My ex-husband thinks just because I get SSI for our son. A whole 150 a month, that he shouldn’t have to pay his child support. My ex is also 21k behind in support as it is. Yes, my son is grown, but he will never be able to live on his own. Am I wrong for telling him that he still needs to pay the 300 a month in support?
51 Likes
If the courts say he has to pay it then he has to pay it.
6 Likes
Nope not wrong. Its
For ur kid.
2 Likes
Is it still court ordered or what? He needs to pay what he is behind. But the rest is up to the courts.
1 Like
Yes, he should! Take him to court for child support. SSI of 150 a month isn’t enough to provide; no amount of money can ever replace any childs worth! People need to understand the consequences of laying down w/someone. 
Make that bastard pay what he owes to that child!!
That measly $150 per month is chump change compared to the expenses of a special needs child.
As long as a court order has legally been established, it doesn’t matter. He HAS to pay. If the child is over 18 it’ll be considered back pay. You can file for support the day before the child is 18 & he will still owe for everything as long as you elect to be compensated for back pay in your paperwork.
Research the state you live in & know what you’re entitled to.
More often that not, a family attorney will charge you a 1 time fee to let you know how to handle it, & if you file thru the state, you don’t need legal representation.
This is only my experience tho. I hope it helps.
4 Likes
If it’s court ordered, then no you’re not wrong. If your son is old enough that he is aged out of legal child support (usually 18 or through college), then it gets complicated. Morally your ex should always help support his child, but if your son is old enough then your ex legally does not have to pay anything.
4 Likes
Your SSI has zero to do with his responsibilities to provide for his child(ren). If there isn’t a court order, I would certainly get one.
5 Likes
He still gotta pay, especially all that money he owes you
2 Likes
He ABSOLUTELY should pay what is OWED to you!
2 Likes
How is he not in jail when he owes that much support??
4 Likes
He’s right…in being a jackass for even making you ask!
If he’s grown, why doesn’t the dad just pay it directly to the son?
1 Like
My son has heart lung and kidney defects and gets disability money and he got child support untill his “father” got fired for sexually harrasing the staff took them long enough his aunt managed the Wendy’s though so ugh!
Even if the “child” is an adult, a judge could still order child support in the case of a disabled child that will never not need care. The way this reads, he has some kind of order to pay support. Even if he didn’t, he’s a giant ass for thinking a measly $150 SSI extra a month is enough to support a fully grown person.
Make him pay. It’s for your child.
Take him to court over back pay. Asap
1 Like
He needs to be in jail for being that far behind.
2 Likes
That is your son’s money that he is owed. SSI is not a part of the equation.
2 Likes
Take him back to court…he needs to pay for his child.
1 Like
I do not know what state your in but michigan made my dad pay my mom until my younger brother was 26 yrs old… Once you owe you owe until child support is paid off
Take him to court they can take his income check and it garnish his wages if he is working
I’m grown and my dad still ffeeds me lol
1 Like
Not sure what state but I have a disabled son wince birth that will never be on his own. Virginia does say that dad needs to pay until the time my son can, if ever, take care of himself. He also is behind and my son also gets social security. That doesnt stop the dads obligation. Their needs just increase.
I get money from SSI for my daughter through her father. Other than that, I have never received a dime. He feels that is his child support. I had to go to the SSI office and report that she lived with me and not him as he was collecting and spending her money for years without my knowledge of it. They wanted me to report him for fraud but I feel he is living his karma so we are even. I work 10 hour days to provide for mine. I am raising her to show her what women can do! 
1 Like
Yes he needs to pay. $300 a month doesn’t even cover food. Take his ass to court
If he is 21k behind you know dam well he not going to pay nothing
4 Likes
Child support ends at age 18
How is this not court ordered? Do you have a child support order??
I think it depends on the state you live in but if the child is above 18 years old it can become very complicated and with your child receiving disability checks can also make it harder to get the father to pay child support when disability checks are considered to be a income for everyone who receives them. Try contacting a lawyer/court to at least try to get that back pay for your son.
Of course he needs to pay his debt plus some
1 Like
He should support the child just as you do. If he feels differently tell him to take it to court and let them decide. He won’t get out of the back pay but they may adjust the current. (More than likely not but let him think so, let the courts be the bad person not you)
I don’t know what state you’re from but I’m from Indiana and I can remember when my dad would even a few hundred dollars behind they sent him papers threatening arrest and he paid up real quick. That’s insane that he’s so far behind! 
Contact your state’s attorney generals office and see if they will help you
Im 28 and my dad is paying 80 a month to try and catch up on what he owes.
He can think what he wants and you don’t need to tell him anything. In my state (CO), there is a statute on the books that requires lifetime child support for disabled children. I found the statute using a Google search. I don’t know more details but I took the information to the child support office along with medical documentation and the ongoing child support was approved without my having to hire an attorney. Wages were garnered. There was no negotiation with him, there was an order from CS office, the employer was notified, he was notified and that was that. Our son was 21 at the time.
2 Likes
If your sn is grown and over 18. He should be recvng Sai if he’s disabled and cant take care of himself …he should be living in a group home or w family if he cant take care of himself … Depending in age…state May or May Not try to collect back support but once kid is certain age it is no longer required for parents to support them financially
My husband’s dad paid back child support up til he was 28.
Yes he should want to help that’s his son to just because people divorced don’t stop them being parents be it together you both had the child he should not be punish because you divorced god bless you I hope your husband will do the right thing
If he is 21k behind, maybe see if his checks can get garnished, but he clearly has no intentions on paying. My mother was the same way. She only sent $5. I’m 21 now, and they said I could garnish her disability, but if she never paid before, I’m not fighting it now. Don’t expect him to pay. /depending how much he makes, he could just work the bare minimum to survive, and you wouldn’t get jack crap from his paychecks.
My dad paid child support to my mom until I was 24! My dad was not happy! My son is 21 and his dad just finished paying back support.
You feel bad about asking him to act like a responsible adult? What is wrong with you? The law says he has to provide support…not you saying that has to provide support…THE LAW.
1 Like
No you are not wrong!!! He knows he’s wrong.
1 Like
He should definitely pay
1 Like
Yes, take him to court. If your son is dependent he will have to pay child support forever just as you’re supporting your son forever.
1 Like
If your son is ovet 18 he doesnt have to pay child support at all.
That money’s for your kid. Not you
3 Likes
You need to take him to court he needs to pay his support no if ands or buts he made the child now he helps raise the child
Not sure he has to pay after child is an adult but back child support by law he still has to pay that.
I’ve heard of 30+ year olds sueing for the child support that was not paid to them… Get a good lawyer and get your child the money they are owed!!
The benefits you receive are no concern of his. I believe he needs to continue to pay support for his child no matter what.
1 Like
This is touchy for me. To have current child support for an adult even if they’re disabled, gosh wouldnt that be awful, guess this is more of a state issue. Personally i could see him wanting to kill himself if theres no end in sight with child support.
Yes he should pay you regardless of your situation till they 18 x
I don’t know how your system works, but id still get him to pay. No matter the support you get for your child, chances are that is due to being diagnosed with something. That shouldn’t stop the other parent paying for something that he helped create.
Course he should still pay to support his child, bring him back to court and get arrears sorted that’s a massive amount to owe his child and if your child has a disability he should be supported by both parents for life
1 Like
Ask if he can survive on $150 a month and give him that reality check! Don’t allow this man to pray on your soul girl! You are doing right by your child!
2 Likes
Ive never gotten child support and my fiance now is supposed to get $1 a week from his ex but he doesn’t get it. I know my step son does not care one single bit about child support. Most kids dont.
If it’s not ordered to pay CS he’s not obligated to legally. Morally he’s a shit bag if he doesn’t help and the child isn’t able to work or provide in their own.
8 Likes
I mean if he’s that far behind it means you supported him alone while growing up and continue to raise him. So yes he absolutely should pay what is owed!
7 Likes
Make him pay through the state. If he pays you directly it doesn’t count
2 Likes
Go to court and have them decide
2 Likes
You can ask the court to have him pay even after 18 If they are special needs or are disabled
2 Likes
Heck yes he owes thousands in back pay! Hopefully the IRS enforced it. Your son is entitled to the support. Wish you well!
2 Likes
Even if you stop the child support he’ll still have to pay the $21K he owes. It’s just a matter of if you’ll get it or not… I’m not sure what the stipulations are for that though. I’m sure each state and case are different.
1 Like
He should pay but know this as a mom with a kid who gets disability, whatever you get in child support they will deduct from the Ssi. So you’ll get less in Ssi.
1 Like
If you both lived together w the son in the same household both income would support the child on top of SSI. The idea of child support is to financially support the child till age to work n live on their own. If that’s not the option in this case w your son…a parent is still a parent even after 18
You can have his wages garnished so then he has no option but to pay…it would come out before he even gets his check. And he won’t be able to stop it until the court says so. He can try to switch job but not reporting will get him in even more of a mess.
He needs to pay what the court orders him to pay. 
Nope not wrong at all
He needs to pay for his child and make the same sacrifices you are. Make sure you get all of the back pay. Have them garnish his checks.
My ex’s dad is so behind in child support he’s still paying and we’re in our late 20s. I don’t think your wrong at all. That’s his child.
3 Likes
No he should keep paying until his debt is paid off. My ex owes me roughly about $80,000 that my daughter will never see.
5 Likes
Why don’t you let the courts tell him!?
3 Likes
No, you are NOT WRONG! He is still required by law to AT LEAST pay the arrears. What a schmuck! Don’t wanna do his part to provide for his child. My ex tried the same shit!
5 Likes
He needs to pay. Not for spite or any of that. You are supporting your child, so should he
4 Likes
Once that child is out of high school / 18 years that support should be non existent tbh.
9 Likes
I mean if he back owes that, that debt doesn’t just go away. YES, he needs to pay what he back owes but legally doesn’t have to pay anything else.
4 Likes
If ur son is over 21 and he gets ssi i dont believe child support is in order with child support agency. As for when ur son was under 21 … Courts would consider ur son self supportive they did when my ex and i split they gave me a choice. Not to pay child support but i chose to and paid 25 aweek.
1 Like
My daughter had cystic fibrosis diagnosed at 4 months old
Take him to court because regardless how much you make you still have a child together to take care of. SSI does not pay enough for several people to live off of it barely gives you enough to pay your bills
No and 300 ain’t shit. He’s a deadbeat if he won’t contribute that at least.
3 Likes
People the courts will still make him pay his outstanding balance no matter how old children get but it stops accruing at adulthood. He should have to and will have to pay that balance. But it’s not up to you or for you to tell him he has to it’s the law. Thst 21k will be paid off until then he can cry
4 Likes
He still has to pay until the back support is paid off no matter how old he is.
7 Likes
I was never behind on child support either. I had a direct line to my child support worker at the time. Anytime i changed jobs she was the first to know where i worked.
2 Likes
Yes he is still responsible for child support the government is giving him the medical for his condition not to raise him.
You left out some important details. If your son is on SSI and an adult those are his benefits, not yours. If you’re saying you get $150 a month to be his caretaker that’s different. If he’s unable to care for himself he should qualify for other programs too. Are you wanting the back support to support you or your son?
2 Likes
Go to the courts, ask them to garnish his wages through his employment, instead of him paying you money from his paycheck, it will automatically come off his check and into your account
If he was a real man and father he would not even doubt to give you money for his son!! Sew him thats how they like it!!
3 Likes
No ssi isn’t coming from his as his part… he still has his part he needs to take care of… my daughters dad doesn’t pay either which is supposed to be 400 a month but he’s 10 grand behind and she also gets ssi 500 a month. But he doesn’t know.
If her ex is in arrears and she take care of their son when he didn’t pay, it is her money. Someone had to feed and take care of him when the ex wasn’t paying. This is not up for discussion. Leave it to the courts.
2 Likes
No he needs to pay it .
my “father” didn’t start paying child support to my mom on me until I was 14 years old. I am now 22 years old, married with a son and he is still court ordered to pay my mom until I am 48 IF he makes every payment on time. once I graduated high school, actual support stopped accruing but interest has not on the 14 years of back child support he failed to pay. even though my mom doesn’t support me, she is technically being reimbursed for the years he failed to pay🤷🏽♀️ she still had to pay for everything and support me for 14 years so he should be held responsible for those years he failed to do so.
I feel like this is a similar case where it is the back pay that is being paid and not actual accruing child support.
8 Likes
Idk what you mean by grown because maybe there’s no way to go about doing it now if he is too old but in other words yes he should pay. 21k behind… Did he ever pay it but once? Jeeze… Hope something works out for you.
No if he is behind he owes that and that’s his own fault for not providing when he needed to
He will owe you child support until the child reaches 18. Then if he owes back payments he will have to pay on that but once that is paid off then he will not owe you anything in regards to child support. And if he is to pay you anything for taking care of your son that is up to the courts. If he owes you that much in back pay then take his ass back to court or go to the child support office.
1 Like
No you are not wrong. Contact the Friend of The Court and if necessary a lawyer and make him pay. It sounds like your son has some sort of handicap were arrangements made for your.ex husband to continue support after he turned 18? If not ,while he still should be made to.pay the back support,his obligation for support did end when your son turned 18
Sounds like he still owes you 21k
If he owes back support his ass still owes it. Doesn’t matter if child is over 18. If he wasn’t paying when the person was a minor he still owes the debt.
1 Like
Just because your son will never live on his own, doesn’t mean he can’t help contribute. I am curious how the SSI amount is only $150. Something isn’t right with that.
Your son needs to check out your state’s vocational rehabilitation program to gain assistance with employment so he can contribute to your household. Especially if he is an adult.
He owes he owes, off to work he needs to go! He needs to pay his arrears. I think the only way he continues to pay if it is ordered by the courts. But don’t let him off the hook for back payments