to go without any feelings of “you did something wrong”. If kids aren’t involved, leave.
Unless… you have the emotional and mental ability to understand that its NOT YOU who’s the narcissist. When you finally realize you’re with a narcissist, and you realize that you still want to be with that person, you have to have a strong mind. You have to love yourself. You have to realize it’s not you. You have to realize that your partner isn’t in the right headspace to care for your needs and etc.
Look, mine was that way too. It all clicked one day for me and I have never put up with it since. You have to have a good memory too, you have to learn how to navigate the arguments to make your man realize that he is blaming you for everything. My husband does shit around the house, and he is a great dad. You just have to learn the ways of narcissistic behavior and seriously research it. They really don’t know how they are. Like I said though, ya gotta go if you dont have kids. Your husband is on disability, he doesn’t do anything for you, he cheated on you, no kids, why are you even there?
He’s cheating, your cheating, why are you still together? Your both obviously not happy together so split and go be happy.
Kick the ass to the curb. You can do better. The issues are not going away
If you truly loved him, you would not have been looking for someone else. That’s your answer. You don’t love him, he treats you like crap. Move on!
Leave I put with this and more for 21 years it just gets worse
Dump both men!! Sounds like you need to work on yourself!
The day he ends it with you he’s with another woman that would by far be enough for me I would get a divorce as soon as possible. Sounds like this other guy is a nice man from what you’re saying. You never know how things will end up with the new guy, but hey that’s the chance we all take.
get rid of this lying cheat , history repeats itself
Both BOTH are at fault…if you want out then leave, you are sinking to his level hy being a cheater. Work on yourself and stop chasing dick.
You need to just leave!! You two are not happy! It sounds like you got married thinking everything would back the way it used to be. But it didn’t. Should have never married a man like this. He’s putting you down all the time. You don’t need that. You should just move on, make yourself feel worthy. It’s not gonna change. I can already see that. Make your self happy.
You have got to leave him. He clearly is never gonna stop treating you this way.
So divorce or dump him and be with the one u want ,but that guilt still gonna be there
Well clearly you don’t love him as much as you say…
Thank God there are more helpful comments or polite disagreements than the few that should have just kept scrolling. So happy that you took the time to stop and help clear things up, but please keep living your best life and leave the crappy ones to us who know exactly what position our brave woman is in who spoke up to get some help. Her skin is thick enough having to deal with a man like this, she doesn’t need another layer, she needs reassurance that she can remove some.
You shouldn’t feel bad if he treats you like s*** then it’s time to move on
Why is he getting ssd? Physical or mental disability? If mental you knew what you were headed towards. Physjcal you also knew what you were headed for with help in chores. You just need to own your part and get a divorce . Also come clean with the other guy or you are no better then ur husband honestly.
I think you know the answer to this issue. If it was me, I would leave the marriage and find your own happiness first and work on you, then you can do another relationship with someone new after finding yourself. No one can make you happy but yourself. Best wishes.
And sadly that other man is more than likely just as narcissistic. We tend to repeat the pattern. Its a horrific truth. Run the fuck away and get out. Rely on yourself. It seems thats all there is anymore is sick men and sick women out here
There’s really no chance for us to have normal relationships it seems anymore. That in itself is devastating
Lol. Some of y’all ladies picking these stupid men knowing their behaviors, it blows my mind. The stupidity.
You lied, you should feel guilty 
Also you are seeing another man… while lying about it, you very obviously do not love your husband with all your being.
Ditch them both, work on loving yourself.
Get totally rid and let some other women have him. Sounds like you do it all already! Why make your life crap by staying with someone like that x
You need to get your shit together. Divorce your husband and then move on. When the guy you are with now, finds out that you lied and that you are actually married and you haven’t even started the divorce process there’s a chance he’s going to leave you and that’s on you.
If he is a narcissist… RUN
Leave asap. Enjoy your new found love just don’t make the same mistake and get to know him first.
Your dumbass needs to be single and work on yourself