Definitely not. I’m I the same boat. My son is 12, his father only sees him a few times a year, he dont pay court ordered child support. I wont even let him stay over night. Now that my son’s older, I allow him to decide if he wants to go or not. He hasn’t wanted to see him in probably about 7-8 months now. I dont really remember the last time he saw his father. Honestly… my son’s better off if that’s the parent he is.
I would not allow this. I would worry that my son would feel uncomfortable around people he really doesn’t know. And havent seen in so long. If he wants to spend time with him then he needs to understand that he has to build a level of trust and a relationship with his son first.
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I think the relationship needs to be there before the father takes the child for any period of time.
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Trust your instinct! Or offer to come with…6 is a little young to be traveling without a person who the child is most comfortable with. Traveling with young children is tough as well you can’t just pick up and go. Offer more time for visits instead?
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No no and no for me let it start slowly
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How old is he is he old enough to make his own decision
Ill say this ask how Long the trip will be date leave and return with times and i would say that if he wants him to go he needs to show up more often like you guys make a planed visits up till the day of trip and if he can show to everyone one or at least most then I’d say yes because those visits are time for his son and him to get to know each other and prove he wants to be in his sons life if that makes sense
Nope I wouldn’t send him
A relationship has to start some where if he want to take him let him go and just check in often.
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I personally wouldn’t allow it. He needs to rebuild the relationship with the child before trying to take the child for an extended period of time to he around people he barely knows. I know my 6 yr old son would freak out.
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I won’t send my child off with strangers .what I would do is tell him that if starts seeing him on a regular basis than he could next year
That sounds sketchy. I would trust your gut instinct.
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Trust yr gut mama, its a no from me
Not the trip he doesn’t have a good enough relationship with a 6yo for him to be gone away from people he trusts. He should build a relationship with the kid first.
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Regular visits then a vaca . If he can’t handle that then he doesn’t need to be a father
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He need to establish a relationship with him again and get the flow of trust then possibly if your son is responding well . He might be his son but his son is a living person not a object just waiting on a shelf for whenever his dad has time .
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Keep him home, don’t let him go like that when he hasn’t been around. You never no what people will do . Keep him safe till you see what dad up too
I’d say he can take a trip with him after he shows he can keep regular visits and form a real bond.
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I would have him rebuild the relationship. Prove he can be reliable and revisit the vacation another time
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Go with him! That way he still has his comfort zone with his momma and can get to know his dad who hopefully will be in his life more often
No… Those regular visits need to be happening for AWHILE before a vacation is considered imo…
No. Absolutely not. I wouldn’t allow anything like that until he’s consistent with visiting your son and you can trust him. That’s your baby. Protect your baby.
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I wouldn’t allowssince he doesn’t even.know him
I wouldn’t send on the vacation, concerns for not coming back. Also he is a stranger to your kid. How scary for him! I would have his dad build a relationship and your trust then a vacation after like a year!
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When my ex chose not to see the girls, then wanted to, we talked about him needing to get to know them via phone calls (he lives a plane ride away…not in the next town). He’s seen them once since then and that was 6 or 8 years ago. They were teens and knew him and his other family.
Hell no. My ex tried to pull that crap because he was going to take my son with no intention of giving him back.
I would need him to start frequent visits Atleast 6 months before the vacation and have all the pick up and drop off times and dates written up and signed so he couldn’t try to keep the kid.
I wouldnt let them go on a trip until a relationship has been established and that you are comfortable with it all
Until his dad is consistent in his life, and they have a relationship, I wouldn’t be comfortable with it.
Nope not till he around him more .he need to get know him more
I would say he has to prove that he wants to be consistent before he thinks that he’s going to take him on a vacation start doing every weekend visits if he can handle that every weekend in one day a week if he can handle that then maybe consider vacation
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Keep him home, please.
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If he doesn’t see him regularly then chances are he’s not going to be comfortable more than a day or two. Don’t feel guilty about it, unless your the reason he doesn’t see him.
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I would say no. I would say, you haven’t really seen eachother and taking him for days with strangers doesn’t feel right therefore, as his mother you say no.
I would be VERY weary of letting him take him on a vacation. Now he does have the right to see him as per court order & that should be it.
Listen to your gut feelings please!
No absolutely no trip. I would do supervised visitation and until there is consistency there is no taking the child anywhere. Protect your child at all cost.
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Absolutely NOT unless you were going too.
I would ask that he see him consistently first. That’s a lot to ask for a little guy considering he’s never around.
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Can’t believe what I’m reading, it’s his dad, let him you both made him!
Children are not weapons and can’t dictate how much time a ‘father’ should have with his child
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You might not get your son back
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No way. Maybe if he was consistent in his life but until then, I wouldn’t.
Depend on of ur son would be ok with going. He he seems unsure I wouldn’t.
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I would tell him to see him regularly before even considering a vacation.
Once he has built a stable, reliable relationship I don’t see why not.
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let him go see if he comes home happy and if he does then let him have him or u will regret it later cause ur son wil hold it agianst u
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Trust your instincts! You’re uneasy about sending your young child away with a stranger. That’s very understandable. For what’s it worth my answer would be no. I’d also be asking for supervised consistent visits with a liscenced social worker or counselor. First of all a trained person can help them form a relationship. (That’s what I would tell the judge along with mentioning that he’s inconsistent. Judges don’t like inconsistent parents.) Second they can more likely detect issues & advocate for your son. a professional is more liable in court. I’d also request it put in writing from a judge that if he misses more than 3 visits in a year visitation is terminated. That’s what I got in my custody agreement. He forfeited all contact by not following through with the agreed upon visits. I’d also request that he be liable for paying for this supervision or at least half.
No he should spend time with him then take time
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Nope nope nope. If he can prove in the next year that he will be more in his life and see him more often then yes I would, but only after he has proven himself.
I would never send my kid with people he barely even knows…even if it is his father.
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I’d ask your son if he wants to go
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Vacation? Not yet. Make him prove he wants to be around first. If he can’t manage that then no
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Don’t do it learn from my mistake please I allowed my son to cross state lines with his bio father at the age of 8 yrs old. Trusting that I’d have my rights as his mother. His father and step mom disappeared with him and I didn’t see him again til two days before his 16th birthday. The police department said that due to me allowing my child to cross state lines there was nothing they could do. My child is 23 now and I’m having to clean up the damage they did to him because they abused him and brainwashed him to believe that I gave him up. Meanwhile they tried to get my parental rights taken away told the state that they lived in that I abandoned him. Then tried to get my husband put in prison for child abuse. After all of that failed my son was placed into state custody and they called me and found out that he was kidnapped. I didn’t have charges pressed because I got my son back but I got back a traumatized child.
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Get a legal agreement for visitation right now. Make it clear about when your child should be back home.
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Solid no, dude cant just be like hay I wana take him for a week after not seeing him for over a year…
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Absolutely not! Always trust your gut
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Wasn’t there just something on the news about this? The child went with his absent father and the father ended up dropping the child at some family’s house (the father’s family). the family watching the child. the child got into the pool and drowned??
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Tell him that you will start with regular visitation and build to a longer period.
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If you don’t a court agreement saying you have custody of him I wouldn’t let him go with him at all
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Eek. Noooo. I personally would not send on vacation
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No no no no no. HELL NO
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Personally, maybe this is the dad TRYING to change and be a better person. Make agreements with the father that you need to FaceTime your son and have open communication .
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I watch wayyyyyyy too much true crime to give my honest opinion as an answer lol. But I think you should follow your gut. If you had to come to a facebook group to make this decision, then I’d say no. Maybe have him start by being present more often first and feel it out.
Vacation? Nopee, does your son even remember him? I’d want them to spend some time together first. & see how they interact and everything. That’s dad by dna only because otherwise he’s a stranger.
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Don’t let him go on vacation yet. He’s too little and I wouldn’t think he’d be comfortable. I would agree to have Dad see him more often.
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Regular visits first, build up to the vacation. I do believe a boy needs his father and if his dad is actually trying to do better than you should let him try… But with caution and at your discretion. Trust your gut!
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I’m going through something like this now. My daughter is 14 and hasn’t seen her father in 9 years. My custody says visitation is at my discretion as well. Her father has just started paying child support a couple years ago and only calls when he feels like it since then. Before that it he didn’t call at all. He is mad at at me right now because he thought he could just come get her and take her to his state to live with him for two months and I said absolutely not. Just because a man pays child support it doesn’t make him a father. Without a constant relationship they don’t even know their child. I told him he can come visit and form a relationship first. If her father made an actual attempt to be in her life I would have no problem.
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No! Maybe he should have reached out months prior and actually started seeing him on a regular basis so both you and your son would be comfortable with it, then maybe.
Trust your gut. I can’t tell you what to do, not one can, but I will tell you the same thing I would tell family, friends, etc. : TRUST. YOUR. GUT.
If he starts being consistent then maybe after a year of that you’ll feel better about letting him go on vacation
Don’t send him. He’s basically a stranger to the child. You don’t send your kids anywhere with a stranger.
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Go with your gut feeling do not second guess yourself it’s crucial 
No dont let him if he hasn’t seen him forever
You answered your own question already. No one is going to say let him go, obvs.
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No way. I wouldn’t let him go… your son hardly knows him.
I’d say he needs to spend time with him prior. And build some form of a bond and get properly acquainted or your son will undoubtedly have a panic attack after a little while. Which isn’t fair for him at all, he’d just be a little ball of stress.
If dad is trying he deserves the chance.
My daughters father is finally making an effort because I told him a long time ago I’d have no problem flying her to him during holidays but not if he’s a stranger to her. Because that’s not fair for her.
Boundaries need to be set and understanding needs to be had.
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No, I wouldn’t let him go.
I wouldn’t allow him to go!
None of my business but if we’re me I would tell him no maybe another time he needs to get a chance to get to know u first and for now get him a little more at a time so gradually ur son will be more convertable
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Follow your gut. If you’re comfortable allowing visits that’s one thing, a trip is a whole other situation. I’d say no.
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DNA or not, he’s still basically a stranger it sounds like.
If he wants to be involved, fantastic. But I would personally ease my child into it and see how that goes rather than jumping into the over night stays/long term visitations and what not.
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If it was me (have a similar absent baby daddy) he would need to prove himself to be present in his life for more.than 5 min before the thought would even cross mind to let him take him on vacation. Good luck, honestly I hope he is being sincere for your kiddos sake (my ex husband wants nothing to do with any of my girls …but unless he wants to be all in he can stay gone …his loss 
)
Nope. Have him start with short frequent visits.
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There needs to be a step up plan. Get to know him first then take him for extended stays. But don’t expect anything from it. I tried this with my ex recently and he was so offended that he said he’d rather not see our children at all if he couldn’t do it on his terms.
Sounds shady. Dad needs to establish a healthy relationship with your son, b4 he can be trusted to plan any “trips” away from your supervision. This is a hard “no” in my opinion.
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I wouldn’t! If your son doesn’t know him that would be so scary for him!
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Tell him to shoot for next year IF he has regular visitation
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No trip. Regular visits once he gets back would be ideal and once there is trust established between you, your son and him then maybe.
No way. I’d tell him try seeing him more before taking him on a vacation
Not no but hell no no way
no way, he can establish a relationship by seeing him regularly first. then a couple years down the track, maybe
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If your son doesn’t really know his father then that would be devastating to the boy. He would be scared
Absolutely not. Not at 6
No he don’t need to go on vacation with him right now… he been absent most of his life and now he wants to take him on vacation… I would start slowly with regular visits
Nope! Just the info in the post puts a knot in my stomach.
No i would not let him go.
No way, no how, keep your baby home with you.
Put it this way. If my 20 month old and 6 week old’s father decides to be a dad . He has to actually put in time and effort . He would also be called by his first name. When he is actually committed and knows them well they can call him dad. I am not gonna get my kid attached to a word used all the time, just for his dad to disappear again. Hell no. He wants it he will work for it 
.
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I wouldnt do the vacation!!! but I’d allow more time slowly increasing over the next year then discuss a vacation.
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Definitely not…you are sending him with a stranger…
I would say…get to know him…
Spend some time with him on a regular basis…to your son he may not even have memories of him…or very few
Yes and no
How far away will they be
Can you go grab him if need be
Will there be other kids
Your son will know you didn’t let him go. Never ever be that parent. But set it up so you/he is comfortable. Even if you have to drive a few hours to go retrieve him after a couple nights. Set it up so that your son will be able to call you and ask to stay longer if he wants. This of course is depending where the location of vacation is. My kids father is a two times a year father. I have never said no and I have always made an effort to make them available. They know he is just a dead beat piece of poo. I never talk poorly about him to the kids, I don’t have too. Kids are smart. Your kiddo will know if you interfere, even if it means going outside your comfort level. What’s important is your kiddos comfort level. As long as he will
Be safe. Let him go if he wants.
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Once trust has been built and a relationship established.
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