Co-parenting question: what do you do when the other parent refuses to contribute financially (no cs ordered) and only has his children for one 24hr period a week. He doesn’t ask for them ever. His mother sees my oldest more than he does. And when he is asked to help financially, he is always broke, yet just bought a $3,000 ring for his new GF/fiancé/whatever who he has been dating for two months (keep in mind my engagement/wedding ring I had to wait two years for, only cost $300 and his mother paid for it… 
). I’m so tired of pretending to be okay with this… what do I do???
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I think it’s time to get it court ordered
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File for child support?
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Um go to court and get a child support order!!! 
that is a common sense question there…
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Get it court ordered, that money should go to his children before it goes into a ring . Get it court ordered so that he is forced to pay it . Put your foot down, you didnt make those kids on your own .
Get a Child Support Order. Theyll take it from his check.
Go to court. That should’ve been done already.
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Do you! Don’t worry about him and his share. Focus your energy in a different direction. You can’t fix him nor his relationship with his kids. All you can fix is what you have control over.
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What do you do? Go get court ordered child support.
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Document. Document. Document. Court.
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Go to court and do a child support order asap
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Go to court, get child support. If he wants visitation, then they can discuss it at his expense.
Court ordered… If he mediated that would be smarter… If he has to go and argue with the judge about how broke he is…he will not win… Course I’m still waiting 13 yrs later for the card to even come in the mail. Attorney General without a good lawyer really can be a waste of time in the longrun. If he don’t want to pay. Then he can work around the system
Get a court order and if he has a steady job make sure you get a garnishment on his wages… I mean really if he’s not paying child support and doesn’t see this coming then he’s an idiot … good luck to you …
I had state benefits, insurance, food stamps etc when the child was lil they took it from him through the state court order. He owes over 25k they just started taking from his retirement benefit this past year lol he’ll pay a little on it each month until he dies probably.
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It’s called court ordered support and back support.
Depending what State you’re in you can go to an attorney, or you can go to Child Support Enforcement office and open a case.
Get a court order but really…don’t depend on him. Do whatever you can to make yourself and your child financially, physically and emotionally independent.
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Sounds normal men’s midlife crisis lol Conract the Chimd support Agency or your Taxation people and get his wages Directly deducted from his wage that’s how we Do it in Australia
Go to the court and file for child support, which you can do with out a lawyer. Support and visitation are two separate courts.
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Go to court! Do not be nice about it. I tried being nice and now its biting me in the ass.
She probably bought it, dont be so sure of what you see. It might not be what you think
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You can get it court ordered. Doesn’t mean he’ll pay though…he can go to jail for not paying I believe but he cant pay it if he’s in jail either. In some places they can take it out of his paycheck if he has a job where hes not paid “under the table”.
Take his butt to court! Why is there no CS order?!?
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Go to child support services and file a report and claim…i got back support owed and a cost of living increase
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Get a court order for child support and do it now.
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You have to take AM the corner put child support orders out I know it’s the only way
Go to court get a child support order AND an income withholding order to ensure he pays it!
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Do not be nice…if you let him get away with it why would he stop…?
Go to the attorney general’s office
It’s sad but it’s showing that your a strong woman and can also be a good strong Mother as well. Take him to court and get it ordered for child support or just keep doing what your doing
All you can do is file for child support.
Can’t once anyone do anything otherwise.
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Take him back to court & file for child support
I don’t understand how it wasn’t ordered
I know ppl who had to pay child support while they were separated, & not even filed for divorce
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Take him to court. Not difficult to figure out. He needs to contribute financially to the raising of his child. 
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Sounds like he’s a narcissist and you are better off without him
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He doesn’t want to co-parent the nice way take him to child support court and make him do it the right way - he’s taking advantage of the fact you haven’t done that and he will continue to flaunt it in your face knowing right at the moment you can’t do or say a word about it - take the reins back and show him how it’s done - you and your children deserve it and if he gets mad over tough love on him. As another person said child support and visitation courts are two separate courts that do not intertwine with one another. Good luck on whatever decision you make.
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Been there and done this!! File for child support ! You just have to give the CSA some info and they take it from there. It took me about two months to get it. They also calculated back payments. He can’t bankrupt it and it doesn’t go away until he is totally paid up even after the child turns 18 he can be forced to pay until there is $0 owed to you.
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Get court ordered child support…
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You go to child support office and have him garnished.
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Definitely same situation. Dont deal with him, so i dont care…but cs sounds like a plan.
File for child support and have it garnished from his paycheck, this way u r guaranteed to get your money…
I would get a court order. That way if he doesnt pay, they garnish his wages.
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Simple. Take him for child support.
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You don’t have a child support order so he isn’t going to pay. You can tell him how you feel about it all you want you need to go to court and get a child support order. And then put im in jail if he doesn’t pay
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My x has my kids three of them two days a week. He pays no child support to me at all. I pay all school lunches, glasses, and any left over balances on any medical bills. I also pay for my two older boys phone monthly. I have been to court and lost because my x is considered poverty level and I am not. This used to bother me a lot. But now after doing this for the last two years, I have a different outlook. I may pay for 75% of my kids well being, but what matters is my kids are taken care of. Even thought their dad doesn’t help me, he still buys them clothes and I see them all the time come back to me with new shoes or new backpacks. That’s more important to me then left over bills and phone payments. So look to see what benefits you and your situation. Every one is different. My kids are being loved for by both their parents. I just pay for me as I bettered myself and my x did not.
Divorce, separation and singles group
Child support…
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Let him hang his self no matter what u do. It will only give everyone a excuse to blame u who cares what he buys for his bitch. He will distroy his relationship with his kids all on his own. And anything u say or do will come back on u. Take his ass to court maybe they might make him help u but even the court systems may fail u. Go for child support but if u are done with him let him be her problem now. Who cares about the ring give him time he will cheat on her
Go to the Attorney general and open a C/S case ,you will be awarded monthly support and back support
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Hit child support recovery…make him support his kid from an auto draft from his pay check
I have CS taken directly from his employer as ordered by cs
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You can go to court, get an order and CSU will garnish his wages. However, you are opening g yourself and your kids to him going to court and demanding full custody or 50/50 to reduce his payments. How are your kids going to do going with him a minimum of 50% of the time? Will he take care of them or just ignore or possibly harm them. I’d take my kids safety and happiness over money any day of the week. Only you know how far he will go but if hes a narc its gonna be all out war
Stop acting like you don’t know what to do and take his sorry ass to court.
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Get a child support order. Then he won’t have a choice.
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Am I the only one who was bothered by a few things in this. 1. Are u really co-parenting if it’s only 24 hours a week? 2. You know legally if he ever wanted to not return y’all child, police could not make him. They would make you take it to family court. By law, you both have equal rights. 3. Why even mention what he spend his money on or his new gf. This just shows you still have some personal issues to work out regarding your own personal growth. I say all that to say this… Court order visitations ASAP. Child support if he truly ain’t helping. I’m not 100% for child support, I believe once you get the state involved it not always the best. For example, they will go back to birth in back child support and my state CA charge interest. They need they cut as well. Anyways. Find a way let your feelings go and truly co-parent.
Court. And do not give up
Take his ass to court so he has to pay child support they will take it right from his check and you will receive it weekly based of what his income is my son is 11 yrs old and i just started getting child support so its never 2 late
Forget him . Do it yourself !!you and your kids don’t need a selfish person like that in their lives. Don’t bad mouth him on front of the kids but just stop trying. He’s not. You sound like a Great Mum! You can do this !! Big loves honey. don’t worry about his money . His new lady deserves him x
Court ordered. U can do legal aid. He will pay court. They send u money.
Get a CS order and be done with it. Sounds like some jealousy about rings and times waiting to be engaged. Get the order move on have a life of your own and enjoy it with your kids. You can’t make someone be a parent
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Maintenance enforcement
Take him to child support. Get a court order on it.
Send there ass to jail . They will pay, or run, bye bye…
Commonsense would say… Take him to court and move on. The ring could be on a 5yr payment plan at $50/mo… Just do it the legal way and be done with it.
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never check what he does for his bitch otherwise u will never heal,sometimes he might b doing this to hurt your feelings.mine left me four years ago n he had a white wedding with another lady n when he left me my little gal was three months now four years yet he never bothered to give me a cent to assist.since I totally removed him from my life I’m more happier n I will always work hard for my kids ,
Take him to court and get court ordered child support (and visitation if you trust him). My nephew is divorced and pays $1600/month for his 2 daughters plus summer camp and daycare costs! It’s crazy, he barely has enough to live on but they are his kids too. Luckily he considers them a priority although we all think he’s paying way too much. He does see them regularly, every other weekend and every Wednesday also.
If u were you. Ild count my blessings. Be grateful no one is forcing him to give u his money and be double grateful your kid only has to spend 24 hrs with that kind of person. Ur lucky. Move on.
Do it the legal way, court and if for any reason you receive public assistance (they WILL collect from him) …he needs to do his part and not leave it to just you. Failure to pay when ordered by the court can put him in jail/prison …his choice to not pay if ordered by the court. Some states take their Driver License among other things.
Get a child support order.
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Go for child support. Nothing else can be said about it.
You can get an order from the court. However, that doesn’t ensure he will automatically turn into a supportive father. I had an order but still never got anything. Hopefully this won’t be the case for you, but I wanted to prepare you just in case.
Get over the fact hes moved on and has a new fiance first. Who cares about rings and all. Just makes you sound pety. Go to court and get the child support ordered. Have them take it out of his check directly. If he doeant pay they will put warrants out for his arrest
I was in the same boat. I took advantage of the free consultation lawyers offer. I got great advice. Call those lawyers get proper legal advice.
It’s a very lengthy process, but court ordered support is the way to go. Just don’t ever depend on it. There’s loopholes that guys can use to get out of paying.
and pls do not mention the ring issue at court or lawyer, that makes you sound bitter and jealous. focus on your childs needs and pursue them
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Get a court order, file for child support , but then never depend on his money just let the process deal with him.
I’ve been on the same boat for 4 years, thousand of dollars in arrears and saw my kid once in 4 years .
If he is not there for your child don’t force him, he is only where he wants to be and means you and your child deserve better and you gotta step up to his plate ( hard but doable)
That kind of selfishness is why u and your child are better off , he is a bad example .
I’m sorry you have to go through this , hugs 
and strength
Sounds like he’ll never pay willingly go get legal help
Start CS, order. Keep allowing kids to go see him, document everything. As this shows you’re not keeping the kids from him, even though he isn’t providing for his children. Good luck
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What to do? You better get to Court and get your child support
Get the damn paperwork… fill it out… turn it in…
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Go to the child support office file a complaint then go to the court house and file for contempt of court and file your evidence of him sayin gm he won’t do it
let him sign them rights over. he provides no help financially or physically so wtf do the kids need him around for. if he keeps dead beating the kids will show him how important he isn’t. as for you don’t force him to be a responsible adult. let him fade off into the wind with his new trashy lady. and when the babies tell him how horrible he is than maybe he will understand
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Just go to the child support office and file. No if and or buts or arrangements. If he doesn’t want to see the kids well it happens
Go to your local child support office and file for child support. If he doesn’t pay, they’ll garnish his wages. Keeps it up he can go to jail for not paying.
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Get an attorney well versed in family law. You absolutley need an order of child support.
It is what it is …Dont rely on him i have the same thing but i dont care i have built my own life to support my kids with or without his help
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Tammy gave you the best advice you will have so take it.
Go to the county or state child support enforcement office and open a case. They will take it to court to get an order for Child Support that will probably also speak to his visitation if you put that into your application. Once you have the order, you can have him served with it and attach his wages if he has a full-time job. Your caseworker at the child support Enforcement office will help you work through all the details
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File a support order. It’s free. Go to the hearing. Abide by the judge’s ruling. Move on. You can’t make him do beans, stop trying.
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Put all emotions aside and go file at your local child support services 
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You don’t even need an attorney on this. Just go to your local State Child Support Division office. They will go after him for child support.
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File for support. It’s his obligation as a parent to also provide for yalls children.
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You go to work, live your life, and be happy you have a wonderful child who loves you. And NEVER bad mouth the other parent.
Walk away treasure your child if he don’t want them don’t take them and you don’t need his money if you been making it this far baby you got this just show your children who cares and loves them and they will understand as they get older if there is one thing I’ve taught my self is if you don’t want the time then I nor my child need you in anyway possible good riddance is how I see it
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Well- file for child support and get some counseling. It sounds like you may be a little bitter. 
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Get child support order as for seeing them if he doesn’t want to there is nothing u can do to make him I left my ex 7 yrs ago he hasn’t seen the kids in 6 yrs n is almost 3 thousand behind in child support so I wish you the best of luck
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I think I’m gonna file for child support my ex says the same thing and I’m raising my son with no help she buys him stuff once in awhile
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Suggest you get yourself over to your local child support office, file a petition and get a court order for child support. After that the child support enforcement people will see to it that your ex pays his child support.
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Take him to court for child support. That would be the best option.
File child support. Establish a custody agreement. Get into counseling to help you move forward with healthy habits.
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