*Trigger warning* I just found out today my baby has no heartbeat: Advice?

They told me the same thing and I waited two weeks my baby will be 8 months this week

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Im sorry for you. Dont keep it inside. Talking about it will help. Its deeply personal. Talk when you are ready. No one will be inconvenienced by your sharing this.

I so sorry. Pray to OUR GOD. HE is listening. Your baby is an ANGEL in heaven. I am praying for you and your husband .:pray::pray::pray:

Just dont rush into a d&c leave it a week & retest. I know to many this has happened to & turns out everything was fine. I know all situations are different. Take care & all the best

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So sorry about the loss of your child. You need to talk to someone, friend family even a stranger if need be. The loss of a child is heartbreaking. I will keep you and your family in my prayers.

I miscarried almost a year ago myself. I found out at my first ultrasound that there was no heartbeat even though my previous appointment there was one. It was extremely heartbreaking. I allowed my body to miscarry on it’s own and it took forever which made we wish I took the pill instead. I’m so sorry to hear about this. It’s very difficult but you can and will get through it.
I ended up waiting to pass the baby on my own just in case the doctor’s were wrong and I was just too early


I had this happen to me several times. I’m so sorry. The best advice I can give you is to do an ultrasound and if it confirms it’s true. Definitely get a D&C. Do not let it pass naturally. I did that once and ended up bleeding out. Lost 1/2 my blood.


Its ok to cry,let it all out. You & your husband have to be strong together & love eachother & comfort eachother the best y’all can. Its not easy & you never forget that baby but know God has a plan for you & that baby is in a much better place. I’m so sorry for your loss, I lost my son in 2001 @4mos & I think of him everyday.


I also agree,definitely wait and get a second opinion I also was advised on an early D&C once and my daughter is a healthy 25 year old. I waited, checked labs and had another ultrasound and all was well. Definitely not to get your hopes up, as the outcome could still be that you have experienced a loss… but give yourself the peace of mind from second opinion. If it doesn’t work out, so sorry for your loss and know that what you are feeling is completely normal and allow yourself and spouse time to grieve. Its ok to grieve :heart:


i’m so sorry , sometimes is easier to journal it and leave it in those pages instead that staying in your head.
I hope God gives you the strength I cannot imagine the emotions going through you and your husband, just be there for each other :pray:


So sorry for your loss. I have lost 4 and one was 5 months along. It has gotten easier for me. I was blessed with 3 girls and one boy. I believe god has a reason for everything so I find comfort in that. It took a long time for me to feel ok and not cry I just took it day by day, minute by minute.


How could you not feel all these emotions? You have to do what feels right for you whether it be crying, seeing your sibling, telling people about it, or not telling . Allow yourself to grieve. My thoughts are with you.


I am so very sorry for your loss! If you have a good relationship with your sister, maybe you could tell her and then you could tell your Mom so that she has a support system as well. The three of you could talk and heal together even by long distance. I think that those closest to you would like to know and support you. GOD bless you and comfort you! I lost one at about 10 weeks. BIG HUGS


So many women have experienced this same loss. There is no shame in talking about it. Even if it makes your mom sad would be even sadder to know that you didn’t reach out to her even when you wanted to. I experienced this same thing and my mom and grandmother were sooo amazing! :heart:


I had two early losses. For me, I scheduled the D&C as soon as I could. I had a 5 year old and had to carry on for him. If you think keeping your plans will help distract you, if that will help, go. Also, no shame in sharing that you were pregnant and suffered a loss. Support is very important. I’m very sorry for your loss!!


I went through the same. Have them check hormone levels. Get the D&C asap so you don’t develop infection. Tell your family and let them be there for emotional support. I’m sorry this happened to you.

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It’s ok to be sad. Spending time with family will defiantly help and I would absolutely include them. I had 2 miscarriages that were about the same time as yours after my 3rd and 4th babies. One of them I didn’t tell anyone about but was starting to cramp and naturally loose it on my son’s bday party with all family there. I had to include them. And when it was over I felt their love and support. It made it easier. I hope you get the healing and support you need at this time.


I’m so sorry. The exact thing happened to me at 12 weeks. I opted to not have the D&C right then, my head couldn’t wrap around it. I was so afraid the Drs were wrong and missed the heart beat. About 4 weeks later, I still hadn’t aborted naturally, so I called to go in, he did one more extensive listen for me. It was definitely the hardest thing I’ve ever gone through in my life. My thoughts and prayers to you.

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I am so so sorry for this. My heart breaks for you. I was told at about 9 weeks I had one healthy baby and one baby with no heartbeat. I was devastated. I felt so bad for the remaining twin because that child was in my womb next to their dead sibling. My heart broke for the surviving twin. But by the next ultrasound which was about 3 weeks later, my dead baby had grown and today I have 12 year old twins. Give it a little but, I know from experience that doctors sometimes jump to a conclusion and they are sometimes wrong. I’ll keep you and your precious baby in my prayers.


so very sorry for you loss its very hard to lose a Child my heart is breaking for you take care of your self years ago I was expecting twins and lost one it was very hard to deal with and 21 years later I lost the other twin devastating sending you love and hugs


You cope how you cope. There is no wrong way to go through this. I had the very same thing happen with my first baby. Except, I had no one to talk to about it. My family pushed it aside and I held a lot of it in. I didn’t have a D&C though. I had to use pills, put them up myself, it didn’t take effect until a week later. I had just come home and started having horrible cramps and had my baby on the toilet. It was more traumatic than even my births with my living children. I still mourn to this day and now am able to understand what happened and cope. Take the time you need. Do what you need to do to be okay. Prayers for you and your family.


However you feel is ok and however your husband feels is ok and there’s no timer on grief. There’s no right or wrong, just be patient and be there for each other, lean on each other as much as you can. I am so sorry for your loss :frowning:


So sorry. We lost a sweet baby between 10 and 11 weeks. I had started bleeding and went to the ER. That’s where we found no heartbeat.

I would get a second ultrasound to ease your mind about a D&C. I was super scared to get one, because “what if they are wrong”. My body naturally completed the miscarriage the night before my D&C. My Dr still suggested doing it to make sure everything was cleaned out.


Went through this twice in 11 months. It’s very heartbreaking and depressing. What your feeling is normal, only a heartless person would not be effected. Had to have a DC each time, the second pregnancy was in the tube. I felt horrible as it was, but even worse after the D&C knowing they were scraping my baby out of me. There is no worse feeling then losing a child you badly wanted. To make things even worse was my doctor telling me maybe it was God’s way of telling me to save my money for my retirement days. :sleepy: At the time I had just turned 38. Make your appointment ASAP for your D&C. Don’t keep your feelings bottled up, it’s better to talk to someone about the way your feeling other then your husband as he to is suffering the loss of your precious child. God bless you!

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No one can tell you what is normal sweetheart. You will grieve on your own time and in your own ways. Don’t rush yourself. Seek loss counseling if it is necessary. I am so sorry that you and your family are going through this. There are so many ways to remember this LO and maybe some type of memory marker will help you heal. Seek help if you need it honey. You will persevere. :heart:


At 7 weeks with my first baby I found out that The heartbeat was only 70. I knew it it was under 100 it was not a viable pregnancy.So they made appointment for blood tests and told me sometime within a week happened. But it didn’t on it’s on an every day I woke up feeling like is today going to be the day. After almost a week I couldn’t take it anymore and made the appointment for my DNC. They did another sonogram right before to doublecheck that there was no heartbeat and then went in for surgery. It was such a hard time I would say however you heal and whatever process works for you just do it. Call your mom. If you know it would help you through this it is OK to share this with her I don’t know either of you but to be honest if one day she found out that you went through this without her she would probably be very upset and would’ve wanted to be there for you. It is absolutely heartbreaking and I am so sorry that you are going through this. Prayers to you your husband and your family

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You’ve gotta do what’s best for you and your family. And what other moms have done in this situation might not be for you and that’s OK. If you wanna take that trip, do it! You will NEVER stop loving that baby no matter what. And yes, all of these emotions and feeling here and there are fine and normal. Lots of love your way


What you’re feeling is completely normal. I have lost 5 babies all between 9 and 12 weeks. It hurts. Please talk about it. Its more common than we know. You’d be surprised how many women you know have suffered at least one miscarriage. It’s been a hush hush subject and it shouldn’t be. Grieve. Cry. Do what you need to do. Be with those you love most. Sending love and hugs

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I went through the same thing 9 years ago. I tried to hide it for the same reasons and it made things worse for me. Hun there is no right or wrong way to face this or your loss. You do as you feel is best for YOU and no one else. But I would encourage you to tell everyone. Good luck hun and I’m so very sorry


In the name of jesus speak as though it were and claim that little ones heart beat. Get a second opinion before final decisions. Doctors make mistakes all the time. And if there is an absolute about this. I am so sorry for your loss. And i pray that god helps you through this time and may all the comfort come your way. God bless. Ps im not religious, but god has shown me he is real over the years and faith has been by my side


So sorry for your loss. There’s no right or wrong way to grieve and everyone handles it differently. I made my baby a box. I put papers from my doctor’s office in it and bought an outfit, blanket and teddy bear in it. I wrote my baby a letter and put in the box. I also planted a rose bush for my baby so I have a place to go to grieve for my baby. Let yourself grieve this loss and lean on your husband during this tough time, my husband was my rock during my miscarriage. Talk to your mom and let her know what happened, my mom was a tremendous source of help for me she was the shoulder I cried on. Hugs to you while you are going through this.

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I’m not a mother, but my best friend is. She was about 8 weeks when she found out it was ectopic. She had to abort and nobody knew about her pregnancy except the father. She felt much better once she was able to say it out loud to her closest friends.
Support is what you need most. Don’t keep it hidden.

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Any and all of your feelings and emotions going through this are totally valid. You feel how you need to feel to slowly recovwr from this loss.


Yes, it’s a hard thing to discuss; I do not know your faith in life- but sometimes prayers work miracles. In my secret place of my heart, I say to my father in heaven–please let the doctors be wrong, but if they be right, please help me endure this. Let your will be done <3 give me peace …in Jesus’ name let it be <3 …now on the other hand, if you have no faith >[?] < there is a mindset that will help you, rely on the technology and take care of your self either way … …maybe ask for a second opinion? [peace be with you either way] <3


I’m so very sorry you are going through this. There is no right or wrong way to feel and no time limit on your grief. You just do whatever you need to do, nothings weird.


So sorry for your loss, and sorry that your mom is far away. I know when I went through this my husband knew I need my mom and drove me to her house to spend the night. You must do what you need to heal. It is a loss no matter if no one knew. You must take care of you. :pensive:

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Before my now 6 year old daughter I was pregnant the year before. But when I went to my 6 week appointment they couldn’t find the heartbeat. I one before they could. When I went to the hospital for the D&c they did a second Check to make sure. My husband at the time was not there with me and when I got home acted like nothing happened. I went through bad depression during that time. Dealing with it by myself at home. My church has amazing women and they all helped me get through it.

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So sorry for your loss. I went through the same thing I was 16 weeks and was told the baby had no heartbeat. I went the next day for the D&C. I was heartbroken. It takes time to heal. For me it was 21 years on May 5th. Even now when October comes around I think about him or her since that would have been when she or he would have been born. I never tell anyone I just think to myself and talk to him I believe it was a boy. Sorry you have to wait so long for the D&C. There’s no right or wrong way to grieve. You might want to share with your family as it helps with the support. I had two more early miscarriages before I had my two beautiful kids.

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Your in shock it’s normal feeling
Had that happen to me at 18 weeks
Cry if you need to cry talk about it helps get past the hurt


It’s absolutely ok to feel how you are feeling… I remember the same feeling all to well like it was yesterday(actually 10 years ago) … You do what you need to do to deal with and recover :heart:

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First off. I’m soooooo sorry about the loss of your child. It’s something no one should ever have to endure. Secondly, it’s okay to cry, feel upset, kinda numb and just doing the usual routine. I myself have list identical twin girls at 7 1/2 months while having a 8 month sold So I fully understand. Sometimes we just need some alone time. Take your time to grieve. Talk to people. Dont be afraid to reach out to people. And take care of yourself and your little 4 year old.

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Sometimes bad things happen for good reasons. We all hope for our babies to be born healthy. This is one way that nature works, to help assure this. Just my opinion.

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I lost 2 babies at 7/8 weeks. My first the doctor recommended a D&C. I opted to do it naturally for the second one. I have mixed feelings about the D&C and am glad I did it naturally the second time. We all cried and consoled each other

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I’m so sorry! I have heard of this before with many other women. I would get a second opinion.

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Ohh my heart hurts for you both and any other couples who have had to go through this!
Same thing happened to us last year and it was hands down the hardest thing I’ve ever been through!
To be honest nothing anyone did or said made it any easier.
Just kept telling myself that it would happen for us when the time was right. And 7 months later we found out we were pregnant again. Our rainbow baby is now 7weeks old.
So stay strong mumma, it will happen :two_hearts::two_hearts:

This happened to me at 10 weeks as well. It is heartbreaking, confusing, maddening!
But, we as moms and wives are supposed to stay strong, right?
It’s ok to fall a part, it’s ok to tell someone who will just let you cry without question.
Having the procedure will help you heal and keep you safe. It can harm you if it stays.
I will pray for you, healing physically, mentally and emotionally :heart:

Connect with Lax Burt she does a healing festival called Samsara Festival . Samsara was her baby that died and they do a healing festival every year around the day of her daughter’s death there is music , dance , yoga , art, massage therapy and many other ways to help you cope with the loss of your baby it lasts for 3 to 4 days and there trying to do something in August if it all goes well

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I just miscarried in January 2020… grief is unpredictable and you need to deal with it as you see fit! I found telling my family and closest friends helped tremendously. It made them sad, yes - but the support and love was immeasurable. Definitely helped me get through it. I also took a weekend trip for myself. Self therapy was helpful as I could cry without reservation. Hoping the best during this trying time.

You don’t have to feel anyway and you can feel all of the ways… I had this happen at 7 weeks, and it being my first pregnancy I was not smart and announced the pregnancy on social media as soon as I got a positive test… I still remember the ultrasound tech telling me they couldn’t find a heartbeat and it felt like all the air got sucked out of the room… short of hard drugs…do anything that makes you feel good and supported. Did your doc specificities recommend for the D&C? I did a medicated at home expulsion… I feel like that actually kind of helped my grieving process a bit… I’m really sorry to hear of your loss. There’s really no wrong way to handle the sorrow…

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This happened to my a couple times. 1st time there was no heartbeat ever. Eventually he came out on his own. Which was somewhat painful. 2nd time was different. I had very heavy bleeding then a period. Dr took blood tests and said my protein levels were dropping signifying a miscarriage. Waited a week to see if it would pass on its own. Finally decided I couldn’t handle knowing I was carrying a deceased baby in my womb. Went back in and Dr decided to do an ultrasound to make sure I hadn’t passed it all already. During my ultrasound they found my baby girl heartbeat and all. I know it’s not typical but you never know. Sorry for your pain.

Talking about it definitely helps. I’m glad you have your husband too speak with. Grief is so hard to navigate. Everything you’re feeling is normal, and being with family may help distract you for the time being. Just remember there is no right or wrong way to handle this.

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So sorry for your loss. Momma, it’s okay to feel confused. You do whatever feels right for you and your family. I lost my son at 7 months. He was born but too tiny to survive. I understand what you are feeling.

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I have been there, a few days after my D&C, we had to do family pictures that we already had scheduled. I had a 2yr old at the time. It wasn’t easy, i was still in a little bit of pain, but i pushed through it. It helped that i had an amazing support system from my family and my SO. We still mourn our baby, but we have our rainbow baby who will be 1 next month and my daughter just turned 5 :two_hearts: stay strong momma amd surround yourself with support!

Everyone handles grief and loss differently. It’s okay to feel how you are feeling. If your feeling up it then go visit your family still. It will help! I miscarried and had a D&C the next day. A week later my husband and I took a trip to the beach. It really helped me to just get away for a lil. :pray:t5::pray:t5:

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There is absolutely no right or wrong way to feel about this. I understand not wanting to make others feel badly, but you really should share it with people. It helps. So sorry for your loss. I too had a miscarriage after having my first.

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I’ve gone through this a couple of times. Let yourself heal in whatever form is best for you. Find someone that is willing to listen or perhaps see a therapist. Be there for your partner too, he may be hurting more but both of you need to be strong for each other. These feelings are normal. As you can see, we’ve been there. Nothing weird.

Call your mom. Hug your husband . Remember he is grieving also. Time helps. Lost my triplets at 12 weeks 24 years ago. I still think of them occasionally but God had a plan. I have an amazing 22 year old daughter now. Yes it is difficult. Yes you are strong enough.

We lost our baby at 24 weeks, I feel your pain! Do not delay in having d&c, in my case I had no choice but to be induced to deliver. The baby almost killed me I was going septic and I didn’t even know it. Don’t delay. I’m so sorry for you but you’ve got to pull through for your little 4 year old. Good luck and prayers and tears in solidarity :cry:

Just went through this in April. I’m so so sorry for your loss!! But, everyone handles things differently. Especially grief and heart break!
If I had a chance to get away for little while after, I’d take it! I hope you find some peace soon and will pray for you and your family!

It isn’t easy when you lose a baby. I agree with these other women. There is no right or wrong way to grieve. Everyone goes through it differently. In time it softens ; but you never forget. You will always remember this baby. I don’t know if you believe in God; but It helped me to know that my baby was in heaven; and some day we will be together again. I’ll keep you in my Prayers. God Bless You! Take Care!

There are many differ at emotions and it’s ok to feel sad, angry…
The saying time heals all wounds was somewhat true for me. Over time the pain subsided but you never forget. A friend bought me a journal, a book by tony Cooke called life after death, and a necklace from vintage pearl to represent both of my losses. Everyone is different but I found talking about it and having the support of family and friends helped me. My husband didn’t have much of a reaction which hurt but I think it’s because it’s not always real to them until the baby is born. I will be praying for you- for emotional and physical healing. :blue_heart::heartpulse:

The same thing happened to me in 2013. Had an ultrasound at 10 weeks, perfect, no issues. Had another one at 12 weeks, no heartbeat. Baby grew no bigger than 10 weeks. Had to have a D&C. We were devastated. I was sad for months, no one really understood.
Im so sorry for you and your family. Prays of hope, strength and healing to you🤍

I had this happen to me also. My baby didn’t have a heartbeat😢 it is so hard to go through but it’s so nice to have someone there for you. You and your husband are experiencing this together and I think it would be great to maybe seek some grief counseling together❤️

So sorry for your families loss, there’s nothing worse than losing a child that you’ll never get to meet and hold, having family that can mourn with you is a great feeling and something everyone should have… Trust the love your family (especially your mother) Zhas for you that they will be able to help you through this time. It’s been 25 years since my miscarriage and now that my two beautiful and healthy children have moved out I find myself wondering and mourning my loss again. Sure wished my mother was still here to help me on my bad days.
God bless you and your family… :heart::heart:

Oh, hun… This happened to me, too. Right at 10 weeks. Nobody except my best friend even knew we were pregnant, so it was hard to grieve. I felt like I had to keep an “everything’s fine” face on while wanting to just cry in a corner. I spent as much time with the friend who knew as I possibly could, and she helped console me when I needed it and made me laugh when I needed it. This will pass, though it will be hard. There is always hope for more children as well, I now have a total of 6!

I think feeling sad is normal with something like that. I’m 12 weeks and I’d be very sad if that happened to me. I sincerely hope that you get through this.

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Sometimes God takes things away because maybe it wasn’t a healthy pregnancy! It’s ok, you didn’t do anything wrong or right, it is just not meant to be
You can mourn this loss, heal, and when you are ready, try again without fear! Lots of love and light to
You and your husband :heart::heart:

Im so sorry that happened to you…it happened to me as well over 25 years ago…i only had a 4 year old daughter at the time…and then i got pregnant…but i stepped off of a curb and fell… and then the same happened to me… and sadly a couple of weeks later a glob like pink fleshy ball came out of me i was so sad it was my baby… i then had a d and c to clean me out …and a couple of months later i conceived my son…my rainbow baby :slight_smile: he was #2 baby and now i have 5 and i am all done lol God Bless and much love

You are SO normal! It’s a loss-you have to allow the grief and feelings. Babies are loved from the first second they are known! Allow yourself to have those feelings!

I would get a second opinion for you to be sure. I had two miscarriages but at the time didn’t know I was pregnant. There is no way to handle this, do what helps you, you will get through it but you never forget. You have your other child to love and if you want, you can try again. Sending you healing thoughts.

My daughter has had 6 miscarriages and been married 7 years. They are now pregnant again but this is week 14 and ultrasound and everythings good. My daughter is scared to even tell people i finally with her husband strongly encouraged her to start telling people. I didnt want satan to put that fear in her and steal her joy. Anyway to say all this is because feelings are never wrong they can cause you to want to do wrong but you feel however your feeling and embrace them and tell the people who love you the most so they can support you. I think you should give them that chance. But no matter what go with your gut… Thats where truth lies. Always trust it. Gods gift to us. If you decide to not tell them make sure its not because of fear. Good luck to you

Allow yourself the time to heal. It is confusing yet numbing at first. Here I am 8 years later and I still cry for my son who prematurely passed from congenital heart failure at 30 weeks. Things happen for reasons we can’t explain. I’m so sorry for your loss. May you give yourself some closure someday.

It’s okay to know how not to feel. It’s ok if you don’t want to tell them, and it’s ok if you do. The more support you have the better for you. I hadn’t planned on telling my family or my mom for that matter about my first miscarriage when it was happening, but all I wanted was my mom, so I called her. That was better even though she couldn’t be there. You’ll get through it momma it’s ok!

I am so very sorry for your loss. I found after my miscarriage that talking to my friends that have had a similar experience helped. It’s ok to cry and be sad. Healing thoughts

I’m so sorry, it’s a horrible feeling but honestly time helps heal, I’m speaking on experience. I had a D&C at 19 weeks. Crying helps and just spending time with those you love!

Oh sweetie, I am so sorry. I heard those words at 23 weeks 2 years ago on july 9th. It his hard!

Please find someone you can talk to, it helps. I know you mentioned having not share this with anyone, but it was what saved me. I just needed to talk. If you dont want to share with those close to you, please feel free to reach out to me, I would love to be a shoulder and an ear for you.

Dont do this alone. :heart::heart:

I went through the same thing. I had a 5 & 6 yr old in the ER I cried and cried. The paramedic was so kind. A few months later I found out I was pregnant again. And I had a beautiful baby girl. Maybe it wasn’t the right time. I pray for your healing. And just know it’s ok to hurt and be sad and cry.

Hang in there girl. I had the same thing happen to me with my first, right around the same week too. It’s so heartbreaking. It’s going to be that lingering hurt in your head for a while. But at least you have your son and can try again. I hope you have a friend or two to talk with. Time heals all wounds. I feel for you. Cry it out, do t be ashamed of that. But don’t let it break you! I’m so sorry for your loss, both you and your husband :sob:

This happened to me twice, I had a D&C the first time and passed it myself the second time. I found the second time easier as far as physical healing. I understand the pain in your heart now.

I too lost a child. She lacked 3 weeks of being born. It is so hard to not only lose 1 child but I lost another at 6 months old in my arms. We may not understand why this happens during pregnancy or even after. But you sweet baby is in heaven. Hold on to your faith in God I promise he will see you through this. Your family loves you and your husband very much don’t keep this from them. Let them love on y’all and help you heal . Crying and talking helps alot.

I’m so sorry. You feel whatever you need to feel. Don’t worry about how other’s expect you to feel. They’ve most likely not gone through this.

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I went through this when my daughter was 4. We had only told her and close family that we were expecting. Telling her was the hardest, but then she understood why I was up and down with my emotions. It took a lot of time, but I was able to move on. Not forget but move forward. Not a day goes by that I don’t think about it. My family was devistated and it’s one of the few times I’ve seen my dad cry. I had another miscarriage 3 years later and we told NO ONE we were expecting. The second one was so much harder because we went through it completely alone, and even our daughter didn’t know. I think it’s important to have your support system in place and have your people to talk to. It does get easier I promise you. Be patient with yourself and your emotions. The trip may do you some good. New surroundings and get your mind off of it. Whatever you decide, it will be exactly what you need. Sending you lots of love. If you need ANYTHING, feel free to message me :purple_heart:

Praying for you. May Holy Spirit encompass you with His presence and envelope you in peace that passes understanding. I’m also praying that a Jesus will supernaturally “start” that heartbreak. Hey, nothing is impossible with God! He has a storehouse of hearts in heaven. I like praying BIG. :heart:

Be strong and pray for healing. I’m so sorry for all you’re going through. I love your page because you make mom’s feel like they’re not going crazy because “it” (motherhood+crazy kids) happens to everyone and no one is perfect. You have blessed us with knowing we’re not alone during these chaoticadventures, and you’re not alone either! Please keep us posted as many of us are praying for you and your family!

This happened to us twice. Honestly it’s something you never really get completely over. Luckily for us (as much as you can say) we had our two miscarriages in between 3 healthy children. Life keeps you busy enough that you think about it less and less. But every now and then something triggers it (movie, article like this, etc…) and the tears come back…

I suggest therapy for both of you, and also independently for mom. It was incredibly helpful for us.

There’s absolutely no wrong way to grieve. Pls find a support group you can join asap. I know far too many over the years that have dealt with their own hell. Prayers :pray: for your peace.

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All your feelings are normal. I am so sorry. You just found out, so allow you and your hubby to grieve. I lost two sweet Angel’s, my first and third baby. It did not hit me as hard as I thought because I knew something was not right the third time. I am the kind of person who needed my hubby and family’s support. Everyone grieves differently so you do what you need to do to get through this. Prayers for strength and healing are being sent your way.

I don’t even know what to say…I don’t know you but am so heartbroken for you and your family…I am in awe of your strength and now is the time to reach out and do not hold this most heartbreaking time on your own shoulders…crying, or screaming or whatever you feel is perfectly ok and necessary for you to heal my dear as a mom I would want to be there (in person or whatever means that looks like) for my daughter…however you know your mom best and that is your decision to make. I’m sending such love and hugs for all of you at this unimaginable time!:heart:

I know how you feel. I have been there. Do what you feel is right. Try to talk to someone you can trust. If you need to pm me. I’m always here to listen.

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I would highly recommend against getting A d&c done. The reason I’m saying this is because my sister was about 10 weeks pregnant and she started bleeding and having severe abdominal pain. When she went to her doctor she was informed that she had lost the baby. The doctor said that there was no heart beat. At that moment my sister was asked to schedule for the procedure and she said no. This is part of nature and if my baby has passed on my body will pass it. Wow after a couple weeks her doctor told her to come back in and guess what there was a heart beat. My niece turned 5 last month! :heart_eyes::heart:
I’m not saying that that is what’s happening in your case but I’m just giving you an alternative to your current situation. I wish I would have known because I myself have had 4 miscarriages. Every single time I listen to the doctors and I had the procedure done. But ever since my sister’s situation I use that situation to spread awareness. :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:

I’m so sorry. The same thing happened to me but I was further along. I wasn’t able to have children (it happened twice and I can’t go through it again) Heal on your terms, the way you need to. It won’t ever leave you. I hope you find peace in your heart and mind…

Same thing happened to me. I found out the day of my husband’s (ex) birthday that it was non viable. It was such a confusing time. The only advice I have is to do what YOU need to do to heal. You do you and your family. As far as.mom goes…i never kept anything from my mom. Moms are there to make us feel better. To help us in good and bad times. I will pray for you and the loss you are dealing with.

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I had a miscarriage, still hurts to think about what could have been. I have a beautiful grown boy now, but the loss still dogs me at times…grief how you need to, let your husband cry…talk about your experience, cause it is real…bless all of you

You are normal. I had this happen with twins. One was found without a heart beat then the other ten days later. There honestly are different ways to grieve. It’s ok to ask what you need to and time does help. I am so sorry for your loss. We went on to have another child and I still remember Dec 22nd as the Birthday they would have had. Sending love and healing your way.

I’ve had two miscarriages. However you feel is valid. I went to work through mine and cried in the bathroom… Life doesn’t stop even when you’re heartbroken and experiencing a loss. Find your people you can lean on, be it your mom or your sister and try to cope as best you can. Just know you’re not alone in this and there’s no wrong way to grieve. :purple_heart:

I know exactly how you feel. I was about 14 weeks. It’s ok to be sad. I was far enough along I had her natural. I asked to hold her. Do i did and told her good bye and to help watch over her sister . I still have her altrasound picture. She would have been 17 this year. I still think about her.

Let yourself grieve. Its a loss and since they usually have you wait awhile for the D&C, it hurts more knowing your baby is still inside of you. I talked to my stomach, picturing the baby listening and knowing i loved him or her. My husband took it very hard and that my oldest daughter was also pregnant and gave birth helped yet hurt. I look at my grandson thinking id have a child his age. Talk to a friend or continue to vent here. Wishing you some peace soon.

I’m so sorry. That really doesn’t help. I know that. I was there 24 years ago. All I can say is this: talk about this child. The loss you feel never leaves. The “what if” never leaves. But:
Talking helps. Sharing the knowledge that this child existed inside you helps. I think talking about it eases the pain.
You will always remember, and memories are best when shared.
You are not alone.

I can’t even imagine what your going through. I’m so sorry. I have a niece that this happened too. She was trying to be strong but I can’t even imagine what she went through alone in her thoughts. I actually had to be with her while she had the baby. She was so beautiful. It was sad. Prayers for your family.

Honey at this point nothing is weird u are a mother who just lost a child grief is u loving the baby like u are still getting to hold her including her in things as get older I lost twin grand sons at 7 months pregnant my daughters babies we speak of them often and it helps grief is natural and dont let anyone tell u it’s time to move on grieve til u r done and remember hold onto each other that lil precious angel still needs mommy and daddy together much love and prayers may God bring u comfort prayers for u all RIP sweet Angel baby