So my ex-fiancé and the father of my four-year-old daughter are getting married next year. We are friends, but I only really speak to him when he picks my daughter up from my house or sometimes over messenger. I only speak to his fiancé when she’s here with him too. We all get along nicely but we haven’t really had much to do with each other. I got a wedding invitation and I just want to know if it’s the right thing to go or not? I don’t want to intrude on their big day.
They were nice enough to invite maybe stop by for ceremony or a few minutes at reception to be polite for the invite. I wouldn’t hang out though.
They probably want the child there without the responsibility . So go enjoy yourself . Let loose . Cut it short if you need to . But only if you feel comfortable.
I wouldn’t, be too weird
Just stop the ceremony for a bit. Tell them congratulations and then head home.
If they felt comfortable enough to invite you, I wouldn’t turn it down. Maybe not stay the entire time if
You dont want to but otherwise I think it would cause negative feelings if you decline
I would go to help with the child and a nice gesture
I would just send a gift…
I went to my ex’s family wedding to help with our little one so he could enjoy himself while still having our son in the wedding
4 ur kids do it live n let live be happy 4 them and appriciate that they want you to be a part of their important day for the family of your kids you and them i think its a very good example to show your child/ren that you are included
I’d go! It was nice of them to.offer. I feel.it plays well into great co-parenting.
When my husband and I got married his ex-wife AND her husband attended the wedding and reception as well as their young son. My husband and his ex-wife have a son together and he was in the wedding. So what they did was being him to the wedding and took him home with them after the reception so we could have a good time without having to worry about him and where is was at the whole time
I’d send a nice little gift and congratulations. Maybe they did that to not seem “petty”.
If they’re both ok with it. Yes. If not don’t.
I would be there to attend to the child.
This sounds like Destination Wedding starring Keanu Reeves and Wynona Ryder.
If I was invited I would go to me, if I didn’t go I wouldn’t want them thinking it’s because I was being shady or something.
I would, ide take my lil one with me and bring her back with me so she could attend her dads wedding but he could also enjoy himself and not have to worry about who is looking after her
Every body move on , nothing wrong with going
Definitely go. Make sure you drink just enough to take the edge off, but not too much that your thoughts come off your tongue lol
Yes, he wants his child to go. If you feel comfortable attending with your child
You guys seem mature about everything… so why not go and enjoy getting dressed up… its all about uniting as family… the children will love to have that as a memory growing up.
I went to my ex’s wedding, we have a daughter together I had a good time
Yes! Am going to my ex husband’s wedding next year.
It’s rude if you don’t go.
I’d go. I’m sure your kid will remember it for a long time.
Yes. Co-Parent !! You received an invitation. This is amazing.
If it is for you and your daughter to attend then do the wedding ceremony and then head home. Great example for your daughter.
They sent you an invitation. I personally think it would be rude not to attend. If they thought you would be an intrusion, they wouldn’t have invited you.
I would look at this as an opportunity to become closer to them. She wasn’t petty and said not to let you come. THEY invited you which means they want you there. Enjoy yourself. Be happy for your daughter and congratulate them.
I actually have a really good perspective on this! Situation IDENTICAL to yours. I did NOT get invited to the wedding. ALL my friends and family thought that was WEIRD. They thought I should have been invited and I didn’t really think about it until they brought it up. I think they did the absolute right thing by inviting you and I don’t really think anything else matters besides that. I didn’t want to go to their wedding my son’s dad’s wedding- it was her day; but it would have been nice to be invited. If they had invited me I would have said, “I feel respected and included and I thank you for that. I won’t be attending but all the best to you in your marriage. Your marriage being successful is important to our child.”
Whatever you decide, I do not think it’s rude if you don’t go. In the slightest. The invitation and a cordial response can be enough.
But it is totally amazing you received an invite. Cool stuff.
Great perspectives on uniting the families. I love that too. My stance on it was totally my own and there is value in going as well.
I would say go but stay in the background… You’re all getting along and will be co parenting for the next how many years. This will also take some pressure of the father and his new bride when it comes to someone tending to your daughter as the evening goes on.
That’s really lovely that you all get on. Great co parenting. I would go but only if you are comfortable with it
They invited you. You don’t have to go if you don’t want to. But for the sake of co-parenting it might be nice for your kid to see you two supporting each other. Also, I imagine your ex and his bride would like their wedding night (post reception) alone.
My ex and father of my child came to my wedding.
His dad was my wedding singer lol.
Go. Be there for your daughter’s father and her stepmother. Just be the guest. Not the ex. Just a supportive relative for your little girl. It will mean the world to her in the future.
I would go but, be there to help attend to your daughter.
It would be nice for her to see all of the important adults in her left be friends and get along.
I would go. It was a nice gesture of them to invite you and it would make a good memory for your daughter to have her whole family there getting along and supporting each other.
if there are no harsh feelings then go! be there for your daughter and her dad. you were invited so i don’t think this would be intruding at all. co parenting also consists of supporting the other person and wanting them to be the best version of theirselves so they can be the best they can to your children.
They PERSONALLY sent u an invitation. I would go. Forsure.
I’d go I think it’s very mature
Ummm ya …my ex-s wouldn’t want me anywhere near their wedding … but on a differnet note, if you guys get along decently enough I would say go!
Go. Show your daughter you’re still a family just now with more people who love her
You got an invitation you aren’t intruding! Get them a gift too. Yes you and daughter should go, be happy for them!! I was so happy when my ex found someone he could love.
I would go! It’s a bonus for them as well, because they can have your child at their wedding but in your care, so they don’t have to be the responsible parent that day but she still gets the experience and memories.
The only question, would you feel comfortable? If not, give them a gift and call it a day. If you’d be fine, they obviously are too, so go.
What i wouldn’t give to have a healthy relationship with my children’s father. You have no idea how rare that is!
Getting an invite is a sign of respect already for you from your ex husband yet for me there’s no need for you to come. Let them enjoy their big day and so people can focus on them and not on you instead. You can have someone you trust accompany your children going to their wedding if you want them to go. Not going is a sign of respect as well. You can be happy for them without going.
It’s great that you all get along but unless you’re going to keep your daughter entertained so that she can be there for their big day, then I think it would be pretty awkward you being there at all
Is just get them s nice gift. But with having a child maybe go to the reception for an hour…
Why not ? If you have a good relationship with them . I would go .
My ex husband and my youngest daughters dad and their familys came to mine. Go, its totally normal and fine.
I would send a gift with a nice card wishing them the very best. It is for your daughter that things go well for them
You should go it’s his daughter and he obviously respects that your her mother just keep her entertained etc while your there make small talk you’ll be fine
My mother got marred .she ask my dad to come and my s-dad ex to come as well . Think it’s nice
They probably just want you there for your daughter, enables them to relax on their special day and know shes taken care of.
I would go. Enjoy their happiness
I was invited to my daughter’s dads wedding and i went it was beautiful and my daughter was the flower girl… u should go ur all family one way or the other
My husband and I went to my exes wedding, reception and stayed at the hotel with them and a few others to hang out and talk. But my ex is also my husbands best friend since middle school
They invited you, you’re not intruding. Go for your daughter.
Well if you got an invitation then I would assume it’s fine
i would go it shows your daughter that things are fine and that she will always have the love from all involved
It’s good for your daughter!
I too am friends with my daughter’s father and if he was in a situation where he was getting married I probably wouldn’t show up to the ceremony but would probably get a small gift and maybe show up at the reception
Some of y’all have never seen How I Met Your Mother and it shows.
I’d get to know the soon to be wife as long as it’s not too awkward for you or them. It’s good to have a relationship with them and model to your daughter that just because you and her father broke up, it doesn’t mean you will ever fight or just not talk and it’s an extension of her family. You befriending basically another third of the co-parenting would be good too as you can be on the same page a lot easier.
You are invited so you wouldn’t be intruding. I say go & have a good time. Your daughter will be happy that your are there.
You really want to go to your ex’s wedding ?
If you got an invitation, they must want you to come. Bring the daughter.
If they invited you, go!
Maybe just double check with the soon to be wife just in case.
My husbands ex came to our wedding it was purely for the kids.
If they invited you, then it’s not a problem.
I would go, it’d be nice for your daughter to see the three of you getting along!
You got an invitation so they obviously want you there. I don’t see the harm in going, especially if you get along. I think it’s nice that you have a cordial relationship with your ex. I think it would be a good idea to try and become friends with your ex’s fiancé because this person is going to be in your child’s life. Even a “broken” family is a family and I think it’s lovely they’re wanting you be there on their day.
I wouldnt go to the ceremony but I’d go to the reception. It shows my son that not matter what for his sake we can all get along. And that he doesnt just have one mommy or ome daddy he just 2x the love there was before. But thankfully his daddy and I are still together
Go!! Help out with your kid I assume they’ll be in the wedding in some fashion and if she has kids or they have kids together help out with them too!!! It’s wonderful that they want you there enough to invite you!!!
Would feel like a slap in the face
No. I would not go. I would appreciate that they sent an invite. I think it shows that you guys have a good co parent relationship. I would help with sending my daughter to the wedding and stay away.
I had very good relasionship with exs new misses. I went to their wedding, was lovely day. My son loved having mum and dad at family event
Don’t go. for ur sake don’t go. Ur kids will survive with u not climbing mountains to make it know. U get along. No hard feelings it’s just not necessary to attend.
go if you want to go
No. I would not, disrespectful to his new wife
Shoot, keep getting along.
Healthy relationships are good! Just because you two didn’t work out, doesn’t mean you can’t still wish him the best & be friends for your kiddos sake.
that’s a tough one…
Go I went 2 my exs wedding with my new man and our 2 boys was great day
They must think a lot of you to invite you. Go. Be gracious. Be sweet. Wish them the best. Great foot to start good co parenting on
- you were invited.
- go as a friend, not an ex.
- let your daughter see that even though things didn’t work out, you can still be friends with the other parent of your child. Give her these awesome memories. Also most couples make guest list decisions together, they chose to include you together most likely
They invited you, so if they want you there it’s nobodys business. Likely your daughter would be better cared for in all the excitement with you there too.
I say go unless you have feelings for dad still if ever. It’s not really about you and him it’s about your child seeing no matter what mom and dad get along and will go above and beyond for said child. If feelings are there he’s getting married time to move on from that and take care of the one person you both have in common. YOUR CHILD
Maybe they want you to go so that you can take your daughter and be part of their day but have you there to look after your daughter so she is having a good time and being looked after as they will have enough on their plate without having to always be responsible for her too.
There’s a lot of thought that goes into who you want at your wedding. It’s a very intimate and vulnerable experience that they want you to be a part of. Go!!! Be a friend!! Getting along with them and supporting them isn’t a bad thing. Your daughter will learn from that… you would be setting a wonderful example for her to follow. If they thought you’d be a problem, or intrude on their big day, they simply wouldn’t have invited you. Go & have fun with your daughter!!! good luck to you, mama!
If you’re invited and you want to go then go for the kids you dont have to be besties its just a mutual respect and adult decision for the kids… my exs new wife wants me to be a bridesmaid in their wedding when they have a renewal wedding for family… at first i thought it was weird but we all have a good relationship so why not… definitely a day no one will forget…
They sent you a invite cuz they wanted you to go.
I’d go I that case. Memorable for your kid for you to go with them.
I would have taken my son to his dads wedding but I wasn’t invited so I didn’t go. Didn’t bug me, but I would of went if asked.
That would be easy for me, if there’s honestly no problem, your daughters 4, this woman going to be in your child life, invite her for coffee, you’ll know if your really invited for the right reasons
I guess for me it would depend upon WHY you guys split up. For instance, my kids dad is going to be getting married. He cheated on me something awful for a decade, and left me to raise the kids by myself the entire 10 years even though we were married, and I raise them almost entirely now. At best he sees them every other weekend. He lied to them last Christmas about being sick so he could go to Christmas parties with her. Now, we all get along fine. We’re even friendly. But I wouldn’t go to their wedding if they invited me, because to me he should have never walked out on his family to go live an entirely different life. It has nothing to do with me having any feelings for him, because lord knows I don’t. I guess for me it has to do with the fact that he massively disrespected our kids and shorted them entirely. I in no way am happy about or support what he is doing because it is nothing but selfish of him. He begged me to marry him and have kids. Both of them were planned. And then once they were here he decided it wasn’t what he thought it would be. Some may think it is just me being salty or petty, but it isn’t. It really ticks me off for my kids. I have zero against the girl he is marrying, and like her perfectly fine. My choice has nothing to do with her and everything to do with him. Now, if we had just grown apart and went our separate ways in life and no one had done anyone wrong - I would go. That would be different to me. My answer to you would really depend upon why things ended between you two.
Go! They are giving the Olive branch. Co-parenting and being friends with your ex & his wife is the best thing for your child!
I would graciously decline. I would thank them for the invite but would say it is their big day and you do not want to take away from it. You don’t know how you will feel and the last thing you need is to get emotional on that day (I cry at weddings) I personally would not go. It has nothing to do with being grown. I personally feel that there is a place for you in their life but this is one time that is not it.
If they thought enough of you to send you an invite, just go. That’s a big olive branch. Don’t over think it. It could be a great start to the rest of all of your lives, especially concerning your daughter.
Love, a step mom. and a step daughter.
If it will make you uncomfortable don’t go.