My husband works part time at night, cleans and cooks and picks up our daughter from school everyday. I’m the breadwinner, but he does all of the really hard work. Tell your family to mind their own business, as long as what you have going on works for you it doesn’t matter what they think.
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Nowadays it will cost you more to put the kids in daycare than he would make at a job does he take care of all the children
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He works to cover his bills on weekends and help with the babies necessities 
so he’s a stay at home dad the remainder of the time what’s the problem with that but it’s okay for a woman to be a stay at home mom:thinking:
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As long as he’s not putting a financial burden on you I’d say it great! It’s nice to have parent in home with the kids all week.
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As long as YOU ARE HAPPY WITH HIM TAKING CARE OF THE BABY & KIDS I WOULD SHUT YOUR FAMILIES COMMENTS DOWN. STAY AT HOME DADS ARE IMPORTANT TOO. PLUS HES PAYING HIS BILLS AND BUYING BABY THINGS SO THEY HAVE NO REASON TO JUDGE YA’LL. 
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Absolutely no different than being a stay at home mom. As long as he’s pulling the weight in other areas and you are happy. It’s your business not anyone else’s. God bless
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It’s 2022. Lots of SAHD these days. If you’re both happy & this works for you & your family, ignore the others. If he treats you right & does a good job at taking care of you & your children, I don’t see any issues.
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If he is staying home and doing childcare while you work along with shouldering some of the cooking and cleaning sounds like a fair trade off.
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Turn the tables. Men have to do it all the time…
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If it works for you and your family then its great. A dad can stay at home just like a mom can stay at home.
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If it was a mother and you were the father would you ask the same question. If the answer is yes then your feelings are valid. If no then you need to not let your families sexist comments get to you
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If he does great around the house and you don’t feel like the whole house is financially drianed then let it be. It’s not your families business if he can’t contribute financially right now. If you both have jobs you are happy at leave things alone. People will always say something that doesn’t involve them.
If the family starts opening their mouth thank them for volunteering to pay for child care so he can go to work full time.
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I think it’s great. If you know you are in a profession that makes more, why saddle yourself to daycare bills if he goes to work full time?
My old bosses husband was a stay at home dad. He aas for 4 yes till their daughter went to vpk and now he works fulk time too. It was a good thing for them and their daughter
You are lucky to have such a guy and if the two of you are happy that is all that matters.
If he takes care of the kids while you work and you’re not paying for child care. And you are not struggling financially. What’s the problem.
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There are some women dealing with men who don’t help with the kids, house, or anything. Trust me you would find that so much worse even if he were to have a full time job.
He’s a stay at home dad and still has a job and makes sure his bills are paid and helps with baby stuff. I see nothing wrong with this.
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I delt with all kinds of crud from my family when I worked and my husband stayed home (for just a few months) … little did they know he was devastated that it was that way and hurt him he didn’t want it to be that way but it had to be for a little bit due to medical… even with all the circumstances my family who is old fashioned always had something to say … when behind closed doors if my husband had a choice I would of never ever worked … don’t let it get to you … if it works for you then that is all that matters … stand up to them and shut it down quick or it will start to hurt your relationship whether you intend on it or not❤️ if something works for you who cares what everyone else thinks …
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First off if family is not feeding clothing or housing you not their business and kindly ask them to stay out, second he is helping you with everything else so he is technically a stay home dad. Nothing wrong with that. On top of that he is working enough once your home to take care of his bills so they are not on your plate. Sounds perfect to me.
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Sooooo you’re telling me he’s a stay at home dad but he also contributes with an income? Just because his income doesn’t contribute directly to you but he still pays his bills and pays for baby AND you love each other and the kids are happy….I’m confused with what the problem is here…tell your family and anyone else who wants to dig into your life to get out of 1955 and join us here in 2022.
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Where do I sign up? 
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Me personally I think it is ok because it is work takeing care of kids and the house
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If it works for your family dynamics that’s all that should matter. Daycare is expensive and being a stay at home parent is hard. I spend almost $1,000 a month just on daycare alone and that’s not including any outside babysitting for date nights or to pay his parents if my little can’t go to daycare but I have to go into the office. So I would say if it works for you then screw them
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If he’s doing all the duties of a stay at home parent and not being lazy I say that’s awesome and good for you both for reversing the tables. He sounds like a good man to me!
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What’s the difference if it’s the Man or Woman being a stay at home parent? 
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If he’s a stay at home dad he is contributing
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Higher a nanny, get rid of him
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There is nothing wrong with it if you don’t have a problem with it. Right now it works because you have a baby that needs 24/7 care, and cheaper than daycare. When the baby starts school if he doesn’t get job that helps him contribute to the household, that when I’d have a problem.
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Why is everything always about money? If you’re comfortable & managing I don’t see a problem
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If it were the opposite and you were in his position no one would care. If you are both happy with the arrangement then let him be a stay at home dad and help you in other ways.
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I find it old fashion for your family to say that he should have a full time job because he is the man. Granted most men don’t stay home these days BUT i don’t find it any different if it were you that stayed home and he worked full time. He seems to be doing everything you would be doing if it were you at home.
He’s home raising your child! That is a full time job in itself! Kudos to him for stepping up! In my opinion it doesn’t make him less of a man for doing what he’s doing and it works for the two of you.
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Well women been doing it for years. And nobody has nothing negative to say about it because it’s a woman that’s her role I’m back in the sixties and seventies we started burning our bras for equal rights so if we going to get we equal rights let it be equal rights all the way across the board js if you love him and he’s doing his part in the home cooking clean and taking care of your kids I wouldn’t give a damn what nobody had to say
Does it work for you all? Childcare is expensive so if he is home and helps in that sense then shoot I would take it!!! It is you all’s life, not everyone else’s
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I say it is your business and it doesn’t sound like he is lazy at all. Why do they care? Tell them to butt out.
Every family dynamic is different and unless they are paying your bills, should have no say so. It’s like if you only worked on the weekends and didn’t pay bills. I say you should not let anyones opinions on your relationship get in your head.
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Men can be stay at home dad’s. My husband has been at some points. The only issue I see is your family thinking they have a say and putting him down
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A homemaker is a 24/7 job. I did it until my last child entered school and then got a day job. What a relief. Working was easier than being a homemaker. God Bless Him.
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If y’all are comfortable and he does in fact take a good load off of you (being a stay at home parent when done right is tons of work) then I’d try to get them out of your head.
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My late husband was a SAHD for about 8 months(2003-2004) until he got sick (passed away from brain cancer 4 months later). He was great at keeping up the house and making sure the kids were taken care of…I was great at working. Heck with what anyone thinks…do what is best for your family.
Stop letting your family in all of your business. Your bills and finances is no one’s business but yalls. If he is working and taking care of his baby and whatever bills he has, instead of throwing it all on you then he is contributing. Be thankful you have someone who is taking care of his kid. Plus if he gets a a full time job, you get to add childcare to that list of bills. Choose your battles. Sounds to me like he is pulling his weight.
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A stay at home dad is just as valid as a stay at home mom.
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Your choice. Can you live this way permanently with him or will it get old. Paying his own way but not financially helping otherwise sounds more like a stay at home with mom teenager to me. In my opinion if he stays he needs to man up and be financially responcible like a man with a family.
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If he’s a stay at home dad, that’s a full time job in itself. And it’s a major contribution to the household. Childcare cost is also eliminated. Then, he’s working working weekend too? So he essentially gets no “off” days. I’m a SAHM and it is a LOT of work. I can’t even imagine having a paying job to go on weekends too.
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If he is a stay at home parent then he is contributing! If you are okay with it that’s all that matters, as long as he is taking care of the baby & the home and not just sitting around doing nothing for 5 days out of the week then why should there be any issue with it? I know a couple of stay at home dad’s myself and they are some of the most wonderful, responsible & compassionate men I know! Your job does not define you
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The money he is saving you both on childcare and housekeeper is significant. Plus if he is helping with the cooking, household management, etc., he is contributing more than if he had a full time job. I say kudos to you both for making this work and an extra kudos to him for working on the weekend after doing everything he does all week. That’s more than most expect from new moms. Good job on figuring out life as a newly formed family!!! You’re both doing great!
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It is your life, be happy
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It’d be different if he didn’t help at all or wasn’t involved at all. Are you saving on child care? If so, I would consider that a contribution. It’s ultimately up to you, as time changes maybe he will see the need to work full time. Maybe he doesn’t know it’s an issue for you? Do you have a problem with it or does your family? Do you feel taken advantage of?
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Omg keep him. Love him. Appreciate him! If you don’t need his help financially it doesn’t matter
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He works on the weekends to cover his expenses. When he’s home you said he helps with the household chores cooking cleaning and takes care of the kids. I see nothing wrong with it. It would be different if he didn’t do anything all day while he was home. And your family needs to stay tf out of it. Don’t let them get to you.
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Your kids and BD are your family. Every one else is just an outsider with opinions they can keep to themselves.
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Only thing you should be asking yourself is why let your family know your business like that and get in your head?! Sounds like you have a great guy in many ways!! They are judging him says more about them than they can say about your BD!! I’d put them in their place and live your life girl! 
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Sounds like he’s a sahd… if you are happy with that then what do they care? But be sure sahp are doing unpaid labor and allowing you to build your career.
To start/ get married so all you friends will see that he not just a room mate / and if it works for you two it really no one problem
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I don’t care if the other person works. As long as they are financially independent and fiscally responsible it isn’t my business or concern how they make it work.
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Oh my goodness. Imagine if we were talking about a role reversal? Nobody would judge if a mom was only working weekends and mostly a stay at home mom.
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Okay well if works full time do you really want some stranger taking care of your baby!? You’re going to have to pay for daycare either way whether your family or stranger watches baby so that’s saving you ALOT of money! I think he is doing his part you shouldn’t let your family get to you because then you’re just going to discourage him 
Is he doing to make more money than it would cost for childcare…if not then I wouldn’t stress it. It sounds like he’s parenting the kids while you work so that’s a legitimate job to me.
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Wow he sounds amazing, compared to ALL the boyfriends I have had throughout my life, the husbands/boyfriends I read about and know. You don’t want to downgrade and get rid of a great guy bc of family dtama and talk. Sounds like to me he is pulling more than his share!! Childcare us so darn expensive, I pay $1,000 only bc their dad is court ordered to pay tge other half. He is working double full time sounds like to me.
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Just because the older generation believes that the man should be out working his ass off all day and night and hand his wife over a paycheck, it doesn’t make it the RIGHT way to live. We’re in 2022 now, things have changed since 1950 where it could be frowned upon. Like you just said, you’ve been doing it all alone prior to him and you were fine. So, just because he’s living with you now, that’s not an automatic green light for your family to say, Great! Now you can stay home and be financially dependent on a man! If half us women/mothers actually got emotional support from our men of WANTING to participate in baby bonding, cooking and cleaning, we’d all be in paradise. Also, he works weekends and only makes enough to pay “his bills”. I’m sorry but, if you’re now a family, living together, creating a life together, etc … you should now be saying OUR bills. A full time parent is still a full time job. While us women would be the first ones to feel undermined because it’s normally the narcissistic husband saying “you don’t do shit to help us because you’re not out working” … just think of the costs of daycare/babysitters nowadays with extra health and safety risks … so while he may not actually be handing money over to you, he’s saving you A LOT!
He works weekends he still works, taking care of babies is a full time job alone, let alone cleaning and cooking . That is a job. Being a good dad is a huge plus. He pays his bills then sure. But if he works full time, and helps you pay stuff then your gonna probably need a sitter right? That’s a lot of money so his money would go to baby sitters yes? Always take that into consideration… if you get along don’t blow it cuz people are judgy and jelly
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l get paid over $125 per hour working from home. l never thought I’d be able to do it but my buddy makes over $25974 a month doing this and she convinced me to try. The possibility with this is endless.
Details HERE… https://onlinehomejobbiz20.neocities.org/
Really it not their business. Staying home and caring for kids and the home is a whole job in itself and people done realize that. I’d rather go to work any day of the week than fully stay home and take care of the kids, cook and clean. Its alot of work. It’s not like he is being lazy and just sitting home on his ass playing video games and not helping with anything. For what daycare costs it is probably worth it and him working weekends. If you guys aren’t struggling financially then really isn’t an issue. If you are, maybe he could look into some part time evening work.
Something tells me that if you guys both worked full time and paid daycare, and then came up short on money, your family wouldn’t blink an eye. Yet, y’all have a system that works beautifully, and that isn’t good with them. Next time they want to bash him, ask them which one of your bills they want to pay. When they give you a quizzical look, remind them that if they aren’t paying your bills, to mind their own damn business
Look at it this way, he is working at home. Why is it ok for a woman to stay home and be a stay at home mom but not the same for a dad? He can do the housecleaning, laundry, grocery shopping, amd baby care while you work. That take a stress off you because otherwise you would have to do all that, plus care for a new baby, plus your other children, AND work. Stop letting your family voice their opinions about someone you care about. They’re not paying your bills either so they get no say
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If you’re happy who cares. Women can be stay at home moms why not dads?
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Well… Its like that when moms are chosen to be a full time SAHM. Dads can do the same thing. If its ok with the both of you and he helps out so much and is a great dad. Whats the problem?
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There is no difference in him and a stay-at-home mom. He’s caring for the children during the week and working on the weekend to make extra money to cover his liabilities. If he were sitting around and not helping or neglecting the kids, that would be different, but he is contributing. He’s saving you a lot in childcare. He should probably contribute to keeping the house in order, too, not just while you heal, but while he’s home.
If you need his help financially, that is another topic.
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If he is a stay at home dad and has a weekend job that is awesome. In my eyes better and more work than having a full time m-f job!
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How’s it any different if he was the one working and you being the one staying home. Why does it always have to be the women that have to be the one’s staying home.
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If they lack ambition, education and the drive to earn an abundance of Money, that will likely Never Change.
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Wow Why U don’t need him …
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If you are ok and happy with this arrangement, that’s all that matters. I just hope that someday you don’t get a resentment towards him.
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I’m fine with it, do you know how much daycare is???
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Keep him cause I dont find alot of men that will do any of that in the end u save money also on day care cost and lots of Dr visits from baby being sick all the time if they were in Daycare… if your happy and all the bills are paid then that’s all that matters…
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So… It sounds like he is a stay at home dad which is a job in itself.
I wouldn’t let anyone else’s comments affect you… if it works for y’all, that’s all that matters. 
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Seriously look up how expensive daycare is. If he’s a stay at home dad and does all that he’s definitely helping you financially.
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I wouldnt let outside opinions influence the dynamic of your household. Unless it was abuse related and you were possibly being blind to it. But your family dynamics are no one’s business and id tell my family that they were being disrespectful if they continue to make comments on it after you tell them that thats just how your household works. If its not really an issue for you. If you dont like how your house is ran, then you should communicate with your partner. Not outsiders.
What are YOUR thoughts on how things are? If you are good with him don’t let others interfere!
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Stay at home dad is no different than a stay at home mom.
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It would be different if he wasn’t watching the kids so you can work, child care is expensive
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Well he’s at least working and helping the baby. If you can afford to keep that arrangement do so. Child care is expensive, especially for a baby. There is nothing wrong with being a stay at home parent regardless if male or female.
Didn’t you say you guys take turns buying the necessities for baby isn’t that part of helping out financially? If you are not happy tell him be honest
would they say the same if it were you? I could see if he werent helping with the kid at all but lets not dismiss being a full time parent is a job. A study actually showed parenting is like working 2 .5 jobs in itself. Maybe you guys can work on a percentage he can contribute to the household but if you were able to manage the household bills before youll be fine now. You have someone that is there as built in childcare as many fathers nowadays are not present ( by circumstances or choice) in their childs lives. Is your family going to step up and take over that role for a child they didnt create if you let him go? It didnt seem to be an issue until they said something. Do what works for your household, not their ideals
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If he is doing all you say as a stay at home dad…he is helping financially! Look at the day care you save! Cooking and cleaning also has its merit. If you can accept this…speak up for him. It’s your life and you make the decisions! There are many stay at home dads!
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Well does he take care of the kids while you work.
The hypocrisy is real. If a man tries to cut off a woman who doesn’t work…. Or wait y’all not ready to talk about this.
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Think what it would cost for day care
Lol when the roles get reversed.
Come on where are you at “ stay at home mom is a full time job”
“Taking care of a baby is a full time job” etc….
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From what you said, he’s working pretty hard. Housekeeping, child care, cooking, laundry, etc, these things are expensive to pay to have done. And you don’t have to worry about a stranger mistreating your child. He does have a job on weekends and buys things for the baby, which is expensive, and pays his own expenses… I’d say he’s doing pretty well. I would ask your family if they want to donate free child care and help out around the house so he can work full time. I can pretty much guarantee you would get the thousand mile stare. They need to hush and let the two of you do what’s best for your family.
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The way I see it, if he’s helping and watching the baby while you work that is saving a ton on child care expenses. A lot of people have the stigma that men aren’t worth crap if they don’t have a full time job and aren’t providing but a stay at home dad is no different than a stay at home mom. Sure it’ll add some stress sometimes but if it works for you and you’re both okay with the situation, keep it as it is. People will always talk, even if he had a full time job people might judge what that job is.
It’s already been commented but what difference does it make that day stays home instead of mom ?
If it works for you and your family, let the opinions of others go in one ear and out the next. 
If he watches the baby and does housekeeping and cooking, then it’s ok, if you both agree
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Just like a stay at home mom, but a man. Your family can mind their business
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Would you be even questioning this if the roles were reversed. Childcare, taking care of the home and not adding to your bills because he pays them from his part time job is helping tremendously. I think you need to appreciate him.
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It is no one else’s business how you split chores/finances in your own home as long as it works for you guys. As long as kids are taken care of, bills pad, chores done…Good for you!
First, he’s helping tremendously with finances. You’ve raised children before, so you should know what you’re saving on daycare prices alone. Secondly, would anyone have any issue if roles were reversed and you were the stay-at-home mom? If this is working for YOUR household, that’s what matters and have his back when it comes to your family.
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It sounds like he works full time to me.
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If he staying home taking care of the baby while you’re working a full-time job and works on the weekend I’d say he’s a full-time job plus a part-time job so your family needs to understand that not always is the Mother’s Day at her mom and Daycare‘s expensive. As long as you two are OK with the situation and it works for your family then that’s good but your extended family is going to have to just come to terms with it’s not their life it’s yours. 
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He is a keeper. He works on the weekends and brings in enough money and then he is watching the baby while you work. I call that a great relationship. The cost of child care alone is expensive and if y’all make this work then that is great and you should not listen to people that are not in your little family. People have to do what is best and it sounds like y’all are awesome
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