Don’t tell him anything
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If that’s your sister’s boyfriend’s best friend, he’s going to find out. Also, I’d dump the ding ding sister for convincing me how “great” this dude ks
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I’d move far away and cut ties. Start over somewhere else. Someday your child is going to be curious though, so prepare for them wanting to seek him out. Then your right back to square one. Keep yourself safe. 
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Do not tell him. Don’t put him on the birth certificate.
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Why tell him when he was happy thinking you were going to abort and said “goodbye”. Let him and all that was with him go and if anyone ask who the baby’s daddy is just tell them an unknown s***m donor and leave at that - he probably wouldn’t question the child anyway if he were to see you out bc he thinks you aborted the child by him. Don’t tell him anything and go on with your life - you and your children will be much better off without him in your lives at all. Good luck and God Bless.
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You don’t have to say anything to anybody and that’s yr choice, but to me it sounds like there could be a possibility of another father considering the fact that you had to go back to dates to confirm he was in the window of conception. Yr life 
yr baby but if he does see you down the road trust he will more than likely come after you for some type of DNA and custody. But ultimately you are in control and just know every action has a reaction. Some good and some bad, so before you get to far along make sure that this is something that you can deal with cause it won’t be over until it’s over.
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Adoption! You had all these red flags and still got pregnant 
For the sake of both you n the kid find it a good home where it won’t see the drama he will soon cause n you say you’re super busy n have thought about abortion so you don’t want to bring a kid in this world that you may treat different because of the regret of having it and the hate for its father!! You def don’t need a reason to be stuck with that guy for 18 more years
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Nope. Do not tell him. Do NOT put his name on the birth certificate. I have seen first hand (as a foster and adoptive parent) some of the unbelievable decisions judges can make. Do not take that chance. Keep your child safe. Whatever it takes, and do NOT feel bad about it. 
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Don’t tell him , my daughter was in this situation and told the father and had a lifetime of hell dealing with her child’s father so i would say no for sure !
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Going through something similar but I’m baby momma number 5 and he doesn’t have any of the kids that his name is on birth certificate. I’d tell him though. Gather up all the evidence you need and get an EPO. Go after child support too. Just so there’s more proof to other women how shitty he is. When it comes to abusive relationships most people dont see the abusive side to the person because they are able to manipulate people into believing that they are a good person. Most of my relationships have been abusive because I dated a friend that I thought was “a good guy”
Dude heck no to the nooo… he’s going to be trouble for you and your baby.
You need to run and never look back. He doesn’t need to anything about you or what you decide.
Misogyny looks for control, as do narcissists. The baby would definitely be his.
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please be very careful. he could be very dangerous. love this little one you have created (im so glad you are keeping the baby, you will love being a mum and you will work it out without his help :)) i personally would tell him NOTHING. id keep well away from him. and if he ever sees you, with your beautiful child, tell him its someone elses baby after you left him. tell him anything you need to say to keep him away. the family courts can be very strange, my lawyer when going custody of my daughter after her dad, when she was 5 years old, showed her adult movies but with children rather than adults. helped me to stop her fathers access for 5 years, i was winning every court hearing, then one day i got a judge who took pity on her father and was going to give him full custody, said he was her father and no matter what he had done to her had the rights to see her and turned on me calling me a “no contact mum”. i was gobsmacked, aftee 5 years of fighting him for custody and winning every case, this judge was going to take my beautiful daughter off me, he called a lunch break and said hed come back to hand down his ruling. thank god, and ill never ever know why, we returned from the lunch break and he had a change of mind and awarded me full custody 
i will never know why the change of heart, but i thank god for it every day saying that he gave her dad, who lived in another state to me (hed left to be with my best friend, they deserved each other) full access for every day of school holidays. but at least i had her full time other than that so never think you are guarenteed to win in the family court. it was the most terrifying time in my entire life. (and i had police and doctors reports of broken arms, broken ribs etc from his hands) and still almost lost her… so please for your childs sake, do not put him on the birth cert, say father unkown. do not tell him you have kept your child and do whatever you can to keep him away from you both… and enjoy being a mum 
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Nope!!! Keep it to yourself
Stop all contact with him and no… Don’t tell him about the baby. If you don’t want him to be a part of the baby’s life and he is abusive just stay away. Is the best for you, baby, and the rest of your children.
(Honestly I would even move to keep him from coming and checking on you… especially if he is violent and unstable)
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If you are a mental health therapist you should know what to do. Say nothing to him, ever and stay far away from him. Telling him when he has already told you what he would do, is asking for trouble, duh.
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Uh ya no doubt you shouldn’t tell him! I’d move too! Run far far away!!!
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If you are a mental health therapist, ask yourself - why would you ever consider telling him anything about you or the baby. If you can support both of you financially, move to another city and never let him know where you are.
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I had this same exact situation happen where the person I was with completely lied about every aspect of his life. In retrospect i now see why he did all of the things he would do that I thought were odd, because he was trying to cover up all of his lies. I was not attracted to him at all at first- i knew him for years and he would always hit me up trying to hang out and I never would. I finally gave in and we started hanging out more and i grew to like him. He ended up getting picked up at my house by the constable for not paying child support which I was shocked out because thats where he said so much of his money went. Once he was in jail I learned from his family allllll the lies he had told and not one thing he told me was the truth and that he was severly addicted to drugs. I got pregnant and he knew at first. I told him I had an abortion. He then found out about my son and I told him he was not his and have not heard from him since. My son is almost 2 now. Good luck mama. You will choose whats best for you and your baby <3
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No do not tell him. Let him go on in life thinking you had the abortion. If he knows about the baby…from the sound of it, he will make your life a living hell.
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Keep your mouth shut and move on… I would however give a heads up to child services for the other child who is living in fear.
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I would say nothing and not put on birth certificate. Silence is best
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Put baby up for a good home I think that would be best baby mite be like him get on with your life
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Let him believe the child was aborted. Prayers for a easy pregnancy and a healthy baby 
Don’t tell him, but write down his name or whatever info for future reference, or incase your child might someday want to meet his sibling, because children are not at fault or responsible for the adult actions. Also be careful if the father seems unstable you might want to look for actions to protect your child and yourself in the future.
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I would report him to child’s services because I’d be worried something could happen to his son and no, I would not tell him. He has already stated he didn’t want anything to do with the kid and wanted you to terminate. So he does not need to know. It’s safer for you and the baby that way. Good luck, mama
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Please for your safety, the children and the child you are about to have leave things the way they are I from personal experience have dealt with Nigerian men and they have horrible tempers. I would maybe even think about moving, changing your phone number and definitely any social media he’s connected with you on go private. They’re are very controlling. Right at the moment he could tell you he wants you to have an abortion because he’s found someone else to hold his attention but if he happened to pop up and see that you are in deed still pregnant I truly believe he will cause problems. Congratulations on keeping your baby but now is the time to start making sure you and your children are safe. Good luck and many blessings 
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In most cases women will go off and secretly have kids and hide them from the father and never tell the kid about them because they want nothing to do with the father, and then when they find out about the kid crap hits the fan. However given the toxicity of the situation , you wouldn’t be wrong for not telling the father, so the answer would be no don’t tell him. You told him you were getting the abortion on the surface, but under it you’re going to keep the baby. So just don’t bother to tell them at all. Let them believe what they want. Congrats on ending things with the narcissist before things got worse. A lot of people struggle with that, but you handled it well 
. Live your life raise that beautiful baby, and when time permits if the kid has questions answer them and let them make the choice to seek the father out if they want to get to know them on their own time. You can keep yourself away from him, but don’t let the child lose out when they are old enough to make decisions .
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Have your baby. Don’t tell him. Don’t put him on the birth certificate. Give baby your last name. And raise baby like that POS doesn’t exist!! Best wishes mama!!
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everyone has story to tell it about live //go u shhtt river with no paddle////lol
Nope. I wouldn’t tell him anything at all
The baby has a right to know hos father
No!! Don’t tell him it’s his! Let him think you’re in a relationship with someone else and it’s another man’s baby!
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Don’t ever tell him let him continue to think you got the abortion
Wtf … seriously why do you even have to ask if you should tell him?? You know what a shit show that it would be and how much harm that could cause your child. I don’t even know if this is real or some bait to get people to talk , but come on!!! Where is the common sense in people anymore !?
Don’t see or speak to him again. Don’t tell him about the baby being born and definitely don’t put him on the birth certificate. I doubt he’ll try and get any form of custody after the baby’s born since that would require a lawyer, paternity test and other expenses he doesn’t have the money for. You might consider an open adoption where you could still see the kid and know how their doing without having to raise them. Sounds like you’ve already got your hands full with two other kids and working long hours. Good luck
Run…it never changes with a man like him…
Don’t tell him and report to social about the other child.
No contact forever. Have the baby-your last name. I’d even relocate. Best of luck.
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Being that you’re a mental health therapist I’m even blundered that this is even a question in your mind 
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Let him think you aborted the baby and definitely don’t put him on the bc. The odds of him actually being able to do anything about custody is slim to none especially with everything you are saying
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Do not tell him. Just go. Love your life with your beautiful babies. A healthy one. Way to many males do this then will cry around about the child needing a father when they are unfit and emotionally unstable. Better off to just go. 
Are you a Mandated Reporter? As a Nurse I am. If he tries to contact you, tell him that you’re going to report the situation with his son. Which sounds like it needs to be reported for that boys sake anyway. It would also benefit you if he ever went for visitation. Good luck!
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I wouldn’t tell him anything. You’re protecting yourself, the children you already have and the baby you will soon have. That baby is innocent and doesn’t need the trauma of a clearly horrible father.
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Do not tell him. If he asks, the baby is someone else’s and you aborted his. Just block him on everything and be done.
I wouldn’t tell him nothing and if)when you see him and he sees your pregnant or with the baby. I’d say it’s someone else’s that your engaged too. Throw him a bone and see if he chases after it.
The condom broke and the plan B failed? I don’t think so
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Tell him you had an abortion. Move away if you can (I know not easy if other kids) and make it hard for him to find you.
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Don’t say anything to him
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Wow. In most circumstances I would say it’s important and he has a right to see his baby but more likely than not he’s going to kidnap the baby and take it back to Nigeria. I’d be in contact with a lawyer and honestly I’d be so scared I’d leave town.
You need to protect yourself. Document everything you know in case he finds out. He’s a walking red flag.
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I wouldn’t tell him just for the safety of you and your baby and other children
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Nope. Don’t tell him. It’s non of his business if that’s how he wants to act.
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Personally, I would never tell him about the baby. Let him keep believing that you had an abortion.
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Not putting his name on birth certificate means nothing .If he takes you to court the Judge will order you to get a DNA test.
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No. I would also try to get his sone help. He’s being abused. Children are quiet in public and keep their heads down so as to not draw attention.
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I wouldn’t tell him anything at all
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Just pretend you don’t know who the father is and move on with your life
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Honestly, this may sound god awful. Don’t put him on the birth certificate and just tell him you had a miscarriage and move on and ignore him
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I would tell him if he finds out that the baby is not his! Don’t tell him protect yourself and the baby
Don’t tell him he sounds dangerous to you and the baby
Why did you sleep with him ??? If you unsure
I would not tell him.
I would leave him out. tell him you had the abortion and cut all contact - maybe even with the friend who set you up so they don’t let it slip.
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Absolutely do not tell him.
Definitely don’t tell him. He sounds dangerous. I’d also get a restraining order against him for you & your children
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I’d reconsider an abortion! Who knows what this baby is gonna be like. He has mental issues and so does his other son. Have you thought about how this will affect your other children. Do you really think he won’t find out you had this baby? Didn’t you say he’s your sister’s boyfriend’s best friend. You are bringing huge drama to the lives of your other children. Could this guy be q danger to your other kids. Maybe think about them for a bit.
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How is this even a question? You don’t want him to be a part of yours or your child’s life. He’s proven to be abusive, a liar, and unreliable. There’s zero benefit for him to have anything to do with the child. The rollercoaster is addicting, get yourself help and stay away from this guy.
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Reread what you wrote. You answered your own questions and or doubts. Unless he forces a DNA test I’m pretty sure he won’t come after you for legitimacy of birth. God bless you for not doing the abortion.
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Runnnn and do not tell him !
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I wouldn’t say a word
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Why are you even asking, if you read this post and it was written by someone else what would your answer be?
Don’t tell him anything. And don’t tell anyone about the baby being his as it could eventually get back to him and you said you’ve already seen him violent. If you have to just make up a fake story about the “dad” until the child is old enough to know and understand the danger
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I would not tell him and I would not name him on the birth certificate, move on
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Don’t tell him shit. He’s unstable and a danger to you and the baby. Don’t even put him on the Bc
Wow!!! Do you always make babies with total strangers? What the heck did you expect?
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Don’t tell him. And consider adoption
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I would never ever tell him
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Say nothing. Life is so much easier this way. Take it from someone who is living a nightmare with toxic , inconsistent fathers. Say nothing.
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I wouldn’t tell him but would he not find out you have had the baby from your sisters boyfriend with them being best friends?
You don’t need to tell him any thing. I was in a similar situation. The man I was having a baby with threatened to come to the hospital and beat up my boyfriend (husband now). So I didn’t even tell him. He found out on his own. When he contacted me it was never about the child. It was about him and I (like that was EVER going to happen). He disowned my child so my husband stepped up and has been there since I was 6months pregnant with my son. You can do it! You and that baby deserve better, he doesn’t deserve anything else from you. You are choosing to keep this baby, it is no longer his. You don’t want to keep fighting this fight. Live your life, love that baby and give it your all, that’s all that baby will need. That man will only do harm to that baby.
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Wow. What a long post. Secondly didn’t your sister know what a bad guy this person was before she introduced him to you? Thirdly you didn’t find him attractive but you slept with him…more than once. Anyway, it happened now you have to make some big decisions. This guy doesn’t sound like the type who is going to go away quietly…don’t give him any access to your info or life.
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I think you just answered your own question!!
No do not tell him, and defiantly don’t put him on the birth certificate. Good luck and bless you!
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Not a word. Good luck and God bless
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Get a restraining order on him and include the baby. Don’t put him in the birth certificate. Tell him nothing. Stay away
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Don’t tell him!EVER! It will just cause you and your baby distress and hell . He isn’t going to do anything to make y’all’s life better than leave his toxic ass out
If at all possible move so you, your children and the baby are safe. Best wishes
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I wouldn’t say anything. Stay as far away as possible just try to make sure you don’t run into him in public as well or he’s going to know… keep you and your babies safe!
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I would not tell him. Not ever.
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So he’s “royalty” in his country, yet lives here on welfare, sounds about right
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Do not tell him!! I believe in signs… I got to the bottom of this message and this is what I saw!! The devils number, which is never ever a good sign!!
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You need to steer clear of your best friend and her boyfriend bc even if you trust her enough not to say anything her boyfriend will surely say something even if he says he won’t …that’s his friend and your pregnant he will definitely find out you might have to cut your friend out your life for awhile for your family’s safety
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You already told him you were having an abortion, so let him keep thinking that and leave it be. You and your children are better off without him in the picture
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The child doesn’t need a sperm doner in his life. When the child gets older and asks questions don’t lie to him but give him answers to his age that he will understand. He’s threatened you and the child and I’m sure that if the child knows he’s not going to want him but never put his name on birth certificate!!!
If he already knows you’re pregnant their is a chance he can end up taking you to court at some point. But I would just make sure you have all this documented, so that If he does try to in the future you have all your ducks in a row. I hope everything works out for you. But I wouldn’t tell him when the baby is born, or put him on it yourself. Just wait and see if he does anything and if he doesn’t perfect
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The put every time you had sex in a calendar, the condom broke, and… you used plan B… idk about this
I wouldn’t tell him a damn thing or put him on the certificate.
He told you to get an abortion, that’s his decision to not go forward with his responsibilities. Just like women can choose to have an abortion regardless of the father’s wishes. Men have a right to back out when he doesn’t want a baby but the mother does. That’s just my opinion though.