What can my sister do about her son?

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My sisters 50 yr old son has moved in with her. He has a history of drugs, divorced and never sees his children. She can’t get him to work or leave. She has anxiety problems and this is making her worse. He isn’t on drugs now bc he has no money and lays in bed all the time. She can’t get him to get mental help and she’s about to go crazy. What does she do.
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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. What can my sister do about her son? - Mamas Uncut

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Go ahead and get a 30 day eviction notice. You can’t help those who don’t want to be helped. Sounds like he’s using her if he isn’t even wanting to get a job or make any effort with at least getting mental help. Tough love🤷‍♀️ why should she sacrifice her mental health for someone who isn’t going to meet her halfway.

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Give him 30 days to get job and contribute or get out.

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get a legal eviction process started. That’s all she can do

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She should ask her doctor for medicine to treat HER depression, then dissolve it into his meal or drink every day.

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Give him a written 30 day notice. If he doesn’t comply then go file for eviction.

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Have him do work around the house for rent. Lawn, paint, clean and all the remodeling that was never done. I would love a 50 year old at my house to help me out.

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Id say hes way too comfortable. You need to stop enabling him.
Hes 50yo not 10…bully him. Disturb him constantly. Dont cook for him or do his laundry.
Give him an ultimatum …Drs for his health . Up and out in the morning. Get a job. Contribute to the house or leave. Notice to quit in 30 days…make it a formal document …and contact the police if he wont leave peacefully.

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Shawnee alliance. That’s considered elder abuse.

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Don’t pay the electricity or buy groceries

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Tell him to get a job or get out! Sometimes tough love is the only option

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Have him involuntarily committed.

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Gibe him a eviction notice.

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Evict him and safe herself.

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Kick. Him. Out. :clap::clap: 30 day eviction from the courts, and kick him to the curb, if someone hasn’t grown up by 50, they never will.

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It depends if she rents or owns. If she rents, she may have to get her landlord involved. Simply tell the landlord that she said he could stay a few weeks until he got on his feet, but now he won’t leave. The landlord will evict.

If she owns her home, I suggest taking 3 steps.
First, give him a written notice that he has 30 days to find a job and start contributing, or he’s gone. If he won’t get a job, or at least start helping around the house while continuing to look for a job, then she needs to serve him with an eviction notice. She needs to type up the letter and send it to him via certified, restricted mail. This ensures that the mailman will walk to the door, knock, ask for him directly. He will have to sign, stating that he received the letter. If he still refuses to leave, take it to court for a formal eviction. A judge will grant it and she can schedule with the local Sheriff for them to come out and physically remove him from the house.

All of this will probably negatively impact any relationship that they have, but he is a grown ass man. It’s one thing to fall on hard times and need help, but he sounds like he’s just a straight up mooch and he will drain the life from her, as long as she allows it.

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Get in touch with agencies that deal with aging. She will need help with removing him. He is a danger to her and getting him out could be fatal. Look for a council on aging

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You could report him to adult protective services and she could start the eviction process.

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Call the cops? If she didn’t agree they have to remove him in some way

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He needs to get on board or move along.

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File eviction papers and evict him.

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Hide a open can of sardines in his room.

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Adult protective services . She can have him committed if it’s that bad. Any immediate relative can it doesn’t matter their age. I am a nurse and have worked in psych. They go in through er 24 or 48 he observation them when they find a bed he would go. Could be sooner depending on availability. If he doesn’t have insurance the hospital will help him apply for emergency Medicaid .

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Eviction notice. No turning back on it!

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Evict him. He needs to hit rock bottom in order to help himself.

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Give him m a time frame to have a job and contribute. Tell the police ahead of time to help in force this. Yes it’s heartbreaking but he chose this not you. Allow him to stay longer will make it harder.
Till then don’t cook for him don’t do laundry. It’s heart breaking but you count as does your health