Should I pursue a relationship with my family friend?

I need opinions. My ex boyfriend and I broke up. We have a two year old together and we’re co parenting pretty well. He calls me when he can because he is a tow truck driver and is always busy.We FaceTime so our daughter can talk to him, we talk about our daughter and little stuff here and there. Well I started talking to a family friend that I have known since I was about 6/7 years old. He’s 12 years older then me ( im 25). Well I have always been around him due to him knowing my uncle and being around him with the car life. He’s met my daughter a few times, she loves seeing him. Well we started talking a month ago. At first it was weird because he’s known me since he was in high school. He had a kid at 17 which she’s all grown up and in college. Well last week, I need some work done on my car and he told me he’d do it and even got the part for me. We both worked on the car together and my daughter was with us asking questions of course. Well he ended up kissing me. I felt like a high school girl about it and amazed that he did that. We finished the car which he took for a test drive, he had a huge smile the whole time. But I was wondering should I move forward with it. My family loves him as is but they don’t know anything about us yet. Him and I talked about it but we’re more deathly afraid of my uncle reaction. My ex boyfriend knows about it and tells me to go slow with it since he is a family friend but wants me to do what’s best for me but mainly our daughter


I say do what makes both of you happy. Maybe it would be best to have your family friend approach your uncle about it or you guys do it together. If he loves you both the way you say he does then I see no reason why you shouldn’t tell him. Regardless of how anyone feels it’s ultimately up to you and your family friend if y’all want to continue to persue a relationship. It’s an added bonus as well that it seems there will be no drama with your child’s father regarding this suitor of yours.

Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. Should I pursue a relationship with my family friend?

I say yes you only live once if he is willing to move forward n it’s this is what u want then go for it!!

Older men are sexy and will treat you good.


It’s your happiness and your daughter’s. If the family can’t be supportive of what makes you happy, they can F off.
Do it girl :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:

  1. Take your time, no need to rush.
  2. The fact that your child’s father is cool about it is a plus.
  3. If you two are afraid to tell your uncle, just slowly start flirting infront of him and see what he says :joy:

I think your ex is giving pretty good advice about it honestly.


If the age gap is your issue don’t let it be one. I tried to talk myself out of my current relationship with my bf (10 yrs older, 36 to my 26) if I didn’t take this leap I would have missed out on the most amazing man I’ve ever met. If your family has your best interests at heart they will be skeptical but will come around eventually


I think if the father of your child supports you I wouldn’t worry about your families reactions. Just make sure you both can agree if it ends that it shouldn’t end his relationship with your family. Just go slow.


My son’s dad is 12 years older than me. I’ve known him since I was 4 and he was a Galt friend as well.
Go for it girl, if you like him then just go for it

Whatever makes you happy. Do it. Others will see you happiness and come around. :blush: We all deserve love.

Go for it!!! Slow of course :blush: how cute

I say go for it. I’ve known my husband 16 yrs. He is 9 yrs. Older than me we’ve only been official almost 3 years…wish I would have listened along time ago. Go for it girl!!!

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This is your life,do what makes YOU happy,life is short :kissing_heart:


Go for it. My husband is 7 years older than me and I’ve known him my entire life, he was one of the neighborhood kids and knew my family before I was even born

Take it slow like your ex said but go for it only though if you feel the will make you and your daughter happy in the long run…

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Why are you concerned about your uncle’s reaction? That you mention him indicates there is more to this family friend than you are letting on.

Honestly it’s early in the relationship, and I’m close enough to my uncle that I’d want his opinion straight away. Then once uncle is settled I’d make it clear slow and careful is the goal, because we are aware of how this can impact others close to us. If needed I’d remind people that I’m an adult, and 12 years isn’t actually that bad between 2 fully grown mature adults.

One day at a time … just take it slowly… sounds like it would be great but just ease in….

I get vibes take it slow watch your daughter if he’s known you since thst young age he’s been looking since you been a young girl and that’s sick

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Yes girl go for it! I took a chance with a guy that is 12 year older then me too and let me tell you it’s the best I was 20 & him 32. He swept me off my feet Now we’ve been together 12 years and have 3 children together. I couldn’t imagine how different my life would be without him :heart::heart: it’s also a plus that your family likes him too

Girl do what makes you happy. If your uncle loves you guys then he will be happy with it - but I’d definitely try to keep it under wraps more or less and make sure it’s not just a phase.

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Take it slow but definitely try bc you don’t want to regret not at least trying

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I think going for it and taking it slow is a great idea! I have butterflies for you lol, it seems like everything is pointing towards it going well…! Follow your intuition and your heart — good luck!


Just do it lol. If it doesn’t work out, make sure there’s no hard feelings so it won’t be weird when he’s hanging out with your family

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Go for it. My husband is ten years older. Tell him you’d like to see him agsin, under one condition, you would pay him for the part and take him to lunch as a thank you. After that, enjoy your time together and his smile.

It’s weird cuz he’s known you since you were little. If it was someone you just met… completely different. I’d steer clear as it creeps me out that you should be more of a ‘niece’ to him… HUGE red flag.


Yes. Take it slow, but honestly age is just a number. Do what makes you happy.


Also curious why you’re so concerned about your uncles reaction. Genuinely though, I’m not one to think there’s something you’re hiding but it seems random and seems like an insignificant reason to pursue bc otherwise it seems like the stars are lining up for it to be worth trying

cant help who you love…take it slow, see where it goes…but never pass up a chance at love…

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awww it sounds like fate. Id go for it. Honestly you only have 1 go around in this world, take those chances!


So when you were 6/7 he was 18/19 as long as this relationship wasn’t a grooming situation or inappropriate before you were an adult there should be no problems. It might take some time to get used to for the uncle but assuming he thinks his friend is a good guy I would think he would be happy about the relationship.

You’re both consenting adults so I can’t see why anyone would have a negative reaction as long as you are both happy. Taking it slow is never a bad idea. I’d go with the flow of things and see what happens. You don’t necessarily have to tell anyone until things get a bit more serious :slightly_smiling_face:

I say yes just take it slow he sounds like a good guy

Take it slow . See where it goes. I wish you the best hun. You deserve to be happy :blush:

One good sign is that your daughter feels good around him. If she didn’t I would think twice. I would take it slow so you and he can be sure and not make it strained when you’re around each other and if all that goes well then your Uncle will have to come around and accept it too. G pod :four_leaf_clover:


What you should do is go with your heart. At the end of the day it doesn’t matter what anyone says.


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Yes take it slow and date and don’t go to bed with him until you’re married.

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Follow your heart, you alone know what’s best for you

I think you guys should go for it…

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Yes do go slow. No need to rush. Just see how it goes. I wouldn’t tell family just yet. See if it works out first.

Your ex is right, and also sounds like a good man.
If you’re happy, it won’t matter what your family thinks. But you need to go slow for the sake of your daughter.


Nope predatory…at one point when i was younger i was talking to a guy who knew me as a young, young girl…nope dont do it predatory behavior. It isnt worth it…he met you at 6 so that means he was like 18??? Naaahh people are creeps that shit is creepy and weird…but you do what you do :woman_shrugging:t5:

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Take it r e a l s l o w

Might ask uncle what he would think. Of y’all having a relationship I done that before but I asked my cousin and my mom and a few other family members.

yes , take this slow


If he’s a good person, go for it.


I would move very slowly and carefully. It’s better to have a family friend than a failed relationship attempt. As for your uncle, don’t color him stupid. He will notice the looks and glances between you. He may know that you’ve talked already. Just don’t rush things and hurt each other. That will make him mad.


I’d have to say go slow. You could wind up losing a good friend if things don’t work out.

Nope, something definitely doesn’t sit right here. A man that knew a female child since they were 6 and he was 18 shouldn’t have a level of sexual attraction to them to pursue. This screams red flags to me personally and I’d leave it.


Start hanging out more with him and your uncle. You’ll both see how it goes then.

Let him take you on a few dates hun, just because he has known you a long time doesn’t mean he gets the milk for free :wink: Find out if you guys share interests outside of just the Family situation. Age does not play a big factor, but sometimes these older Men want to treat you like they ‘know everything’ and you know ‘nothing’…Feel out his intentions.


Listen man my husband is 11 years older but we met when I was an of age adult. There wouldn’t have been an ounce of a spark if we known each other since I was a kid. That just screams somethings wrong.

He is a mature man and he like the fact that you are a meet tenderloin (per say). Keep it real, no time to live in La la land. You have a daughter and you are an adult. Ask questions and keep it real. Make sure he doesn’t just wants his cake and eat it to.

Be careful it can end badly been through this myself and I’m trying to pick the pieces back up just go slowly

If you like him go for it.

Definitely go for it… slowly of course. A friend always makes a better partner my opinion.


I do Not see a big deal with the age she is 25 and he is 37 but I’m not sure if dating someone who has been a family friend is a good idea , your relationship with him can jeopardize his friendship with your uncle .
I think you should have a conversation with your uncle and see how he feels about it ( out of respect ) and as your ex told you … take it slow and do not rush into anything


If you handle it carefully, even if things don’t work out it doesn’t mean the friendship will be ruined. Just communicate and stay respectful of each other. I’m friends with a couple of my exes because we never had super bad fights.


I’d go slow, maybe don’t discuss it with your daughter until the two of you know where it’s going. I wouldn’t hide it from your family, you are 25 and the age gap isnt horrible, plus if he makes you happy. It sounds like you have a great relationship with your ex and that you have a good head on your shoulder. I’d also have a discussion with the man you like about “no hard feelings” if it doesn’t work out.


I’d agree go slow but include your daughter in the activities and see how she feels also.

Idk. I’d ask your uncle first because this could ruin their friendship and put a big crack in where everyone stands in your family. I say go for it personally, but I’d be honest with uncle early before you fall for this guy.


No dates and you already thinking about pursuing a relationship? Creep before you walk. You can start by dating him cautiously and see how it goes.

Take it slow, ride it out and see what happens, don’t force anything to happen. Just let things play them selve out

Your personal life is just that. It’s noones business till you choose to make it their business. There is no need to tell anyone anything till there is actually something to tell. Date him. Get to know him in a girlfriend and boyfriend way not just as a family friend. Take it slow. Keep it to yourself until there is actually something to tell… if you havnt both.decided you want to be in a serious relationship it’s not something anyone needs to know about. Keep it personal so you have the space to explore this without other people’s opinions involved


Go slow but go for it


Go for it. Just take your time dont just jump into a hard relationship.

I love that you are co-parenting so well with your ex you were comfortable enough to talk to him about it and get his advice.

He’s right. Take it slow. Put some feeler comments out there with your other family members about this guy to guage how they’ll handle the news. Maybe a comment on how well he takes care of himself, or how handsome he looks in an outfit.
Find someone you trust in the family to talk to about it and maybe recruit them to be there for support when you talk to your uncle about wanting to persue this person.


If it feels right go for it but take it slow


Be careful who you allow your daughter to fall in love with just incase you don’t work out… I say absolutely give it a go but protect your child’s heart… good luck you deserve it


Go for it but take it slow.

all i have to say - i’m dating someone older- see how much you actually have in common besides just being heads over heels. I guess that goes for any age though :joy:


First of all, I have so much respect for the father! Wow. That’s a real man! But definitely take things slow. If he’s genuine, he will respect that.


Go slow for sure, never force a relationship. But eff them. If you’re happy that’s what matters


Go with your heart but take it slow, I have been there but not with such a nice ex…get to know him again and be friends 1st. Makes for a better long lasting relationship with me anyhow :slight_smile:


Y’all are both consenting adults, it doesn’t matter what anyone else’s opinion is.


I would just be careful. The fact that he was like 20 when y’all met when you were 6 it’s a little weird imo that he would be attracted to you now. I would think he would still see you as that kid you were.


Take it slow and see what happens. Sounds like you both were struck by the bolt when yous kissed. Go for it girl :heart:


Your an adult he is a adult I don’t see a issue if your uncle gets mad oh well he will get over it


Go for it life’s too short to be alone.


Your over 20 there’s nothing wrong with it.

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Go slow and find stuff in common and what Y’all agree on.

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I say why not. But definitely go slow


I applaud the daddy here :heart::heart:


My husband is twelve years older than me, we are heading close to forty five years together, follow your heart, if he’s good to you and your daughter and can get along with your ex, he’s a winner.


You both are grown and do what your heart is telling you. Best to not sneak around and be honest with your family about it. Both need to talk to your uncle and explain everything to him. It’s when people lie and sneak around that angers family the most


If that kiss made you feel all giddy like that, go for it. Life is too short. Take it slow and have fun! He might just be your soul mate… :smiling_face_with_three_hearts::smiling_face_with_three_hearts:


He has a daughter close to your age? He’s known you since you were 6? Something doesn’t seem right here.

Do it girl!! I loved my dad’s friend from 7 years old I’m 28 now sadly he passed away 11ish year ago a cuple months after us dating and still love him to this day!! But go for it

That’s your shot right there beautiful

Absolutely go slow,maybe talk to your closest family and see what they say,but at the end of the day it’s your choice

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it will ruin a good friendship.

Yes go slow, but yes go for it if he makes you happy. Goodluck

Go for it! It could be the love of a lifetime blooming

Take it extremely slow and don’t let your daughter around him at least until you’ve been dating several months. Which is my advice with any man, not just because of his age.
If he pushed that, run.

2 year olds like anyone who seems nice and pays them attention.

You also don’t want her getting attached to him if you guys break up.

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Think about what happens with your family if things don’t work out down the road and break up. Not saying donut go for it, just saying think about how your relationship could change family dynamics and loyalties.

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