I’ve never had my own child but I’ve been around enough babies in my life as a babysitter, having much younger siblings, etc. so that at 8 I could have told any adult woman that a one year or older NORMAL child will flap their hands! So what if a child has a a physical or cognitive abnormality of some kind! As a retired RN , when I was in training , I did rotations in a facility in my town (where Salk did his Polio vaccine studies) where in it’s more modern incarnation, part of the facility has been a day school for special needs kids and my sis works on the campus of our local residential facility for special needs kids and on the block where I we grew up in the same place, the house behind us was used as a home for some older special needs kids for many years ! In my experience some of these kids had no outward appearance of any problem at all and I can’t imagine if a one yr. old flapped their hands that I would ask the parent if they had autism! I just wouldn’t say anything even if I thought the child did! Just very early this morning I was watching a video online and I was seeing MANY nasty comments about the video (the person’s performance cooking) and the young man looked like he might have had a slight cognitive issue(I didn’t have the sound on as I usually don’t unless it’s music) and I wanted to defend him, but I didn’t because I didn’t want to be rude and assume from just what I saw that he had issues!, so I didn’t! If it was clearly obvious that someone was autistic (or something else) for example , then if I was truly interested because maybe I could relate for some reason or wanted to learn something or offer support , then I definitely would feel free to bring it up to the parent ! But if it’s not clearly obvious , you risk offending the person and these days you don’t know how people will respond! I just talk to all kids of the same age the same and go from there accordingly!
I think people need to stop being offended at the word “Autism” it’s totally ableist and rude of YOU.
I find it rude when people assume anything in general. I mean, so what if he is autistic?! What business is that of a strangers? I can’t think of any reason to walk up to anyone and ask if them/their child is autistic, physically or mentally disabled etc.
My son used to do the same thing and a few people suggested he may be on the spectrum. I didn’t get offended just said thank you and kept an eye for signs. So far at 3 years old we don’t believe he has ASD but it wouldn’t bother us if he did. Some people believe they’re being helpful when all they’re actually doing is creating anxiety. I just try to remember they’re trying to be helpful and appreciate that they care enough to be concerned for my child. Unless it comes out completely rude, which I’ve never encountered, then I would be full on momma bear.
The real question is why do you care what some random person thinks?
Just ignore it? Not like you’re ever gonna see her again
As a parent of special needs kiddos and work with those on the spectrum I can give diff viewpoints. People should never assume. But people with an understanding also ask as it can change a persons actions and or reactions to know if a child is autistic or has needs such as sensory loud noises body language less to no eye contact etc. It could be both:a lady who put her two cents in where it didnt belong or a person who has an understanding on special needs who asked because they can relate. My adhd son was assumed to be autistic. And he may have a touch of the spectrum but his adhd was the focus . assumptions can make you feel how your feeling right now. And I hated assumptions about my son.
Ignore do not bother your head could be true or false either way this is not important for you
Best to assume good intentions even if it felt awkward or intrusive. You could have had a conversation. "What makes you think so? ", “are you involved professionally or personally?” Because an early diagnosis can help if need be. Kids on the spectrum can lead great lives and it helps to know so you can provide proper teaching and support.
People are asssholes. They said something about my brother being autistic because he wasnt playing with older kids he didn’t know… some people are just jealous of you and it comes out in weird ways
You just say in a kind and gentle manner. No hes only one year old. Thats what they do at his age…
If you do not know that lady then yes I do think it is rude
I don’t think a stranger has any right to ask personal questions regarding someone else’s child. Regardless of her intentions (she probably thought she was being helpful) it’s simply none of her business and really not an appropriate thing to do.