Its not your decision, its theirs. Its not just you with that surname , also your daughter has it and she can do what she likes just like you did!
4 Likes
Itās not really your decision, but give your blessing for him to change his name to yours. Heās clear why he wants to take the name - his own family is not in his life anymore and he is joining yours. He sees you as his only remaining family.
They are getting married to each other, itās not your place to think about him getting divorced and giving your name away. If they do get divorced someday you can address it with him then. If your daughter has children with him will they not be part of your family? If he later has other children will they not be siblings? Heās becoming a part of your familyās line.
10 Likes
Stop living your life worried that something bad will happen in their relationship. If heās a good guy that gets along well with everyone then let him change his name in honor of his tie to your family. Also what if your daughter has kids with him then your cherished last name will be passed down.
And you sound ridiculously stuck up.
6 Likes
If it comes to the point down the road they do divorce at that point he could request to change his last name at final orders. I think itās kinda sad that you mentioned divorce and children with another woman when they arenāt even married yet. Let them have this moment donāt ruin for them throwing divorce in the mix over a name change.
Itās up to them not you at all honestly. Your daughter only asked how you feel about it not if you give permission or anything. So you can feel however you want.
1 Like
I understand all of that. Why doesnāt he change his last name to his mothers maiden name before getting married, then she can take that last name when they marry?
1 Like
If they get a divorce she can just request he change his last name back before signing off on the divorceā¦
This is the most stupidest question. Iām sorry but if my daughter got married and her new husband wanted to take her last name. I wouldnāt have questions. It would be between them.
Itās not just your name itās your daughterās name as well.
5 Likes
This is just weird. Who cares what his last name isā¦
1 Like
For a man to want to take his wifeās last name is not common. The fact that he has put thought into the entire thing and wants a name that means something to him and his wife shows how much this marriage means to him. You canāt predict the future. Just like a woman can go back to her maiden name if she chooses to after a divorce, a man could do the sameā¦but that is not something you should be thinking about before they are even. They are grown adults about to commit their lives to each other. Let them do it the way that they want to. Stop being so selfish and negative and support them.
7 Likes
Ffs 
what a joy you sound love!!
WTF itās not up to youā¦
1 Like
If you donāt want your last name to go instinct, then is itās quite straight forwardā¦
1 Like
With it being so rare, their children will carry it on. Please donāt assume divorce. And if they do divorce she can ask him to change his name back and it will be simple at the divorce proceedings
3 Likes
Itās up to your daughter and her fiance. Was nice of them to ask. But itās her last name and if he wants to take it on. Then so be it.
1 Like
Youāve already said youād be supportive of whatever they chose. So, why donāt you just stick with that sentiment?
3 Likes
Who cares. He can always change his last name to his motherās last name if they get divorced. Your making a big deal out of nothing.
Anyone else super curious about this special name thatās so rare they are the only ones in a country of 331 MILLION people to have?
16 Likes
This is so stupid. 
Worried about a last name? Seriously?
1 Like
I donāt really see how thatās your choice at all. Itās not in your control.
2 Likes
Am I the only one dying to know this ālast ofā last name? 
12 Likes
Correct me if Iām wrong but your last name isnāt really āyoursāā¦ right? You married your husband and changed your last name. Can you imagine if someone told you that you couldnāt have your husbandās last name? Sounds like your daughters fiance has put some thought into this but ultimately it isnāt your decision at all!
9 Likes
Should you let him?
If you actually think you have a say and your daughter listens to you I hope he runs!
6 Likes
It is not up to you what he does with his last nameā¦
2 Likes
Itās not ur choice, he respected u enough to come to u and ask u for ur permission, he or ur daughter didnāt have to do that at all, they both respected u enough to ask ur permission for him to use yāallās last name 
so let him use it 
3 Likes
A lot of harsh remarks hereā¦Maybe itās not āher callā but her daughter asked her her opinion on this and she is just voicing her thoughts.Nobody wants their daughter to end up divorced but sadly thatās not an uncommun reality in this societyā¦
1 Like
Itās technically only your last name through marriage soš¤·āāļø
5 Likes
If he really wants to take his motherās last name, they can both take her last name on their wedding day. Otherwise, I think it would be sweet of him to take your daughterās last name
2 Likes
This sounds like a nightmare of a MIL. Itās just a last name
7 Likes
Let them decide, provide support, be a good mother in law.
Should you let him 
you donāt really have a say if thatās what they want to do thatās what they want you shouldnāt stand in the way
1 Like
I meanā¦if she takes his lastname their kids wonāt have the lastname either.
6 Likes
I kinda want to know what this last name isā¦ 
4 Likes
āLetā interesting choice of words.
2 Likes
I would feel it is an honorā¦ But in our familyā¦ Once you are family you are always familyā¦
3 Likes
If you said youād be supportive, maybe you should stay with that. By telling them no youād be going against that which would make you a hypocrite.
I think it was nice of them to ask but really not up to you at all, you should be honored not already deciding they may get divorced.
It was his name all his life, he should keep it that way
Why do you have a say in it?
6 Likes
Wtf seriously?? If you say no to this just know that he is 100% going to think he is not welcome in the family or accepted and you know what I would too and it will put a strain on their relationship too. I mean come on besides it isnāt up to you and you canāt stop it eitherā¦ atleast then your last name will live on throught their children isnāt that great though?? I donāt get it so silly
2 Likes
Flipping heck Iām glad itās not my future MIL itās just a name 
6 Likes
Iām dying to know this last nameā¦
1 Like
He can start his own legacy
Keep his last name
Not all about the ties
Itās about his life with u and kids
Itās not even up to youā¦
4 Likes
Do what normal people do. Grin and bear it. Itās not your decision.
3 Likes
This really has nothing to do with you.
2 Likes
You sound like an awful MIL already worried about their divorce 
this post sounds more selfish than anything else
17 Likes
Honestly, He could go change his last name to your name without marrying her.
5 Likes
If I want to change my name to Princess Consuela Bananahammock, I do not need the permission of other Bananahammocks.
30 Likes
The best ones in the USA with this last name?! Lady you sound crazy
5 Likes
Uhmmā¦ Iād stay out of it love.
Geesh if your daughter reads this, ever 
If itās such an issue maybe see if heās hyphenate the name.
2 Likes
So what the Nameā¦ Inquiring minds want to knowā¦???
2 Likes
Sounds like he wants to honor your family by taking the name.
Soooooo he loves your daughter SO much. That he wants to give up the name heās had his whole life to take your daughters name to build a new life with a strong family nameā¦
And youāre worried about divorce? Obviously they arenāt worried about divorce, so you shouldnāt either.
Also. He lost his mother, so Iām sure he has had the thought that marrying your daughter would mean that heās also gaining a motherā¦
And be a better mother and love that boy.
17 Likes
Technically anybody can go & get their name changed to anything they want - I donāt think youād really be the only ones with the same last name in the US (thereās a whole wide world out there too remember) & I think youāre being very weird about it. He isnāt your daughterās boyfriend, Theyāre engaged & getting married why are you thinking about āIf they break up & he has babies elsewhere theyāll have my nameā did your own mother in law say that about you when you got married & took your husbandās last name 
3 Likes
but then their children would keep your " uncommon " last name and would grow the lineageā¦
but more to the point ā¦ its their choice and if he wanted to change his name to prince poppycockā¦ then he 2 could have an uncommon last name.
2 Likes
I want to know this super special last name.
You do realize that basically anyone can change their last name if they choose? No explanation needed. I can change my last name to Drjvsshknvfefvknvffbvvg if I wanted to. Iāll change my last name to yours right effing now.
You are an ass.
Really want to know this precious last name now something tells me youāre a Smith or Wilson or some other slave owner surname thatās common but you just donāt want him to have your surname, Karen
2 Likes
Way to make someone feel unwanted
2 Likes
It wasnāt your last name when you married into it and took it. Did you need your FIL permission to take HIS last name?
7 Likes
It isnāt your choice, you have absolutely no say in the matter! Did youāre husbandās family get a say in you taking on the name? Also nice way to doom your daughters marriage before it starts. I personally wouldnāt want to share a name with you, if this is how you think, and I would be ashamed to be your daughter!!
This isnt really your choice. Its now your daughters last name. Its their choice not a family choice
I feel like her asking you was kind of a politeness thing and your opinion on a grown mans choices arenāt up to anyone else who even cares lol itās just a name
6 Likes
Your grandchildren will have your name how awesome is that, I mean why would you not want that, Iād be like fck yeah take my name so my grandchildrens children and so on carry it, like you said your daughter is the last generation with the name let it live on Otherwise it stops at your daughters generationā¦
4 Likes
this is honestly up to your daughter and her fiancĆ© ā¦. your involvement isnāt required, so Iām not sure what you mean by ālet himā.
10 Likes
You should feel honored. 
7 Likes
Itās not up to you. Seriously.
Its just a name. The only other person to carry on the name would be a son. If you donāt have one, then you should feel honored that he wants your last name.
1 Like
I have had two rare surnames in my life both my maiden and married surname and I am struggling to see why you are having an issue with this.
And itās not YOUR last name is it your family name so welcome this guy into your family or butt out. Donāt be that āmother in lawā people put on a list of petty MILās
4 Likes
If they divorce he goes back to his "maiden " nameā¦
2 Likes
Its just a nameā¦and I wouldnāt even consider asking my mother for her advice. (No offense mom 
) But, it isnāt up to you.
3 Likes
Its your daughters choiceā¦ Soooo
1 Like
You tripping over a name.
Should be honoredā¦at least they asked your feelings on it and didnt just surprise youā¦but i think its up to themā¦i know a few couples where they took the females last nameā¦more things to worry about then a nameā¦
2 Likes
They could both just use his motherās last name. No need to change before the wedding.
So you would rather your daughters ārare surnameā become extinct?
5 Likes
I think that is such an honor. So often women change over to their husbands last name, maybe itās time for a change lol. Donāt over think it.
1 Like
I would be so honored to share my last name!!! Dont go into a marriage thinking about divorce anyway. Thats now how you do it. My sister didnāt want her fatherās last name ( we are half sisters) i let her legally use my maiden last name which is my fatherās. He was qn awesome father and loved so deep and I would be proud that anybody would want his last name. If you donāt let him use yours he can use my fatherās . HUGHES 
there you go buddy .
3 Likes
Fortunately they donāt need your permission. It seems they were doing you a common decency and letting you know. Accept this young man as part of your family and move on.
1 Like
my daughters kids had her name so when she married her hubby changed his name to hers why not
Poor fella, if he has no close family, you guys are his family now bless him!
Iād be honored too so why be the mil that everyone hates cause your last name is the last around have him carry the legacy plus it isnāt up to you. Your not marring him your daughter is and if you truly like him then accept it and be happy about.
2 Likes
Honestly it doesnāt matter how you feel. They can take your feelings into consideration as a courtesy. Hes an adult. He can change his name to anything he wants. Unless you have a legit legal reason the judge will grant the name change. Besides the name belongs to your daughter too. She has the right to give it to her husband.
I personally would be honored. My bigger concern here is you are already thinking that their relationship wonāt last.
8 Likes
He xan do what he wantsā¦
2 Likes
At the end of the day, a name is just a bunch of random letters. Let him and if they ever break up then he can change it again.
2 Likes
You arenāt very supportive then and to claim you all āreally like him.ā Is a lie. Because if you did āreally like himā you wouldnāt be talking about divorce already and being this negative. Itās not up to you so donāt put an opinion in when itās not even about you.
3 Likes
God I could only wish my current boyfriend would take my name if we got married. Lol I see nothing wrong here. Itās a sign he feels close to you.
This whole post is stupid.
4 Likes
It really isnāt a big deal. Both of my children have my maiden name. Iām remarried now and I took my husbands last name and my step daughter has his last name as well. Consider it an honor that heād rather carry on your family name, give them your blessing either way, and move on about your day. If your last name is that rare then itās a good thing that they will all have it.
Wow, poor kid! It must have taken a lot for him at man up and ask for this. Yes, he could upon marriage have the last name changed to his motherās last name but as heās becoming a part of āYourā family heās asking you to also share your name. If you have an issue then let it be known but dang all he wants is family here. Iām sure when you were getting married you felt the same way.
How about putting yourself in his shoes for a moment. If someone asked this of me; Iād accept it in a heartbeat.
No way would I let him take your last name !!
Its not your decision lol
2 Likes
God forbid someone get the last name as you!! Selfish! You should welcome him name and all!
1 Like
If my husband ever took my maiden name, my mom wouldāve been in tears of joy.
What a blessing it is he loves your daughter, to take the name.
1 Like
Not much you can do about it š¤·
We were totally honored when my son in law took our name , he too has no relationship with his father .
1 Like
Honestly at the end of the day its not ur choice. He can do as he pleases!
3 Likes
If they have a marriage license theyāve already decided what married last name theyāll have.
Iām so confused. Fancy assuming they could get divorced before they even get married. I would love to know what the fantastic last name is
6 Likes