Thoughts about having a threesome?

My husband, while we were drinking Mother’s Day weekend, stated when asked that his ultimate fantasy would be to have a threesome, but the focus is on me. Hmmm. I’m a super jealous person, and as much as this is enticing, I have thoughts. Last night we talked about it; I explained I’m unsure how to go about this, kinda unsure if I would want to actually fully commit to saying yes and following through. I brought up my thoughts and concerns, and ladies, my husband is amazing and super understanding. There is no pressure what so ever and he could care less if we made it a reality; hence it is a fantasy. Would you? Could you? If you are a jealous person, how do you handle and put that feeling away? Liquor is a liquid charge, right. And how do you find that person? It’s not like you can just walk up to some random person and say, hey, wanna jump in the bed with my hubby and me lol I am VERY clear this would not be a person we are friends with; I don’t. Want them around after is that wrong?? What are your thoughts here? Does it hurt your relationship? Does it make it better? Please help with opinions, lol

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Don’t do it…. If you’re a jealous person now it will be much worse afterwards. Believe me. You’ll agree and think you can do it but after it will always be in your mind and it will eat away at your happiness. You’ll begin to doubt his attraction to you and you’ll begin to fight. You will most likely ruin your marriage. Tell him, Fantasizing about it is normal for most males but it will not happen with you. Tell him you don’t want to ruin your relationship or effect your feelings. I’d never ever allow this in my marriage, because I know my love for my husband and know I could never see him with someone else. Just for fun or not. I’d not be able to handle it.

In the end it’s your marriage and your choice. Just tread lightly and consider the consequences.

So I was the one who wanted a threesome, and brought it up in a similar manner to my husband when talking about fantasies. He had been cheated on in his last relationship and it was a touchy subject. We’d talk about it in bed every once in awhile (usually he would start this conversation/roleplay) and not very long after we decided to take an out of town trip, we went to the bar, I danced with a few girls, we had drinks and I asked if one wanted to go back with us. It was fun and we talk about it in bed every once in awhile but haven’t gone back to that place yet. (A few kids later makes it a little difficult to plan trips away haha) but my point is it’s doable as long as you overly communicate and make sure there’s strict boundaries. If he or I wasn’t feeling it at any time we had a bale out plan, we knew it was never to be planned without the other one every step of the way and it was never going to be anyone we knew or could run into in the grocery store. Good luck on whatever you choose!

In general I’m a jealous person and as much as I would enjoying bringing other people in thr bedroom I know that’s not an option for me because of that jealousy. Even if I got some liquid courage and done it, I feel like it would come back to bite me in the ass once I sobered up. I think anytime there is even a slight bit of jealousy its a recipe for disaster

I just need to say. I have been with my husband for over 10 years now, we’re 28 years old. We have had so much fun over the years , you don’t have to fuck the other person In order to have a 3sum? You guys are all overlooking it. I’m a super Jealous person as well, but it’s super fun, we have had a couple join us, we have had 3sums with our guy bestfriends, and with my new female friends… :heart: it’s all about trust and setting boundaries… our rules are, we don’t kiss or fuck the other people. I make out with other girls tho as my hubby loves it and I enjoy it it’s always a good time :wink:

Sometimes things are just fantasies and that’s ok! :slight_smile: for the hubs and I, we are making it a reality. It’s mainly for me, as I just came out as bi and hubs is supportive of it and wants me to be happy. But also it’s hot for me to imagine him with another girl so :rofl:

I’m also a super jealous person but have been thinking about asking my partner if he wants a 3some too. It’d be more for me as I’m attracted to the idea of me with another woman and having him watch. But I know it wouldn’t be fair to ask for me to get all the action and be the only one allowed to step out of our monogamy. I guess I’d give you the same advice I’m telling myself. Don’t do it unless 100% sure it won’t ruin your relationship. A 3some is good for one night but is it worth risking what you have with your partner if you can’t get past it afterwards?

the only advice i can offer here…

  1. only do it if both want to do it…
  2. its better to be someone who isnt a friend…
  3. if you do it dont do it when had a drink… as you can wake up the next day and hate yourself for it (take it from someone who done it under the influence and i felt shitty the next day because of it)

I am a swinger… i have a partner of 3 years who is also a swinger… so we both dont do the jealousy thing… I’ve had 3somes in the past (2 men and 2 women) … some hurt my relationship some didnt… the ones that hurt my relationship was just down to both of us at the time doing it for the wrong reasons.

Being jealous i would suggest you don’t do it and leave it as a fantasy as being jealous is can hurt things in your relationship.

If you do both chat about it and do decide to go ahead with it… i would suggest looking at swinging clubs or a swinging site… but i will say now they can be rather full on…

Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. Thoughts about having a threesome? - Mamas Uncut

Absolutely not. But if you’re considering it, add a man as your third. See if your selfish husband is cool with that.

Short Answer.
My husband and I did a Threesome with another Man about 2 months ago.

It almost ruined our 12 year marriage. Never again.

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That’s my husbands fantasy as well lol with another girl but yeah I’d have to be super high to do something like that. Definitely not while I’m sane!

Alcohol does NOT help the jealousy. It intensifies it. In my experience. Also: if you feel like you would be jealous in the least I highly do NOT recommend this.

No desire to have another man/woman in my bed other than my partner. No thanks!

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I could never! Once I know my man has touched another person I could never look at them the same.

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It will ruin everything trust

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I would suggest keeping it a fantasy it could very well ruin the relationship you have together. You already state whoever it is you don’t want them around ever again. Adding someone to the most intimate part if your lives could just mean problems may it be a man or a woman you invite in I don’t suggest it.

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Okay being the third person here I did it when I was younger and never again me being the third person I almost ruined a marriage cause the guy got feelings for me they had kids I ended up going separate ways and walked away not about to be a homewrecker don’t get me wrong it’s okay to experiment but just make boundaries cause if not could get messy

That’s the best way to ruin your marriage.

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May be fine for bf/gf if you want to be open minded I suppose, but marriage is different.

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3sums… Are for ppl who dont love eachother

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It will ruin everything in your life.
I would just leave it a lone and just let it be a fantasy.
Women and men have fantasy all the time , however some don’t go through it because they know it will hurt their relationship and if there are kids in the pic .
Then it will hurt the kids also.

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My suggestion is simply don’t do it because once you do it there will definitely be consequences could be good or could be bad. I would just not follow through BUT, only you know how you would feel and you are the one who has the final decision on to do it or not do it. Ponder it before doing it once it’s done there is no going back and undoing any damage it may cause. Use CAUTION!!!

Well it’s takes special kind of people to handle these things. I say go for it. Explore possibilities @ swingerzonecentral.com

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Threesomes are for people who both want it . It can’t be one or the other . It’ll never work for a jealous person

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Sometimes you open the door for the devil he doesn’t leave when you want him to…

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Honestly dont do it because just by reading this post you will not recover from this
This will mentality kill you once the deed is done because this would only work if you and your partner go in as a unit I know people who have done it and still have a strong relationship still today but your not for it so dont force it lol

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If you’re not 100% comfortable with it, it WILL ruin your relationship. Not everyone is that comfortable with their partner.

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NEVER do it if you care about your relationship and want it to last!! He’s basically asking you if he can be with another women while you watch…lol… Huge red flag!

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No. Because at some point you would be watching her give him attention and vise versa and that’s something you can’t unsee. If it is something you are really wanting to explore, I would suggest going to a strip club and get a couples lap dance. And see how it makes you feel.

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I’ve been on the otherside and I wouldn’t let him be the deciding factor if you pick someone. You be the main to chose and you can get his input but you need to be comfortable and attracted. You can set boundaries like no kissing on the mouth or stuff like that. Since you are a jealous person you just have to weigh if you’ll be fine later on. I’ve had good experience and bad being the third where the husband and wife fully trusted and everything went and still goes on smooth and where there’s lack of trust and everything blows up.

What a stupid question, you cannot be serious? This is all B.S

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Dont do it believe me it will ruin ur marriage nd if ur a jealous person it wont end well!!

Only if you’re comfortable with it! And don’t feel bad if you don’t do it because I’m sure there’s plenty of women out there that has a fantasy about having someone who is bigger…. Lol anyways only do it if you’re 100% ok with it. If he loves you then he will respect your input on this!

DONT DO IT! if you were single and wanting to explore yeeesssss do it !! It’s honestly an amazing experience but NOT while you’re in a relationship. Only time it’d work being in a relationship is if you’re 100% comfortable with the idea and no jealousy, from your post it doesn’t sound like a good idea for you.

If you are a jealous person the thought shouldn’t cross your mind. There is no going back once it’s done.

Turn it around. Tell him you’ll only do it if you can have another man join at some point. Bet he will change his mind real quick :rofl::woman_shrugging:

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Wow. What a bunch of closed minded comments!! My husband and I have been together for 17 years. We enjoy exploring and trying new things including threesomes. Yes, you and your husband need to be on the same page with things and fully trust each other…as a matter of fact, we have gotten so much closer since our first threesome. It’s not for everyone but the fact that he’s open and talking to you about it shows your trust for each other. Good luck!

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Dont do it! It will build tension and resentment twords the person who really enjoys it. It will ruin your sex life

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NOPE. I have a friend who is a swinger with her husband. We were talking about their lifestyle and all I can’t think about is “what if your husband ends up liking her more?” Or what if you like someone else more than your husband? That takes a serious mind set and serious trust. I couldn’t do it. Nobody touching my man but me and vice versa lol

Nope don’t do it… I have a friend who did it. The relationship was destroyed.

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Your husband wants a threesome tell him that’s fine it’ll be you him and another man and then that will break him right then he won’t want a threesome!!! Most men wanna woman not another man

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I only do threesomes with people I don’t love. If I love u I ain’t sharing.

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I’m greedy with mine and would never share him with anyone else.

Won’t go there opening a can of worms.Its a sin and you would for ever be sorry. Thats what being married is all about being with your husband and no one else.

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According to research couples who engage in threesome end up breaking up

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Ask him this question, would he be open to a threesome with another man and him being the focus? I’ve seen threesomes happen in relationships many times and 99% of them have ended in divorce

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It’s a slippery slope.
Revisit your wedding vows.
You will technically be cheating on your husband. It doesn’t matter if it’s with his permission or not. And you would be condoning it for him.

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Personal perspective here don’t do it, you will regret it long after the bed sheets have been changed.

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Don’t do it! I have friends who have done it thinking it would add excitement to their marriage, they are all divorced now!

The fact you have the doubt is the answer in itself… don’t do it!!!

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I am a jealous person and in my experience it ruined our relationship

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Don’t do it. It will ruin your relationship

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Threesomes are meant for single people with no strings attached

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There is nothing wrong with threesomes. Its not a sin. If you were to go down that road even just to try it. You have to be comfortable with what may or may not happen. Talk about it til your blue in the face. Set ground rules. You and only you can make this kind of decision. You can ask who ever you want but there option dont really matter. You have to ask your self can you handle it are you ready to throw someone into the relationship even for one night. There are groups on fb for that kind of stuff. Like i said you have to be very sure that is something you want. You cant let no one pressure you. Make a list pros and cons. Take cheating out the equation because it is something you both agree on and agree to what ever rules you have. Everyone has an option but urs is the only one that matters.

Coming from someone who has had more than one threesome with both males and females, it has to be done with very clear rules that you don’t waiver on. If you and your husband have complete trust in one another it can be very exciting and a lot of fun. The biggest problem, even with absolute trust and clear rules, is the third person. They have to completely understand their role. You will find men and women who think this means you ate looking to replace what you have when in actuality you’re looking to enhance what you have.

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If you even have a tiny ounce of regret, don’t do it! Also if you’re jealous even a little bit…. Don’t do it.

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An object in possession seldom retains the same charm that it had in pursuit. Tread carefully!

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I had a 3 three some with a man I was in A long term relationship with. I was truly in love with him. And it was the worst most hurtful thing I do not recommend doing this with a man you love. But to each their own.

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Buy one of those life like dolls

go to the mustang ranch

Don’t do it. You said you’re a jealous person. Trust me when I tell you that you cannot watch the person you love please the next female. That shit can end tragic even when agreeing to it. Don’t do it. That shit can cause the perfect relationship to end.

Try it…if you don’t like it you don’t have to do it again.

Usually always turns out bad.

Nope. If you doubt it right out the gate, nope.

Me and my man have talked about it, I had said sure at one point then changed my mind and he was fine with that

It’s varies from relationship to relationship. Really it all falls back on trust and how strong the relationship currently is. I had someone ask my fiancé and I the same questions when it came to this topic in their relationship and we basically told them “once you open that door it’s open. You can never fully close it after it’s been opened.” It can cause trust issues if you’re jealous. It can make some people think that the rules of what qualifies as cheating in your relationship changes. It’s really only a decision you guys can make together. If you aren’t comfortable with it and aren’t being pressured to do it then don’t do it. Maybe later down the road you’ll wanna try it. Maybe you won’t. No one else can really give you definite answers to the questions you’re asking because everyone is different and every relationship is different. Go with your gut on things like this.

Can only hurt the relationship no matter how good it was because it’s always with you and it’s definitely not on my bucket list.

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Honestly it seems like you’re thinking about it more then him now :rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl: Hell nah my man belongs to me and me only. This aint elementary, I don’t share!!

Doubt the relationship be the same… I’d keep it as a fantasy…

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Almost that exact scenario ruined my 1st marriage. :woman_shrugging:t3: I wouldn’t do it.

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Perhaps I’m a closed-minded and jealous type. But I don’t get it, if you truly love someone. Having her/him alone is all enough. That threesome wouldn’t even been a thing. Anyway I don’t feel its right for you to go along with things that are giving you doubts and worries. Don’t force and hurting yourself to please someone else if it’s only gonna give you regrets in the end.

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Mine asked me. I said yes as long as it was with another man not a woman and he was like no way so I said that’s your answer. He never asked again :rofl:

Nooooooo ,y would u want or allow ur husband to sleep with another woman??! Even if it there and participating, especially if it a very jealous person. U wouldn’t want to c how another woman would b pleasing him or him pleasing her. There would b afterthoughts about her… I would never do it n thankfully my bf says he doesn’t need one. Only more of a risk for disease

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I would keep it a fantasy!

If you’re not automatically on board then don’t do it. You’re already in your head about it… imagine how you’d be after

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No! No! No! It’s so wrong on all levels. What is the point of taking your marriage vows when your other half now wants a threesome! He may end up wanting the other party rather than stay with you. Do you want to risk your relationship?

Since this place seems to be where these silly questions will be posted here’s what I’ll say. If u want to do it, go ahead and look on Craigslist. There’s a bunch of freaky people looking for freaky situations. Hope this helps. Now can we talk about nails or at see some pics of nails. SMH.

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I could never ever do it. I couldn’t ever cope with seeing my man touch or be with anybody else and I know if I ever did I wouldn’t be able to forget about it :woozy_face: it’s a definite no go for me I’d probably end up in prison​:rofl::rofl::rofl:

Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. Thoughts about having a threesome? - Mamas Uncut

Don’t do it. You can never get the images of his hands on someone else out of your mind.

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Bring a man instead of a woman into this and let’s see how the hubby feels…

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You only live once and there is always counseling…

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Oh god. Divorce… asshole

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I can be fun if the rules are understood beforehand. Whatever they may be in your personal realm. Js

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If you’re jealous now I would guess that it will play on your mind after. Don’t do it unless you’re fully ready and at peace with the idea of seeing your husband have sex with another woman. Alcohol will not serve in this situation because what about when you sober up? Join a group like That Sex Group

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“He could care less” lol yeah ok! He wants to sleep with other women. That’s the bottom line here. Wake up.

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Yeah from my experience and that of my friends it never ends well
If your a jealous type I would stay away from the idea
I only know one couple out of like 10 that stayed together after a threesome, and he has affairs behind her back a fair bit
My ex was very keen for me to sleep with his friends… and got very angry when I would object… after we split he came out as being gay! :flushed:
Fantasies are fine and healthy, but to
Act on them isn’t always a good idea

Nope :-1: heard many acquaintances /friends - most negative outcomes regardless of male/female as the extra 3 person ;”( - HIV,aids,stds, no way not risking anything

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You don’t want them around after… but she’s forever gunna be in his head. Lol. He’s telling you what you want to hear. LMAO :woman_facepalming:

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If you are the jealous type but still want to have a threesome, make it 2 males and 1 female.

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Cheating is cheating

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If your a jealous person it won’t ever work. Wouldn’t advise it… also once the liquid courage is gone the next day is that something you will be at peace with…

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Don’t do it…. If you’re a jealous person now it will be much worse afterwards. Believe me. You’ll agree and think you can do it but after it will always be in your mind and it will eat away at your happiness. You’ll begin to doubt his attraction to you and you’ll begin to fight. You will most likely ruin your marriage. Tell him, Fantasizing about it is normal for most males but it will not happen with you. Tell him you don’t want to ruin your relationship or effect your feelings. I’d never ever allow this in my marriage, because I know my love for my husband and know I could never see him with someone else. Just for fun or not. I’d not be able to handle it.

In the end it’s your marriage and your choice. Just tread lightly and consider the consequences.

Get an escort, pay someone instead of picking up someone, that would probably help with the jealousy side.
But men never do this for “you”, otherwise you wouldn’t have to think twice about it. Of course it’s for him, he brought it up, he suggested, he’s offering to you as a present for you is just putting the final decision and pressure back in your court. But once they suggest it, you never hear the end of it

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Do not let the devil in your bedroom. Just saying. Hell no.

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I like threesomes both ways its fun and hott seeing others get off… If you are jealous person i don’t recommend just keep it a fantasy.

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Don’t do it. There are other ways of getting close and him pleasing another women is not one of them

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I know someone who had a threesome and the lady ended up falling in love with the other guy. Marriage died and they divorced. I would never do it myself. My husband used to talk about it till I said two guys? Hell yeah I’m down for that! He has never talked about it since.

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Hire a high class escort that sees couples… she will know how to handle the situation and make you totally comfortable. It will definitely spice up your marriage. If your secure with your partner I say hell yea. Key is to make sure you don’t know her. Make a trip out of it… Vegas is always fun. I would tell her you want the focus on you and she doesn’t even have to have sex with your husband. My guess is your husband will be so turned on that he won’t even last long and it will make your session super intense with just each other…