My brother has 6 kids & i have 5. None of my family including my mom or me are allowed to see ANY of his kids because his babymamas have issues with HIM. My 5 are the only ones shes got to see in YEARS Its really ridiculous & sad especially seeeing how much it hurts my mom.
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File for grandparentâs rights
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The vibe Iâm getting from this post is that sheâs a bitter baby mamma and taking out her anger from your son, onto you, which isnât fair.
Iâm almost positive covid doesnât have a thing to do with it 
The word âappointmentâ does sound harsh, but also I get that to an extent, at least âmake plansâ and establish a time a day so sheâs not thrown off when you come.
But Sounds like she acts like you can come see him but switches up depending on her mood. 
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Look into seeing if your state has grandparent rights. If so take it to court.
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My grandson means the absolute world to me, I would b heart broken if I wasnât allowed to see him!!
My suggestion to u is to go to a lawyer, first for a paternity test to ensure your son is defo the dadâŚsecondly if the results come back that he isâŚkick your son up the qrse and tell him to step up to his responsibilities! And if the mother still refuses yous access to see him then if u really want a relationship with your grandsonâŚsee a lawyer
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Grandparents have rights too. Get a lawyer
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Are you vaccinated? Itâs a hard time to have a baby and she may be worried about Covid. Having to âmake an appointmentâ is not that strange to me⌠my family doesnât visit without telling us, and since she has more than one child they may be busy and need to know when you are coming. This all really depends on the situation and itâs hard to know what your relationship with her is like from this. But I wouldnât give up on a child you want in your life.
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Girl, disrespectfully stfu. Youâre throwing a tantrum like a toddler I donât get to see my grandchild (NOT your child) so should I just pretend I donât have one? Boo hoo. Suck it up. You are not entitled to see your grandchild whenever you want to, itâs up to the parents. You just outed yourself as somebody that only cares about their wants and does not respect boundaries. This is not your child and you need to get that through your head. You said it yourself, itâs her child. Her child, her rules. âThis isnât the grandma experience I dreamed ofâ lmfao. It isnât about YOU lady. Iâd keep you FARRRRR away from my kid too
She may just feel uncomfortable due to the strained relationship with your son. Personally I think if it is important to YOU, you should keep trying. She may want you to make appointments to see him, but it may not always be that wayâŚit sounds like an awkward situationâŚfrom all angles. Over time things might get easier.
I schedule my visits with my grandsonâŚhis parents are not together and my and his mom didnât have the best of relationships til he was born. Now we are great because I have respect for her as his mother. Itâs her child, her house, and her rules. He is also almost six hours away. I would never dream of just âpopping upâ! What if sheâs busy? What if they are sick? What if she just doesnât want company? Itâs called respect. Even if we was to argue, I would never in my wildest dreams, ever give up on my sweet dumplin! Try to be more understanding on her part. Sheâs obviously raising the grand baby without your son which is hard on its own but to have more than one kid by yourself is just chaos.
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- How many baby dadâs not your concern
- If your son wasnât ready he should had used protection
- What did you do for her not to allow you to see grandson
If it was you and in the same predicament in these times and ages trying to protect your child⌠what would you do.
Accept her rules if you feel you over stepped your boundaries apologize ask when will you be able to see the child under her rules. .if she agree ok bring a gift .if she doesnât agree thatâs ok too. .
If you are skeptical all around ask your son does he feel the child is his if not suggest a paternity test. ( Just so you know if he signed BC itâs his no matter what)
Other wise calm down and start over and be nice 
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First and foremost, the fact that she has 3 kids with 2 different dads is none of your business. As far as âgrandparent rightsâ go - you can attempt however you have to prove that you and the baby have already had an established relationship, this situation is negatively impacting the child, and/or you have to prove the mom to be an unfit mom. It is obviously and any court will see that you didnât have an already established relationship with the baby, the mother is not unfit, etc. As far as having to pick a time, it sounds like the mom is making boundaries for her child. I am not a fan when people show up to my house unexpected. More or less because we have a routine. If you do not respect her boundaries, you arenât obligated to see her child - whether you are blood or not. If your son is making no attempt at all and like you mentioned your son wasnât not âreadyâ for this step, it sounds like the mama may be protecting her child from what can cause future problems for him. Not just that, if you were struggling to be excited about your new grand baby for the mere fact of your son not being âreadyâ - the mama likely sensed that, knew that, etc. so she is having additional boundaries because of that. If my child was born early and was a premie, I would want to limit who is around especially considering covid is very much a thing still as well as RSV and other things that can easily be given to a little one. I donât think you should give up. I think you should respect the mamas boundaries. I would also hope you would tell your son you expect him to âman upâ, âgrow a setâ, etc. because it takes TWO to TANGO 
whether they are together or not he should be at least offering to purchase things for baby or even help with baby.
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Yikes so many of you women are/are gonna be mother-in-laws/grandmas from hell 
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Try to befriend her for now and schedule visits. With having multiple kids having a schedule is helpful and necessary for some. I have 4 and I would think it inconsiderate for someone just to pop by without asking. That being said remember that mother is now also a part of your life forever and her feelings are valid too. So maybe offer to help out with housework. Laundry, dishes, babysitting other kids. Your son may not be present but you can still be involved if you make friends and be a supportive person in their life.
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File for grandparent rights
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Look into Troxel v Granville. You have rights as a grandparent. Donât give up on your grandson.
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In some states grandparents have rights. Get a lawyer and see what your options are.
Im sending a big high five to you for trying to be apart of your grandsons life! My husbandâs mom doesnât even care about my kids. She never wants to see them or speak with them.
I also donât see the point of pointing out she has 3 children and 2 different dads or how they been off and on. It sound like you may need to get past some resentment/judgement. She is the mother to your grandchild which in my opinion deserves respect especially if you want it from her.
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Was there a paternity test done
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Have you tried bonding with her ? How was your relationship before the baby ? . I have a new born prem and Me and the dad have asked everyone to be respectful and to make an appointment due to our little girl being poorly . We honestly have so many appointments at the hospital too maybe see if she needs some help in that way . Iâm sorry itâs not the experience you were hoping for but it could get better you need to speak to your son and get him to step up because he laid down and made that baby he should be making an effort please donât make excuses for him heâs a fully grown man sort him out . One thing you could try is asking how she is I know as a new mum I was constantly asked how baby was but never me it makes all the difference. Good luck but prove to her your there to stay and make sure she knows you have her back and will work with her for the best outcome for the little baby
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I wouldnât want someone just stopping by for any reason. Especially with covid, I donât know why you donât understand. If she all of the sudden stopped you from seeing the baby there has to be a reason your not willing to say. Your son is a beadbeat if heâs not trying to see his kid.
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Go to court and get grandparent rights
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The fact that u just HAD to point out how many kids and babys dads she has speaks volumes on ur character 
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Probably not ur sonâs kidâŚ
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Itâs her rules and her child. No one owes you a grandchild. By appointment is normal. Itâs not your child, not your home, which means you call and get approval before invading. Sounds like you are just upset that you canât control and have your way. Respect her wishes.
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Im so sorry for your situation. Ive dealt with it too. They use the children to control us. Send letters to the child and packages. She may throw them away but you will know you are involved in some way. I worried the piss out of my first grandchilds mother. She told me she didnt want anything from me and to leave them alone. I was persistent. My granddaughter is 18 now and she knows the story of how we came to be. I didnt get to meet her until she was 9 months old. We have a wonderful relationship. She still doesnt have a relationship with my son, her dad. I did it for me and her. Prayers that everything will work out for you.
Most states have grandparents rights at least to visits.
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Is it even your sons kid
You can apply through the courts in the uk
And another things, who she has decided to sleep with and have children with in the past is absolutely none of your business. It is shameful and disgusting of you to speak down her in that way.
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A real grandma would never pretend they donât have a grandkid no matter what
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Thats your grandchild and you make an appointment to see them if thatâs what it takes. From experience, it really hurts when you know someone gave u on you because of tiny obstacles. Do whatever it takes.
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Usually if the mom wonât let you be the grandma you want to be, thereâs a reason. Perhaps some self reflection is needed instead of pointing the finger at her. Having a relationship with the mother would help too.
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My oldest sons grandma was a huge part of his life even tho her son was a deadbeat! I never kept her from him and our schedules were never an issue. We never had one disagreement, she was and still is the most awesome grandma out there and heâs now 30! Sounds like the baby momma needs to grow up, I was only 19! There is a thing called grandparent rights but itâs only 8 days a year or at least it used to be!
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You say you canât just stop by, you have to make an appointment. That seems strange to you? Why is strange to be respectful? I made the same request to my exâs father. âyou can see them whenever you want. Just please call first.â He refused. I had to drop my plans numerous plans because heâs just show up. If I wasnât home heâd sit on my porch & wait hours. Then expect an explanation of where his grandkids are. My advise to you if you really want to be in your grandsons life to respect her wishes. If you need to âmake an appointmentâ then so be it. How does that harm you? If things ended between your son & her on bad terms sheâs going to expect you to be like him. For example if he was controlling sheâll expect that you will try to control her. You did raise the man who made a baby but chooses not to be a father to him. Be considerate of her feelings. Sheâs the mother of your grandson. Not an object that you can pop in on whenever to mess up schedules, plans etc. Let her know that you want to be in babyâs life. Respect her, follow her rules. Sheâs the 1 raising this child, not you & obviously not your son. Whatever you do donât make him get custody or visitation so you can have the baby. If heâs going to file for parenting time HE needs to be the parent. Not depend on mommy. You canât coddle him forever. Itâs hard to think about but when you pass away heâll dump that baby off on anyone or abandon him because he never wanted to be in his life to begin with. Baby is better without him at all in that case. Plus sheâs not going to trust you or him.
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Iâm so sorry. I would never give up.
I feel for you, huge hugs. These people commenting donât know your situation and they certainly donât know this young mum. Which in my opinion doesnât give them the right to be so snarky and rude to you. I would suggest you keep trying with her, but without putting yourself in any harms way. Write letters etc to your wee grandson and pop them away in a special box for him. If things work out thatâs great if they donât he might come looking for family later. Try the legal way if you need to. All the best 
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I made people call ahead when my second was born and that was precovid. Mom is prob dealing with alot with the changes with her other children having a new sibling as well as the threat of covid. Be patient with her.
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Offer to give her a break, watch her kids for a few hours or offer to take all the kids. If you buy for one , you buy for all. As far as your son goes âŚhe wasnât ready âŚwell tough shitâŚheâs a father and needs to take responsibility. Maybe you should be gripping about the immaturity of him.
First, what does having 3 children by 2 different dads have anything to do with your question? Second, perhaps she is this way because you are the mother of your son. If he wasnât ready for a child he should have been wearing a condom and make sure she was on the same page, so thay is his fault. He could have been really mean and nasty to her, you never know what he has said to her, which is causing her to push you away. Men can be downright mean when something unexpected happens, so I would try and get her side, ask her how everything is and express that you are not your son. Also, I donât have a newborn and I detest when people just show up unannounced. Like please give me notice that you intend to stop by, just donât show up, I have a life and refuse to drop what I plan for anyone who cannot afford me some respect.
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Ace Makins yes! The Real problem here is that IS NOT HER GRANDMA EXPERIENCE SHE DREAMED OF!
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I canât BELIEVEEE the amount of people saying grandparents have rights. Sorry to burst ALL your bubbles but they absolutely DO NOT HAVE RIGHTS TO OUR CHILDREN. With covid getting bad again and the baby being born early I donât blame mom for not wanting anyone around. You all are a bunch of crazies if you HONESTLY think grandparents should have a right to children they didnât birth. And sorry but MOST states donât have grandparents rights unless BOTH parents are DECEASED⌠and the ones that do have them you need proof that the grandparents bonded with the baby and it would negatively affect the child not having them around. Which is very obviously NOT the case here. It really sounds like a boundary issue here. You probably stop by unannounced which is unacceptable. And the fact you donât get ur way so you say stuff like âoh should I just forget I have a grand son?â THAT IS a HUGE red flag for me I canât believe no one caught that!!! The fact you donât like her is very much clear by bashing on how many kids and baby daddies she had smh. !!!
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This sounds like an awful situation but, itâs your sons job to mediate the situation!
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Sounds like you need to finish raising your son before you worry about being in your Grandkids life. Also making an apt is not bizarre. Most people donât want other people dropping by whenever they feel like it. You schedule a time that is convenient for all.
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You can go to court and ask for grandparent rights
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The fact that youâre calling it an âappointmentâ shows that you need to set yourself some boundaries and need to grow up a bit. Iâm sure the mother didnât call it an appointment but you absolutely should be calling to see if itâs convenient to come around. Just showing up at someoneâs house is bad manners.
It sounds like youâre very judgmental of her the way you made a point of saying she has 3 children by two different dads (that really wasnât relevant to the rest of the post)!
My mother in law was a judgmental asshole too and I cut her off because neither me nor my son need that kind of negativity.
If the baby was born early the doctors so not to let anyone visit (not even family) or majorly restrict visitations for the first year of life due to a lowered immune system. This happened with my first neice. I wasnât able to see or hold her for months and we had to wacmsh our hands before touching her for the first year.
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Take the time to make the appointment ask if there is anything she or all of her kids need you have the opportunity to have bonus grandchildren learn all of their birthdays and do no more for your actual grandchild than you would do for the others. Look how many women have complained about one childâs grandparent leaves out the other kids. Once you develop a relationship with the mother I am sure she will allow more time with your grandchild. Keep in mind she hardly knows you would you want a stranger showing up unexpectedly?
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first of all is your son the father.
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P.s. my mom and mother in law canât just stop by. Rude to assume you should be able to and disrespectful of her boundaries. Make an appointment 
And here I am wishing my children grandparents would act like one!
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Wow your entitlement is amazing. You can keep complaining of not having âthe grandma experience you dreamed ofâ and âhaving to make an appointment â or you can start being respectful.
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Itâs never like the grandma experience you dream of
I kinda hate when ppl just stop in sometimes itâs a pain itâs not much of her to ask for you to make an appointment
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Make an appointment. It sounds like she barely knows you âŚher life isnât going to revolve around you.
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Unfourtanley and Iâm not agreeing with her, but she is the Mom. I feel she should be allowed to set the boundary of knowing when youâre coming over. I was raised that way, and have that boundary for my MIL. She was not happy, but eventually i think she understood. I also donât have a great relationship with her, and she has said and done some very hurtful things to us, and didnât respect many of our rules/wishes, so I feel its okay to set boundaries and make choices similar to that, but she also never seems to want to speak about it. Have you ever tried talking to her about this? Maybe youâve offended her or hurt her feelings someway. It might be worth a convo! Good luck grandma and congrats! 
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The fact that you mentioned that she has other kids by different baby dads doesnât have anything to do with you. As a single mom who has gone through something similar to what your grandchildâs mother is going through, I must say that it is a little difficult to deal with family members from your childâs paternal side KNOWING the fact that your dead beat baby daddy doesnât even wanna claim or be apart of his childâs life .Call me bitter , immature but I cut ties with every one of em .To me it just didnât make any sense
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Speak up and put your foot down there is a thing called grandparents rights you can take her to court
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Itâs Bizarre not bazaar
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Thereâs missing information here that is very relevant. How early was the child? If he spent a lot of time in the NICU then you probably COULDNâT see him just as she said. NICUs have strict rules for the safety of the child and they are even more strict since COVID.
In relation to that, just because a child is home, that doe not mean that they are healthy. Being born premature can cause a ton of long term health problems and a compromised immune system. I barely left the house with my daughter In the months after she got out of the NICU because her immune system was so bad and the last thing I wanted was for her to get sick.
With COVID now, I couldnât imagine the worry that I would feel.
Are you vaccinated?
As far as this not being the grandma experience you dreamed of, can you imagine what she must be going through? No mother dreams of their child being born early and having a hard start at life. Adjust your expectations and try to be a little more understanding.
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There is a big difference in using the words make an appointment or please call ahead. I hate when anyone just drops by my house.
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Or go for grandparent rights !
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So sorry for the situation. Sadly Grandparents are not as treasured as they once were, even when families are ânormalâ . We have differences with my husbandâs daughters and donât get to see our 3 grandparents even thoâ 2 are now adults and should know better. Very sad and painful x
Imma be honest I donât blame the mom. The baby was born early and with everything going on I wouldnât want people to just drop by with no notice either. Iâd just respect her wishes and talk to your son one on one at a later time
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What rules are you not following? I think itâs respectful to say hey can I come by and see so and so at this time. Itâs not making an appointment itâs just being considerate of the moms life!! Iâm sorry she is taking out your son being a pos on you but just try your best to fallow her rules and respect her as the mom.
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- I hate when people drop by unannounced.
- Thereâs still a pandemic happening.
If you would rather write off your grandchild as not existing than set up a time with mom? That sounds like your problem. Poor kid.
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Grandparents have a right to see their grandchildren. You can easily take it to court
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First of allâŚa premie is super immune compromised andâŚthe first few weeks are rough. You should never turn your back on the grandbaby andâŚthose other two kids need love and support to since he has chosen the package deal. I would offer to bring meals, diapers, or whatever is needed. Try to befriend this woman so your grandbaby wonât have to be a stranger. All women need and deserve support.
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Sounds like our situation with our sonâs daughter. She is going to be 3. We have only seen her maybe 12 times in her lifetime. Always has to have her mom present. Her mom wonât leave when she brings her and very controlled of what goes on. We canât get grandparents rights because Iowa doesnât have that for grandparents. Iâve talked to numerous lawyers. Sucks. But at least now our son gets to see her every 2 weeks when he make the 3 hour drive to see her. The mom doesnât even bring granddaughter to him smh. Why are some women so hurtful to people . We have been nothing but nice to her smh. Just very hurtful and emotionally draining to us. She doesnât hardly know us.
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If your grandchild was in the NICU for long I donât blame her, with this covid stuff going around I personally wouldnât allow anyone to just stop by either, especially with an early baby or a brand new baby. Even with no pandemic, I would expect a call if someone was coming to my house as well.
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There are grandparents rights in place in the event that she does try to keep your grandchild away from you. Hopefully, it wonât come to having to go to to court though, and hopefully she isnât keeping the baby from you because your son isnât stepping up (which is not your fault). The more people to love the child, the better.
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Whats your sonâs role in all of this? He can help arrange for you to see his child, and thereâs nothing wrong with setting up a convenient time (appointment) for all of you. You might have to review your expectations, because it sounds like there are a lot of other people to consider in this situation. Her other children, for starters. Congratulations on being a grandmother!!
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Realistically⌠You can petition the courts for grandparents rights of visitation⌠get on touch with the clerk of the courts in your county and ask
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OKAY HEAR ME OUT. Most states have GRANDPARENT RIGHTS may be called something else. You can get visitation 
Iâve never been in this situation, but maybe if she will agree to let you see him with an appointment, if you can start out that way, maybe she will warm up and change- one can only hope. Good Luck!!
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Wow! Allot of you remind me of my nightmare MIL and why we cut her out of our lives We are a happier family because of it 
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Grandparents arenât parents. She isnât obligated to let you see them. Depending on the state laws you may or may not have rights. She is the mother she legally has the rights to tell you yes or no. Sorry not sorry. Maybe she doesnât like something that YOU are doing when youâre around the child.
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Fight for that grandbaby!!! By any means necessaryâŚHe deserves to have his Grandmother in his life!!
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Itâs ok that you have your feelings and you are grieving what should have been, but he is her kid. Especially since your son decided to leave things broken and not be a dad. She makes the rules. You can petition to see the child via grandparents rights if that applies in your state. Other than that looks like your son really screwed things up for you on that front. His decisions have consequences for everyone involved. I do think sheâs really something to be accepting your gifts but refusing to let you see the child at any capacity but she is the shot caller because sheâs the only responsible party for that child. Her responses will be at least equal to yours so speak kindly, make no demands and make an appointment. If I had grandbabies Iâd be beating down the door to see them in any way they would permit me to knowing full well Iâm at their mercy. Donât give up on the ones you love.
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I have never and will never just knock on anyoneâs door without asking 1stâŚno matter who it isâŚitâs a little rude and imposing to me
Forget your son, the mother is the gatekeeper of that child and if you are to have a chance of any form of relationship with your grandson its gonna probably start with a respectful dialog with her
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Sorry youâre going through thisâŚ.but please take a minute and put yourself in the momâs position. Would you welcome unannounced visits to your home by a stranger? Wouldnât you want to do what you could to protect your preemie?
Doesnât matter if she has 10 kids by 10 different dadsâŚ.your son chose to participate and created a babyâŚ.it takes 2. And she may be hesitant starting a relationship with you due to the fact that your son wasnât ready for a kid. It takes time to build a relationship with someone and build trust.
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Thereâs a thing called grandparents rights where you can take her to court and still see your grandchild
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I donât like anyone to stop by unannounced, friends, parents, in laws. Maybe itâs also a hard adjustment for her. Maybe her other childrenâs grandparents arenât involved and donât make an effort to be. Thereâs a lot of things that can play into this situation to provide different outcomes
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So make a fucking apt. Solved. 
Her house. Her kid. HER FUCKING RULES LADY.
As a parent with a child who had a stay in NICU at birth, I didnât want anyone near him and even now at 18 months Iâm iffy with who I do allow to be around or touch him. But I wouldnât write off a grandbaby. Maybe mom is struggling with a safety concern regarding babyâs immunity
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Youâre surprised that you canât just stop by her home whenever you want? Iâm not surprised sheâs cut you out
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I went through this exact situation. Its so hard when its the SO actually having the child and not your own child, bc then you feel like if the relationship doesnât work out, you are the bad guy just bc you are related to the other parent.
My son had a child with a girl who went nuts and didnât let anyone get to know their child really until after the 1st year. Wouldnât accept gifts, Wouldnât let us visit, or even share a picture. I had to get it all from my son, who did do his best to get the mom to meet us half way. I always felt bad crying to my son, bc I too dreamed of this magic at being a grandparent. The 1st year was super hard. I swallowed a lot of anger and remained nice no matter how I was treated. Bc I wanted to know my grand daughter, so it wasnât about my feelings anymore. It was about her. Maybe take mom out to coffee or lunch, and just try to assure mom that you arenât trying to take over, or control anything. Whether you like mom or not, you have to have a relationship at least until the child is old enough to visit on their own. Until then you have to be the bigger stronger person. Do you ever offer to give her a break from other kids and maybe babysit all her kids? I know that seems like a lot, but it could open the door to a way to meet in the middle somewhere. My relationship with the mom is still hard at times. But its better. Mainly bc I keep telling myself, shes the mom, and there isnât any formal custody arrangements, my son actually has my grand daughter more than mom most weeks, and they just moved back in with us so he could save to buy a house. But I have learned extreme patience with mom when we do have to communicate. And sheâs gotten better as sheâs grown and learned that if help raising a child is offered, dont be stupid and slam the door without a good reason. Good luck.
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Iâd ask them why? See if there is a good reason. As what you need to do so they can accommodate seeing the child.
I havenât seen 2*of my grandkids for 20/years since my son passes away. But now at 95 WHO CARES I DON,T
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Your son could exercise his visitation and you could see the baby then.
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Do I just give up pretend I donât have a grandchild??? Really??? Why does not allow you to see the child at all?
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Yes give.and REMEMBER when your son wants!something SAY NO.GIVE UP
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Iâm so sorry you are going through that! I would never keep a child from its grandparents! I do however set up visits with my boys grandparents ahead of time and they do not just show up whenever, i wouldnât mind if they did, but I also donât just shoe up their house either, works for us both. Oh my heart breaks for you! My babies dad and I had a very rough breakup, protection orders and all, but I put my personal feelings aside for what was best for my child, having a relationship with grandparents is very important, and the bond my boy has with both sides of grandparents is so special, depending on where you live, you can take her to court for visitation, although that may only be like once a month, and take awhile.
My husbands mom pretends my children donât exist until she wants to tell someone I refuse to let her see them. Itâs been almost years and weâve had another child since my husbands mother was removed from my childrenâs lives because she put their lives in danger. We happened to move to the same town she lives in and she works at the only grocery store in our town. She still hasnât met our two year old. But she will drive 45 minutes to see my husbands brothers kid. Sheâs never once in that 6 years asked to see my children. She has never once asked to see my husband in that time either.
Coming from the momma of littles who have had their only living grandparent âgive upâ if youâre having to ask you already have.
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My MIL has nothing to do with my son, her biological grandson. She doesnât acknowledge him when she sees him out, none of their family does. It took my husband years to stand up to them and say enough was enough. Please take it from me, never stop trying, never stop making those ridiculous appointments, never stop making an effort, or buying gifts because one day your grandson will know you tried so hard to be apart of his life and thatâs something my son will never know. He will only have questions about why his own daddyâs family didnât want to be apart of his life.
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Itâs not about you and your grandma experience dreams⌠it is her newborn, and her boundaries. If you want a relationship with the baby at all, then it starts with respecting her wishes from the start.
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The thing is itâs not about you and your âgrandma experienceâ. Youâve had your baby and if heâs turned out to be a big disappointment then you canât claim a do-over baby.
In the middle of a Covid pandemic most people havenât been able to meet their grandkids especially if they are premature. Mum has probably had a lot to deal with on her own. Youâll get further by being kind and building a relationship with her
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She sounds like sheâs on a power trip. Either play her game or just give up and let her raise him herself