The man I am seeing told me he is moving across country: Advice?

The man I’ve been in a relationship with for two years just told me today he’s considering moving across the country. He knows I can’t follow him due to my custody agreement with my ex and our children, or I would have to give up my kids, which I’m sorry no man is worth. He said it’s “not for sure but considering it.” What would you do? Wait it out or split now?

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You can’t ask strangers about that, he didn’t say he’s moving, so why would you break it up when nothing has happened? If he does tell you he’s mpving away, when then you have to think about breaking it up, but why would you break up if he’s not moving away yet? Unless you don’t want to waste your time with him, then why stay with him?

Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. The man I am seeing told me he is moving across country: Advice?

I think you just answered the question yourself

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The fact he is even considering it says he isn’t really invested in the relationship. I’d move on now

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Wait it out. People talk

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If it was me I’d wait. I mean yeah it’s shitty for him to just up and move but maybe he’ll change his mind

Byeeeee send me postcards and plane tickets sucka! :kissing_heart::kissing_heart::kissing_heart:

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I’d split. Obviously he’s not full in on relationship or he wouldn’t be planning to move.

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He’s basically saying I know your stuck but I have options

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Idk if he’s considering moving what kind of relationship will you even have? A long distance one that won’t go anywhere unless he decides to move back. Kinda seems like he’s saying there may not be a future with you.

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Split now! He obviously didn’t even considered including u in this decision…he just told u about it… u deserve better :relieved::kissing_heart:

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Maybe he’s just saying it to see if your invested in the relationship ?

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Cut him loose now. He just showed you how he really feels about you. Knowing you can’t leave with him and being ok with that…not worth building a future with. You’re not in his heart and neither are your kids…who would have become his as well, had a future worked out for you two.

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I would tell him bye

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Split, he doesnt see you in his future if hes considering this.

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He already knows about the custody order with your children so for him to even ask you to go tells you what?? And waiting it out to see if he goes go or not wtf him asking you in the 1st place should tell you …

What’s the reason he’s moving across country? How long before he decides what he’s going to do? I mean if he’s not moving to be with family or for his job than time to end the relationship now. This guy could be moving because he has another women because no man is going to get up and just move for no reason especially if he’s happy with his relationship.

He’s not invested in you or your children if he is considering this move. He knows you can’t go. Wave bye bye you deserve better

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Rip the band-aid off now

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I would say split now, bc if he was invested with you and your babies, he wouldnt even consider it.

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Why would he say something if he wasn’t sure? I think you should have a rational conversation together before making a decision in the heat of the moment

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If he’s considering it, then he’s giving you a heads-up that he’s already considered the fact that he knows you won’t be joining him. You need to decide whether you want to be left hanging! Tell him to move on, if he’s not being serious about what you have together.

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Split now. Why waste your time.

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He may be considering it because he is unsure of what your future holds together so instead of focusing on the why he’s considering it. I would ask if he does move what is he expecting of you

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I would wait it out. He may change his mind, and what is his reason for wanting to move?

Unless it’s for work or military or sick family member, call it quits. He is looking to start over and has no interest in including you in any way.

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Boy bye!!! He is not worth it.

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He’s a narcissist lose him now !!!

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Split now. This is a soft way of trying to break it off with you

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Unless its God lead :v:

He might not be moving across country. But he would be moving somewhere. To not consider your situation is just rude. Be Gone Mr.

Split up cus obviously he doesn’t care about u….

Just remind him face to face that u have a custody agreement and cant move… and then see his reactions and words. Just to give someone the benefit of the doubt … jus being sure. Sometimes people forget. But if he for sure knows then ask him what he expects of u ! Sounds like jus wants to move on…

he is playing games so let him go

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Know your not worth him staying for or even talking to about wanting to leave state I’d say just let it go

I get this sucks. But why is he thinking of moving? He should do what makes him happy. Just like you should do what makes you happy. Doesn’t mean he doesn’t love you. If it is something that is going to better himself such as work . I get it. I applied for a position 6 hours from where my husband and I live. If I get the job I am going. I will come home every other weekend. We have 6 kids. 3 are grown. 2 want to go with me. We aren’t splitting up. But it would be an opportunity I would later regret not taking.

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See ya! Wasn’t even man enough to talk to you about it?

I wouldn’t wait around for him to chose. Clearly if it’s a consideration he does not care for you like that. He’d probably tell you this again next year. Do not play these game with him

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Like you said kids first and if he’s saying that HE’S considering instead of WE… he don’t give a :poop::woman_shrugging:

Tell him to F#@* off now.

Why would he consider it if he wants to be with you knowing you can’t go…. Looks like he’s looking for an excuse to leave :woman_shrugging:t3: sorry girl

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If you tell him how you feel, and he goes anyway, there’s your answer.

My son went through a similar situation recently. He was in love with a woman who had an opportunity to add a distinct upgrade to her resume by moving out of state. He didn’t want her to go, but he didn’t want to ask her to stay, and then be the reason for a lost opportunity on her part. She moved. They decided to maintain a long distance relationship. A couple of months after she moved, he told her how he really felt … she said if she had known, she wouldn’t have gone. At that point, she was under contract to stay where she was. She was gone 2 years … a couple of weeks before she was coming home, she was involved in an accident and died. He was devastated.

You never know where life is going to lead you, bit you can’t expect him to read your mind. Tell him how you feel … hold nothing back. If he still chooses to leave, you’ll know it’s your time to make decisions of your own.

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Tell me you’re breaking up with me without telling me you’re breaking up with me.

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He’s not that into you if he can even consider that.

Time to find someone who truly values you, not someone who is just with you because they don’t want to be alone

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He’s willing to give up on your relationship. He’s probably looking for an emotional response from you. Don’t give him the satisfaction. Just tell him if that’s what he wants to do ok.

Sounds like he’s trying to keep a safe place to land if his other girl don’t work out. No way.

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Doesn’t seem like someone who’s looking at anything long term with you. I mean unless you’re willing to do a long distance relationship I don’t see how that’d work.

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Kudos to you mama! You LOVE your kiddos more than :eggplant:!!! :clap:t2::clap:t2::clap:t2:

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Sounds like he’s considering plans without ya! Byeeeeeee

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Split now. Even considering it shows he would have no probs leaving you.

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Bet that relationship is fun. Split… and don’t look back.

He’s basically telling you he’s considering moving on, so I’d make it easy for him. I’d leave the relationship and wish him the best of luck.

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Spilt now. He’s already telling you that you are not a priority

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Don’t let the door hit you where the good Lord split ya.

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Gotta move on. If he knows u can’t go and decides to go anyways maybe it’s his way of getting out of the relationship. Keep taking care of ur babies. The right one will come along

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Either let him go or wait to get your heart broke . Do what you want it’s your life you gotta live it :heart:

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Just wow. There’s no reason to see him again, even if he doesn’t move.

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If he can walk away that easily after 2 years, let him

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There’s a reason his life plans don’t include you… let him go regardless and do not waste your time, it might hurt now but it’s worth it in the long run, you deserve better!

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I’m the odd ball… if he’s moving bc of his job… or a better career opportunity I’d stay with him and do long distance… there’s always vacation… he can fly to see you on weekends… there’s facetime… where there’s a will… there’s a way… this is how many military wives make their relationships work… any how… you have to communicate and decide what works and what is acceptable…

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He knows you won’t move because of your kids and he’s considering the move, I’m sorry but you and your relationship doesn’t mean much to him. think about this if you’ve been together 2 years and he can just move away you must be more invested into him than he is to you, run don’t walk away from him!

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You should probably rephrase that the the man you used to be seeing. It’s clear that he doesn’t take you, or your children into consideration while making this decision. Seems like you might be more invested in the relationship than he is. Regardless of whether or not he decides to go, it wouldn’t be a bad idea to step back and reevaluate the situation. You’ve already invested a couple of years, and he seems to have no qualms about literally moving away. How much more of your and your children’s time are you willing to put in?

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Split now! He clearly doesn’t see the relationship as a serious one as he is happy to move away knowing you can’t follow!

Wait it out. I tell my man all the time I’m moving to a different country with or without him but he knows I’m not leaving him :joy:

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Ask yourself how important he is in your life. You can fight or let him go.

He for sure doesnt love u or care about ur feelings

Maybe he is just not that into you

Split now. Sounds like he is toying with your feelings. Ditch him !!

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Give him his freedom to do what he wants and move on.

Bye Felicia! There is more fish in the sea… let him go and put your fishing pole out to catch a better fish!!!

Definitely go now. Why waste anymore of your time. Move on.

Sometimes people just grow apart. I would end the relationship personally.

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Sounds like he’s playing you, get rid of him

Hes planning a future without u, let him go before u waste more of ur life

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Split-why wait if he is not committed to you?

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If he knows your arrangement he wouldn’t consider. If he goes or doesn’t I’d let him go.

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2 yrs ? And this is even a option for him? Smh nope

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I believe, if you are in a serious relationship, you don’t make these decisions without your partner. If your relationship was that important to him, why would he leave?

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I had a similar situation with a guy once. The relationship did not last long after that… I mean when you find out that they’re considering a future without you, it all just kind of ends right there, right? I mean do you want somebody that would even consider something like that this far into the relationship? Do yourself a favor and break free now and find someone who is committed.

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Cut him loose! It’s very apparent he is not taking your feelings into consideration. To even consider moving to another state knowing you can’t go with him should be your answer! Let him go!

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Obviously he doesnt care about you or your kids. Dump

Say bye bye… and have a good trip!!

Relationships aren’t all or nothing. He is his own person and he should be able to voice his wants and goals too. Everyone saying to split and end a relationship based off of one comment where he was thinking out loud and without having an actual conversation on the topic just sounds dumb - love isn’t a T.V. Sitcom. You’re both adults and should speak to each other honestly face to face about what you both want. Obviously you follow this page and see that any time a woman asks a question about a relationship everyone tells them to just “run” or “split” or “end it now”

From my point of view it seems more like your mind is made up on the subject and you’re posting here just for justification.

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Id say have a great life and I wish you well!

If he’s coming to you and telling you he’s considering it, knowing you couldn’t leave if he truly decided to go… split. Now.

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Maybe it’s a sign from above

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Let him go, then forget he ever existed.

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Cut him loose why keep him around he’s obviously stringing u along

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How would I respond to being informed that I’m merely an option? I think tell him to be sure to let the door hit him on his way out.

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I see all these people shaming him. Is he not allowed to grow as a person and take a different path than her? If he came to you and talk to you about it that’s not him being insensitive or an asshole, it’s him being honest. His life is obviously changing directions in a different way than yours. Does it suck that you guys had 2 years together? Absofuckinglutely. Does a relationship mean having to stop moving forward in life? Not one bit. Sometimes people just move on, there is nothing wrong with that. If he’s being a dick about shit then yes girl say fucking goodbye but if he came to you and told you his plans respectfully then all you can do is say goodbye and move on. It sounds easier said then done but obviously it wasn’t working if he wants to move and is ok without you coming. It’s heartbreaking but these things happen in life. You will find someone who fits you and your child’s life perfectly, obviously this man wasn’t it. No need to hate him for moving on with his life.

Obviously you’re not his concern. I’d say why are you wasting your time? Even that he is considering it is a solid hint to you that he’s lost interest. Of course you could always be his stand-by if that’s who you are. Not me baby, I’d tell him to kick rocks now.

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Dreams are important to people. I think it’s great he brought it up to you to discuss, instead of just assume an outcome. Shows maturity. Talk it out. You never know what can happen

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He’s not asking you to go with him. Obviously, he wants to break up with you. He’s probably seeing someone already… dump him!

Tell him that really sounds great, you wish you could go too, but he should follow his dream. That will let him know that you are okay with his decision - but you have your life too. (Good-bye eventually)

Explain to him how you feel, if he decides to leave. You’ll know he feels and never valued you or your children. That is not a man, hes a boy. And you just dodged a bullet on spending the rest of your life someone like him.

I would tell him since he knows I can’t move, and is considering it anyways, that he obviously doesn’t care about me enough, and to kick rocks

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Split now, see of your worth losing…maybe it’s a game on his part. Make your own big girl decisions in your own panties…

Well, if he wants to go let him.

Idk why nobody’s said this yet, is he not entitled to a better future, more pay, better benefits, better hours? Would you expect someone to stick with you if you uprooted for an opportunity? Would you “consider it” if given the chance and tell your love interest? Would you expect them to change their life/lives around? It’s pretty crappy that you’re asking these dumb questions when if the roles were reversed and you were him right now, what would you do? Skip town without warning and call when ya get there and say “hey just to let you know I moved and could’ve told ya sooner!”? Don’t be selfish. Selfishness is ugly.