What advice would you give a nervous new mom about to give birth?

Mother's Health
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I am about to give birth to my first and am freaking out. What are some tips and advice you could give me? Or anything to calm my nerves?

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I just gave birth 2 weeks ago, and I was super nervous too. What helped me is having a good support system who can help make sure the birthing team does right by you and your baby. Everything was easier than I thought it was going to be, but that doesn’t mean that it couldnt have been worse. Trust your instincts and have someone who you fully can count on in the room with you the whole time.

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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. What advice would you give a nervous new mom about to give birth?

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Do not watch birthing videos!! Also, it’s hard to take advice from others as everyone’s experience is different. Obviously you know it’s going to hurt, child birth isn’t quick and painless. Just remember that it will all be worth it!! A little bit of pain for a life time of happiness! You got this Mama. Don’t think too much about it, just go with the flow and breathe.

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Following because same!

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Get lots of epidural

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Throw a birth plan out the window and do a birth requests. Delayed bath etc. whatever you feel you want.
The only plan you need is to make sure baby and you are healthy.

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Just remember that the pain is temporary and YOU are in control
relax your body from head to toe and breath!! You got this mamma😘

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Listen to your body and be adamant about what you need. Let gravity help. Don’t be ashamed if you need some pain medicine - there is literally a human coming out of your body! Turn your toes inward (if your lying down and giving birth vaginally) - it helps. Be honest about your pain level - they can help you if they know where you’re at - but if you try to “tough it out” or “be strong” they can’t accurately help or give suggestions. Listen to your team - they’ve been doing this a LONG time and have seen plenty of scenarios to be able to help you.

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If you have a long labor ask for an internal fetal monitor. They are the most accurate for baby’s heart rate and how strong your contractions are. They let you move around more freely.

Don’t let anyone pressure you into having an epidural if you don’t want one.

Have a support system with you who will help you relax and stay calm.

Sometimes things don’t go according to plans but you must do what is best for you and your baby.

Follow the doctor’s instructions for after birth

Don’t let anyone pressure you into how you should feed your baby. Feed is best.

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DONT WATCH THE VIDEOS! The birth ones or epidural ones. They made my anxiety worse. Just go with the flow of things. Your body knows what its supposed to do. Enjoy this experience. Eat before you get to the hospital bc once your there no food until after baby is born. Breathing helps during contractions. And remember after its all over you’ll have a beautiful baby to hold.

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If you have access to a birthing coach or a doula, I would definitely recommend getting one.

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take it in stride. If plans change, so be it. the end result is amazing!

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Birth plan out the window.
Honestly though, just breathe and stay in control. The unknown is scary and I was so hyped up by the unknown. Just breathe and relax. If you can stand in the shower do so let gravity be your friend until you are ready to push.

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Everyone’s birth experience is different so this is a tricky question. Don’t have any set plan or expectations and just go with the flow. Every baby/birth is different. I personally love the epidurals, I never felt a single thing and as soon as you can get up and start walking! Buy all the frida postpartum items, the healing foam and cooling liners were my favorite thing ever!

also all hospitals may be different but mine didn’t require me to go #2 before I left. If so, they would’ve been waiting a week or two :rofl: regardless take stool softeners AFTER baby to help!

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Just stay calm and breath deep breaths when your having contractions helps if you relax it’s easier to push xx

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Breathe and push when they tell you to. Relax and stay calm. The scariest part for me was when they told me we could go home. Haha! I was like, what? Now I have to do all this on my own. But it actually comes naturally. Greatest love in the world.

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Go with the flow and trust your body and the medical team around you. They all know what they are doing. Z

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During contractions don’t scream remember to breath. Wash clothes so you can pick what to wear and not just grab what is available. Bring lots of baby clothes they spit up a lot and you’ll want pictures with different outfits don’t bring a book you can’t read during active labor. When you pee after giving birth pour warm water on your lady parts as you pee so it don’t sting. Keep your phone charged so you don’t end up at the hospital with no battery for pictures. Some hospitals don’t allow pictures during labor to avoid law suit if you were to record or photograph a mistake. Don’t get an epidural I couldn’t my baby came to fast but I know people who got life long back pain from it. Buy something to apply diaper cream that moment when you eat chips and taste it even after you wash your hands. It’s called baby bum brush.

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Keeping a conversation with one of my nurses really helped me during contractions. Don’t be ashamed if you need an epidural, it made all the difference with my PTSD while getting examined and putting monitors up there. Plans do change in an instant, was not expecting a c section after no dilation 11 hours later. If you have a cord blood kit, be sure to give it to the doctor asap so they have it ready. Controlled breathing is a great grounding technique. I used poise silhouette diapers for recovery so they would fit under my leggings.

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personally I had 6 babies and never had the epidural just because I’m so scared of needles lol. but my case just remember when baby is out all that pain your feeling goes away, don’t even worry about who sees you naked, I remember my first it was still embarassing but honestly they are all nurses or drs they really only care about your baby and you. try to think of something to focus on during the peak and hard contractions, I would say my kids name on repeat in my head
 as I got more kids I just added lol you may say things you would never even think of!

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Hun your body was designed to give birth. The best thing you can do is take a deep breath and try not to dwell on it. Stressing or freaking out will just wear you down. Find something to keep your self occupied so it’s easier to not think about. Listen to your body. It will tell you when it’s time. I would advise the use of pain meds but it’s your choice. My #1 piece of advice is to get up and start moving around as soon as you can after birth. Don’t get me wrong take it easy but get up and move around. The first thing I did once they moved me out of delivery was get a shower. The warm water on my skin was so soothing to muscles. Last but not least
 If the have a nursery available in your hospital USE IT. Once you go home it’s never ending. You don’t feel rested because the moment that baby even makes a sound your alert and awake. Get the rest while you can. Now I’m not saying leave the baby all day long so don’t get me wrong. With my two I got them from the nursery when the nurse woke me up the next am and didn’t send them back until it was well past dark. I just slept overnight to give my body a chance to rest and heal the best I could before we went home. Best of luck hun

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You are a lot stronger then you think! You really can’t prepare someone for it, and it’s one of the most amazing experiences you’ll ever remember. Just stay calm and know you got this!

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Honestly I was so nervous with my first baby. But somehow when the time came I just knew what to do. It was the scariest most clam moments of my life! You got this momma! Just remember to breathe!

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I made a positive quotes album in my phone and looked at that a lot during labor. You got this! We are the only species that “doubts “ our ability to give birth. It’s natural and you will be amazing—your body will be amazing!! Your body will know exactly what to do and you will have nurses, doctors, helping you through the whole process! :two_hearts:

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Just had a baby last week!
Here was my Facebook post afterwards

This C-Section was/ is 110% better than my last! First things first, no NICU!!!, no emergency!
But secondly; my first spinal felt like he was violently trying to go up my spine with his needle, this time it only felt like a bee sting.
The first time I swelled so large I couldn’t wear PJ pants and got bell’s palsy, this time I just have some swelling in my feet and legs.
The first time it felt like I was going to bust open like a piñata when I first had to walk, this time I was up and walking the night of with almost no pain.
The first time they had me on very heavy drugs that made me fall asleep sitting up, this time I feel like myself.
My only complaint is that I got nauseous and was throwing up all day yesterday, and I was super itchy too, but that has passed and over all it was a super easy and painless experience.

I feel like everyone always shares their bad birth experiences but i just wanted to share my good one because I really went into this dreading it and I ended up being pleasantly surprised!

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I’m going to be a first time grandmother within the next two weeks! I also worked OB/GYN for 15 years! Best tip I ever heard was, BUY A PACKAGE OF DEPENDS! The mesh thing pad the hospital has you put on for bleeding SUCKS. It’s inconvenient and doesn’t absorb well. Depends will feel more comfortable and absorb better! Happy Birthing Mama💜

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Just breathe and stay calm. I was in the same position your in when I was getting ready to have my daughter. I just stayed calm and thought positive thoughts. Also, your delivery nurse is gonna be your best friend.

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Look at all the people in the world
all of their mom’s did it!

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Eat b4 u go to the hospital unless u have a scheduled csection

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Get the epidural. Getting one was one of my biggest fears but I literally didn’t feel a single contraction or pushing my kid out after getting it. Literal lifesaver.

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Just remember to breath through each contraction the gas is good for birthing as well it helped me sleep in between contractions showers are good too and if your at home a nice warm bath to sooth the Braxton Hicks and before you go into hospital the midwives are excellent they will direct you on what is going on I’m not going to lie it’s painful but it’s worth it in the end do not scream try and reserve your engery as you are going to need it and when they say push push as hard as you can good luck I hope it’s a great birth

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Find some birth affirmations on Spotify and listen to them while in labour
 labour in the shower or in water if you can

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What exactly are you freaking out about? Find out what specifically scares you and focus on calming that specific fear

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Honestly
the pain meds through IV help me jjst as much as the epidural
but less pain after with just pain meds and epidural can lead to bad back,hip pain later on on and off. Id rather do it with pain meds than risk the nerve pain of an epidural later on.

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Let go of any picture or expectations of what you think your birth will be like, it will go it’s own way so don’t stress about it, your body knows what to do.
The most important piece of advice I can give is to trust yourself and your gut feelings on everything and speak up if you think you should, you know best.
The moment you see your baby you will forget the pain, it’s such a crazy beautiful thing.
You will do great, enjoy the ride. :purple_heart:

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  1. Take the birthing classes even if you don’t plan to go natural. There is a lot of good information and it will give you an idea of what to expect.
  2. No two births are alike. Make a list of things you want but be flexible. I have 2 kids and had totally different experiences. My sister had 4 and no two of them were alike. So, don’t be freaked out about others stories.
  3. You can do this. It’s what you’re designed for.
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It doesn’t hurt as much as you think it does. You hardly feel the pain and it’s the most beautiful thing a human being can make!

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Advice from the wife of a friend. When you walk or wheel in say: I’m (Name). Give me the drugs; give me all of them; give them to me now.

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Do not be ashamed to ask for some help or company.

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Take it day by day go with your instentc

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Billions of women have done it

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Do not try to make a plan 90% of the time it doesn’t work. Just go with the flow.

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Take the understanding birth class at the hospital with your partner. Honestly knowing all the options and being able to talk to nurses really helped.

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It’s not some beautiful magical experience. You will likely poop and not even know it because nurses whisk the poop away before anyone even knows you pooped. When you push you will feel like you’re going to poop, that means you’re pushing correctly. Deep Breathe and move how you feel comfortable during labor. I’ve managed to birth 7 living humans and I can tell you that it is usually what you make of it. Don’t scream and be loud, you’re wasting energy. Breathe, focus on what your body is doing. Visualize your cervix opening and your baby coming down and out each contraction.

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Learn as much as you can about the birthing process! Be your own advocate and know what you want.

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You’re (most likely) going to panic right before your baby comes, You’re not ready, shes not coming now, in that moment, just take a deep breath and let it go. You’ll never be ready

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Stay calm and remember you were created and made to bring life into the world you got this even the weakest women become warriors at birth it is the biggest scarriest ride of your life that is about to begin congrats and just breathe

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Don’t have any expectations of a birthing plan they usually go right out the window, and if an emergency arises you’ll be even more disappointed in things so just breathe through it all and know its all worth it in the end!

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Bring something with you that makes you feel at home, something that calms you, relax and do your breathing and let the nurse help;)

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Breathe in 5 seconds, hold for 5 seconds, let out for 5 seconds, it will calm you down if you get hyped. You know your body, follow your body when you should push or not. Yes it will hurt but it’s only temporary. Have you gotten shots, they hurt at first but you’re fine after. Have you scraped your knee, yes it hurts but it’s only temporary. If you stray from your birthing plan, it’s fine, just go with the next step. Take a shower, the water pressure will help during contractions. Remember, you can only feel pain or pressure at the same time, not both so let it be pressure and push through it. You got it mama.

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Be nice to your nurses :slightly_smiling_face: If your body starts to shake uncontrollably, that’s completely normal! It’s like you’re shivering but not cold. Nobody told me about the shakes so it freaked me out when it happened to me. It’s just like a burst of adrenaline.

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Honestly only thing that kept me calm during labor was having someone count for me. I would loose track of my breathing ect if not!

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Just stay so calm, listen to your body and go with the flow. It’s not as bad as I thought, hop in the shower, get someone to massage your back, think as the pain gets more intense it’s closer to meeting your baby! You’ll be fine. Good luck :smiling_face:

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Just roll with it. No birth nor woman are the same. You’re a woman so let your body tell you how to do it. Have fun with it too, its an experience you will never forget.

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Well there’s nothing you can do about now but go with the flow. And I highly recommend the epidural

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I know everyone is saying breath but they r right. Just breath throughthe pain, panic, or whatever u feel that u need to. Understand it is all worth it. Everyone always told me when have ur baby NO matter how long journey took to get him/her u dont think of the pain. Its so true. Its all worth it :heart: good luck

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Really just go with the flow.
Your body tells you when it’s time, the nurses will answer any questions you have, you’ll be treated as a queen (hopefully)
Try and sleep tho
 because when pushing time comes it takes EVERY ounce of energy you have.

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Honestly it wasn’t as scary for me once i started going though it

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just breath normally and let your body do the work
dont fight it.

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You and your baby will work your own miracles. The healing from birth is usually not more than a few days. My ob doctor told me let the house and cooking go. It will be done eventually, just enjoy your baby in those few weeks. They do not last long.

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Get the epidural. After that it’ll all be a blur and the next thing you know you’re pushing then a baby is in your arms. It’s wild. And is over before you know it. No worries❀ you got this!

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Its going to sound cliche, but Breathe. Breathing helps so much. Have an bag ready for yourself and your baby with all the nessesities (google what is needed) and listen to your doctor and nurses, they are there to help you.

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Get the always disposable diapers

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  1. Don’t scream! instead while your pushing do deep grunts

  2. Relax ( as best you can) Don’t clench your hands shut or squeeze! Try having your palms open.

3.Trust your body and trust yourself.

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Get the epidural! Childbirth is no joke lol

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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. What advice would you give a nervous new mom about to give birth?

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My advice just listen too your body,

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It’s all worth it when that little bundle of joy is placed in your arms :heartpulse:

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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. What advice would you give a nervous new mom about to give birth?

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So with my first, I was terrified. I would be lying if I said its easy, but its definetly worth it. The pain of the contractions will go when the baby comes. That emotional rush when they hand that baby to you will be overwhelming and so beautiful all at the same time. Trust in your body, and your dr. Everything will be perfect once you get to hold your baby. Then prepare to not sleep for a few years. Lol
All kidding aside. You’ll be okay mama. Say a prayer during labor, if that’s your thing. Whatever you believe in, let it drive you.

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Just breathe mama, I was about to throw up during my c section but hearing that baby really does change everything.

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I listened to ocean waves over my headphones and it helped me focus on something other than the actual labor.

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You’ll do great! Trust me it’s worth it! If the pain gets too bad ask for medication, it’s ok to ask for help, if you have to have a c-section then just remember it only takes a few minutes! You got this! It’s worth it! Remember the goal here! You get to meet you precious little baby!

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Okay so you’re gonna be scared up until the moment it happens. And then you’re gonna be so excited the pain isn’t there anymore and you have your baby :heart::heart: I had my sister ask me to ask the doctor if I was gonna die while delivering because I’m so tiny. I had strange contractions and my water broke at 10:30 at night and i was 37 weeks and 1 day. so they induced me a bit. Induction medicine actually made it hurt so bad so I asked for the epidural. My doctor doing the epidural was really mean and wasn’t paying attention to my contractions. My mom yelled and told her to wait til one stopped

I ended up needing another dose of the epidural so they pumped it in. I passed out. Woke up around 6:50 am and he was out by 7:05am

Don’t think too much about and if you do just know it does happen fast.

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When contractions start getting bad jump in the shower and let the warm water run on your stomach. I spent hours in there. It helped so much .

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Just breathe and love them. All you need to know. Everything else will come naturally, promise! Even at 19, 25, and completely alone both times I decided from day one that I was going to raise my kids by THEM and what they tell me. No one else. My 4 month old son wanted food and even some table foods. I gave it to him, and now he eats things I wont touch! I didn’t baby proof a damn thing either time, and now my kids are respectful, don’t touch anything unless they ask first, and know that the world does not conform to them. It really is just common sense, what do you want to create, and love at the end of the day.

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I’m in the same boat. Pregnant with my first. Today is his due date but he seems too comfortable to try to come out. I go back next week and they’ll probably have to schedule induction for me.

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Don’t plan. I’m an overthinker and planner. My entire birth plan, including what I packed went out the window. Including postpartum. Nothing I expected to happen, happened. I wanted a natural birth. Little one and my body had different ideas. What I got was a footling breech baby, a failed ECV, and a scheduled C-section a week before I was due.

Little ones, your body, and life does what it wants no matter how much planning. Mind distractions are key- my OB played my favorite genre of music by my ear, my husband kept constant eye contact and talking to me about our favorite memories, and the whole 13+ people in the room were walking me through what was happening and checking in with me (I like to be told what’s happening to help calm myself. I hate not knowing and being surprised).

The first cry is everything. :smiling_face_with_three_hearts: Your entire being changes- life changes. It’s honestly worth every moment. There is NO other feeling than seeing your baby.

You got this mama! :heart:

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Breathing is so important! My first son I went in blind, screamed out the pain. My second I approached differently and tried to focus on my breathing over anything else. All labors are different but I swear it helped me out tremendously!!

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Breathe. Don’t fight the pain, just blow through it. When your sweet baby is born all the pain just goes away.

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I was sooo nervous when I went in to be induced they made me take an anxiety med. :grimacing::grimacing: everything will be okay! It’s much easier than you’ll ever expect in the moment it’ll feel like you can’t doit at some points but you can!

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The best advice I can give is do everything on your hands and knees like scrubbing floors, l had the cleanest floors in town. This puts the baby in position for birth. Do not fight the labor pain relax your body and work with them by breathing with the pain. I had 5 babies and my longest labor was 45 minutes. Don’t listen to all these horror stories. Good luck.

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Forget about it honestly. The more you think about it the worse your anxiety will be and it’s gonna be ok. Trust your doctors, ask questions, don’t Google too much, just pack your stuff and get your mind off of it and trust your body as well. Think about the baby and holding them and how amazing that will be. Don’t ask for horror stories because everyone has them. I had my first natural and it was nowhere near as bad as my mom said and my second was just comfortable in there so I got the epidural and he came right on after being induced and the third came on her own and I got the epidural and it was fine. You’re gonna do great, meditate and breathe. Congrats! :heart:

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It doesn’t last forever and you get such an incredibly amazing gift at the end. Also as soon as baby comes the pain is nearly nonexistent so push with all you might when it’s time. With my second I whimped out on too good contractions and that was hell! Hurt worse than not pushing. Oh and push like your pushing out the biggest poop ever
seriously that’s what it feels like. :smile: and those are the muscle you want to be using. Good luck mama!

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Contractions for me were the worst part of delivery. Once I had my epidural it was a huge relief and I had an easy delivery. Just BREATH and think positive thoughts! When you see your beautiful baby it will all be worth it! You will do great mama! :heart:

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Take ALL the drugs they offer you :raised_hands::raised_hands: there’s no point to be needlessly in pain :purple_heart:

Get to the hospital AS SOON as you feel your first contraction, not everyone has long deliveries, and bring things that will make you comfortable for a couple days afterward :purple_heart::purple_heart:

Good luck momma :muscle::muscle:

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Dont stress you stressing can make it harder for your body to relax it caused me to have epidural the first time I gave birth that was 2 days of me laboring also I didn’t feel any pain so just because people usually feel pain doesnt mean you will I think that’s why I was stressing so much you got this trust me and also ive had 3 kids and I never ripped or tore so dont stress about that either everyone is different

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I had 3 traumatic labors so I’m no help😂
I did survive. Now I have my tubes removed so no more of that shit. Just breath and whatever happens, happens. Oh and whatever you do try not to induce labor. Baby will come when they are ready.

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90

Try and remember that whatever your “plan” is, is most likely not going to happen. I don’t say that to be mean or scare you, but labor is extremely unpredictable! I went in for my blood pressure to be checked at 37w and was induced on the spot, no hospital bag packed or prepared materials :joy: I was in labor for 43 hours
 I also was not for/ against an epidural
 I got one from a med student and it did not take so I felt everything lol but no matter what I would do everything again to have my son!!! He is my entire world. Please just remember that is is painful but it goes by quickly and then you have the love of your life in your hands​:heart:

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91

Ik not gonna sugar coat it. I literally have nothing good to say about giving birth. 1 week post partum and it was the worst thing I’ve ever been through but I didn’t have a typical birth. I was induced abs then had to have an emergency c section. BUT!! My baby boy is the best thing that’s ever happened to me. As scary as it is they will surround you with professionals who are doing everything they can to make sure you are safe and healthy and your baby is safe and healthy. It’s going to be scary and it’s going to be hard but it is sooooo going to be worth it when you hold that baby!

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It’s going to hurt like hell :100: but it’s going to be :100: worth it. It’s the closest I’ve felt to death but the best moment of living too. Get lots of sleep and self care while you can before you put your body and mind to work.

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Same advise I give everyone who is pregnant. Get the epidural and push like you are pooping. Pushing like you are peeing doesnt do anything. Push like you have to take a :poop: and if you :poop:while in labor no big deal. I’m pretty sure I did shit with my son but midwife just wiped and tucked. My son was in the large side tho 8# 8oz and I was induced a week early. Everyone’s experience is different. I was very lucky and had 2 easy deliveries. Walked to my post partum room after delivery and was up showering less than 12 hours after delivery. What they dont talk nearly enough about are the post part hormones. With my son I cried such and for absolutely no reason after I had him. It wasnt nearly as bad after I had my daughter. I cried a couple of times. Once when my son pinged a little ball pit ball off of my daughter’s head and I completely lost shit on him because had it been a heavier toy he could have really hurt her. Then when i was talking to him about it i started crying like a baby :woman_facepalming:t2: hormones, such fun. Anyway just push like you are pooping :joy:

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Deep breaths. Your body knows what it needs to do and you’ll have a care team around you. And you’ll receive the freaking coolest gift EVER for your hard work afterwards. It’s really a cool experience. And I was terrified of it at one time. Huge soon to be new mama! :heartpulse:

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95

Being nervous is completely normal. Having time to think about it does that to usđŸ„° I’m going to have my 5th in a couple months and I am nervous too lol but I can say once you are in labor your body does know what to do and you won’t have time to think about all the possibilities because you’ll be pretty busy😊 Hope everything goes as smoothly as possible!

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When my water broke I was crying i wasn’t ready to be a mom
I was terrified, but when the moment actually comes you’re instincts kick in and the nerves calm
 its all a learning experience
 and just know everything will be ok.

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If you get the epidural it isn’t bad AT ALL. you feel like you’re trying to poop​:rofl: be ready to cry your eyes out when you hear that cry. I was so
idk how to explain it. Just amazed and happy and tired :sweat_smile:

98

It’s terrifying up until it isn’t, for me at least. I was so nervous but once things started happening and I started progressing, all the fear kind of went away because i had more things to think about, like getting through the next contraction.
Above all, remember that our bodies are literally MADE for this. Your body does all the work for you without you even having to think about it really. Remember that women have been giving birth, some unassisted, since the beginning of time. Remember that even animals, as dumb as some of them are, give birth.
Your body is made for this and it will practically do all the work for you. Instincts kick in and you’ll just do what feels right at that moment.
You got this mama!

99

When you go into labor. You won’t even remember you had nerves. Relax. Breath and don’t kill husband lol. It all worth it. You’ll do great.

100

All 4 of my pregnancies were amazing. I loved giving birth- as crazy as that sounds. Just breathe
 it’s all worth it !