Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. Should I take a job after staying home with kids?
Could you babysit other people’s kids? Maybe another 1 year old so your kiddo has a friend and you wouldn’t have to leave.
I personally wouldn’t work that many hours unless I absolutely had too and from what you’ve said you don’t absolutely have too.
I think you should find a job with less hours and take that!
Would the extra price of day care make it worth it to take a full time job
If I could be a stay at home mom again, I would. You have it good. You’re not missing anything. You get to spend all day with your kids. You make it on your fiancé’s income.
I promise being away from your kids 10 hours a day gets old and tiring fast.
Also, you’d probably only make enough to pay for child care anyways. What’s the point?
Enjoy them while they are little. It goes by fast. Time is better than money. I like the idea of babysitting for extra cash.
I’ve done it for 17yrs you can do it.
Stay home. I have with my daughter for four years and it’s time I will never get back. They’re only little once. My daughter starts preschool next week and now it’s time to focus on me and a career. I wouldn’t pay someone else to spend that much time with my child. Good luck
I would say try to find a part time job one that you can do while your fiance is home cause sometimes you’d end up having to pay as much or close to it for child care
I’d stay home. I would always feel like I’m missing out.
I would not work. The litle is is wayyu too litle. Unless you are getting an amazing paying job, you may end up paying way more the babysitter than what you would be getting paid at your job. If u want to make money u can do week end night babysitting for other parents so they can go in a night out. You’ll have a litl3 Xtra income and you will be able to be there for your kids. Being realistic 2 hours to cook n clean n be with yoir kids is nothing because you still need to take a shower take care of yourself. The way you will end up being so burn n tired n the litle money you may have left is not worth it. You won’t ever be able to get this moments back with your children
We were faced with that same question. I stayed home till my kids finished elementary school. We survived on my husband’s paycheck but it was hard. The question you have to ask yourself is the “extra” money you would be bringing in, how much of it will go to pay his babysitter and how much “extra” will you actually have? I wanted to go back to work and contribute too but basically I would be working just to pay a babysitter and have them raise my child. Just my two cents and maybe some things to talk over between you two.
This may be an unpopular opinion. You are living with your fiance. You have no legal rights except for child support should you break up. Yes, this does happen more frequently than many would like to believe. You need to be able to support yourself and your baby should this happen. I see so many mamas asking in this group…what do I do, my husband/fiance/ so just left me. I haven’t worked in years.
Don’t stress yourself. Find something part time and do it on your partners days off.
I do a 38hour week and have since my lo turned one she goes to daycare and loves it, shes learnt so many things and does stuff we wouldn’t normally do at home plus she gets to socialise with other kids which is important.
You gotta work out expenses of childcare and what your left with.
Check out the amount baby sitters cost and see if you would really have extra after payday.
Stay home, maybe try babysitting for other people to bring in some extra money instead
I’ve been a fulltime single mom since day 1 so I’ve never had the choice of staying home
I’m about to have my second child and I am in management and work a lot. I stayed at home the majority of my oldests younger years before he started school and financially we can’t do it without my income now. We lived very tight when I was at home and if we could swing it I would do it again in a heartbeat to have that time with my kids again.
When my kids were young I stayed home and babysat. I made great money babysitting and that way I was with my children. They are grown now and have both thanked me for staying home with them.
I would find part time work to begin with and coordinate your schedule so your fiancé is home with the kiddos while you’re at work and vice versa.
Then when your little one starts school you can start full time.
I would figure something like crafts or blankets etc you can make or sell . I was glad my mom was a sahm home for me and I was also andy daughter thanked me for staying home also
Id give anything to stay home with my babies
I totally felt the same way going back to work. Did it and realized I was working to pay for daycare. I’m so glad I was able to find work at night instead. I didn’t miss out on much, went to work after 9pm came home before 6am, mommy napped until her naps then got the sleep I needed. Didn’t have to work for daycare, got the time I needed to feel included, still able to spend time with hubby. It really is personal choice but if you can find something that checks all the box’s, go for it.
I would stay home with my kids—time goes so quickly and before you know it, they will be grown.
Childhood is so short. Stay home and love on and raise your child. You won’t regret it
Your babies are only little for a blink of your eye. You’ll never get to experience the joy of them being little again. Stay home and teach them your morals and about God
Have you thought of working from home? There are a lot of remote jobs for those with or without a college degree. I’ve been working from home for almost 2 years now and I love it, however my job goes in line with my degree. My kids stay at the house most of the time, but sometimes my mom takes them to hers if I’m having a busy day.
Stay at home . I did - yes it was very tight to say the least but I am so glad I did ! My kids also loved me being there . Time passes so quickly and you’ll be so glad you were there for them . They don’t care about material possessions; they care about your TIME
I would not work, if I could make it on 1 income
Personally I would get something at home part time until he’s a little older. But that’s just because all the horror stories I have heard about daycare in our own personal experience. My daughter is 2.5 and I work from home full time now and have someone come to the home to watch her
I chose to be a stay at home mom until my kids were in school and I would do it all over again! We saw some hard times but we grew and learned… my daughter’s are well educated young women, very independent, productive citizens… It won’t last forever and everything works out in the end…
Stay home or part time
Wait until your youngest starts school. Daycare would take like 70% of my paycheck and what’s the point of working so much for so little?
Everybody is ready to go back to work at different times. You need to look at the big picture of if your actually going to make enough money to go along with the Hassel of it all. Daycare is not cheap, everything has gone up in price, plus the everyday. Is it actually worth what you would be making? My situation was different. I had to work for us to get by and even with me working full-time we barely made it by once I added gas, daycare, and my everyday bills. Does part of me wish I could have been home until they got school age… Yes but I don’t regret going back to work and making sure we are what we needed.
Welcome to my life and other mommas who make it happen. Wish I was lucky to be a stay a home mom but then again I go crazy not working and just staying home.
It’s totally your decision. The cost of daycare is expensive. Maybe a parttime job would be a better start.
Do what’s right for you and your family. If you want to stay home and can do it, do it If you don’t want to stay home, don’t. I’m a 45-55 hour (I guess I don’t even know)
hour working mom. I would be a terrible stay at home mom, I know that about me and my kids are better with me being a working outside of the home momma. My kids love to visit me at my office, have been raised with no clue that men and women have different sex roles in the house (hubby does lots of the house stuff… he’s wonderful!), they know what I do for a living and it works for “my family.” May not work for your family. It’s all about balance. I was blessed to have a great sitter for my kids when they were 6 weeks old. Again this is what worked for us. As a way to be present during the evenings or to attend my kiddos school functions, I often bring work home and complete projects when everyone goes to sleep or before everyone wakes up. It’s all about balance and finding out what works. With that being said, some days are a total roller coaster but it’s our roller coaster.
Girl! Take the time with your Littles! They grow up so fast. I cherish the last 6 years I’ve been able to be with mine.
Do what YOU want
And plus, even if this job isn’t fitting well doesn’t mean another one won’t
If you feel like you need something to keep you “out in the world” and bring in extra income, I would personally go for part time if you can manage. You will miss your babies so so quickly mama.
Find something part time. Enough to get out of the house. No pay won’t be great but too much time me from Children isn’t good either
There’s a lot of remote jobs now where you can work from home, or maybe consider a part time position?
I did until my youngest was 4…I just don’t trust anyone except some family with her. Then I worked out a system to work. It’s part time right now. But I started with a nanny job and part time cleaning homes with my cousin. Then quit the nanny job after 2yrs of dealing with the crazy mother…find something that works with you
And what would babysitter cost. How about childcare in your home, could be a win win.
I would look for something that’s not immediately 10 hours a day 5 days a week. I work 12 hr shifts 4 days a week with a 3 year old and it’s terrible at times. Hes asleep when I take him to my dad’s house in the morning and we spend about an hour together before bed… I wish I didn’t have to work so much but being a single mom with no support has made me have to work those kinds of hours
Depends on how much daycare would cost for both kids because you have to factor in the oldest for when school closes. If most of your check is gonna go to daycare I would say it’s not worth it if you can survive with one income. I have two jobs and serious guilt because I don’t get to spend much time with my kids but I have no other options
I stayed home until my kids were in school. Just don’t trust anyone.
Go part time. I’ve been a sahm for 9 years and it’s hard as hell to jump back in. I’d advise part time to just remain social.
Millions of women go to work everyday. Its not a big deal.
Get a part time job so you wouldn’t be away as much. Then, when the youngest starts school, then find a full time job
why not do child care in ur homew then u wouldnt have to leave him
Find the right work/life balance for you. You could try the job and see how you go.
If you are happy and emotionally healthy being a stay at home mom, keep doing so. Trust me, your child will be grateful.
It was 100% more expensive for me to pay for a babysitter that I trusted. I would have had to PAY to go to work. It wasn’t worth it for me. Now that my daughter is older I am going back. There are many contract/gig jobs like grocery/ food delivery that are more flexible but it really comes down to what you want and what you are comfortable with.
Will the job add something positive to your life? Or will it cause stress for a little bit of extra cash?
Stay home if you can, you can always go back to work later. He will only be little once.
Stay home with the kids.
Maybe find a part time job where you can eventually switch to full time once you both get used to it?
Do part time. And think because daycare would take alot of money. Is it worth it
Look for Mpmmy,s helper at your house help with chores
After 3 years of being a stay at home mom I went back to work when my youngest daughter was 6 months. No regrets. Yes I missed my kids but I was so much more mentally healthy working outside the home. It makes me a better mom.
How about just work part time?
Pdrsonsh I wouldn’t if your money tight and he’s still so young. Daycare is expensive n it dont seem worth it at your son’s age. Get schooling right now certificates for later
School bus/van drivers usually allow you to bring your kids with you.
Can you do computer/remote work and fit it in around nap times & when fiancé is home (also great for insomnia!)? Or answer sales phone lines for retailers during hours when your child is asleep? Not sure how well it pays but might also be slow between calls so you can get other stuff done. Part time, may pay well, keep skills & references for later full-time employment.
If you can afford to stay at home to watch kids,do it.Find work that suits you & your children when they are in full time xxx
I worked full time with that schedule for 3 years with a toddler… I became pregnant this year and quit and am a stay at home mom … it definitely takes a toll on you physically and mentally
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. Should I take a job after staying home with kids?
I love being home with my son. However we are financially comfortable and the choice to work from home was very much my choice.
So you need to do what you think is going to work best for your family.
Some things I would discuss with my partner before going back to full time work if I had been a stay at home mum. You are no longer going to be at home. So all the house work, cooking and parenting etc needs to be rebalanced. (I mean hopefully you guys were working great as a team even when you are at home full time, but even with that the full time career usually assumes more of that burden naturally because you’re available). You need to establish before you go back that you guys are going to need to do things more equally. You do not want to be taking on full time work and being expected to carry your full time home maker role as well. It will burn you out, breed resentment and create a really toxic environment. Discuss the distribution of labour, figure out who is going to do what and when before you go back so that it’s not a shock when you do.
Planning and preparedness is key, likewise clear and constructive communication.
Good luck with your decision, I hope it all works out well for you
I love my kids love being a mum but love my identity too. Having a job allows me to remind myself it’s ok to work, it’s ok to make an income it’s ok if my kids are happy in daycare. The extra money I get goes towards spending time with them on memorable holidays and adventures. Being a stay at home mum is not for me and that’s ok. I don’t need anyone telling me I HAVE to stay home with my children.
If I’m filling my cup their cup is always full. Sounds like you want the job but maybe even more worried about backlash from other mums who prefer to stay home? Anyway me personally a job allows me to feel human, have a warm cuppa, communicate with adults and pee in peace.
Also to add I’d rather be comfortable in life over just scraping by and not being able to go get a treat with them because funds are tight.
It sounds like you aren’t emotionally ready. I would wait a little longer
Plenty of people work full time and put their kids in childcare, it’s not going to harm them in any way. It’s a personal decision really, some people prefer staying home and some people prefer working. I love my job as it gives me something to achieve outside of my family, something personal to me, contact with different people, and I believe time away from your kids and partner is healthy. But not everyone feels that way, it just depends on YOUR feelings x
Fine a part time job instead, if your working full time you’d be paying a lot for childcare, and if your managing on your partners income then yours will be just a bonus X
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. Should I take a job after staying home with kids?
It all really depends on you and your family’s wants and needs. Extra money is always great… but at what cost?
Personally that sounds like way too many hours but that’s just me. I also didn’t like being a sahm very much after about a year and there are so many working moms with great happy kids. Would you have more income with you back and work and your partner staying home?
I think it depends largely on the pay. How much will you be bringing in after daycare costs? If it’s just a small amount then I’d pass. You’d be more useful at home but if it’s a significant amount that will make your lives easier then sure, go back
They’re only little once. You’ll never get this time back. There will be lots of time to make money. I’d stay home and enjoy that little guy for as long as you can.
Sell mary kay! Honestly its a few hours a week on my schedule… it supplements our income!! I’m home… I still get to meet with ladies when the hubby home with the kids it sounds cliche… but I love it
I’m a SAHM and I have to say tough job but I love it. But depends on your happiness too. Are you happy being just a SAHM or do you want to work? What’s your fiance feel? I personally am glad I am a SAHM right now especially with covid going on. But we each have to do what’s right for ourselves.
I would, just because I think it’s always good to have your own money.
You could try to look into something part-time where you would only work during school hours, or a work from home job.
If you have a quiet, professional background, there are a lot of work from home positions right now paying 15 to 17 an hour, and some of the sales ones are paying that for base pay and allowing you to earn much more in commission.
Some of those roles are flexible and allow part-time as well, although it’s not as common with the ones that include a decent base.
Maybe try a job you can bring him with to? I do Instacart with my son so none of the money I make goes to daycare
Try doing something like instacart. Thats what I do. It’s just an extra 100 bucks a week ( I could do more I just don’t) but it gets me out of the house and you can bring your little one with you bc you’re just grocery shopping for people and drop it off, same as you would when you do it for yourself.
Would it be extra money or would it all go to pay for daycare and gas to get to work and back?
I became a single mom. My decision. Dad was on drugs. I have 4 kids. I work full-time, and before COVID had side jobs cleaning houses to make ends meet.
I feel bad for working as much as I have to. I even recently had my oldest son call me an absent parent like his dad because I’m away from home so much.
I don’t have a choice.
It’s good to give your kids some time away from you, but if I didn’t have to, I wouldn’t work so much.
Just a part-time income can help your family, give your kids a different environment for awhile, and allow you to be you and not just “mom.”
Work at the daycare center with him. Same hours and you’ll get a discount for childcare.
Stay home if you can. The time goes by so fast! You could always go back when he starts Kindergarten.
See if your local school district is hiring for anything!! You still have a little extra income, but you’re not putting in too hours away from your kiddos
I mean, it really depends on YOU. Do you WANT to work? There is no right answer. I personally love working (I am in IT and make decent money) and it’s just always been the place for me, as much of a love my little man and the time we do have together. But evening are hectic and more so as you get into sports and extra curricular activities. We have to be more flexible on the bedtime and not as many family meals as I would like. Good luck, it’s not easy. Consider the pros and cons of your options!
I honestly think staying home is probably better because there’s really not going to be any extra money because it’s all going to go to childcare anyways
I personally am in your position and chose to stay home with my babies because to me this time is some thing I cannot get back and by the time we paid a babysitter it wasn’t really worth me being back at work, especially since I would have missed so much time with the kids. It’s all about looking at what you want and how you want to prioritize your time. If going back to work and having that extra income fulfills your needs, do it! If not, what is 2-3 more years at home with your baby while your husband is the sole source of income. Sending hugs mama whatever choice you make your babies will know how loved they are and be grateful for what you’ve done
Personally I tried to stay home until they were between 2-3.
My SIL had her babies and went back to work not even a week after having each child (they have 3 kids)
So it really is based on your preference. However, if you are generally a social person, getting back to work is a great thing. It really can improve mental health and give you confidence. It gives an outlet for ‘you’ time and a way to do something to contribute. I live my kids, but I love being at work too. My mind needs the challenges work brings.
There are benefits to either choice. But please don’t feel guilty, no matter what you choose. Money will always be there. Your child’s early years will not. On the flip side, daycare can be awesome for kids to socialize and have their own routine that involves people besides mom and dad. Be sure the decision you make is the best for you and for your child. No one else matters.
I would not and did not.even we struggle for money at the beginning of our marriage when our kids were young…we made do… when my kids went to kindergarten I took in two other kindergarteners who were friends of theirs and watch them until 5:00. Now my children are 36 and 38 and they always tell me how much they appreciated knowing they were going to come home to their own home with their own stuff. Just my humble opinion. Good luck
We were in the same boat. However, DH is military and deploys a lot. We opted for me to stay at home. Kids have weird hours at school, my youngest is home at 2pm, the two oldest don’t go until 930. So right now I’m making sure the house is taken care of and that kids to get their activities. I think you need to do what’s best for you and your fam!
Could you provide child care in your home?
Depending on where you live you could make good to excellent pay while home with your son. It can be extremely draining full-time so consider a part-time or mommy’s day out program.
I think you should try it ! Think of your money like chocolate biscuits coming into your family! Ie ,
beings some nice treats to your family!
That’s a typical day for me. If not 12 hours Monday thru Friday. I’d be home more if I could. My daughter is in kindergarten. I worked her entire life cause I’m a single mom. Cherish the time if you can
I was going to go back to work too, until we realized that I’d be putting half of every paycheck into daycare. So it made more sense to stay home for now.