Just wondering everyone’s opinions:
My fiancé and I have a 3 month old, I went back to work 3 weeks ago. His mother watches her from 1 pm to 5 pm. We pick his mom up, and drop her off, we supply all the baby’s formula, diapers, wipes, etc. She has no job, wants no job, and recently keeps throwing it in our face that she watches our child for free, when she wants my fiancé to buy her something. Recently she did it so he would go into the store and get her something because she didn’t want to get out of the car.
Should we pay her for watching her grandchild?
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Yes. You’d have to pay anyone else. Why shouldn’t she get paid?
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If she wants payment then yes. She is taking time out of her day to help you and saving you a ton of money.
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No! But a treat now & again would be nice. You should never charge family when your helping them
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Depends. I pay my mom, because it’s not her child she’s watching. She did not sign up to have the baby. But I don’t pay her as much as a regular sitter. So it’s a win win for us both. Daycare or a sitter would cost me 5x more than what I pay her.
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Yes. We paid my mother in law 100 a week when I worked. I worked 7am-6pm Monday-Friday.
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A little bit wouldn’t hurt…daycare is EXPENSIVE she is doing you a huge favor.
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Absolutely not lol she’s choosing to not work and family doesn’t charge , or mine doesn’t 
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I pay my mother to watch both of my children… It’s a lot cheaper then daycare so i can’t complain
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Grandparents shouldn’t demand getting paid for watching their grandchildren.
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But she is also choosing not to work
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You should pay her a little bit if she needs help or at least take her grocery shopping…
Yes, pay her. Especially if they are family. Personally I try not to do “business” with family because it can turn sour quickly, but if you’re going to, you need to treat them like an employee.
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Yes I had to pay my mom, probably not enough. I used to bring her a Pepsi, little things that she likes will help too…
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Maybe you could ask her if there’s anything she needs at the beginning of the week that you could buy for her instead of a set payment amount? I understand family usually doesn’t charge, but if she needs the money then I would feel bad not paying her.
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If she keeps throwing it in yalls faces then I’d pay her. Even If she offered to watch her without payment before. So when you start paying her there’s no reason for her to ask you or your fiancé to buy her things. And if she does ask her where the money y’all have her for watching the baby went but that’s just me.
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My daughter and her husband gave me a room in their house, bought me a car, provided my food and paid me.
I’d say yes but like you said…she doesn’t WANT a paying job but uses the fact you don’t pay her as a guilt trip. Personally I’d find a new sitter.
But if she wants to be paid see if she’ll take a little under standard rate and maybe take her out with you guys sometimes for dinner and get that grouch out of her.
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I mean family shouldn’t expect money from you! I think it’s very sad! My family was willing to watch my daughter for free all the time because they loved spending so much time with their granddaughter! I say she is being petty! Why doesn’t she want to help you. That’s what family does! Or should want to do!
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Since she is regularly providing childcare I would say yes, she deserves some sort of compensation, especially if it sounds like she’s trying to hint to you. I wouldn’t pay her regular childcare rates, but I would consider paying her something every week.
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I pay my mother to watch my children.
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Yes yes yes who are you kidding!!!
She’s the one that is raising your kid
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No she is family and u pay for everything so basically u are paying her in a way not trying to be rude but that’s way I look at it she should love spending time with your baby
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My family don’t charge. That’s absurd! But I do help my mom with money when she needs it.
I think it’s respectful to offer to pay her. Whether she takes the money or not is up to her. She’s not obligated to babysit just because it’s her grandchild
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It depends. Do you do anything for her? Mow her lawn, shovel her snow, take her out to eat occasionally, loan her money if needed, anything to help equal out?
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Adults pay their bills & handle their responsibilities. Adults don’t complain about their choices, they change their choices.
She’s helping you by watching her. Not everyone wants money from family but it’s something that should be talked, not assumed. The fact is you’ll be paying more to have anyone in childcare watching her and however many more babies.
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I always paid my mom to watch my children
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Yes. Better than paying for daycare. IJS
My mom charges me 125$ a week to watch my girls while we work
I take my mom out to eat pay for little things here n there n she only watches kids speratically…always offer then she will feel appreciated
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She shouldn’t expect money for spending only FOUR hours a day with her grandchild
I mean, you’re supplying everything for your child and it’s only 4 hours a day. I think she is bothered by something and just doesn’t know how to communicate it. OR she’s just not a very good person if she’s going to use her own grandchild as fodder for a temper tantrum 
Fact that she has no job would be more of a reason to pay her.
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I guess I’m lucky that both sets of grandparents will watch our kids for free. They dont want to be paid for spending time with their grandchildren and I agree with them
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yes not fair for to do it for nothing…
Maybe buy her dinner once a week but she does have a job she watches her grandbaby I know it’s only 4 hours but doesn’t mean she ignores the child that whole time. Or maybe something is bothering her not even related ask her
My mom has never once asked for money
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I pay my mom to watch my daughter and occasionally my son for an hour after he gets home from school if I have to work later from when he gets off the bus. It’s better then sending them to a daycare in my opinion
I would negotiate a payment for her since of course it’s not her responsibility to take care of your child. Whether it’s her grandchild she still should get some compensation.
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Yes pay her and avoid the heartache -
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Yes. I had to pay my mom and if you did then she would have no reas6to throw the fact she watches them for free in your face. I for one do not want nor expect anything for watching my grandkids. I feel like it would be taking from them when they need it more than I do. My mom never worked and we only pd her 20 just to go out on the weekends. I dont work but only watch them when I want to.
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She shouldn’t want you to pay her for watching her grandchild but if she needs money to pay bills & doesn’t work in order to watch her then possibly pay her some sum of money
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Yes. Because there is a difference between spending time and daycare while you work. Plus she raised her kids… this is your kid. You should definitely pay or at least offer to pay.
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age old question, pay her for sitting or put up with her …. either way, it’s not a grandparent’s responsibility to watch their grandchild for free. You’re assuming she’s cool with it, and it’s obvious she’s not. I wouldn’t be either, honestly—as I work a full time job and not about to quit because babysitting won’t pay my bills. Seriously, pay her, or pay someone else. I mean would I if I could? Probably, part time. Do I have to? Should I be expected to? NOPE.
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My mom doesn’t ask for money and never would!
Me personally I’m a grandmother and I would NEVER charge my kids to watch my babies to me that’s my quality time with them tats my payment but to each his own.
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When my mom watched my children while I worked I paid her because if it wasn’t her it would be someone else. But when she watches them so my husband can have a blue moon date night or something important the kids can’t attend I do not pay her because that’s her time to be grandma.
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Sure. Why not. Especially if its every day.
Pay her. It might ‘only’ be four hours a day but that’s a pretty long time commitment still and if she has no job she can probably use the extra cash. Watching her grandchild should not be used as a way to manipulate you, though, so if the sticking point is that she’s doing it for free, give her some money for it.
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I would just hire a babysitter. Then she can’t throw it in your face anymore. 
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If you can Absolutely , it is not a given.
I’m pregnant with my 1st but it will be the 3rd for both my mom and his and they both would never expect money if anything I’ve seen from the other grand babies they want them all the time and love seeing them its their grandchild Idk man every family is different
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Nope and go and pay a real sitter you can have control over. I don’t pay family because they feel they can do whatever with my child. At least a sitter I can hold then accountable. You wont regret it either.
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I was never paid for being able to help my children and grandchildren out
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I have 9 grandbabies.I watch 3 M-F…I do not charge my kids. I am blessed to not need them to pay me.My mother watched my children and I paid her because she needed help making ends meet.She was proud though.It was not a check for a certain amount.It was groceries, grabbing a bill while she wasn’t looking and paying it.Leaving money on the table and she would cuss me when she found it and tell me to take it back.I would just say no the kids might need something.You need to evaluate what is best for your situation.But I can guarantee child care is expensive, monetarily and emotionally.But don’t become her slave because she keeps them.She is wrong for throwing it up in your face.
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Yes, something so she stops throwing it in your face
Help a lady out. She’s doing you two a favor. Jesus.
I’m currently pregnant with my first but it will be my mother in laws 6th grandbaby. After I return to work she is already planning on watching our son and told us to not intend to pay her “because family helps out family and shouldn’t expect anything in return”
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My Mother-In-Law watches my 3 month old when I go to school and soon to be work. She enjoys it and doesn’t ask for a dime. Its also her only grandchild. But I mean everyone is different.
Pay her if you’re able to. No babysitter should be a free babysitter but that’s just my opinion
Most grandparents are different but if she complains try paying for her services sounds like you need it. If that doesn’t work out hire a sitter when she is that old we’re usually picky on who watches infants
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If shes asking… Then yes.
Do you have any idea how much daycare is?
Grandparents DON’T have to babysit, just because its their grandchildren. She raised her kids already.
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oh no . she should never ask for anything to watch her own grandchild . my MIL or my mother would NEVER ask for a penny from my husband & I. that’s just crazy in my opinion .
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My mom gets a thousand $ out of my income tax every year for watching my kids
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We paid my MIL $150 to watch our daughter Monday-Friday 11-3
My kids paid me because they know it helped me that was during the day when they worked but if they wanted to stay the night to just be with me or cause the kids needed a night out then of course not
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I dont understand why people think it’s ok to not pay people for watching their kid. Is their time not valuable? I paid my sister in law because I appreciated her caring for my child. Even if its little compensation, its something.
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five 12 hour days she deserves money and a metal there is a big difference between a night out and grandma watches children rather then being a caregiver everyday…I personally would not take money because the only way I would have my grandchildren that many hours would be if my children could not afford daycare
Yes. Pay her. If that doesnt solve the problem, find another trusted person to sit for u.
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Umm no!! Thats her grandchild. Thats like my cousin getting mad cz she is eatching her grandchild for free. No she enjots wayching him and doesnt fuss about money!! Thats ridiculous. Im sry this is happening to you both
Yes, if it’s a full time thing…or give her something she would like. Or get someone else. Don’t take advantage of her just because you thinks its a free thing…
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When I am a grandma I will do it for free. They say our generation sucks, my grandparents didn’t get payed for spending time with us even if they were watching us.
I say yes give her something.
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In my opinion grandparents no you shouldnt have to they are family they should love that they are getting to spend time with there grandchildren
I paid my mom to watch my kids and brought groceries too and when my daughter is not at work I make her pay me
If it’s an everyday thing then yes absolutely pay her. Daycare is expensive. She doesn’t have to babysit.
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Yes … or at least offer … I understand it’s her grand child but she is saving you a butt load of money with not putting the baby in day care
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Uh yeah. If she had a job you’d have to find a sitter where you’d provide all the formula still and I’m sure it will be a lot more then what you’ll pay her
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Depends on her situation… if she is in need of money then yes.
My family would never ask or take money for watching my son. That sounds crazy to me, but I guess if she wants money you’d pay anyone else so you should talk to her and work something out, definitely not a lot though. Like $20 a day.
Why not she’s doing a service
Give her something if that doesn’t resolve her attitude then find someone else to watch the baby honestly if she offered to do it for free to begin with I don’t think you should have to but some people only do things so they can throw it in your face later
Why not?? If she was not around or willing to watch the baby, you would have to put the baby in a day care. Would you ask if you should pay the day care?? She is helping you and you would be helping her out financially, especially if she’s on a fixed income.
She watches your child every day that you work. I think you need to pay her something especially if she doesn’t have an income. It’s only right because basically it’s looks like you’re taking advantage just because she’s a grandparent and people want to assume you shouldn’t pay family. If i was watching a family members child every day while they worked I would want to be paid something. Now if it’s every now and then to help you do this or that or run errands, no, I would not expect to be paid, I would help you out and do you the favor, but since it’s every day while you work yes it’s only right.
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I would never charge. Especially for just a few hours each day if my child was providing me with rides and everything the child needed. You know what. I still wouldn’t charge my child. Why, because we are family. But this day and age everyone sees dollar bills because they’re entitled. I would say well if you feel that way then I’m going to have to find a real sitter to pay a few hours each day that won’t need rides and may provide for the child. My daycare provided everything but diapers. Or just get a job where you both work opposite shifts so no sitter is needed.
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my son paid me when he was in school and I watched his kids on a daily basis. When I watch them for him to go to the store or do s project or anything like that I dont get paid nor do I want paid
Honestly when I was pregnant with my daughter and was working I was on my own and I had to pay my sons dad 200$ every 2 weeks and he only watched him.4 nights cause I worked nights and had no one else u do what you have to do
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My mother In law never ask us for money when she watches our son. But I don’t work. My husband works at night. Plus I’m pregnant with our 2nd.
No that is her grandchild .
Ya if she asks and you’d rather her do it than someone else
My kids grandma watches my two every now then when id work. And the daycare was. Closed or had to work late. She would say the same thing. But id pay her anyways. Even when id send them w their snacks n drinks … But i pay her so noone can say she does it for free but i keep it between her n my self
I would say come up with a weekly amount and pay her every Friday when you pick your daughter up. Like a job b
Just give her some food or get her a dinner here or there. That is what I used to get from watching my 9 nieces and nephews while they grew up.
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That’s her grandchild. And it’s four hours a day. If she has nothing better to do (doesn’t work) and doesn’t need the money then I don’t see a problem not paying her. Sounds like she just wants your husband to buy her stuff
Really! You are bitching because she ask if her son would buy her something after saying she babysit s for free? Think of the freakin money she saves you weekly. You should buy her something nice once a damn month!
Next time she says that say, how much would you like us to pay you, because throwing it in our faces for the rest of our lives is really going to put a strain on our relationship
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Yes. I would never let anyone watch your child for free on a permanent regular basis. Their time is worth money too. They had their own children and now they’re helping you raise yours. I’ve never entered into this situation because of the same exact thing I would never be able to have somebody hold it over my head that they watch my child for free. Why are people having kids if they’re expecting everybody to watch them for free??? Don’t assume if she need money or not, it’s her life not yours and not your call to make. Nothing in life is free. End of rant…
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Yes you should be paying her. To start with day care isn’t charged by the hour so you’d be paying full day prices if she stopped babysitting. And many day care centres can ask you to supply needs as well.
While she may not be working, or want to work you should be respectful of her time she gives and helps you to work.