My husband and I are currently having a debate about sports and our children. We have two teenage boys. My 16-year-old is very athletic and has played sports since he was a toddler. Our other son is 13 and played as a toddler and here and there as a child but never really got into sports much. I don’t think he should play if he doesn’t want to, but my husband thinks he should so he can “stay out of trouble”. What are your thoughts?
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No! I have severe asthma, eczema, and allergies - sports always ended badly for me as I was bullied for either stopping to take my inhaler, having visible eczema, or breaking out in hives during the summer. Of course, not every kid has these issues but I found that bullying was more rife in sports as it could be passed off as “part of the activity.” - throw a ball at the face, “Oh, sorry, Miss! She just didn’t catch it!”, trip someone up, “Oh! I can’t believe you slipped!” etc etc.
There are plenty of things to keep someone out of trouble that don’t involve forcing them to partake in something they clearly don’t like.
No. Do not force them to do things they don’t have any interest in doing. Push them to try things yes but let them decide if they like it. Kids do need an outlet but one they enjoy. Even if it’s video games. Anything that keeps kids from doing bad or wrong is ok as long as they enjoy it. Many won’t agree with that but I am an adaptive parent and that’s just my opinion.
If he doesn’t want to play sports of course don’t make him! But if you want him to “stay out of trouble” you can find something else for him to do. I mean it’s not like sports are the only thing to do🙄 try an instrument, singing, painting, STEM, like really
I agree with you. I’ve always felt like those who are forced to do something they don’t want to do will result in just hating whatever it is that’s forced. And they don’t do it with passion either so they won’t do well.
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If he doesn’t like sports don’t make him play. But find something else he enjoys.
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Find him a extracurricular activity he enjoys.
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He may not enjoy sports. Don’t force a child to do something they don’t want to do. Look into what they want to do, activities they may enjoy. Not everyone has the same interests and that needs to be understood more
No but There
Are other hobbies your younger son can explore to “stay out of trouble”
It is a labor of love
Sometimes kids just need a little push to be involved in something. Make him choose something. Maybe it’s music
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I don’t believe it has to be sports but I think all kids should be involved in at least one activity whether it’s sports, martial arts, music lessons, choir, art classes, theater, swimming, lacrosse- doesn’t matter what just something to have them involved making friends learning responsibilities etc etc etc
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I don’t think they should be forced into playing anything they don’t enjoy. I’d find something they like. My daughter was in karate for awhile but ended up not liking it so I didn’t force it. I’m going to sign her up for gymnastics because she enjoys that more.
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No but I do not think that the kids should suffer because the parents do not like the sport they choose let them pick what they want to do at least they are wanting to do it and it keeps them active and good to help keep their weight down ather than sitting in front of tv or in video games.
Do not force him. He will not be happy playing. If they enjoy sports then yes but if not no.
My now 20 yr old son was never into sports but my 17 yr old son has always been, so he played and his brother didn’t. His brother had other interest such as art and he stayed out of trouble. Find something he loves and help him perfect those skills.
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YES! I think every kid needs to be involved in some extra curricular activity involving a sport.
Look into different clubs. Robotics, science, music, language. Or about that age is when track and field starts up if he’d be interested in that, or wrestling, karate, taekwondo
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Do you play sports that you dont want to play?? That’s odd. Ask him what hobby he would be interested in and feed that.
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I dont think you should force him. It’s not fair to your son. EVERYONE is DIFFERENT!! My son played sports for awhile growing up BUT decided at 14 he didnt want to play anymore. I was sad at first because I Love Sports and he was VERY ATHLETIC…BUT he has to do it if he wanted to, NOT for me. He is a very successful young 28th year old man today with an engineering Degree. You can do more harm than good if he is forced…
Wouldn’t ever force my children to do anything they don’t feel comfy with. My little boy likes to play sport but on his own terms. He loves to walk so we like to get out and do that when we can xx
Both my boys were complete opposites. One is athletic and has played ball since he was 5, the other is more of a drawer and reader, and while we tried sports with him, he was never forced
Why would you force someone to do something they don’t want to do? There’s lots they can do that aren’t sports if they don’t want to. Clubs. Etc
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Not necessarily sports but he needs to find some kind of activities like band or choir or some kind of club.
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Not all kids are into sports . There are options besides sports. What are his interests? No need to spend money on something they’re not gonna enjoy when there are other options
Not everyone is into sports and that’s ok and he shouldn’t feel like it’s not
Don’t force a kid to play sports if they aren’t interested find something else they prefer. Why waste time money and energy on something like that 
There’s plenty of other things to do in and outside of school that can keep your child out of trouble other than sports clubs you name it.
Do not force him to play sports if he doesn’t want too. He can find something else that he enjoys to occupy his time and stay out of trouble .
Some kids just don’t want to play sports. And that’s ok. I’d encourage him to find something extracurricular that he enjoys doing tho.
I also have 2 teen boys ages 15 & 13. Our oldest doesn’t like sports but our younger one does. We just let them do what interests them. Find something else he’s interested in, to help keep him busy.
NO! do not force him to something he don’t wanna do. That’s just crazy.
I’m letting my daughter pick what she wants to do when she gets older.
Maybe a school club if he isn’t a sports kid?
I think it’s good for them to have a thing but it doesn’t necessarily need to be sports. I was the music/band geek myself. Find something he likes. An instrument, martial arts, painting, building cars, or whatever.
I would’ve never actively chosen to do sports if my parents hadn’t signed me up for them, and as much as I was hesitant and didn’t want to go back then - I’m glad they signed me up when they did!
As long as your kid isn’t showing emotional distress or an active dislike towards the people/activity, put them in the activity🤷♀️
My kid doesn’t “like” or “want” to brush his teeth every night, but he still has to because clearly I can’t allow him to make every decision for himself.
I fucking SUCK at winning flag football, baseball, volleyball and soccer - the sports I remember being signed up for - but my shooting aim is impeccable, I was flexible, agile and quick as a kid due to the skills those sports taught me.
There are other things he can do to stay out of trouble, allow him to learn his oWn interests
What if he just like other stuff? We all have a passion, get him to show you what he is into and likes.
Why force a child to play sports, let him find what he enjoys and pursue his own passion.
It may be band, dance, piano or whatever…
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No one should force a child to do anything. Period. Let them pick what they want to be involved in.
There are other clubs in school that would more than likely fit his interests better and still keep him out of trouble. However if a kid wants to get into trouble they’re going to sports or not.
Don’t force sports if he isn’t interested. Get him into some thing else like band, swimming, cooking, chess, etc.
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I don’t believe in forcing. My daughter will be 8 next month. She does cheer gymnastics and wants to do softball. The day she no longer wants to play she will be done and if our 2 year old never wants to play that’s his choice. If you force them they’re just going to be miserable.
Out of 4 kids 3 of them are full time into sports. My oldest tried out some sports when he was in elementary but by middle school he tried band and is now going into his junior year and band is his life! Don’t force it on him. Some kids just prefer to find their own thing versus something they are made to do.
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I think you should find activities he is interested in to help him “stay out of trouble” as your husband puts it. My son tried a few sports as a kid, but really didn’t get into any of them. Then he discovered filmmaking in high school and Tech Theater. He graduated with honors and did not have any problems with getting into any kind of “trouble” Sports doesn’t automatically keep kids out of trouble. Google “teen athlete arrested” and see how many hits come up. (About 5,300,000 results (0.69 seconds)
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I think everyone needs an outlet, but not sports necessarily. My kids are like yours, my youngest played soccer for years, has cheered, and is now playing volleyball and running cross country. My oldest tried soccer, cheer, softball, and after several years of not making the volleyball team she gave that up too. She has a passion for information, always wanting to know details about architecture and how things were made, and she likes to design things on a computer model, so we’re looking into STEM things for her. Just help them find their interest.
No. But outside time should be. Too much time inside on devices nowadays.
Some people aren’t sports people & thats ok. We are encouraging our son to try everything once & see what fits him. Hes found he is into foreign language & drawing. Best of luck finding what fits your kiddo!
I think extracurriculars are great for kids, but I wouldn’t force one they aren’t interested in. I would help them pick something else that closer aligns with what they like to do
I make my kids do ONE extracurricular a year. My son chooses baseball, my daughter likes tumbling.
That being said, my only rule is it has to be a legitimate extracurricular. It can be some sort of club, debate team, dance, art class. Whatever you want, but pick something you want to do for real because unless there’s a real reason to stop, you do it for the entire season or a certain amount of time. Especially if it’s a team activity.
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I say encourage but don’t force ,he doesn’t have to be an athlete to be successful in life
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Forcing kids to do things they dont want to do will only cause resentment. Not talking about chores and things like that but the extra curricular stuff. I don’t like being forced to do something I dont want to why would I do the same to my kids. Figure out what the other child likes and get them into that
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I have 4. 3 boys 23,22 & 12 my daughter is 14. My husband, oldest and my daughter are diehard sport’s fan’s they literally got to be constantly doing something. While myself and other 2 are not. I get wore out trying to keep up with them while the hubs is a machine. Works out for us. Both situations give time to spend with specific kid’s so on a lighter note there’s that. Hard to do that part atleast was for us
Find what he enjoys not what you want him to enjoy…i grew up with many people who were forced into things as a teen…
I would sit down with your family and discuss what he likes not what you want him to do
No! Listen to your Son!!
Your husband is right
There are things besides sports to be involved in. Never push your child to play something hes not interested in. Ask your husband how he would feel if you insisted on him doing ballet. Same thing.
I would encourage him to get into sport’s. This helps them to learn alot coordination sportsmanship How to be a team player gain physical ability. Kids are left to their own devices to much inside on games computers phone t.v. they need interaction with other’s. There’s a world of things for them help him decide. Good luck and God bless.
Do…not…make…him…do…somethin…he doesnt…have…interest in.please.
No… I wouldn’t force my child into something they didn’t want to do. Maybe force them to atleast try something and if they still don’t like it then let them quit…
There are other things he can do besides sports. Maybe he would like to try something different? Cooking? Drawing? Karate? Technology? Robotic? Maybe dance?
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I’ve never forced my kids to do anything, they don’t want to do, Either has my ex
I would find out what your child likes to do. His strengths. My husband was a sports guy. We only have one child, an 8yo daughter. She is definitely not into sports. He is ok with that. Her strengths and desires are arts, crafts, and helping others. Try to encourage him to find his so he can figure out what to do.
You shouldn’t force your child to do anything they dont want to. You can encourage him but forcing them to do something they dont wanna do is wrong.
don’t force the other son to do what he doesn’t want, But sit him down & find out what he does like
I think involvement in something is important it helps with social skills and helps to build friendships outside of school. It doesnt have to be sports but maybe whatever they may want to be involved in. Maybe the scouts, chess club, other places have different clubs to join depending on where you live. My son rides mountain bikes, dirt bikes, and is a cadet for the fire department. At one point he pkayed soccer so whatever they want to do im in. Maybe swim
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Listen to your son. Even if he was in sports he could still get into trouble 
…. I don’t get y parents think it’s okay to force their children to play sports if they don’t want to. It’s almost like parents are trying to live thru the children cause they didn’t experience something like playing sports gymnastics etc. just cause we’re their parents doesn’t mean we should be able to dictate every single thing for them they’re human they got feelings they got rights and that wasn’t y we had our children in the end.
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Can I suggest finding what he likes and getting him into a group around that do he still has to be good and get good grades but if he doesn’t like sports they probably won’t help keep him out of trouble
My 14 year old played when he was younger but doesn’t want to now. I encourage him, but I don’t force him. Why make them miserable and unhappy by forcing them to do something they don’t wanna do? You can stay out of trouble by doing other things.
Not forced to play but if my son starts a season we will make him finish it. If after that he doesn’t want to play we don’t make him. That’s a waste of time, money, and unnecessary headaches
Not all kids are athletic so instead of sports find a different extra curricular activity. We request that our kids do at least 1 a semester during the school. Such as sports ffa fha dance school play just something they are interested in.
I say NO!! My son is 13. He played football as peewee. He signed up for junior varsity but after a few practices/workouts he decided it wasn’t for him any more. He said his heart wasn’t in it. I think as a parent we should stand behind our child/children and support their decisions if there not bad decisions of course. I told my son it was his decision and I support him on it. If he decides to play a different sport or play football next year I’ll be there to support him
What not find out what your younger son likes, Maybe he is into music, or maybe he is into designing Games or playing and testing games … Maybe he likes to paint or write, maybe he like woodworking if he does not want to do sports find out what he does want to do or try!!!
Every child is different,they have different interests,try to support their interests in life
There are so many other options to explore to “stay out of trouble” if get him enrolled in what interests him
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Never force it. That’s not right.
Sports aren’t the only thing that keeps a kid busy. Maybe let the kid pick what interests them instead of forcing something they won’t enjoy doing.
Ask him what his interests are and go from there.
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Personally, I think it’s important for kids to have something to focus their attention on. With that being said, sports isn’t always the answer. The rule in our household is that if the kid wants to do something (I have a 13 year old son who wanted to play football this year and an 8 year old daughter that wanted to cheer) that once we register them and they start, they have to finish the season. If they don’t like it, they don’t have to do it again. My oldest daughter wanted to play softball, she did one season and didn’t wanna do it again. If the kid isn’t into sports and you force him into it, he’s gonna hate it and resent you. I agree with your husband that he should have something to take up his time so he doesn’t turn out to be one of those kids that ends up with the wrong crowd, but sports may not be the answer for him. Ask him what he wants to do, and don’t let “nothing” or “play video games” be the answer.
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I hated playing sports when I was a kid. If they are bad at it, they will get made fun for it, and that will make them hate even more. Maybe try asking him if there’s any other after school programs or anything else he would be interested in doing than sports. I personally wouldn’t want no one to force me to do something I don’t like so I wouldn’t force someone else to do something they don’t like, they could rebel because you are forcing them to do something they don’t like also.
I wanted to do sports growing up, my dad wouldnt let me cause my brothers didn’t wanna play sports. So I wasn’t allowed because they didn’t want to. Let the one that wants to play, play. And don’t force the other one too cause he won’t be happy. If anything he might skip practice to get into trouble since he was forced into doing something he dont want to. Tell your husband to watch the pacifier. Learn from that that you don’t force your kids go do shit they don’t don’t to
We’ve told ours that if you don’t play sport you still MUST do physical activity to stay healthy and active!
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Dont force him to play a sport he doesn’t want to, maybe you can find something else he likes maybe band or some sort of school club
Why does it have to be sports if he isn’t into it? There are other options to look into that he might like.
IMO not all kids are the same… I wouldn’t force him to play if he doesn’t want to, he isn’t going to enjoy or do well. I would encourage him to find a hobby that his is interested in. And honestly just because a kid plays sports doesn’t necessarily mean they will stay out of trouble.
Unless its self defense such as jiu-jitsu then I’d find something else.
We had the same one boy into sports the other not so much. My husband and I agreed not to make him do something he doesn’t like, doesn’t enjoy. Find out what interests him and help him to do that.
Don’t force your children to do something they don’t want to do. My parents did that on a few things and I didn’t like it… and eventually I found a hobby I like I got into reading different kinds of books from 5th grade up until I had my first child and I would read 3 books a week and not some small books like books like Harry Potter, lord of the rings Steven King. Im.now 28 and I would like to start sports early and I will give my children the opportunity to stop if it not what they want to do or of they like something else as a sport/hobby
No, he shouldn’t be forced to do anything he doesn’t have an interest in. All that will do is make him resent his dad. He could find a club or activity he is interested in. Or volunteer maybe. There are plenty of options that are not sport related
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If he doesn’t like sports find him something else he’s interested in. It doesn’t have to be athletics
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I’d never make my kids do what they don’t want to.
He shouldn’t be forced. Maybe find another activity. Maybe he’s musically inclined so dance, singing or an instrument would be of interest to him. There’s so much more to life than sports. Help him find his interest.
Sport isn’t for everyone. They’re people and have different hobbies. I’d just ask what he would like to do. Maybe he’d enjoy something less active and more brain stimulating 
We decided that our kids have to do something. Either a sport or something else extra curricular during the school year (music, stem, whatever) but, they get to pick. With sports, once teams are locked in and the season is payed for they have to finish.
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Stop forcing your kids to do anything wtf. They aren’t yours to just make them do what you want. You don’t own them.
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Find him something else that interests him. I wouldn’t force it.
Uhhh, I never played sports and got in zero trouble. I was academically focused. I would ask him what he’s interested in and find something that fits him, don’t force sports, not everyone likes sports. He’ll resent you guys for forcing him to do anything.
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It should be up to the kid. My son and my 16 daughter are very athletic my other daughter not so much. Shes tried softball etc. its just not her thing and we’re ok with that. My daughter and son love sports and want to play when school is back in session. My son was on the summer football team to get ready for HS football and he was having a hard time with it and he decided to quit. My son said maybe next year. We never pushed our kids into sports. We’ve always let them make that decision. If they play we support going to the games or even coaching them. Definitely should be left up the kid.
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Maybe an instrument.
No. If they don’t want to play then don’t make them. My son is athletic but my daughter is artistic. Let your kids be who they want and help them explore what really interests them.
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