*Trigger warning: Child loss* Needing genuine advice

I wouldn’t be embarrassed if my name was tattooed on my parents. 🤷

I put all my kids names and they are super proud I would care enough to put there names on me, although my 14 year old says I looked mean before and the tattoos just make me look meaner :joy::rofl::joy::rofl::joy::rofl:

Your body, your choice. I have one of my daughters name and my mans name tattooed on me.

No.embarassing would be their name across your forehead or maybe like alll the way from your shoulder to your wrist

You do what you want and need to continue healing. Your boys love you and will understand if not listed because it is s Memorial to a deceased sister. If you add them then all your children. Take care of you.

I think your idea is brilliant, beautiful, and will help you to feel more comfortable explaining your scars. I have never heard of a child doing anything but loving the fact Mom/Dad have their names tattooed on them. DO IT!!!:heart: It’s your next step in healing​:heart:

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Teenagers are always embarrassed of their parents ! No matter what you do! But once they hit 20 they will appreciate it :two_hearts:

I too went thru a heart break & the only pain Tht helped me was getting a tattoo. I do have my daughters initials on my left arm w a butterfly she designed & picked out colors at age 4. She’s now 16 yrs old & proud of my tattoo cuz she helped design it. Don’t ever feel embarrased about your scars. I have many shown & not shown. They define who u r & how much u have come. Tell your story . feel proud of how far u come. Some day, your story will help.another person. I have learned this just recently as I met someone online & he heard about my daughters situation & he told his story. Was shocked as I only met him a few days , but in the end my daughter has listened & learned. U never know who u r gonna meet& may change their world for the better.

They will fade more with time, these are my cigarette burn scars after 17 years, the tattoo ink doesnt always set correct over the scars as you can see. Add your boys names to the same wrist as your daughters and let your scars remind you that you dont have to hurt yourself anymore. If anyone asks just say they are scars and leave it at that. If they press, then tell them you dont feel like discussing it.

What does your heart say? So sorry for you loss. But I would definitely do it whether they get embarrassed when their older or not. I think you should go for it momma. But ultimately it’s your decision. Follow your :heart::heart:

My mom has mine & my sisters names & I don’t mind at all. She actually had the original tat with just my name covered because it faded really bad. At first that upset me but I’ve learned to love the new tat. It does look much better than the original.

As for getting your boys names done I suggest going to a very good tattoo artist & talking to them about what can be done to cover the scars or include them in the tattoo so it doesn’t look so obvious.

go ahead and create a beautiful tattoo that includes your boy’s names and maybe your daughter’s name if you choose, let it be a statement of your strength your bravery your love of your children plan it so it covers the scars if you choose there is no right or wrong choices you do what sits best with your heart, best wishes for your future :heart:

My daughter watched me get her name done. Shes 13 [almost 14 now] and loves to show off that tat (and the others) to her friends

I’ve never heard anyone say the’ve been embarrassed by their parents tattooing their names on them. It’s a sentimental thing. I say go for it! I have all my kids and my husband on my arm. My kids don’t mind at all.

your going to tons and tons of things that will embarrass your children over your lifetime
it’s ok
they’ll still love you as you love them​:heart::slightly_smiling_face:

Get their birthdates/horoscopes/footprints/something they absolutely cannot change. They can always change their names but their birthdates are forever. That’s my only advice, I’m so sorry for your loss though, you’re such a strong woman and I’m sorry that you have to be

I would put their names . I also would tell ppl if they ask that my scars are my story and I dont want to share. My condolences to you and I am really glad that you pulled through.

Don’t ever let anyone else tell you how to feel, I lost my first daughter and it’s a heartbreak like nothing else, I got a tattoo later on of my kids names and angel wings with baby foot prints in the back of my neck, I will never regret getting this done it’s for me so everyone else can keep whatever to themselves, your strong for sharing your story and I hope you take this advise of you do whatever you need to heal, you move forward in your own time and anything you want to make yourself feel better go for it momma :heart:

My living children have a tattoo with their names. At 20 and 15 they still love it. I also have a memorial tattoo for the daughter I lost at the age of 3.

As far as drawing attention to the scars, talk with your tattoo artist about your concerns and they can guide you to a design that will minimize that effect.

I am deeply sorry for your loss.

I ABSOLUTELY think its an AWESOME idea to have ur boys names tattooed to cover some of the scars I think they will be proud that u have their names tattooed on u! Go for it!!:purple_heart::purple_heart:

I got my oldest tattooed on me with her handprints I am still getting my other 2 done as well I also have my niece tattooed on me I’d do it and if you choose not to they won’t think anything of it because the first is in memory of your daughter and where you place your boys has meaning I’d do it if it were me

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I’ve had all my kids names tatted on me and most of them are grown adults now… None if the kids are embarrassed. Do what YOU feel is what your heart nerds to help heal.

I got this for my baby in heaven and I plan to get other animals for my 2 boys animals that they love. This little turtle has helped me heal and my hubby also got a turtle and faith. It really helped us thru this hard time.

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First, I am so very sorry for your loss. Unfortunately, I know your pain, and it’s not something that will ever be healed. However, when it comes to tattoos, my personal philosophy is that I will never put anything on my body that doesn’t mean something to me. I have something for my son, and I have something for my girls. It is for my eyes, my heart and MY judgement. No one else’s. :heart:

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I am literally covered in tattoos and you bet I got my baby’s footprints with her name on me. She’s now 15 and isn’t embarrassed by me at all. She thinks they make me unique and she loves it.

I have both of my kids tattooed on my arms, I would go for it if I were you :heart:

I think it is a good idea. Maybe to make not “embarrassing” wait till they are a little older and are writing their own name and take that in and have their handwriting on your wrist instead of the artist writing it for you. I have my sons signature on my shoulder as the body of a butterfly and he just loves it

I’ve also buried one of my babies (5 years ago). Go get the tattoo.

If you want, you can get their initials or some other symbol (s) to represent the other children. Trauma recovery and healing is a lifelong process & making progress is a tremendous accomplishment. Congratulations and don’t stop growing.

I think you’re thinking too hard about it. If you want to, do it. Your kids won’t mind. I had a struggle in my life (nothing as severe as yours but a struggle none the less) and chose to put bible verses on mine.


Both my husband & myself have our son’s name tattooed on us boldly. My son does not mind. He feels honored to be represented by us & he knows hes our world. My tattoo has many meanings. The 3 charms on the right are my hubby’s, mine, & our son’s birthstones. The others are for the baby I miscarried, my grandfather, my grandmother, & our niece who was stillborn. The lotus is for overcoming my past & becoming who I am today.

I say you put it, they all mean something to you and it’s part of letting go and moving on in life. You’ll never forget your baby girl. But this way you won’t remember the pain you felt , only the good things ( well when you look at your wrists. I know it doesn’t just go away ) also, I’m sorry for your loss.

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I have my kids names on me. Large and I love it. They love it too. They got to pick the picture that goes with their names. Daughter has a princess crown and my son is a monkey butt. :slight_smile: I am proud of my tattoos (14 & counting) but those are my favorite.

I have another tattoo to cover up a self harm scar, it doesn’t draw attention to the scar at all, just make sure you have a great artist.

Im so sorry for your loss.


I have both my kids names, dob beside their footprints from the hospital. My 20 yr old son wants to have mine & his little sisters name tattooed on him. His idea.

Another loss mom here who’s gone through ptsd and depression and anxiety. I think your idea is absolutely beautiful. And with your kids growing up with you having the tattoos of their names, I don’t think they’ll be embarrassed. Even if there’s a point where they are, kids always end up embarrassed by their parents for some reason. It’s part of being a parent I think. So, if it feels like that’s what you wanna do for the tattoos, don’t let anything keep you from doing it. Besides, you can always explain everything behind it to them when they’re older, they’ll understand.


Yes ABSOLUTELY have it done. You have overcome this tragedy and now you have two beautiful little boys. Celebrate all three.

Do it!!! I have my kiddos names tattooed on me and they aren’t embarrassed. And I’m sure that when your boys are older and you tell them their sister’s story, and why you have the scars, and the reason you have their names and hers they will LOVE it!!

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The choice is yours and don’t worry about what others think. I’d you have these thoughts have you thought about having a small design instead.

I think if you want to do it then do it. They are your kids forever no matter what. My daughter is 10 and I told her I am going to get a rainbow butterfly tattoo with her name on my arm. She was super excited about it. She is my rainbow baby and I am so very proud to have her.


Do it! This is an amazingly beautiful idea! I don’t think it will draw more attention to the scars but I wouldn’t feel bad for having a rough past and doing something that not everyone understands. It’s your business to choose who you share your story with. I couldn’t imagine losing a child and am truly deeply sorry for your lost. This tattoo may even help with the healing process as well.

Go with your heart…I do not think those boys would ever be jealous of her tatted on you…heck do them all…those scars are what have made you the strong woman you are. To lose a child changes something deep deep down inside your soul. Hugs to you and your babies


I think it’s a wonderful idea. And it is special to you. Don’t overthink the rest.

I think you should do it if you feel it will help you with the healing process. No one should judge your scars either way. You have been through things no one can understand but you. There are two types of understanding: one can have a true understanding because they have been through it and then there is an understanding of what it must be like for those who haven’t. If that made sense at all but I’m trying to say no one has lived your story but you and you should do what your heart feels is best. I think either way your boys will understand when they are older if you tell them the story from your heart.

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You are the one that has to see them everyday. It’s your opinion that truly matters.

My son has my granddaughters names, it is your decision, all I can say is do what your heart tell’s you, it is your journey I’m so glad to hear that you are doing better GOD BLESS YOU.

Do what makes you happy. Put your boys names on if you want. Cover the burns with flowers, hearts or with lepord spots.
As for people asking, you are not obligated to tell them anything. You can say nothing or long story or tell them you had a skin graft while in the jungel and they used leopard skin. Oh yes, there is some thing sold over the counter to help scars. I had a bad burn on my wrist and people useto say i cut my wrist.

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My dad had all of his kids names on him and it never bothered me a bit. Even made me feel special sometimes.

So sorry for your loss. I will start with I have not lost a child so advice may come from better places. I would wait until they are older and let them decide. If they ask why you dont have a tattoo for me then an answer can be because I have you to hold everyday and her I only get to hold in my heart. You could just do dates if you think it might embarrass them to have their names on your arm.

I am in the process of getting all of my children on me I have 2 out of 6 done and they all love the idea of being a part of my body art!

To hell with what anyone else says or thinks, if you feel that it will help with everything you have been through the absolutely do it. They are your children no matter what, I highly doubt anyone in your immediate family will be embarrassed.

I have this, and I get compliments everyday. It definitely is showy and I was worried with being in retail management it may need to be covered up, but I don’t have to! It took my husband years if infertility to have our girls 19 months apart! I think you do whatever you think is best for you! My girls love their butterfly feet and I will never regret it even when they are 50!

I love the idea of you getting your boys names as a tattoo. When they get older and understand the meaning behind why you would put them on the scars they will know how much it has ment to you and your story.
Just remember they know your name not your story! It doesn’t matter what other people think about you.
God bless you and your family

Do it! I have my oldest sons initials I plan to get my youngest sons as well

Tattoo away! I have never heard of kids being embarrassed by it.


Why not just have an artist draw something up that explains to the world the reason for your scars, using your scars as art. Turn them into an emblem of courage rather than an emblem of embarrassment. They are your testimony. Use them to empower others who are going through what you’ve been through.

I have my 3 kids names and footprints on me. My oldest is 16 and she is not embarrassed and has never been. My 5 and 3 year old think they are awesome

I think getting their names on that wrist is an amazing idea

The boys will appreciate the reasons behind it.

I lost a daughter at 17 years old. There’s no right or wrong answer. The only one who can accurately answer your question is YOU! I don’t understand why everyone thinks they need strangers input on extremely personal decisions!

Your body, your choice. They’re not going to be by your wrist that much to be embarrassed by it.

I lost my daughter in 2010, so I do know how you feel and what you have gone through, figure out a tatt design with your daughter’s name that you can use as a cover up for your burn marks, god bless you sweet heart, praying for you and your sweet family

I have my older 3 kids names on me. My 3 older children are in their 20’s they are proud that I have their names tattooed. I’m wanting to get my 4yr olds name tattooed.

I’m sorry for ur lose my heart goes out to you and yes definitely get ur boys name tattoo on you

My kids would not be embarrassed and they are 17, 17 and 18.

Just do it. I’ve never even heard of a kid embarrassed of a mom with their name on them :expressionless: anyway I have mine on me and he loves it

Tattoos are meant for the person wearing them imo. If it makes you feel better or changes something in your mindset from negative to positive then do it. Dont worry about anyone else.

Do it my fiance has his kids on his wrist.

DO IT!!! Just do it. You don’t owe anyone an explanation of why. You know and that’s all that matters.

My mom has mine and my siblings names tattooed on her chest with a rose.

None of us have ever been embarrassed by it. Tbh, we hardly ever even think of it.

So it probably won’t be a big deal to them at all if you have their names. I don’t think it’s embarrassing.

However, if it makes you more comfortable you can wait until they’re a little older and ask them.

Do it and don’t worry about what anyone thinks it’s for you and only you.

Get a bracelet to cover them up Tattoo a good idea also

MY daddy had all four of his kids names on his arm.
I loved it.

I think it is a wonderful idea. I hope it helps you feel better.

Do what makes YOU happy and brings YOU peace. Scars or tattoos, YOU know what’s there and the history behind it. That’s for no one else but YOU my Dear. :heart:

I say DO IT! :sunflower::heart::blush:

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I say do it! You have come so far in your life journey :blush:

You do what you feel in your heart, your children will know you love them all!!

Wear all your childrens name proudly and with honor, Mommy.

And I am so very sorry for your loss. :heart::heart::heart:

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Do what feels right to you.

I have all my kids names tattooed on my body :woman_shrugging:t4: my oldest two are 16&15 and they don’t mind at all. It’s our thing :heart:

I have all 4 of my kids on my body tattooed. Woukdnt change it

Go for it, i don’t think they’ll hate it when they are older.

I would go for it xxx

Do what your heart tells you

I can help you love :heart: visit my page.

Both my mother and father in law have my husband’s name tattooed on themselves. My mother in law just has a small tattoo with his name, birthday, and zodiac symbol on her leg, my father in law has it in huge Celtic letters going down his forearm. My husband is 26 and isn’t embarrassed by it at all, we plan on getting our son’s name tattooed on us.

I’ve gotten tattoos over scars. It’s beautiful and freeing.

I’m sorry for your loss, and the pain you have experienced. You should get the tattoos, like you said it shows how far you’ve come with dealing with the heartache. Covering the scars doesn’t make them go away, but masks them and shows the two very special blessings who’ve helped you recover. I’d get the tattoos for your boys if I were you, they won’t be embarrassed when they are older. They will be proud to have a strong mama.


I lost my daughter and have her name tattooed on my arm. My boys are 5, 6 and 17. The younger 2 asked about it, and I told them that I have it so she’s always with me… and that I have them with me to wrap my arms around. … this is my 6 year old and he wanted a matching tattoo so I copied it with washable markers.

It’s up to you as to what you want to do or not do. I have been thinking of getting a tattoo of them on a swing with big brother pushing them, but it’s such a permanent commitment. I’m not putting their names

I am so sorry for your loss. I lost twins between my sons. I have all their names on my wrist. One son feels some sadness about my loss. The other acknowledges my loss but doesn’t feel sad about is as he came after. As they get older, you can tell them about their sister. Share happy memories and they will know your heart still loved them because a mother’s heart has room for all that she calls her own.

Absolutely do it!! Kids will know how much love you have for them and the child you lost :two_hearts::two_hearts: bodies and scars change with time for a reason :heart: sorry for the loss of you’re child mama :broken_heart:

Girl, they will be so proud to have saved there mom! Start to finish, beautiful story. Thank you for inspiring me as a mom, and not just a mom but a mom who’s kids saved her to!!! Never be ashamed to have won the fight for your life! I promise you your children won’t be!!! :two_hearts::two_hearts::two_hearts:

Im so sorry :frowning: to answer your question no I dont see them being embarrassed by it. I have none but my daughter has pestered me into getting one and even mentioned about putting their names on me ( she’s 21) I think kids at least the ones I know find it endearing

I have my daughters name and when she asked why I told her it’s bcuz of her I am where I am today. When she gets a bit older I’ll go into more details with her but she literally saved me from a self destructing life I was living. I say do it to they will understand once they get older

Follow your heart. Sit quite ask these questions and if you feel your heart expand its yes if it contracts and closes its a no.

I’m so sorry for your loss and the heart aches that will follow u for ever :heart: I know I dont have the right to tell u anything that in opinion would help since I’ve never lost a child yet! But if your anything like me read bible scriptures about losing a child that may help I do wish you the very best! And if you don’t get your boys tattooed on u they will understand cause they are still with u.

Do what feels right in your heart. No I doubt they will feel embarrassed or jealous . maybe do a leapord pattern around your scars cause it might look purposeful ? Their are some tattooers that specialize in covering self harm scars. If you feel like having their names over the scars is hurtful to your heart maybe put them on your hand or higher up your arm. Just make sure everything feels right in YOUR heart before you do it. Good luck mamas stay strong :blue_heart::blue_heart::blue_heart:

I’m so sorry for your loss. The scars will never go away, but they will be under the names of your boys. It’s the layers of the healing cycle. That’s what you needed to do to be the strong woman you are today. Get the tattoo for the boys, and when they are older, explain the scars to them.

I think if it would make your heart happy to see their names on your wrists, you should do it. Kids will forever be embarrassed by their parents so do what you feel like doing😂 I’m very happy that you have come so far, it’s truely inspiring

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you have your boys w u now so no memorial needed. scars covered by tattoos r just that. covering a scar that shows how far you’ve come is not bad in my opinion ; possibly good. Wear a bracelet on occasions that may draw attention n unwanted questions

My kids love that I have a special tattoo for each of them! Chloe, now 21 has a princess crown with her name under it, Michael, now 14 has his handprint (it was huge at age 2) and Abi (age 9) got to write her name in marker in my mermaids tail and it was then tattoo’d in. I say do it! Do it! Do it!

I have never heard of kids being embarrassed by having their name tattooed on their parent.
If it feels right for you, then I say yes, absolutely do it! I think it’s a beautiful gesture.