I have four kids ranging from 15-1 and have Implanon in, yet I just found out I’m pregnant haven’t been to Dr yet side not my best friend has been trying to adopt a baby for over a year I don’t think I can mentally handle another child but not sure I could watch someone else raise my child either. Guess just looking for advice or opinions, please
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If you feel you cannot handle another then this is a great option if you think you can do this. <3
I put my son up for adoption and he’s with a wonderful family. It’s really hard to accept once you do it but it gets easier every day. It’s definitely not an easy choice but it’s your choice to make no one else’s.
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If you feel you can do it then do it.
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i had a daughter 1st was told i couldnt have any more so we adopted 2 boys then had 3 kids in 3yrs but i must say u will make some person the happiest person in the world if u can do it i admire ppl that do it
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I totally wish someone would do this for me… I want another but had hell of a time getting my daughter almost 8byeara ago now
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I’m currently pregnant and doing open adoption. I have a 2 year old and 3 year old and we left a domestic violence relationship 6 months ago. My littles are still traumatized and I feel like bringing a new born into the mix will make it harder u have to do what’s best for you ur kids and family. It’s definitely hard but I’m glad I found someone who I now have a great bond with and wants to keep it open.
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I will adopt your baby:cry:
do whatever’s best for you hun.
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Adoption is a true gift but having the ability to watch someone else watch my baby would be too much for me to bear. A closed adoption might be worth considering.
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I myself am adopted, and I have never had any desire to meet my birth parents. But I am thankful that I was given the chance to grow up in the Amazing family I have . That being said I personally do not feel as if I would be able to give my child up. It is a huge decision you have facing you I wish you all the best in wherever direction you take
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Keep your baby. You can do this!
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The most selfless gift you can give.
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Not to be THAT person. But there are other options other than adoption and keeping it. .especially if you were on birth control and definitely didn’t want nor plan this.
But if you know in your heart you can’t do that choice, give it a few months. Sit with the pregnancy awhile. See how you feel then.
And if after that you still feel like you can’t can’t keep the baby, do the adoption:)
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I feel you might regret the decision to give up your child later on, your child will wonder why you kept the others and not him/her. If you think you may mistreat the child due to not wanting him/her then adoption would be the right choice.
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Maybe you could let your BFF adopt and “coparent” so to speak.
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Please message me i been through adoption in 2016 I’m here if u want to talk
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If your going back and forth on not knowledgeable what you want. I suggest sit down and think real hard the pros and the cons
I had a hysterectomy last year and wished I wouldn’t have… all my kids are 18 and older so I am a empty nester I would love to have another baby to spoil it!!!
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That would be an amazing gift to your friend. Honestly. And you being honest with yourself and being open about the possibility of not being able to care for the child, says a lot about your character. I’d give it a lot of thought. And forsure would consider your friend. Knowing you’ll still be able to see the child, what him or her grow SHOULD warm your heart. You are stronger than u know. And by doing the NON selfish thing, u are amazing for that. Do what is best for the child not your own self comfort. That is what it is all about. Goodluck
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I have 6 god gives you blessings you just adjust to your fitting you could figure it out
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Adoption is good but you have to be mentally prepared for anything and everything. It is hard because it’s not an easy choice, some days are harder then others as you will always wonder if you made the right choice. I wish you the best of luck and you do whatever best for you and your family. Also if you can reach out to a support group.
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At the end of the day you need to do what you’re most comfortable with. What decision would be the best decision for you
We all go through phases and doubts and many can overcome it and be grateful. If that isn’t you / if there’s more to it than just doubts - that’s okay !
If you feel like adoption is an option… then bless your heart ! I hope you have support to help you navigate whatever choice you decide on. If you need to vent pm me.
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You’ve already decided momma. blessing come when we lest expect them.
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You sound indecisive. Which is not a bad thing. You have some time to make a decision. I would strongly suggest an adoption therapist. You need to think this all the way through before you make a choice.
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I never was pregnant, but just do what you feel is right for yourself and your unborn baby. Don’t sacrifice/exhaust your mental health because you feel pressured to have the baby or to give it up for adoption.
I wish you the best of luck with whichever decision you decide on.
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If you don’t think you can mentally handle raising another baby I think that allowing your friend to adopt the baby would be a great choice. You know the baby would be well taken care of and you could still be in their life.
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Witness protection after the adoption?
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I gave my 1st child up, hardest thing I’ve ever done but I couldn’t handle a child right then.
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I gave my son up for adoption in 2016 its hard at first. I aint gonna lie though holidays and birthdays are SUPER hard
Give yourself a little time to think it over…some of the mental issues and indecisive feelings that you are currently dealing with could be hormonal. But if you continue to feel this way just do whatever is best for your baby!
HUGS!
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although my girls were older when i adopted them my family welcomed them as though they were my biological children make adoption an option i pray that you get professional help before making a decision 
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There are many different types of adoption now including open and closed.
It may also make sense not to adopt too close to home.
Talking this out with a counselor may help you decide what route you want to go.
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I’d take some time to think more but i think it’s amazing that your best friend is an option! You can at least see the baby but also know who has baby and know it’s loved.
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That’s would amazing gift. BUT if you can be mentally prepared for this act , imo don’t if you value the friendship. Imo I wouldn’t mention it till you are 1000%.
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This group is a great resource
I think if you could do it, You would be giving them the best gift on the world.
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I was 14 when I got pregnant. I was not mentally prepared and my home life was not good. My cousin and her husband could not have children. My parents and I made the choice to let them adopt her. I am now 44, watched her grow up from afar. Do what is best for the child. If you think that the child will have a better life with another loveing family that desperately wants to have a child then do it. It is a very difficult thing to do. I still have a hard time 30 years later, but I know that she had a better life because of it.
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How about an open adoption?
You may have to get his consent for adoption. I personally think it would be hard to see my child being raised even by my best friend, but that is totally your choice. If it feels 100% right, I’d listen to that.
I unexpectedly became pregnant at 20, it destroyed a relationship bc I couldn’t cope with it, yet I still look at that child with absolute love. It’s called responsibility. Something society has been manipulated to neglect, in my opinion. We’re all free to choose, but with that choice comes repercussions. You do what you feel best. You’re the only one that will have to answer on judgment day. Just try to remember, to every action, there is a reaction. Responsibility is a part of life.
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Get fixed or keep your legs closed
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Adoption can be a wonderful thing
And you are stronger than you know
Make the best choice for you and baby.
Thank you for choosing life for your child
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Just give yourself some time to think, adoption is final and once it’s final it’s final. At any point the adoption can be closed.
If you do decide to go ahead and do an adoption plan sure if it’s someone you know that is 
what you’re ready for.
Do you have the the resources to parent if you decide to keep the baby and if you don’t please reach out I’ll be glad to get you those resources.
Please feel free to reach out if you need anything.
God never gives us more than we can handle!
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My dream is to adopt another baby that is semi close to me so the family can still see the baby
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I think it would be a great gift but often ask myself of I could accept that it would be their child and I have absolutely no say in how they raise the baby…
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As an adoptive parent I counciled a pregnant mom to give up her baby so she could be a better mom to her 1st child. It was an open adoption with a couple she chose.
My sister in law just had her surprise baby today she is my husband sister 
she has 6 kids now the oldest is 18 
she wasn’t ready and very very scared but all and all very happy she followed threw myself I found out I was pregnant two and half month after my third child was born 
I’m scared to admit the things I even thought about doing because I was afraid … he is now 4 this month and god has been by my side the entire time I was scared because I was already drowning in house work bills lack of personal hygiene time ect ect ect I just didn’t see how I could mentally do it all never forget the fear and how i was so wrong ! Not only was he my easiest baby ever we wouldn’t know what do to if he wasn’t with use !! My children were amazing with him all around everything changed the day he was born I’m talking miracles my finances got amazingly better my children are angels ( normally pushing mom to the point of no return ) my personal life have never been better The big one out of no where I got help I have no family no friends nothing and threw thin air someone came from the blue to help !!
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I could mentally handle an abortion much easier than an adoption.
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Risky, I think you would regret it later.
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Only you know what’s best for you and your family
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Personally I don’t think I could handle adopting out to someone as close to me as my best friend. I would find someone else. It would be incredibly kind to give your baby to your best friend, but I could also see it causing emotional turmoil and possible issues in your relationship with her.
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Adoption is a wonderful choice. You would be blessing a couple who want a baby but can’t have one of their own.
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I know I wouldn’t be able to give my baby up for adoption
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Personally, if I were to give up a child, it would have to be to someone I didn’t know, and I would never adopt from someone I know. I feel that a preexisting relationship between birth and adoptive parents can lead to frustration and a lot of crossed boundaries (birth parents thinking they have a say in parenting choices, adoptive parents expecting babysitting or financial assistance from birth parents if they come upon hard times, etc.) But that’s just my opinion.
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This is a HUGE decision, my honest opinion, find a therapist and speak with him or her, as well as your partner. Only you and your partner/spouse can decide what is the best option for you and your baby. And whatever way you decide to go, you will have a professional helping you through what can and most likely will be a really emotional process. Whatever you decide, I wish you the best.
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I felt like this when I was pregnant with my 5th. Our family needed him and I needed him♡ Best wishes.
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Yes its scary…but honestly you need to take time and make sure your comfortable with ur decision. We had 8 kids (combined family) when we found out #9 was coming. Yes its crazy busy but i wouldnt change it 1 bit.
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Adoption would be a wonderful choice. One of my best friend has prayed for a baby for years and has even started a cedar chest because she is just not going to give up on her dream of having a child even tho she knows she is not able to conceive and the only way her dream will Come true is thru adoption… If u chose to go that route you would be blessing a couple more than u would ever know… praying for you and this very difficult decision that you are facing.
I’d like to think if I ended up pregnant unwanted that I’d be able to let someone adopt the child but honestly I think I’d probably change my mind a hundred times and end up keeping it any way. I’m pro choice but I don’t think I could have an abortion. I don’t know what your thoughts on that are but it might be easier on you. You have to do what is best for your family. It would be such an amazing gift to give to your friend but it would probably be easier to go with someone you don’t know. You have some time to think about it. Talk to a therapist, your spouse, your friends. Make sure you are 100% sure that you are making the right choice.
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I had 2 boys already and ended up pregnant not long after a divorce. I gave the baby up for adoption and it was honestly the hardest thing I have ever done and I regret it everyday. It is an open adoption and I know he has an amazing life but it is still very very hard. Good luck with whatever you choose
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You just gotta sit and think it fully through. My bff, if she wanted a child and I could, I would for her. I actually thought it out. You have to come to the full awareness and okay was that you most likely at some point have an issue with how she’s raising it, but know to mind your business.
I personally couldn’t do it, stranger or a friend… maybe you should wait till the baby is born and see how you feel then. Btw you need to see your OBGYN because with those types of BC you have a higher chance of having an atopic (tubal) pregnancy.
I can’t even imagine having to make this decision. Adoption is an amazing opportunity for parents that may otherwise not be able to have children. It is one of the most loving and selfless decisions that a mother will ever have to make. Good luck mama and do what is best for your family. Don’t listen to those that will judge you❤
Maybe an adoption with someone you dont know… But i think regret would set in otherwise. 
Good luck with whichever you choose. (Coming from a mom who can’t have anymore)
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Only you know what’s best for you, but i will say, think on it for a while, you don’t have to make a decision this second.
And secondly, if you chose adoption, make sure your sure. Don’t just flip a coin (I literally know someone who did that)
I think adoption is one of the most selfless things you could do for person or couple who’s only desire is to have a child of their own to love. I can’t imagine the strength it would take to choose adoption and I have so much respect for the women who made that choice. I don’t know about the friend because I don’t know your relationship dynamic with her, but do what you feel like the right thing for you and the baby whether it’s her or another woman. Good luck to you with whatever you decide.
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I’m so glad and want to thank you for NOT mentioning abortion as an option. God bless you and your unborn child.
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My fiance and I had this convoy yesterday I wouldn’t be able to give up a child but wouldn’t be able to mentally or physically handle giving birth again…he has family who struggle with having babies they have one child due to fertility help we taked and I would probably let them have my fertilized egg. I think it helps that her and I look ALot aike like I’m taking her own husband mistook me for her one christmas which we all laugh about and our children always run up to the other going mom.
You already have 4. That’s your child! It gets better. I have 5 and I wouldn’t ever regret having any of them!
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Trust me. Keep the child. You will thank yourself years down the line.
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I totally think you can do it you are a strong mom, a brave mom, and I felt this way with my third I was scared until I birthed her. Then all my fears went away and it was filled with love blood,sweat, and some tears and a great support system. It’s truly up to you to decide if you would have a family adopt or choose to raise it. But is women are stronger then we think!
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Youre asking for advice and others’ thoughts… here goes. adoption is a beautiful thing. A family adopting a baby when they cannot have their own is probably one of the best feelings, and would be such a selfless act on your part to make sure your baby has the best life. Now, giving your baby to your friend, that may be a little hard to watch that child grow up so closely to you. The child will also have many questions and you will have to face them being relatively close. Your older children may not be very happy watching you go through the pregnancy and then suddenly the baby is given to your friend.
Here is a thought of encouragement. I had a set of twins after i already had 3 small children who none of them were twins. Completely unexpected. But such a beautiful and wonderful gift. I too mentally struggle some days with 5 children. When I first learned I was having twins, I lost it. Thought I wouldnt be able to do it. I cried for days. I also prayed a lot. They are 6 months old now and somehow, ive made it to now even when I thought I couldnt. My point is, give yourself more credit. You can do this mama! At the end of the day, whats one more? 
good luck in whatever you do!
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My oldest son was adopted into another family. It was due to safety reasons and dv. It’s hard because I feel bad for doing it but at the end of the day I know I did right to keep him safe. If you do adoption maybe do an open adoption and that way you and siblings can still know baby versus closed adoption where you don’t get to know about the child
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We don’t know you, or your situation so I don’t think we’re the best to give advice with this. Personally, I think that adoption with your friend, would end up causing you so much pain further down the line. But I think it’s so wonderful that that even crossed your mind! You don’t need to make a decision right now, you have time. Discuss with your partner, speak to your friends and your support network. You’ll make the right decision for that baby, for you, and your family as a whole, in the end xxx
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Is it not better to let a friend adopt who is unable to get pregnant who you know will take the best care of the child rather than a stranger.
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Abortion is an option
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If you are not sure you could watch your friend bring up your baby and still can’t look after it then don’t do it put the baby up for adoption away from you or could you ask for it to be fostered untill you get your life straight?
Honestly I think a friend might be too close of a placement
You will have to fight your maternal instincts nonstop
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Whatever you do…I advise not giving your best friend your baby.
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What about the babies dad?? But That child will always have a thought in back of head “why not me. Why she keep other 4 kids but not me” it could mentally break a child once they r old enough to realize she adopted and why. Especially if ur best friend get her/him. Just my opinion. My SD has the same thoughts. Her birth mom left her at 3 days old. Who has 5 kids total and got rid of her oldest. My SD. And kept 3 of her kids. my husband ex wife raised her for 9 yrs and one day left with 2 of her siblings (they divored N had 2 kids together) and never look back for her. Yes she is with her dad but mentally and emotionally she’s hurting… my opinion.
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If you cant support the baby then do adoption. I suggest you get your tubes tied to.
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I would go to an adoption agency to see if they have a support group and therapist you can talk to so you can have all the information before you decide plus support if you do decide to go with adoption. My past friend gave up her son for adoption when he was 3, she gave him to my mom to raise in the mean time because she just wasn’t ready to be a parent. I think she made the best decision for her son. It was a selfless decision giving him to a family who were ready and waiting for him good luck!
Oh mama.
You are so brave to reach out. So selfless.
We are looking to adopt and are currently taking all the trainings.
We are not quite ready- we just have a few more pieces to put in place.
We have envisioned a child around 5 yo come into our lives and complete our family.
However, an infant could be that child as well.
Feel free to pm me and tell me more if your story.
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Personally I couldn’t do it but to each it’s own. You have to do what’s best for the child
I think you have to do what you have to do. Allowing a friend or family to take the babe on will allow you a relationship still and that would be nice
Please raise your baby yourself no matter what no one is better than own mom be on the shoes of that baby and try to feel it
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I was adopted at a week old, and my aunt adopted my cousin as a baby as well.
It’s a good option if you feel that you can’t raise another baby. You would just have to decide if your mentally
Prepared to see the baby often and not think of him/ her as “your own”
I think adoption would be hell for me, letting go that is. I’ve been in your situation…I have 4. Lots of people are against abortion but in my situation it was best for me, & I had no regret but lots of relief! Weigh all your options hun, because it’s YOUR choice.
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Are you against abortion? Because if so then I would say give the baby up for adoption and let your friend adopt. Then you’ll know the baby is safe and happy and you’ll still have an aunt like relationship with it
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How wonderful to consider adoption for this baby.
So many couples would be so happy to be able to adopt
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I’m pregnant with my 5th…have the baby and take care of it!!! Or get an abortion!!
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You have other options, and you have every right to explore all of them thoroughly.
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I got prego on bc. I was sure i couldnt handle it being my 1st baby was only 8 months old. I was terrified.
Now i cant imagine my life without both of my daughters and she knew we needed her before i even did
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1st thing don’t listen to the negative people. It’s a hard choice but it is your choice. Adoption is a beautiful thing and giving someone who isn’t able to have a child of their own a child to love is an amazing gift. It will not be easy. But if you know the child would have a better more stable life then adoption is always an option. It’s a selfless act. Don’t stress momma you got this. Your hear will tell you what to do.
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Do what your heart tells you.
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I think adoption is wonderful i have 4 kids I feel I would do the adoption route if I were in your shoes and if your friend is trust worthy I’d say it be a blessing you’ll still be able to see the baby watch the baby grow and your friend will finally be a mama like she wants
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I’m adopted have been since 1.5 years old . I was adopted from Chile . I have had abandonment issues and a few others. I always felt like a piece of me was missing. But that all stems with who adopts the child as well . Adoption is great but overall it’s your choice not anyone else’s . I wish you the best . There are so many different types of adoption . That I am sure you could find one that would work with you and for you.
My husband was the only one of his siblings given up for adoption (he was also a rape baby) and he’s questioned why him so many times. Breaks my heart
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I’d rather watch it grow up in a safe home then send it too people I don’t know who might abuse it!
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