Long story, but could really use some insight. I have 3 daughters. 16, 14, and 13. On 1/31 my husband was diagnosed with cancer. This past Monday, we found out it’s stage 4, meaning it’s spread to multiple places. A Radiology Oncology deals with everything neck and up. Regular oncologist deals with everything below the neck. He is currently in radiation for the brain. Next week he starts treatment for the cancer on the other parts. I have told my daughters everything, from whenever I find anything out, but keeping a positive attitude with them. My husband is on steroids and it has made him very irritable, has mood swings, and is just not himself. Adding cancer of the brain and radiation side effects, it’s made it so hard to deal with on top of the diagnosis. He can’t work, so I’m working, but leave work to take him to appointments, then most of the time for back to work. I’m also taking the girls where they have to be, or getting them from their regular after school activities. They are all teenagers and are going through this and their own things. It’s a lot for all of us. I was thinking therapy for each of them, but I’m at a loss. They all think it’s a great idea and would love them to see a therapist, but realistically, how?!? Getting 3 kids to therapy appointments and still working, and taking my husband to at least 3 of his appointments a week, plus my daughter’s orthodontist appointments for her braces. I work a Monday -Friday job. Most therapists here work the same hours I do. Missing more work is hard, when it’s not for his appointments. How can I’d do this? Is there an easier way?
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Can someone from the hospitals liaison team help you with some in home care for that? If not thru hospital maybe they could refer ?
There are therapist that do telephone and zoom visits I would call around and ask. This way the girla can do it when home after school. Juat a suggestion
Im sorry for everything you and your family have going on right now.
A lot of places are doing virtual talk therapy appointments. I would check with your local offices and see if there is an option for FaceTime, zoom, or teams appointments.
Covid definitely helped increase the number of tele health services (counseling and otherwise)
Maybe a support group for people in similar situations? Alot of hospitals have resources to these type of groups.
Is there family or friends nearby that can be a support? I think In person and that time away “for them” would make a larger impact. Or maybe set up appointments where they can go after school and take the bus there? Have their sessions back to back? When waiting have time to do homework and such? And just one pick up?
Check into zoom therapy, we do that here and my kids just each get a turn privately to their self then group therapy zoom every so often as well.
I do telehealth with my therapist, you can do it over the computer or the phone
Does the school have counselors they can talk to?
Therapy can be in home and that would be my best advice with 3, possibly 4 of you participating. Also I would add family Therapy if you can bc it offers a different perspective than individual
Just a thought why doesn’t the 16 year old get a license to held with the driving around? 
I’m sorry for all you’re going through. Sometimes the schools have counselors/therapist on site. Then they could meet during school hours and it wouldn’t effect their after school activities/ or your work schedule.
Idk where you live but here in Missouri kids have in school therapist. They can take then out of a non credit class spend one on one time with them. They never leave the school and it’s a big help with not having to transport them. If money is tight right now the schools have grants to help to. I would call your school see if they offer anything like that hope this helps!
Check with your insurance. A lot will help with getting him to his appointments at least. Therapist will work with you for zoom meetings/calls etc.
Check with mental health. They have a therapist that will go to the schools.
I agree with the telehealth therapy sessions most of the ones around me are all virtual on video. You should see if there’s a virtual support group or therapy for you too, you have a lot of on your plate. I’m so sorry for what you and your family are going through
Virtually could work too
Ask your school district if they have school based services
Can your 16 year old get her license to help out? Also have you checked their school to see if they have a therapists they can talk to
There are numerous places that do online therapy. Many of our local therapists do online and there are numerous companies as well worldwide
Sorry you are going through this, a lot of therapist are doing after hours,Sunday, and virtual I have resources as a social worker, let me know if I can help. One place is Deep Roots psychotherapy.
You need to check into your medical leave options. There is intermittent Fmla where you can take off as needed for appts etc and your job is protected. Talk to Human Resources. Also now days many employers have counseling appts available for you and family. Reach out for help from friends, church and cancer support organizations. Blessings your way.
Time for the 16 year old to drive!!
Our Cancer center here offers therapy for the family. Try thru them, if not I know they will def get them help some other place. But it’s free here thru them so I would try that first…
well the 16 yr old could Def get herself to an appointment same with the 14 yr old tbh depending on kid. Life sucks and as much it breaks parents hearts teenaged children need to step up too .
Yeah I was going to say you should be able to talk to the school office and explain the situation and get them all in with the guidance counselor there during school hours, they’ll take them out of a class for a little bit and talk to them. That way it’s not affecting your hectic schedule and they still get help. 
Hope this helps. Keep us posted if it becomes an option and things work out, as I hope to hear!
Get a hold of the American Cancer Society, they have programs in place to help you with stuff like this. Prayed for God’s comfort for you and your family
I know where I live your insurance will provide transportation to any appointments as long as you give them a 48 hr notice. Otherwise there are always facetime and over the phone options as well.
I’m sorry u guys are all going through this. Maybe see if there are places that can do virtual appointments for therapy that might help. Ik some schools might offer some sort of therapy where they can discuss things maybe check with the schools to see if its something they offer.
Maybe virtual appointment for the kids.
Praying for u and ur family
So sorry to hear this. My daughter has therapy and she does it at school through telahealth during specials. So it isn’t keeping her from her core content classes. I had to get it approved through my principal.
Hospice typically offers support in the way of individual and group therapy
Sorry momma:pray: I would check with who ever his medical is through for help they can arrange to have him picked up and brought home we also was able to get alot of help with my mom though hospice and Medicaid they where great and so helpful the cancer treatment center also offered for appointment pick ups … Good luck momma
Please God things will go well
Try seeing if any will do virtual I know where we live they do
Our Cancer Center has volunteer drivers…also the center has meetings of many sorts right there at the clinic!!! Try to get him to be positive for himself!!! Trust me I fought a horrible cancer battle and laughing praying and laughing some more keeps you going otherwise the chemo wins! Prayers 
What about in school? Some schools have their own as well as a visiting counselor. If this isn’t an option some child counselors will visit the child at school.
Tele A Medicine your girls can do therapy online via an app with a provider check with insurance for transportation
Lots of love and prayers
Prayers for you and your family.
Therapy is what you priorotize. Period.
It can be online thru an app.
Online therapy helps
I do know there are a few places that do online therapy. I’m not sure of the cost but it maybe something to check out. Sending prayers for you and your family
It takes a village…enlist help of friends and family. I’m so sorry you all are going through this. Hugs to you!
sending prayers for you and your family:pray:
BetterHelp it’s online therapy with real live therapists. I’ve heard such great things about it.
have you talked to the school, they may have help there, or maybe they would put out the word you need help I am sure some of their friends would help getting them to games. Also some churches will help with appt. and sometimes the hospitals can help with driving to appt. … you can not do everything ask for help I know its hard but you just might be surprised in people
I am sorry God go before him!
online therapy is a thing now since covid. and insurance covers it also
Have you looked into FMLA? See if your job offers it and
I am sure they can guide you on the process. But that will secure your job for appointments.
Try better help they have multiple therapist that will match up with your needs video chat, phone or in person $65/week for 45 min sessions
Contact your HR… they should have contacts to help you find a telemedicine counselor.
What about grandparents
I don’t have advice but I’m so sorry for what you’re going through.
First of let me say
How sorry I am to hear this
Its never easy for the family to deal with cancer and treatments
Perhaps include your kids in Drs visits and hospital visits
So they can hear what’s being discussed , what treatments are going to happen, and the effects this has in regards to his personality Changes, and other differences that may occur
I honestly think the more kids are included in these issues
The more they can understand what’s happening and why it’s happening
There might be something with the hospital or organizations that can help pick up your husband for his appointments. Also maybe the therapist can do over the phone visits. Or maybe some family or friends can help drive them.
Maybe tele-health would work best in this situation
Check with the cancer center that he is receiving radiation. There are typically therapists there that could help to point you in the right direction!
So sorry your family is going through this .
Any aunts or uncles ,grandparents who might be about to help some .?
Sending hugs and lots of prayers
I think a go fund me would help
Especially in your situation.
You definitely sound like you need to be home more.
They may be able to see their therapist at school. Not the school therapist but they’re actual one. A lot of practices will have their counselors go to schools
You can check with the school counselor and a lot of therapist are doing virtual sessions. It may also be easier and beneficial to find a therapist that will see them at the same time to discuss their father and everything he is going through and how it is effecting them individually and yall as a family.
Online therapy may be an option for your family.
I would definitely recommend some telehealth therapy. You should qualify for an assisted program with better health and then you and the kids can “shop around” for the therapist that fits with you the best. Im so sorry that you and your family are having to deal with this. Make sure to reach out to your community if you EVER need help. There are so many who would step up to make sure you are loved on and everyone is where they need to be.
Have you thought of hiring help? A nanny to drive kids around? Or home help care? You are the perfect clientele for services. Also do you have extended family nearby or a local community you’re involved in….a church perhaps? Lots of churches are willing to offer family aid for a stretch of time. I’m so sorry to hear your family is going through all this. My heart and my well wishes are being sent your way!
Sweetie- you need to get a hold of hospice and/or how /what your medical insurance people can help with. You can even talk with school counseling dept. for resources.
May Our Mighty Creator Bless Your Family Always my friend.
A lot of therapist are doing online. Also for activities for the girls could they care pool with the other kids doing those activities? Do you have any family or friends that can help out?
You can get them set up with a therapist and have their appointments on zoom so they can do them from their own bedroom
Telemedicine visits! A lot of providers are still offering it!
American Cancer Sociality. They can help a lot. Please reach out to them. Also his Case Manager can help you navigate you through this. Also file for his SS disability with the SS office. You will need a statement from his physician. But again reach out to the ACS. God bless you.
Try online therapy or video therapy with better help or something
they are teenagers, cant they make it to the appointments to give you a little break? they could go w each other so they are not alone. the biggest thing I got from all of this is YOU need a break or time to yourself, if you do not fill your own cup, you will not be able to fill theirs.
Check around a lot of places do telehealth on the phone now
Telemedicine but reach out to the school counselor and also the liaison of their school for resources.
Also check SSD your husband can get help. There are cancer you can look up that help out . Food stamps.
Hey there beautiful so my sister got diagnosed last year with colon cancer. A few months later they diagnosed her to stage 4. She had her surgery were they took certain organs out an now has a ostomy bag. When we first started the journey for her they did recommend all of her kids her husband an me an my brother to seak consulting. The cancer society or the radiation department should be able to point u to the right place for threapy. I honestly think its a great idea for them. Especially with them being teenagers. I also lost my dad in 05 to colon cancer an i honestly wished my mother would of seeked therapy for us. Because now that im having to go thru it with my sister it has mentally an emotionally has gotten to me. Prayers to your family lovve.
I know what you’re going through had to break news to my adult kids my youngest daughter is a daddy’s girl-she’s not doing well broke down and called my best friend who is her godmother-I’d say reach out to friends and family-love and hugs from Indiana
Not the same situation but my dad is currently fighting GBM stage 4 ( brain cancer ) and there is a group on Facebook that helps me at times. I’ll post the link below.
Wishing you and your family all the best with this new battle X
Try doctors on demand then they can schedule there appts. When they have time
Ask neighbors and friends for transportation help, or talk to their school counselor, they may be able to help.
They can possibly have telehealth appointments that doesn’t require you to drive. Call the local mental health clinic and explain the situation, chances are they will find a solution that will work for all of you to be supported in this challenging time. Prayers momma 
Check into getting disability for him, you may qualify for rides for him to treatment. Check with your local S R S they should have a list of services.
I do therapy via telehealth a lot which can be done at your own home. You could also check with the school to see if there is a counselor social worker that could meet with them regularly. It might not be actual therapy but it would give them someone to talk to. Some places do in-home therapy in person as well.
A- I am so very sorry for all you are facing!
B- my teens are in therapy remote… they do so via zoom and face time from home. As long as you have a laptop or phone, they can go to a quiet place in the house for sessions
God bless you as you do what your husband and children need. Reach out to family and friends for support. Praying for you!
Have you thought about having a youth pastor maybe do some counseling with them? And I’m also wondering if you have started a go fund me? I would love to be able to donate for you guys to help you out. This is just so sad
Most therapists offer zoom now. They can get on even if your not home
Have your 16 year old learn how to drive and I hope he’s the mechanics of getting to and from places and you have a second driver also if you want all for your kids to have a therapist make sure all the appointments are on the same day so that they can see who they going to see also maybe a family friend can help out AR or no look at your schedule and see what day’s work for you
So many counseling places are doing virtual visits right now! I’m so sorry for everything you are all going through
You can also do remote therapy or phone therapy I do it I know other places do it it’ll probably be more convenient cuz if you’re at work or she’s at work with you where you’re going somewhere else you can just use the phone and headphones by they are there appointment in a private space while you go do your thing
When you have your friends and family say, “Let me know of there’s anything I can do to help”…take them up on it! See if they can take one of your daughters to one of their activities.
Check with your insurance and hospital where he receives treatments, my hospital has a van that picks up and drops off at no charge. Insurance may offer that as well, hopefully this could allow you a little less stress. Prayers and good healing vibes to you and your family. Cancer is very rough on a family, I know after my chemotherapy sessions, I was not in the greatest of moods. Bless you for seeking help for your children. Hang in there.
When my mom got bad with cancer and had a risky surgery…getting into a good youth group where could have a good support system and get out with other teens and hang helped a lot. Plus the youth pastor pulling us aside to make sure we were ok and having talks with us if needed it. It was great! Maybe look into a good youth group that some of the people from their school may attend and see if they would be interested. My mom beat her breast cancer,but became a different person once got on pain meds. Youth group was my family after that. Helped me through a lot of emotions as a teen.
Are you comfortable letting the one needing an Ortho appt take an Uber??
Some places are still doing telehealth. Lifeworks some therapist still are there. Also their school should have a therapist that could see them while they are in school. ( side note: My dad died when I was 11 of prostate cancer. It’s hard. He was able to get disability. Then after he died all of us got death benefits until we either turned 18 or graduated high school. My mom also got it until all of us aged out)
I’m so sorry you are all going through this. Check with your school. I know our school has a contract for a private agency to come in and meet with kids during school hours.
Call or ask the hosp where he get treatment to get you into the cancer support group they will have one for youth as well it free there in the evening also they will work with the school counselors