Take Charge of your own life. Look for opportunities to help yourself, research the area where you live, talk to people that are in positions to help YOU and guide you to make good decisions for yourself. I Pray you will consider making your own way instead of taking on more responsibility in this relationship when you are struggling to find yourself. You can do this. Look for organizations and people that can help guide you into a life you can build on for your future. It’s nice to have the support of your bf, but It would be BEST to find your own way, then You can make your own decisions from your own knowledge and understanding. You can do this as it sounds like you are a strong person from what you say about taking care of your brothers. Praying for you!
Honestly it doesn’t matter how long you’ve known each other. My ex I knew since childhood became mentally abusive and controlling once I moved in. My bf now and I got pregnant 2 months into dating and moved in 2 months after that. Coming up on 7 years now. Just work on building up a savings safety net once you move out in case something was to happen
Talk to your mom about your current situation and your brothers
I would so no. You want to move in with someone for all the right reasons. Moving in with him now for these reasons could cause more issues later on and then your in a worse position
That’s a tough one. It could work out, it could not. I definitely see the want/need to. Only you can make that call.
If you decide to, don’t get too comfortable! Set yourself up to be able to fly if the situation fails. Put away 15-25% of your pay, this is a “bill” you pay yourself. No excuses!
As far as your siblings, there’s a reason DCS is a thing. At first I was thinking you could go to court to try getting legal guardianship of them…. But, if they are also being abusive of you then let them figure it out for themselves. It isn’t on you at all and to not be appreciated for doing all you can possibly do… they grew up with the same person you did. I started working at 12, and at a legitimize business at 13 (I’m in the US). There are side hustles they can do too to earn money. It isn’t all on you!!
I say no give it more time. Playing house is not like dating.
No don’t do it… it could very well be lesser of the two evils. Look after your siblings and get on your feet.
If your boyfriend can handle all of this. Sounds like you are a giving person. Just make sure he will help and not be someone else to keep care of.
I wouldn’t do it. Not just because you’ve only been seeing him for 4 months but it sounds like you’ll still have to take on the responsibility of your younger siblings, even though it’s not your obligation to do so. If he can help in other ways that’s great, but offering you a place to live and then saying that “he’ll help pay your way as much as he can” is a red flag to me. What happens when he can’t make that payment and you’re out on your ass so to speak. In all honesty I would get cps involved, and I don’t normally jump to that. But you shouldn’t be taking care of your younger siblings while you mom is out doing whatever she’s doing. She is the one that needs to take responsibility for her children, not you. Mental health issues or not. If she needs help they have services to help her. But it’s not your responsibility and I diffently don’t think you should move in with this guy after only 4 months. What happens if you continue to help your siblings in the way that you’ve been and he says he suddenly can’t handle it. You may be in a toxic household now, but that’s on your mother and not you. I really do think you need to get someone else involved. Please don’t move in with this guy yet.
I met my husband in August and moved in with him in October. We’ve been happily married for 10 years now. When you know, you know.
You should watch Gracies Choice.
It was a lifetime movie
I’m sure you can look it up. It’s a real story
And I moved in with a guy maybe two months after I met him. Married him 8 months later.
We will be celebrating 4 years in August
Well it’s wrong in the eyes of God yo live together. U do need a life for yourself.but you dont go from one bad situation to another. I’d make sure brothers were ok. With father grandparents etc. They cant help themselves don’t sound like mom will support them. This will be devastating. For them. Call Child protection service’s. Sorry for your dilemma
I moved in with my now husband after a couple weeks due to housing issues and we’ve now been together for four years
In my opinion you have enough on your plate right now get through that and give it a little bit more time try to be patient in the long run you’ll thank yourself for it!
Sounds like a decent guy. Give it a go!!
Put yourself first. You deserve it and that’s how you become the best to everyone else. Goodluck 
I knew my husband seven years prior, but we were only dating 2 months before I moved in with him for a similar situation. We’ve been married for 3 years now. There’s no right answer for this, I’d suggest making a list of pros and cons.
As much as I wish for you to be able to get out of your current situation, I don’t know about trusting somebody you met just 4 months ago. People change once they get into the “move in together” stage. I would wait at least a few more months and save up as much money as you can for a backup plan in case something goes wrong when you move in and you have to get out fast.
Do not do it ! Don’t jump out of the fire and into the frying pan ! You never know what you’d be getting into !
Do what feels right but definitely call child services
Not being rude but, if you have to ask strangers on Facebook if you would be dumb to do so, chances are it isn’t the right time. Yes, the situation you in is crappy BUT you have a roof over your head. Yes, people move quickly and happily together and even married years later but again, if you questioning it…chances are this isn’t the time to do so. Please be patient, give it more time and you will know instinctively if the time is right with this particular person.
Too soon to move in with your bf but definitely move out of the toxic environment.
Four months is too soon.
Medicaid for all of you (get mom to sign off on it) and get them into therapy and you too. If you get at least temporarily guardianship get food stamps, subsidized housing, whatever’s available. Or be a foster parent to them & get funds from that.
Get your mom to give you money for taking care of the boys. Do family stuff with them, indoors if they might run off, like bowling, swimming, indoor climbing walls. If they’d stick with you, free stuff like hiking, park walks where you give them things to look for (squirrels, mushrooms, a color, birds, nests, flowers—you can give one thing for everyone or each a separate thing). Go to parades, festivals, concerts in the park. Take them to a religious institution and have the minister talk to them about how lucky they are to have you and why they need to respect you. Spirituality might be a comfort to you all, and if you get them all in whatever Sunday School programs there are, you get a break while they are there.
Contact the schools to see what help they can offer.
Serve meat more as a garnish to save money, or go vegetarian entirely. Tofu, eggs, plain yoghurt and quinoa are all good, cheap sources of protein.
You should look into income based housing for yourself…sounds like you really should find a different option then where your at but moving in with a new boyfriend might not be the best option. Maybe even find a female roommate so you can afford to get out of the current situation.
l get paid over $110 per hour working from home. l never thought I’d be able to do it but my buddy makes over $15810 a month doing this and she convinced me to try. The possibility with this is endless.
Details HERE…https://Dollarmagic79.surge.sh
My husband moved in 4 days after meeting married 4 months later going to be 27 years in September
No I don’t think it’s a good idea myself but only you know what feels right to you at the end of the day
I knew my husband in high school but we got together 11-29-10 and he moved in with me and my 16month old in december 2010 and we now have 3 kids and have been married almost 12years this year.
Have a back up plan. Ive been married two years to my husband. We got reconnected while i was on vacation and we moved in the next week. He has adopted my daughter after we got married and we now have a son. Just have another place to go- i had a backup.
No!!! Take care of your siblings! Sounds like you are their only hope of some type of normalcy in their life. Don’t show them that running to a man is an option. I know it’s tough but try to stay positive. The abuse is not fair to you by any means. Is there any type of counseling that you and your siblings can attend? Maybe get them involved in church. They may be able to mow yards to help with food or internet. Try to teach them to cook and clean and let them know it is ok to be alone. My heart goes out to you
Trust your gut! I ended up moving in with a boyfriend very quickly back in 2010. We’re married with two kids now. I was 21 at the time.
Only you know what you feel in your heart for him. If you feel it’s time do it
I would say …try to get a room for yourself in a commune …to start off with and take it from there , you need to live by yourself and just be you , before you take the next plunge …and as for your family …they never going to buck up and be responsible if you around to do all that …
I moved in with my boyfriend after 2 months… (Different situation but similar at the same time) been here almost 7 years… It’s not always a bad idea to try something new 
Its way too soon but I understand your situation more than you will ever know…. I work from home with a legit company been with them 3 years if you want more information please inbox me… im a single mom i take care if my 2 with no help with this job it would work well for u
Idk if this will be helpful, but sometimes the signs of abuse don’t always show up right away….at least in what I experienced. I would not advise to move in after only 4 months.
IDK, every time I did that in the past it didn’t end up very well. It takes a lot longer than 4 months to really get to know someone. It works well for some, depending upon how well everyone melds. Sometimes their whole attitude and personality changes, and then you’re stuck until you can find somewhere else to move.
Trust your gut. Everyone’s experience will be different. If it feels right do it! If you have hesitations wait a month; I do think that it’s a very good sign of how much he does care for you that he’s wanting to take this step w you! Wish y’all luck 
Experience has taught me to only do it for the right reasons. I never had continued success in a relationship when I moved in with someone to get out of another situation. It’s the whole out of the frying pan into the fire cliche. Hugs
Every situation is different ,no one can tell you yes or no besides you. My husband and I moved in a few weeks after meeting, married 9 months later. Now almost 20 years later and 3 kids we are still happily married. But it doesn’t always work out that way. Best of luck
I’m in the situation now. I didn’t know beforehand but he’s an alcoholic. He just went into rehab for the second time on Friday since I moved in July. DON’T DO IT!
I moved in with my now husband after a month and a half. We have been together 10 years this fall and have been married 7 years this July!
Don’t think it would be a good idea right yet but I wish you all the luck prayers
Do you have feelings for your boyfriend? If no feelings (not talking about love but the feeling leading up to love) don’t move in. If you genuinely like the guy and can see yourself moving forward with him then yes. Don’t do it to escape a bad situation
I moved in with my bf the first night I ever went to his apartment. We now have our own home almost 5 years later.
Honestly its not your responsibility to take care of your siblings. You deserve your own life. Either your mom needs to step up or get CPS involved. I love my siblings but they aren’t your children. Maybe try staying the nite at the BF house before y’all move in together.
I left my abusive husband and moved on with my bff. Never moved out, and we just celebrated 36 years of marriage. Not too soon
No I think you will be getting into one situation to another your siblings need you right now. The guy can Wait
Do what feels right to you. I moved in with my boyfriend after dating for 3 months… here we are SEVEN years later married with two precious kiddos. Taking that jump is scary! But it can be so rewarding.
Me and my fiance of 8 years moved in together 2 months into our relationship. We defintley love each other and are doing amazing now that we are older. But we were also young and still trying to figure ourselves out. It turned out okay for me thank God but in my opinion just wait as long as you can, it was very rough for us after the first year together
It would be tempting for sure but my big concern is that I have read that guys that like to step in and help like that are often the ones that are controlling in the end. It very might be the one in a million that isn’t but don’t think l would risk it.
Good luck to you on your life and the very best wishes!
Don’t let your present situation decide what to do. Lack of respect from your brother’s is unacceptable but expected due to the circumstances. Get all of y into counseling. Go to the housing authority and see about housing for y and your brother’s. There is help out there for you. Don’t settle for a quick fix that may not be a right fit depend only on yourself.
No stay for your brothers.
Don’t move in with him hun
Not yet
If your finding it hard with looking after your family perhaps talk to DCP
I would personally it dosent have to be forever
Take it from me. I’ve made this mistake time after time. Don’t move in with someone right away. I am 30 with 3 kids and I’ve had to move 4 times in 5 years because of some stupid boyfriend. Stay where you are and get stable and keep your own place until you’re married
I moved in with my hubby after a few months as well. We’ve been together for 12 years! 
Do what you feel feels right.
NO NO NO NO NO… stay for yourself…
If it doesn’t work out, you can always move out. Life is about taking chances !
If you are having to ask I would say no.
Why doesn’t your boyfriend help more with your brothers? If he’s willing to remove you from the situation, what’s wrong with him stepping up to help you more with the situation?
This seems a little suspect to me.
As for your brothers, they need outside help, they aren’t yours to be handling all alone.
But if this guy is willing to help so much with you, then he should be able to help with you right there.
He sees you with your family and wants you for what you can do for him and buddies(maid) don’t trade one for another and don’t leave your brothers,sounds like you keep the family together,if he cares he will stick around
Don’t move but start putting your foot down with your family. If you are being forced to run the household, then RUN that shyt!
It can’t be any worse than the situation you’re currently in.
Get help for your brothers from an outside source this is too much on your sanity! There are agencies that could help
So…he wants you to move from one place where you’re struggling to another where you can struggle too? This doesn’t benefit you or change your situation much, other than you’re out of your mother’s house. And the best he can say is, “ill help you out where I can.” Girl, no. 1) 4 months is too soon. His heart may be in the right place, or at least he’s SAYING the right things, but until that’s followed up with action, dont act on it. Actions speak louder than words.
2) if he’s got roommates, you’ll be taking care of ALLLLLL of them, boyfriend and roommates on top of everything else. If y’all had your own place together only, I’d say go for it. But the fact that it’s him and roommates tells me he’s not in a financial place to help you, he’s looking out for him and his buddies and the help you’d do with rent.
If abuse and neglect are going on at home, you need to report it. Your siblings are your moms responsibility, and if she’s not taking care of them or abusing/ neglecting them, report it to cps immediately. Then see what you can do to get custody taken from your mom. Document EVERYTHING. Every day she’s not home. Every. Little. Thing. There is legal aid for lawyers and so many other aid programs out there for help if you take the initiative and get custody of your siblings. But the first step is being brave enough to say enough is enough and ACT.
I wouldn’t move in with no one that short time you have a hold life hold out for love and a forever before that
Nope
Stay Strong and maintain your OWN home !
I don’t think moving in with him will remedy the real issue, which is the responsibilities your mom has heaped upon you. Honestly, I’d talk to a lawyer and see what the options are for emancipation/custody. The courts may well force her to support her own children if it comes to light she’s neglecting her kids. You need to have choices that are not made under duress.
Nope not at all, you don’t even know who he is in 4 months. That’s great some work out like that but most end up on the 1st 48 or snapped. Just saying don’t let yourself be another statistic. You are my daughter’s age and I would tell her the same but with swear words sprinkled all through it. I’ve been there done that, I was with a man for 2 years, I almost died, thankfully I don’t have a problem fighting back. This happened 5 years ago, I lived because I’m so stubborn and strong willed but I have an aneurysm in my carotid artery the size of the whole left side of my neck. My entire way or things I can do is completely altered now because of it. I was medically retired at age 39 but refused to quit. I’m 43 now I say that to say this. At 20 something, life hasn’t taught you what you really need to know in life. Wisdom. Because I’ll tell you I’m no stupid woman, I talk very very little but I listen and notice every single thing about a person, nothing at all gets passed me. This one did. This man played this part so smooth and trust me, I’m waiting for the slip up, the one little minute thing that sends the flags up, I’ve been right about everyone I’ve encountered up until him. The only split second I seen it was right before the fight began and I was in the hallway unfortunately, the only place in my home that doesn’t have some some sort of defense tool scattered about. I couldn’t act quick enough. He’s not rescuing you from your situation. No one can but yourself and thats the problem here.
I have a different opinion than most are stating. Maybe he’s a great man that wants better for you? Maybe he knows all your doing is not your responsibility & wants to actually help you out of that situation. Maybe he cares about you. There are many instances where a man will help a woman off her feet & support her to get to a better place in life. He is seeing all the stress you have & doesn’t want that for you. I highly doubt he wants you as his maid. Your brothers are not your responsibility, but as a sister I would make sure they’ll be okay with you gone. I would still check in & you should deff look into getting them help…it is unfair to them. Your mother needs to step up. You have to take care of yourself and this could turn into something great for you. Your whole life you’ve been taken advantage of, and sometimes it’s time to put you first. You deserve to be happy. If you aren’t ready, wait a certain amount of time before moving in with him while making plans & looking forward to it. You know in your heart what is best!
I would say no. It seems a little odd to me that after 4 months he’s ready to “take care of you” that screams going from one abusive situation to another. Sure he hasn’t shown any abuse yet, but I have a feeling it will show up several months after you move in with him. He’s already showing he wants you away from them, which starts the ground work for an abusive and controlling relationship. Stay where you are. Put your foot down with your mom, tell your siblings to respect you, or you won’t help them anymore. In fact, maybe call CPS on your mom for neglect of the younger kids.
What about your brothers?
Break the cycle. It sounds like you’re thinking of leaving one bad situation for another potentially bad one.
Rent a room, find a nice safe place to move into and get away from that frame! I would not move just yet either new new…Good luck
Not a good idea. If he’s playing on the fact that you won’t see him for HIS type of abusive until you’re moved in, it’s likely you’ll feel like you can’t go back moms and will stay with him. You also don’t know if the roommates can be trusted with your safety. Is cps an option for your siblings? Can you apply for state assistance and/or emancipation? Or see if there’s a local resource for domestic violence/women’s shelters give them a call. They usually have information on housing etc.
No… too soon. You barely know him.
RE: “would I be dumb…?”
Short answer: Yes. Bright side: you’re smart enough to know it. Look for a real man who is willing to make a full commitment to you by offering you the title of “Mrs.”.
Update: And take to heart the advice by Sher Vivi regarding the resources available to you.
how old are you what kind of education do you have , do you use birthcontrol
Why is your now BF living with roommates ? Is he financially staple ? Why does he not move in with you ? Living with more people never works out. Arguments start. Your siblings wouldn’t be able to go with you so what would happen to them ? I say don’t move in with him but if you want him around let him move in with you. He couldn’t control you that much. And you wouldn’t have to find a new place if it didn’t work out. Good luck to you. Your definitely too young to have the stress of the world on your shoulders. I wouldn’t get pregnant though until I seen better in finances and your relationship
Onley if it was just you two no more!
I was in a fine living situation and moved in with my boyfriend after 4 months of knowing him. That was over 7 years ago . He sounds like he really cares for you and if it feels right I think you should go for it.
My parents got together quick. Been together for 34 years.
Moved in with mt bf after 4 months. That was 14 yrs. 2 boys and a girl on the way. Now he’s my husband. You just never know
I wouldn’t do it. Find some girls to move in with and start there if you’d like to move out. Don’t let ANY guy make you feel like you need him to survive.
I don’t think 4 months is long enough to surely know a person. If he isn’t what he says he is then you’re putting yourself in a trap.
No no no. Coming from a toxic home you need to deal with baggage from your upbringing before you start with more.
My husband and I moved in together the day we met 9 years ago. There is no timeframe that says something will work or won’t.
I have been putting myself in that situation for too long. Moving in and all of that. My suggestion is there are income based apartment sometimes near where you live. They will take your income and modify a rent you can afford. This is a step you need to make but not with the boyfriend. Don’t be hasty because of one bad situation and then accidentally rushing yourself into another bad situation.
You want what I call an anchor. A place where you have that is yours and only yours. In case if anything ever falls throuh in your life you always have that to fall back on. Feel free to reach out to me if you would like. I have many tricks that I know to getting on your feet
I had to move in with my boyfriend after only a few months of dating due to some unfortunate changes in my living situation but we were best friends for almost a year before we got together. We started out living with his dad and siblings for about 8 months until we finally got a place of our own. Over a year into our relationship and he’s sitting here as I type this right now:joy:
my point is your boyfriend seems to really care about you and want the best for you, maybe meet his roommates first and start my staying a night or so first then a weekend to see if living with them would make it worth your while. Good luck!
Never depend on another one to take care of you. Don’t start a family if you decide to move in with him. Just take your time.
If , if you do please be on birth control you don’t need more responsibilities right now
If u move in with your boyfriend what about your three brothers your raising?
l get paid over $110 per hour working from home. l never thought I’d be able to do it but my buddy makes over $14863 a month doing this and she convinced me to try. The possibility with this is endless.
Details HERE…https://Dollarmagic134.surge.sh
I moved in with a guy after 2-3 months…that was 10 years ago (still together) and we now have 3 kids 
I’d leave too
My bf and I moved in together as soon as we started dating. He kinda stayed the night and never left 
we are now married. If it feels right, DO IT. 
I moved in with my husband after 2 days, we are on 19 years of marriage now.
You do what you feel is right for you.
By posting here, it’s clear your gut is telling you it’s too fast. There are tons of places to help with food etc for your brothers. I understand it’s hard hun. I lost my brother 19 months ago and I’d give anything to see him.