If you want to stay involved with them let them know you’re there for them if they need you and you’d love to see them even when they don’t (need you). Let them know that you don’t have to be with their dad to care about or love them.
If you loved them as your own, absolutely.
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You divorce spouses, NOT family. That’s what my step-dad’s family said.
Definitely stay in their lives.
It depends on relationship and how close and old they are
I would stay as involved as I could
Depends on the bond you have with your bonus children.
You divorce a spouse not the kids.
Yes you should - the more love kids can get in this world the better 
My ex-husband has three boys from a previous marriage. He pretty much severed any relationship I had with the boys before the separation took place. It’s hard to just separate yourself especially if you have been actively involved in their lives for years. I think it depends on what you and your spouse decides to do and what kind of communication you can have with them.
Stayed in my step kids lives
Yes be there for the kids !!
When my husband and I got married, he had 5 from his previous marriages (but was only in contact with his oldest daughter) and I had 2 sons - all 3 are in their 20s. When he decided to leave 2.5 years ago he stopped talking not only to my sons (which in particular hurt my 24 yo because he considered him his father) but also to his daughter because she was on my side - even though I asked her not to choose sides. Since then I’ve adopted her just as we had originally planned. His entire family stopped talking to her because we went through with the adoption. No one has heard from him since he walked out the door. I promise her from the day we met that I would never abandon her (her bio mom did when she was 7) and I’ll keep that promise forever. I’m all that she has left for a parent. Breaks my heart every day 
Let the child lead the choice
Only if you have a bond with them
I am friends w my bonus kids moms 
I stay in the life of a ex bf son 
I helped raise my ex husbands firstborn and I still consider him my son and always will. He is involved in all felony activities and visits me every other weekend. That is my son. My boyfriend accepts this as well. My ex husbands girlfriend is also accepting and really doesnt have a choice because I refused to be kicked out of his life. His egg donor isn’t involved and hasn’t been in years and years.
My boyfriend was married before me. His ex wife had 3 children before him and 1 with him. After they divorced he still kept in very close contact with her (ex’s) 3 children. However, once he officially moved on and we started dating, he ended up distancing himself from those 3 kids because they caused an immense amount of problems in our (mine and his) life. He does still talk to them once in a while because they are still his daughters sisters, but they are not close at all anymore due to their own actions. (The other 3 children are adults now).
Thats all on u the kids and the bio parents
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After my dad and his ex wife split she still was a big part of my life. Even at 24 now I can still message and go see her when I’m in the area.
She did help raise me and just bc the relationship with them didn’t work didn’t mean we didn’t have a bond.
My ex step daughter is now my god daughter. She is my daughters half sister and the mother and I understood the need for them to be in each others lives. We divorced when she was 3. She’s now 12 and they have an inseparable bond
It’s been over 20 years and I love my step son more than I did when we were together. In fact I divorced him not his family! I still go to family functions! They were a part of my life before I met him.
When my ex husband and I separated, he dropped my older two like they didn’t even matter. He helped raise them as if they were his own for 5 years and they even called him dad. When he left, it completely crushed my kids. They were so confused and so very heartbroken. He won’t even look their way now, when I drop off our 4 year old, and it’s been almost two years.
I would suggest staying in their lives if you can. If you love them and they love you, definitely make it work somehow.
My former stepdad was only with my mom for 7 years, but it was during an important time of my life, from 9 yrs old to 16 yrs old. He was closer to a real dad than my biological father. I’m 40 now, he’s still in my life, and my kids call him grandpa. They know he’s not biologically related to them, but they love him and he loves them just as much as any biological grandchild.
It usually depends on the situation, as they’re all different. I’d say definitely let them know you still care no matter what. Keep that door open, and discuss with the dad as well, when possible.
You divorce the parent, not the children. Regardless if the child is biologically yours or not
My x husband and I split and we have a daughter together,but my oldest two are mine and he has been their for them since they were 2&4 years old. Now they are 26&24 and he is still their for them…no matter what!
In fact on my oldest daughter wedding two years ago she asked her step dad to walk her down the isle vs having her biological dad.
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If thats what they want then yes. If they dont, move on. In this case it should be up to the kids not the parents.
My parents divorced when I was 5, and both remarried. My dad married my stepmom when I was 6, and they were married for 16 years. Luckily I had a very close relationship (as did my mom, and my dad’s family) with her, and she is/was my children’s grandmother. Unfortunately she passed away last year, and I mourn her loss. Stay close if you can. 
I’ve had 3 children ripped away from me because they weren’t mine. When the oldest one turned 18 4 years ago, she came looking for me, she found me and now I have contact with all 3 kids (now 16, 18, and 22) and their mother! Lol! If you can keep a relationship with the kids, DO IT! If you can’t, wait for them, they will come find you. Kids never forget who was there for them!
I distanced myself from my step kids after we divorced it was a hard decision to make but it benefited my own children while they grew up after my kids grew to be teenagers I told them there step siblings names so they themselves could gain a possible relationship with there 1/2 siblings. My ex husband was abusive so the less he knew about me and our children the better off we all were. Not sure about your current situation but I know for me not having drama was for the best.
I have had my ex bouns kids contact me after years of separation. I tried bio mom would not allow it as they became of age they have slowly started making contact. It warms my heart and theirs. The situation between me and their dad had nothing to do with them. I still consider them mine.
You divorce women/men not kids
I think it depends… how long you were together? how old the children are? how the relationship with the kids was?
I honestly don’t know what I would do because every situation is different. Like are you and the dad civil? Does he stay involved with yours? Would it hurt the kids more or less to stay or leave.
I think you need to evaluate your specific situation and make that decision
I think it just depends. My dad was married to my step mom and I knew them almost all my life they divorced a couple years ago and I still call her my step mom and her daughter I still consider my step sister. Its never going to change. My mom still talks to her ex’s kids even tho her was a piece of shit to her and abusive She is remarried as well but still talks to his kids he just doesn’t know. I don’t consider them step siblings anymore tho I don’t want anything to do with his family.
My dad did just divorced my stepmom and went through this.
All of us kids have gone off to do our own things, but my stepsisters still stay in somewhat contact with us (i.e. the one younger than me just sent her masters graduation announcement to us). We’re also in contact with the bitch’s mom and sisters - her mom and younger sister are actually on my kids’ emergency cards at school as well.
If continuing the relationship with the children is beneficial and healthy for them without causing confusion or issues at home, as long as the parents are on board, you should stay in their lives.
However, if this will cause hurt and confusion, feed into false hopes of reunification, or becomes a weapon against any of the other adults in the equation, it’s time so let go.
The only question that matters is what is best for them, followed very closely by what will be allowed by their parents.
My daughter is still in regular contact with her two stepchildren &her own younger children count them as family.if you have a good connection with stepchildren why drop them.
It’s up to you. The best thing you could do for your step kids is just be a friend to them if you both want to continue to stay in each other’s lives.
Only if they want you too
Seems to me to be more what your ex and the babies mama wants. What you think you should do may be a moot point.
I never been marries but my ex had a daughter from a previous. She was preteen/teen during our relationship. I loved her as my own. After the split i kept my distance for almost a year. Then she got pregnant towards the end of my first pregnancy. We started talking after my baby was born. Im still in contact with her(just not him) just not as present as i was before. I still love her like my own. Im so proud of the woman she has become. Havent heard from/spoken to him in years. Just cuz u n him didnt work doesnt mean u cant still b in contact with the kids. Granted thats if everyone (him included) can b civil about it.
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I have 2 natural children & 2 “step” children(I don’t refer to my SC as anything other than my children) and I don’t ever not want them in my life! I divorced my ex (SC dad) almost 10 years ago and at first I kept my distance, not because I didn’t want to have a relationship with them but because they needed time to emotionally adjust to all the changes happening. I was still available for them should they need me, I still watched over them, and I still worried myself sick with the normal stuff we momma’s worry about. My relationship with them isn’t what it was when they lived in my home but I don’t feel any different about them than I do my natural kiddo’s.
Point is, it depends on how YOU feel regarding yours. If you’re not emotionally attached the way you are with your natural children then you should gracefully bow out. But if doing that hurts your heart then find a way to have a healthy relationship with them.
If you are asking this question, yes you should.
Not those kids fault things fell apart, imagine their hurt over all this, I will always be a part of my ex’s kids and grandchildren, does a separation mean you are no longer part of a family, does a divorce mean your kids are no longer your family, no!
You don’t divorce kids. If something were to happen and my husband and I were to divorce he would still see my son. Hell my husband’s ex (my step kids mom) is a part of my kids lives
My mom married the man I call my dad when I was 10. They separated when n I was 17. I can’t imagine what I would have missed out on if he had nothing to do with us( my sister and I) after my mom and he separated. (He’s my brother’s bio dad). He was my best friend had was there for me anytime I needed fatherly advice. He passed away 14 years ago and I miss him dearly.
Of course if you had a loving relationship with them❤️
Really depends on your own personal situation. If the step parent been in their lives for a significant amount of time and does help provide and spend time then yes.
Always be there for the children.
I have a step daughter that I was in her life from when she was 2 1/2 years old. Her dad and I divorced after 27 years. She has remained in my life and my other children’s lives and we would not have had it any other way. Her children are my grandchildren and we will always be family❤️
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After my mom and step dad got divorced he stayed in our lives. We were already adults(early-mid 20s) but it meant a lot to us. And he is still a pet of our lives. If the step parent is close with the children talk to the parent and see if it even a possibility. You don’t want to take a person out of their lives if it will hurt them.
Not me, but a friend - Mother (M) and father (F) had a child in their late teens and chose not to marry but committed to coparenting. F got married when child was about 4 and he and his wife (W) had another child. Fast forward 10 years and F and W are getting divorced. M, F, and W sit down together to figure out a visitation schedule for both kids. When asked, my friend, M, told me, “Those boys are brothers and my son doesn’t really remember a time when W wasn’t in his life. Why would I ever take that away from him?”
I know this isn’t quite the same situation and that every situation is different but I’d urge you to think about what would benefit the children most and work with the other adults in the equation to make that happen.