I have a question…my ex and I divorced after three years of marriage. He has three other children (one I didn’t know about until after the divorce because he didn’t bother to tell me) his other daughter that I knew of as my mom watched her when she was little (who he doesn’t have a relationship with) and his son, who I met when we started dating. His son and I have a relationship, especially after the divorce. Son sees me like family and the mother of his brother, with total respect. Here’s the issue. Said son is 23 and wants to visit his brother while he is at my house. Not only to see his baby brother but my children as well ( and me). My ex is adamant that I cannot have his older son to my house. That I am stepping out of bounds. What if his oldest wants to visit his little brother, it has to be at his house. The oldest son doesn’t want to visit his dads due to his (dad) negativity about life in general. Ex says I am not respectful of his wishes by allowing my son to come to my home. Am I in the wrong? Should I just face the wrath and let this wonderful young man that I consider family stays at my house? And when I say wrath, I mean it to every extent of the word.
His son is an adult and can do what he wants.
Your ex is jusy trying to control you and thats gross. Id ignore him. Let his eldest come visit. Spend time with his brother and well, family.
I would let him come.
Said son is 23? A grown man can do as he pleases. He needs to tell dad to step off.
If he’s 23 he can make his own decisions, and so can you. Don’t let him try to control you.
His son is an adult and can decide for himself. Don’t even tell his dad, its not his business.
His son is an adult. Who pays your bills? Your ex has no say 🤷
The son is 23 and an adult. He can make his own decisions and if his dad has an issue then he needs to talk to him, not you.
Pretty sure his 23 year old son can make that decision for himself and what happens in your home is none of your exes business anymore, period. Enjoy the heck out of that positive relationship.
His son is 23 he can see who he likes your ex cant stop him if he wants to see you and his little brother at your place its his choice i wouldnt bother telling your ex or even speaking to him as its none of his business
He is 23 he can do what he wants.
None of his business his son is a adult
The son is 23, an adult. Why should his dad dictate his moves. Pffffft move over dingdong the kids want to visit each other with or without your permission! Pffft. You live your life how you want, you don’t need his permission. Just because he has control issues does not mean those kids have to miss out making memories with each other. Let them visit. Live your life. <3
Tell your ex to f**k off. He doesn’t control you or his adult son or your house for that matter. He doesn’t get an opinion.
Sure. Why not? He’s an adult.
Old enough to please himself your relationship end with the farther not the child
Your are a grown women. You are not with this man and his kid is 23 (also a grown man) you do whatever is most comfortable to you if that means tge boy comes to your house then so be it
Not his house not his business
Yeah the ex can go take a flying leap off a small hill 
the son is 23 he can do what he wants when he wants. The ex has no say on who can or can’t come to your house to visit.
The son is an adult and that’s your house. Don’t give into his bad behavior.
Umm he’s 23 he’s not a child anymore and can do as he pleases it’s not up to his dad… where he goes,who he sees nothing at all…
It’s none of his business
Your house, your life, your rules. Not to mention the son is a grown ass man. Tell the ex to kick rocks and then radio silence.
Hes 23. That should be your answer.
… if the child in question that wants to visit you and his siblings is 23… then sperm donor mcpooper has zero say. It’s between adults
How son is a adult and can do what he wants . You are not married to his father anymore so you can do whatever you want . Sounds like ex is a bitter man
Pretty silly question considering ya’ll are adults. If he wants to visit you and his brother and you are ok with that. Who else matters really??? Screw your ex hubby!!!
Your ex sounds like a pos. None of his business
Sounds like this young man could use another good influence in his life. He chose you. Since you already consider him family, it shouldn’t be too hard to welcome him into your home.
Not the ex’s business, let that baby be with his family
Let the wrath come. The young man clearly knows what he wants and knows his dad is miserable. He just wants to see his family that he knows he loves and is safe.
Wow! You’re are just asking for all the drama! You need to grow up!
He’s an adult, you can be friends. The X has 0 say in what another adult does.
Let him stay. It is amazing he still sees you as family. Your ex has a problem. I think it is wrong for your ex to do that
Nurture the sibling relationship. F the ex, his feelings no longer exist. 
Why do you even discuss it with him?
At 23 the son is an adult! If he wants a relationship with his younger brother then that’s between you, him, and your child. Your ex has no say in this matter. The older son sounds like a positive role model which is more than I’m getting about your ex!!
wow the only time i would stop him from visiting is if his younger siblings didn’t want contact as he is an adult it really doesn’t have anything to with your ex unless he is saying he is unsafe to be round the young ones
I am a firm believer that siblings deserve to have a relationship… and being that big brother is an adult … he can make his own decisions. It’s honestly not even bio dads business at this point . If he is asking for a relationship with his sibling I would allow it .
Ummm why not have a bond? You shouldn’t be asking yourself this question! You know the right thing to do:)
Ma’am that is not a child thats a young man dad has no say even if he doesn’t hang out at the house it could simply be him picking up his little brother
He’s 23 and yall are divorced. Talking about wrath
He is an adult, this is where communication would be a huge factor… the child needs to fully understand the consequences of his choices. Going against his fathers wishing could cause a diversion between him and his father.
My guess would be, he hasn’t had anyone to explain the possible outcome to him, judging from his fathers behavior and the way he handles situations.
It’s your house. And he is an adult. You ex has zero say.
Why is he even having a say, do what tf you want and if his son wants to visit who cares
fuck what he says
Don’t tell him. 
my daughters dad has another daughter that is an adult now. Half the time she comes to town she just wants to see her sister. So she comes to my house to visit her or picks her up to go hang out for a while. We just don’t mention it to dad. If little sis says something to him, I won’t lie, but that hasn’t happened and we’ve been doing this for about 5 years now.
My (old) step mother and father divorced when I was 18. I have a family of my own now. She’s still my step mother no matter what as they began dating when I was 9. I don’t think it’s out of bounds at all. I think the father is insecure and that is absolutely not your problem. If my partner and I were to separate - I hope he would support my relationship with his children since I am the mother of their sibling
I say the father needs to Stop the B.S. regardless of what is up with the adults let the kids have a relationship with the parents unless one starts to try to prevent the other from checking on minors however that’s not the case here so that dad needs to stop treating everyone like this and accept that the kids want to all have a relationship with each other and if he’s causing trouble go to the police and document everyone trouble with him and show the police and also try to do your best to not ingage him either try to always calm the situation down and that but always document everything and go to the police but at the end of the Day keep the relationship with them kids and end it with him and let him learn from his mistakes and tell him they want to be here because of this well not to him but to police when they ask
None of his business, carry on and let the kids have fun.
The young man is an adult. He’s just doing what feels wonderful to him! Let it be! Dad needs to step back!
I don’t see anything wrong with that. He’s family and will be forever. He’s not your boss do what you want to do
Ummm. You’re an adult, the son is 23, he can go to your house if he wants. He doesn’t have to see his dad if he doesn’t want to. Sounds like dad is trying to force a relationship with his son that wants nothing to do with him. Don’t support your exes choice. He’s being manipulative. Tell him to fucking suck it and let your bonus son come over still.
If you are posing the question here, you must be having some reservations. While your ex has no authority whatsoever over his adult son, he does have rights and responsibilities regarding his and your minor son.
If there is any chance at all of a romantic relationship developing between you and this young man (or if not, but his father or others might start suspecting or falsely accuse you of it anyway), that could end up opening a big can of worms, maybe even a custody battle with your ex, and other problems you really don’t want in your or your son’s lives.
I would make sure he sees his little brother somewhere besides your home, if you and he are the only adults there. (If he doesn’t feel comfortable going to his Dad’s to see his little brother, perhaps another family member’s house or somewhere neutral, with other adults around).
He is an adult. Your ex has no as you are not together anymore. Siblings should be allowed to know each other. The only time I wouldn’t allow it is if the older sibling could be a potential danger or the younger ones didn’t want the relationship. Do it. He’s just trying to be controlling.
Fuck the ex…continue to do what is best for that young man and your children
His sons an adult it shouldn’t matter and that is his brother he’s seeing
If his son is 23 he is an adult and able to make decisions. And you as well are an adult and able to make your own decisions. If you have a good relationship with him and he wants to see his brother, why not?
Ummm he’s 23 and can make his own decisions … hell yes let him visit ! I think that’s awesome !
I don’t think you’re doing anything wrong at all. If you have a relationship and consider each other family, what are you doing wrong? You would allow anyone else that you see in this manner the same exact way. Your ex is being very childish and he needs to reevaluate the way he reacts to situations.
That boy is a man, 23, you are his FAMILY!!! I say let him come over and be with the loving family whom he obviously loves, including the new little kids! Great big brothers are always special even if there’s no blood relation!
My ex is an absolute waste of space. Doesn’t see our son. But I am in touch with my ex step sons mum - he’s only 9 - and we keep the boys in touch!!
The son is 23 years old so your ex has NO say what his 23 yr old son can do. No you’re not wrong either. Seems like your ex just wants to control everything.
Have him over with welcoming arms. Your ex can suck one
Umm the son is an adult he doesn’t need his fathers permission
He’s 23 it’s not your ex’s business what he does 
The son is an adult, and can make his own decisions, including whether to visit his brother at your house or the dads. Your ex has no say. At all.
You’re paying your own house and he has zero say so. The grown young man has every right to want and have a relationship with both you and his brother!
It fine nothing wrong with it
Son is 23 follow your heart 
. God bought him to you for a reason.
If everything is cool with u & him let him visit but remember older boys have crushes on their stepmom some think it’s cute but it’s serious with them
If the son is 23, he just needs to stfu.
Once a bonus baby always a bonus baby, should the “child” or full grown adult in this situation, want the relationship.
My son’s father and I were never married and he no longer has a relationship with our son however my son’s older sisters mom and I have formed a friendship and I frequently have her over to spend time with us. She is 13. It does tick her father off from my understanding but she’s explained to him it’s not his call for the fact that he’s not a consistent figure in her life.
They’re humans and get to make their own choices no matter what us parents think, his Dad isn’t except from that.
I have kept my oldest son in touch with his brothers even though his dad and I are no longer together. My son is only 4 so me and the mothers are all in touch and talk. In your situation the exs son is a 23 year old man and can do what he wants and you dont have to listen to your ex.
Simply dont tell him. Its none of his business who is in your home as its none of yours who is in his now.
The man is 23 years old and wants family ties. Not many 23year olds give a sh!t. I think its great he wants to be involved. Its the fathers fault he’s missing out on these moments.
Tell the young man you are more than happy for him to come visit at your home. Be up front with him about his father not being happy about it but reassure the son that he is an adult and in control of his own life and he will always be a part of yours
If the son in question is 23, your ex can’t dictate what he does. He’s an adult and can do as he pleases. If your ex has an issue with that, he can pick that up with his son.
Yes… I did it. I don’t regret a single bit of it. The ex disliked me anyways did it really matter. All he can do is hate you more. His loss.
Maybe don’t tell him anything else. You could even move dates around just so he doesn’t welcome him self
I don’t see the issue said son is an adult and dad no longer makes the choices for his son if dad don’t like it yo fuckin bad he has to deal
You and your ex aren’t together so why would he have the right to tell you what you can and can not do? If it is your ex’s son’s idea to see his brother then that is HIS decision! Which he is clearly OLD ENOUGH to make! Also if your ex’s son want nothing to do with his father then why did you even bring it up to your ex? The son wants to be in your guy’s life! LET HIM who cares what the ex thinks, he’s an ex for a reason!
He’s 23 yr old man who can make his own choses his dad has no say in the matter. Not letting him visit would discourage his relationship with his brother.
His son is an adult he can I have a relationship with u if he wants. My mom and stepdad broke up after over 15 years and my step brother comes in town and visits my mom still
23 ? Nah he’s an adult who can make his own decisions and if he wants to see his family (you included) he can do so and the ex can’t say anything or do anything!
His son is an adult, tell the father to act like a grown up and be mature. 
He’s 23 he doesn’t need permission from his father and you don’t need permission from his father. He has every right to see his brother and you if he wants.
No there is nothing wrong with that at all
Hes 23 he can do what he wants. His dad shouldn’t have a say
Your ex has no say over you or your guests as long as your shared child is not at risk for harm
You do whatever you want to do. He is trying to control you and it’s none of his business anymore. You can have who you want in your home and he can’t do shit about it lol. That’s why he’s so mad lol. He is losing control of you
If he gets to showing his ass then you call the cops PERIOD!!! You have to show him that you mean business and put your foot down. The only thing that he should be concerned about is his son. That is your son’s brother and as long as he is not abusing your son or putting him in any danger then your ex has no say in who you allow around your son or into your home. And besides, he is a grown man and does not need to get daddy’s approval to spend time with his brother. I can see it now. Your ex taking you to court and trying to explain to the judge that he doesn’t want his oldest son to spend time with his youngest son LMAO. The judge is gonna think he’s being pranked or the judge might tear him a new asshole for waiting his time and putting you through so much drama. Girl I swear these men nowadays still think they can hoop and holler till they get their way, like a 5 year old. You move on with your life and I hope that you will decide to let the brothers spend time together and I also pray that if your ex does try to show off and disrupt your peace that you don’t let it slide because if you don’t put a stop to it the very first time it will only get worse. You are responsible for you and your sons peace and happiness and if your son enjoys hanging out with his big brother then you are doing the right thing. Please keep us updated on how it goes. Take care mama
The 23 year old is an adult! The ex is a child! Haters gonna hate!
My former daughter in law babysits for my current daughter in laws other kids sometimes. It’s great and good for the kids
Lol he’s grown you’re the mom of his siblings so he can visit if he wants to
I agree with everyone else. It’s your house, as long as older brother not a negative influence on your son. Let them have a relationship.
As for the EX wrath: emails, text messages, social media & video is all admissible in court. File a harrassment suite/ restraining order on him. Don’t let him run you life!
You divorce each other not the kids.
I say let him come visit.
No keep,yur relationship. He is 23 old enough to,choose!
You divorced him, not his family
His son is an adult now and he can make his own decisions. You have a loving relationship with the son and that’s none of your ex’s business. You, your son, and the other son are family. The ex sounds jealous about this. Let him be bitter by himself and you three enjoy yourselves at your house!
Sounds like your ex is jealous because you have a relationship with his son and he doesn’t. He should evaluate why he doesn’t and act like an adult. At 23, he’s a grown man and can do as he pleases. It’s your home and you can do as you please.
So what’s right as a mother
Said son is a grown ass man and it’s none of his father’s damn business where he goes and who he sees. Let that young man visit y’all and tell his dad to go straight to hell on a bullet.