The kids already know. And yes it’s not healthy to stay if yr not in love. But you may wanna rethink this…the grass isn’t always greener on the other side.
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Leave… sometimes the grass is greener on the other side of the fence.
Love Is A Choice Not A Feeling, you can’t just loose interest and nt try your best to make sure you regain your feelings for your husband
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Your kids will know.
If you can hang out, you still can. Don’t teach your kids this behavior. Raise them do they don’t need therapy.
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Put your kids,happiness first. To many bring in a new man to be near,their children
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I want my child to grow up seeing the relationship I would want them in. Life is too short not to be happy. Always choose happy. I would never ever tell anyone to stay for the kids. The kids will be fine. Kids are more resilient then we give them credit for 
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My ex husband stayed to after splitting up. He lived his life and I lived mine and both took care of the kids under one roof. We both got into separate relationships and there was no animosity. We got along fine with each other’s significant others. We sat down and had a conversation beforehand and decided we could be happy together with our children under one roof and each able to live our lives respectful of each other and be a family at the same time. It can be done or you could live apart and still successfully co parent. Y’all need to have a serious conversation.
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Im sorry but no you shouldnt stay together for the kids you both deserve a second chance and you can still be good freinds and good parents living apart therevwill come a time when you resent each other and that wont be good for any of you
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2 happy homes are better than a fake one, your kids will pick up on the unhappy vibes trust me! If your not happy then leave, life’s too short xx
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What would you tell your kids to do if they were in this situation
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I would think he has false hope
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You can be separate and still have a happy home life? The two aren’t mutually exclusive. If nobody is happy in the relationship, arguing or not, they will feel it and the stress that brings. Me and Ex had a VERY unplesant separation but it was the best thing. We regularly all go to the park etc, our dude has a brother on his Dads side and a sister and soon to be brother on our side. We all get on well and hang out. They get double Christmas. So that he can see both sides of Family but we would have to do that anyway. Other than that everything big is done together.
You can’t keep a happy family if your not happy. Kids will pick up on it eventually. I tried for years.eventually it turned out dad or myself would stay out for as long as possible so we wasn’t in the house together daughter picked up on it. We tried the whole family days and stuff and it fizzled out. He chose to leave both parents happier. But it still hurts knowing we couldn’t give our daughter a together home
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Absolutely not. The kids will be hurt.
Doesn’t sound like a happy home…just bc you think you guys get along great, that’s only bc he isn’t into anyone else, but wait until he finds someone who does have feelings for him…would you be able to accept that?? And continue getting along with him when he doesn’t come home on a Friday night??
I think if happy and healthy you can still live together, but be honest with the children.
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Why show your kids that it is ok too be unhappy?
You’re not happy so how would your kids be living in a happy home.
Your teaching your kids its ok to be in a love less relationship. Also if you dont love him thats so horrible to stay. Let him move on & find someone who actually loves him.
Its not a happy home life when you are not happy.
l get paid over $157 per hour working from home. l never thought I’d be able to do it but my buddy makes over $18396 a month doing this and she convinced me to try. The possibility with this is endless.
M0re Info. https://amazingincome287.pages.dev/
NEVER stay just for the kids
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Try things to spice up the marriage,see if you can revive those old feelings.A good solid partner is hard to find.If you leave this man,you will live to regret it.
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Your kids see what is going on so leave as it will have long term effects if you stay
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Yes, as long as you get along, do things as a family, and role model a loving caring, respectful relationship. If you can’t do this, then no.
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Being in love is a choice not a spark. Especially in long marriages. Effort is needed to keep it on both ends. You say you get a long but do you still go out on dates just the two of you? Is there any effort in the relationship you two have or is it just focused on the kids. Romantic love in the long term is a hard thing to define. 
Did you try speaking to a professional ? Do you want to put effort or just call it quits:thinking:
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You’re not fooling your kids. They can see your unhappiness. If you have no interest in getting back to a romantic place with your husband, then you need to set him free by leaving. Staying gives mixed signals. He deserves someone to love him back. If you dont, end it. Your kids will understand when they’re older. My parents did the same thing. All time did was grow the resentment and in the end, they hated each other and still do to this day. Leave. Before it gets toxic.
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Sounds to me u need therapy…u got a false sense of realization of what a happy marriage should be since you grew up in an unhappy home and that energy is feeding off on u to want u to leave ur husband…I’m sure growing up you seen infidelity from one of your parents…good luck
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Personally yes I would. If you’re not unhappy and not fighting then yes I would stay. I would also consider working on the relationship too. Sounds like it’s something that could possibly be fixed…
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Well you made a vow
And in the God eyes you don’t have a good reason to leave
But what you need to do is to find out why you married him in the first place.
Start from their.
Go get help together
It’s so easy to split it hard work to stay together
Good luck
Go from their
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Kids know what’s going on. They will end up resenting you later on. You may get along great now, but that could change. Especially if he can’t accept that you don’t love him. That wears on anyone
my parents divorced when I was young, I will say it does change everything. There is the who do I go with at special occasions, I don’t want to upset one parent over the other. Never having both parents there at the same time to celebrate holidays is hard and a lot more to try to plan, then throw in there my husband, and still needing to get together with his side of the family. I am just giving you the reality of my life, it puts a lot of stress on your kids especially when they get older and have to start to chose between the time they have to make things happen with everyone.
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Family is hard to come by once you don’t have one anymore… It is a drag to feel like you’re missing out on the highs and rushes of romance. Hollywood makes it look good. But romance is highly overrated. Strong, steady, and true would be my pick. There are guys out there that will come one strong to get whatever they can from you. It’s a jungle.
Of course you’re going to lose your spark, throw some kids,bills and life into any relationship. This is where the commitment part comes in, are you committed to the relationship? If your kids are young then what you’re experiencing is normal. It takes up until they are teenagers to really get that back into your marriage
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No. Better to raise them in a happy home with one parent.
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The best thing my son’s daddy and i did was to finally have a come to Jesus meeting to discuss our relationship, as we both were unhappy… we were thankfully both on the same page and agreed to be great friends with a baby and we coparent tremendously. We are both happier seperated; the kids will pick up on the tension eventually
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No what good are you doing the kids if you not happy because the will sense and feel it…eventually your unhappiness becomes their unhappiness
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Please don’t. My parents did, they thought they hid it well…they didn’t. I knew my mom hated my dad. Growing up I never got to see how I should be treated, and how a real healthy relationship should be. Because of that I ended up in some horrible, abusive situations (mentally, physically, financially) and I am still trying to learn what real love should look like at 30 years old. Please don’t do that to your children. 2 happy homes are better than 1 unhappy one.
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In my eyes thats not a happy family…. And its not fair to either of you
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If you aren’t unhappy then stay for the sake of the kids … You owe them a stable and happy childhood
Doesn’t he deserve someone that loves him ? He’s got one life and you are considering taking his best years away from him ? Why can’t it remain a healthy happy co parenting relationship if you’re not together? The most healthy thing is if you remain good friends and raise the kids with your future partners all together as one unit with good values. Your kids will understand that’s what love is supposed to be.
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You’re only leaving because you’re not “in love”? But you’re not unhappy? Why would you leave? To go find some new young dude? Ruin your family? Sounds like you have you’re own issues that need to be fixed before you destroy your kids idea of a happy family.
He deserves to be happy too. Good luck.
If he is cheating on you and mistreating you abusing you then that is a good reason to leave and dont stay in it for the kids it will hurt them in the long run but if you have found a young stud and want to get out of the marriage for that Then you need help. Dont split up your family just because you are not in love and unhappy. Heck I am so unhappy its unreal in my marriage but my kids are grown now have their own families. but my husband has some health problems so I am not just going to just up and leave unless he starts cheating on me again or geting abusive again.
So why are you staying if not in love.Your not happy leave.Thats not a happy family.Not fair for either one of you.
Let him go be happy!! It’s not fair to him or your children!!
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Leave. It is better for children to be raised by separated parents who live in happy, healthy, loving homes than to be raised in a home filled with tension, sadness, anger and no love between the parents. Your children will base their future relationships off yours. You would not want them to live in a loveless marriage when they could be happy alone.
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Only if you want your kids to grow up thinking it’s fine to live in misery
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I think you need to go to therapy. I think that you might need to work on you a bit.
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Remember how and why you fell in love
Make a night to put kids to bed early (tire them out) make a dinner for yourselves not fancy
Talk Dance and enjoy each other
Go to the beach just before sunset
take a drink and snacks sit on a blanket watch the water and the sunset do the things you did together then deside together
At least try if you don’t you will
Regret it
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I cannot comprehend why people think this is a better option. A happy home consists of happy parents and happy children. You’re happy being in a loveless marriage that you wouldn’t even be in if you didn’t have kids? Your husband is happy knowing you would rather not be with him? If you think your kids can’t sense it you’re wrong, unless your kids have disabilities and are unable to understand others emotions, and such. There are already too many people walking around totally damaged with no understanding of a healthy relationship because their parents stayed together when they shouldn’t have. Nobody should be adding to that.
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Leave that’s what I did.
Im a huge hypocrite, but I’d say no. Kids deserve a happy, healthy, and stable home, with the loss of happiness and love, yet the building of resentment and indifference, doesn’t make that possible. You both deserve someone who makes you happy and loves you. Like i said, im kind of a hypocrite because I’ve been in a similar situation but everytime i try and talk to family about it for advice, im told “suck it up” in not so many words, so i just stopped bringing it up. It’s not worth the suffering and your kids 100% see it, even if it doesn’t seem like it. Don’t be like me, find a life that makes both of you, therefore your kids, happy.
NEVER… It hurts the kids in the long run
So you’re asking if you should choose between feeling lust (again) with someone new OR a comfortable, stable home life?
Before you choose, exhaust all methods of hope: date each other again, couples counseling, make each other a priority, make time one-on-one.
No relationship/ marriage is ever perfect, but it sounds like yours does have the one important trait: respect. And THAT is rare.
Best of luck on your choice.
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Grass is not always greener out there FYI…
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I stayed in a relationship, not a marriage, for the sake of the child for14 yrs. Then one day I realized it was all a lie and I was teaching her it was ok to lie. We teach our kids not to lie but to be true to themselves. Kids are resilient and will bounce back but living a lie could bring abt the same happiness or worse. Physically and emtionally abused ppl rationailze staying for the kids while teaching the kids to follow in their pattern and make the same decisions/choices. The generational curse is not easily broken.
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Therapy, single and couples, The Love Dare, 5 love languages. Date, reconnect.
people change and grow, grow together talk about what has changed.
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No!! Never stay just because of the kids. If your not happy, or he’s not happy, leave.
Is it really happy for your kids.Kids are not stupid they can feel it between you too.Life is short don’t stay some were you are not happy.
l get paid over $167 per hour working from home. l never thought I’d be able to do it but my buddy makes over $18841 a month doing this and she convinced me to try. The possibility with this is endless.
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If you really get along and feel you have just lost romantic love for him, it could be that your hormones are out of balance. Low estrogen can cause disinterest in romance as can depression. How old are the kids? Are we talking about staying with him for another couple of years or a another decade or more? If you really do “literally get along great” see a marriage counselor and your doctor and see if there is anything you can do to bring back the spark. If not, then start making your plans to leave.
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Does he still do the things that made you fall in love with him in the first place and visa versa. A lot of relationships become stale because people quit doing the little things once they hit that comfortable stage but that doesn’t mean it not something you can get back.
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Are you unhappy in this situation? If so I’d end it. Having the children see a loveless marriage that leaves you both unfulfilled is worse than watching their parents be happier apart. And possibly find love again.
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i stayed in my 10 yr marriage for my kids witch he was there stepdad. as i saw they were happy i stayed for them as time went on i was very very unhappy. and that took away from being a good mom to them because i was all ways mad and stressed because the way he treated me. Now that we aren’t together and i’m remarried my kids don’t live with me all ways say they want there family back 
somtimes it’s not the best to stay or leave
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Nope. Leave him and the family. Have all the wild sex you want and need. Find a guy who will treat you better.
smh.
Nope them kids gonna grow up one day and bc they lived with unhappy parents they will grow to be unhappy never teach ya babies to be unhappy
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l get paid over $167 per hour working from home. l never thought I’d be able to do it but my buddy makes over $18841 a month doing this and she convinced me to try. The possibility with this is endless.
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Figure out together how to rekindle the romantic feelings esp if you get along great.
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Kids would rather have two happy parents separated, then two unhappy parents together.
Never stay together for the kids. It causes them more harm.
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Not if you’re not being treated respectfully in front of them. They learn by watching you.
If u are unhappy you ev1 else will be as well, never make the mistake of staying for the kids sake bc actually all they will see and learn is to endure misery and to be unhappy and to hate … so for the kids sake end the marriage
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I thought I was doing the right thing by staying with my ex of 17yrs even though we spent the last 7 in separate rooms.
But he was also an absusive and manipulative gaslighting narcissist and an addict. I didn’t want my kids thinking this is what “love” is. Unconditional love does not mean Unconditional treatment.
I left almost 2 years ago. My son is thriving with me. Unfortunately our daughter struggles because she’s choosing to be with her dad where there aren’t any rules and it has thrown her into a downward spiral. However, she’s 14 and these are choices of her own, and when she’s ready to learn from them I’ll be here with open arms.
I blame myself for the hell myself and my kids have went through, because if I would’ve left 10+ yrs earlier when I wanted to, they likely wouldn’t have any of the issues they have now.
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No, it hurts them also
I think you need to put some work into your relationship. If you lost the love, why? What has changed. Do you have feelings for someone else? If so squash them. Do the two of you forget to go on dates and make special time for your relationship? If so, go on dates, a romantic weekend getaway… whatever it takes.
There is always a reason why one person is " falling out of love" it usually is because they aren’t putting enough energy into the relationship. Such as giving their attention to someone else. The grass is greener where you water it.
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So what if the nature of your relationship has changed, the real commitment happened when you guys decided to have kids, if you want to finish that project as roommates do it
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If you feel strongly about a stable home for your kids, I say stay.
Nothing can replace that support to children.
And they deserve it.
The day we have children, out lives no longer belong to us.
Yes after the last one complete s college and is on their own, then yes we can do whatever we need to.
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That’s not a happy home a happy home is when the whole family loves each other and wants to be together. Don’t stay if you are unhappy kids can tell when their parents are unhappy. You staying is just teaching them that’s what marriage is. Just think when your children grow up would you want them to stay in an unhappy marriage just for your grandchildren. No you are doing more harm then good by staying and letting them see you unhappy. You don’t want your kids to grow up feeling guilty because they think it’s their fault you stayed in an unhappy marriage. Your kids will still have their dad and mom you guys just won’t all live under the same roof anymore.
title don’t make sense
Staying for kids is completely wrong for them
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Have you tried couples counseling? Therapy? How old are the kids? If they’re young, it’s more important for them to see both of their parents happy. If they’re like 16 or 17, I’d honestly wait until they graduate. If & only if your husband is a great father & the only reason you want to leave is because you’re no longer in love.
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Lady, Start dating your husband.
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No it does way more damage trust me
Sounds like the problem starts with you. Figure your self out. Before you ask strangers on the internet about you problems.
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Honestly if your staying, I can see why he thinks your still in love with him
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Kids are better to come from a brokem home than a toxic one
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I did for over a decade until they were of age as I loved my kids.
U wouldn’t be the only one… Maybe try and find a hobby to immerse yourself into? There are numerous pro’s & con’s but there is no guarantee u will meet the love of ur life if u do part ways. Make sure u love urself & will be prepared for the challenges of single-parenting. Getting rid of hubs may not make u as happy & relieved as unexpect if u are faced with other challenges - financial strain being one of them. Good luck x
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As someone who has done both, I feel strongly that you’re hurting your kids by depriving them of the opportunity to see what a healthy relationship looks like.
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No! You have to work on that spark! It’s like growing plants. You don’t just give it water once! I’ve been with my husband 27 years( 9th grade)
Let me tell ya he has gotten on my darn nerves! Makes me wanna pull my hairs out. He’s my comfort, my safe place. Plus he has so much patience with me!
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Nope if you guys can still hang out then you can effectively coparent. My parents stayed together for me and it was miserable.
That you aren’t teaching your children anything positive. The longer you stay the more bitter you will be and your kids will not only see it but also be subjected to it.