What did you do when waiting for engagement?

What did you guys do when you were waiting for an engagement? I got on Google the other day, and apparently, it’s a whole thing. Our Four years is coming up, and I think it’s just about time.

1 Like

If you think its time, then pop the question.

1 Like

Umm yeah met my hubby in September was engaged June married in November.

1 Like

Have you talked to your partner about it?

1 Like

I made it clear in the first month that I was dating to find a husband. I wouldn’t be a girlfriend long so decided if that’s also your end goal because I don’t want to go further with someone who don’t have the same goals in the relationship.
We were engaged within a year and married before 2.

I’m never going to get engaged…been together 7 years. Moved in together 3 months after starting dating. Have a combined checking account and Bill’s and have a 4 year old son but he keeps saying he wont propose unless we can afford a wedding. I dont know how to make him understand I just want a damn ring and to be able to call him something besides my boyfriend. Ugg

I don’t believe in divorce, I don’t believe marriage is a step but I DO believe in marriage, in the promise, that each person has to make the choice on their own that it’s something they want. If it had to be pushed and forced he/she who had to be convinced didn’t really want it they are only doing it for you. I waited twelve and a half years for the engagement and married two weeks after our 13 years together anniversary, long wait but the happiest life.

2 Likes

My husband and I met july of 2005 by December we were engaged then married Feb 2006
still married

After 1.5 years I told him I loved him, I wanted him, but I had to have a reason to stay (in our tiny middle of nowhere town) He proposed 3 weeks later and we married that summer. Celebrated 11 years married this year.

1 Like

Yep. Going on 11 years. It SUCKS. I wouldnt wish it on my worst enemy.

2 Likes

I don’t know that I understand the question? You have to make your wants and needs known to your partner on what you’re looking for out of a relationship. If you’re 4 years in and you havent made what you want or need known it might be a problem.

6 Likes

It depends couple to couple my husband and me meet in june he asked me to marry him when he was drunk 2 months later I laughed an said ask me when ur sober less then a month later he ask me to marry him on a camping trip as he put it he knows I’m the one he wants to drive him crazy for the rest of his life jan. Of this year we pushed up our engagement cause we found out we were gonna have our son ( my first his 4th long story) an I knew i wanted to get married befor i was showing to much so we got married in feb 3 days b4 my birthday an even tho sometimes we drive eachother crazy we wouldnt have it any other way we celebrate 1 year together an our son will be roughly 5 months come our 1 year anniversary next year but i guess what I’m saying is u know when u know and if you think you guys are ready talk to him tell him hey no pressure but i feel we may be ready to take the next step an see how he feels u never know i knew from day one cause we had been talking as friends an I hit a low point an told him at 2 am I felt like driving my car into the pond an ending it all an he took no time at all to get to my place an we ended up staying up all night talking an we have been damn near together from that day on an I wouldnt change it bad days an all

I think it’s important to be on the same page when it comes to marriage. My husband and I became engaged after 2 years together and then we were engaged for 2 years before we married. So yeah, 4 years later for us but it never felt unnatural or forced.

You could always propose.

1 Like

My hubby and I started dating in July,engaged a month later,and married in Dec of the same year. We’ll be celebrating our 24th anniversary this year!

Ive been in a couple long relationships and marriage has never been high on my priority list. Until i met my current boyfriend anyways, I just know hes the one, it will be a year next month since we started dating and im waiting on a ring lol. My birthdays coming up and hes been dropping some hints but I can tell you if it doesnt happen by this time next year he is getting ultimatum cause I’m about to be 28 and i want to be married before im 30!

1 Like

We dated for 3 months, engaged for 3 and got married after 6 months total together. We have been together 5 years. It was quick and we have had our rough spots where we didn’t think we would make it but we love each other more now than ever. If he is your best friend and your willing to continue to wait fine but if you know you know. :heart:

1 Like

I was with my husband for 8 months before we got married. No engagement it was kind of spur of the moment. 5 years of marriage now

1 Like

I proposed to my husband after 3 years cause I got tired of waiting for him :woman_shrugging::laughing:

1 Like

I don’t get it if it’s that much of a big deal propose to him/her why do you have to be the one being proposed to

4 Likes

I think it would be weird to constantly ask your partner if they are going to propose. I mean wouldn’t that make them not want to at all? Usually if your partner is ready they will plan it out and do it. I’m sure it takes time and money to even do it. Engagement ring it’s self is really expencive then to add a wedding ring to it is even more expensive. Idk that’s just my thought, plus you don’t have to ve married to be in love.

2 Likes

Spent 7yrs with one guy… Sons sperm donor. But we starting dating -highschool- young.

My husband and i knew eachother for years (sat next to each other in Geometry in hs lol), were (strictly) friends during my 2 yrs single after i left my ex. Finally started dating and was engaged within a yr and married the next year.

I feel like after a point ya gotta make sure you’re on the same page and not wasting time.

1 Like

Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell have been together since 1983. Marriage doesn’t define your relationship, the way you feel about each other does. You don’t need a piece of paper to prove it.

4 Likes

Is it mutually something you both want? It has to be mutual for him to even think about, let alone plan and execute. Talk, communicate. My bf of. Almost 4 years “proposed” to me a few times, but I didn’t take it serious. I just thought, he’s just being cute, and never took the hint of ”proposing” to me. Now he says if I want to get married, I’d have to ask. It just depends on your relationship and what the other person wants, it’s not always about you, or whats trending. Google isn’t always a great source for relationship advice.

We always said we’d get married but than it wasn’t spoke about for ages! I use to bring it up drunk sometimes tho :joy: I thought It was never gonna happen tbh… but I got engaged 8 days ago, on a beach in Portugal in front of the sunset on my birthday :clap::sob: I wasn’t expecting it at all, what’s meant to be will be, don’t lose hope :heart:

I proposed to my husband because I knew he wouldn’t

I told my boyfriend if he wanted to be the one to ask me, he had to do it by our fifth anniversary or else I’d be doing it. I told him this after we’d been together for over 3 years, he popped the question a few months before our fifth anniversary lol.

Ive been with my fiance since October 2019… We got engaged officially 3 weeks ago.
We made our wants and needs known in the very beginning and laid out exactly what we were looking for.

Some guys just don’t want marriage anymore. I’d gives some hints and wait another 6 months.

I kept asking when we were going to get engaged. This was aroumd 6 or 7 years. He’ll pop the question when he’s ready.

My husband proposed after 9 years of dating! We have been married for 8 years with 3 wonderful children and have been together for a total of 17 years!! :flushed:

1 Like

Girl I waited 6 almost 7 years for my engagement…:joy::joy::joy:

1 Like

It took my husband and I 9 years and two kids later to get married. :woman_shrugging:

1 Like

Why rush things? My now husband and I got together at 18 we got married last year. We lived as married before hand. The only thing that changed was my name and boy was it a headache to do that with all the legal stuff. Don’t get me wrong I’m glad we got married I just don’t understand why people feel the need to be like “ if we aren’t married within 2 years I’m out” is that how you define love?

1 Like

Then what are you waiting for? Propose already!

4 years!! Try 10!!! I’m stiiiilllllll waiting :neutral_face:

Talk to him, find out how he feels. Every one is different what works for some may not work for you. We moved in together 1 month after our first date. He broke up with me 4/5 months later then found out I was pregnant. 4 months later we got back together. Lived together then got married when baby was 16months old. Had another baby. We almost divorced from an affair he had. Worked it out. Been married 29 yrs. and are best friends. Enjoying life together.

6 Likes

My husband and i were together for a little over 3 years when we got married. We had a 2 and a half year old. (Dont do the math)
Everyone has their own timeframe. Have you discussed marriage? If you love and trust someone enough to expect them to propose, i suggest talking to them and discussing it.

2 Likes

I waited 6 years, but we have kids and were already living together. I didn’t feel the need to be engaged by any certain time. Some things happen when you least expect them. Enjoy your time together and don’t rush an engagement.

1 Like

I was with my ex for 8 years and he never asked. We had a kid 3 years into our relationship, he said he would ask when he was ready and never did then we started fighting all the time and when we split for good he kept telling me “I was going to ask before you ruined everything” :roll_eyes:
Started dating a new guy and he asked on our one year anniversary and we’ll be married on our two year anniversary.

18 Likes

I just celebrated 9 years with my man and I’m still waiting. I’ve been married once and I refuse to do it again when I’m not 100% sure my partner is fully ready for that.

We talk about it all the time. We know we both want it but I think he’s waiting to catch me off guard. :woman_shrugging:t2: I told him he needs to do it soon cause I’m starting to feel like we are no longer on the same page.

I’m not sure. Honestly, a marriage certificate is just a piece of paper. If you love each other why does it matter. Then again I am 47 and if my marriage does not work out there will not be a #2

2 Likes

My husband and I got together January 1998. Our son was born May of 1999. He asked me in 2000-2001. Our daughter was born March of 2008.We got married in 2016. :blush: Had a lot of ups and downs. Split a few times. But through it all, we are soul mates. What works for one, does not work for another. If you love each other, what difference does it make how long it takes? That piece of paper doesn’t make you a family. Commitment does. Just as well as that piece of paper does not ensure commitment. :purple_heart:

2 Likes

We were together total 9 years, he asked me to marry him at the 2 1/2 mark for me it would have been my 2nd marriage. I said yes but we never actually got married I kept coming up with reasons to hold it off eventually we broke up because of other reasons

We did it all backwards I guess. Baby was 3 when we decided together we wanted to be married. Not sure of a time frame other than what you think is appropriate for you. I hope it all works out.

1 Like

I would say if he showing some signs as in talking about family or what would you name your kids if you have kids one day… then you would know engagement will happen , maybe he wants it to be perfect ,
It takes time , I married my best friend , friends since 2004 , date in 2009 and engaged 2014 , married 2015 and two kids later & going strong

Well…our first date was 12/85…he asked me to marry him on 1/86…we were married on 9/86…and are still growing strong. I am blessed!

8 Likes

My husband “proposed “ to me a year and half after we started dating. 6 months later we went to the court house and got married just because my mom was in town at that time. We will be married 21 years this November. My ex fiancé he proposed 3 years after we started dating and 6 weeks before the wedding broke up with me. Which happened to have been around our 5th dating anniversary

It took my fiancé 5 years to pop the question lol we have been engaged since March 2019, no date set bc right after we got engaged he lost his job, and I couldn’t pay for the wedding, plus everything else. He just got a new, full time job he likes, so I’m hoping we will set a date soon!

I was engaged for 6 years before marriage. Stayed married for 20 years. Him never being able to make his mind eventually drove me away. Learned it was on everything. Pay attention to those kinds of things. If it’s right it will happen. …and when it does, let us know!

There was never really an engagement for me…and I wasn’t expecting one. But this happened 2yrs 10 months into our relationship. We were sitting in my mom’s kitchen and she was like, “You guys should get married.” Then he says “yeah, sure.” 2 months later we have an Elvis wedding in Vegas.

1 Like

Asked me to marry him a year into it…got the real proposal 2 years later…waited 2 more years which by then we had a 3yo a 1yo and i was 9 months pregnant with our 3rd when we got married… Lol here we are 8 years later (3 being married) with a 6 yo, 4yo, 3 yo, and a 2 month old :laughing:

We’ve always talked about it and I’ve said I don’t want to be proposed to till we’ve got all our children as I want them to be part of the day. We’ve been together 12 years. I’ve said now that I don’t want to be older than 35 and I’m 31. Talk talk about it is best.

My now husband asked me to marry him after 10 years BUT we are high school sweethearts, so it was kinda a given. We lived together, had a baby lol

Oh hell, I didn’t wait. I was trying to STOP it. He proposed after 6 months and I was in no way ready. He proposed again 2 years later. Then we had a 2 year engagement. Now I’m happily married after thinking I’d never be here.

1 Like

My husband asked me about a month after we met. We met in Dec of 2011, married March of 2012. We’ve been together for just over 8.5 years. We have 2 girls and another one due in November. It’s definitely been rough. I wish I would’ve waited longer and not rushed it. There’s been some infidelity between both of us, definitely more from him. I’m not sure what’s made me stay after all we’ve been through. But we do have our good times together. We’ve even done counseling. My opinion is, don’t rush it. Make sure that he’s the absolute one before getting married. It’s easier to get in than out.

Everyone is different and has different opinions on marriage, I’ve been with my SO for 10 years Sept and I’m in no rush, (he’s still in finalized stage of divorce anyway . . We financially couldn’t do it before) I’m perfectly happy the way we are as I’ve seen what marriage can do to relationships and i don’t want that for us.

My partner and I have been together for going on 7 years I already had a son of 1 year when we met and he raised him. At 4 years I got pregnant with my daughter. He says he doesn’t want to marry me until we buy a house first. I understand what he means but then I also would love for him to propose. Is that normal since we already have 2 kids together?

Why wait for years? I dont understand, you either get married or you dont. What does an engagement actually mean? Is it a time when you save money until you can afford a marriage? Is it a time you wait while you decide if you love each other enough to commit? Just get married if you want, time doesnt wait for anyone, you could be dead tomorrow, do it today and enjoy each day.

There’s not a time limit. Each relationship and the people in need to be at that spot. On the same page and both at the same level of life long commitment. When your engagement happens you truly want it to be bacause he has realized he wants to go on the journey of life with you and not because he feels it’s time to be engaged. I hope you get the proposal you want/deserve and may you both live happily ever after. :church::ring:

2 Likes

My husband and I both had long-term relationships before we met. We knew what we wanted and got engaged 8 months after we met. Married 6 months after engagement. When it feels right, you know it so why wait? Life is too short. Unless you don’t believe in marriage.

We were engaged 2 months after meeting and married 3 months later… It’s been 14 years now. If it’s right you just know. I would of never waited around for years.

1 Like

We got engaged at 9 months, married before 1 year, got pregnant with our first child together 3 months later and 10 months after she was born, got pregnant with our last :joy:. We’ve had some hard times, but I couldn’t imagine my life without him, or all of our crazy kids!
You could absolutely go ahead and start picking out little things you want for your wedding though! No time limit for that, could get you more excited too.

I did what I did every other day…enjoyed my time with the person I loved and our son. We got engaged when he was ready to ask and not because it was something I nagged him to do. We were engaged 2 yrs after getting together and married about a year and a half after he proposed.

Told mine 2 years at the most. Can’t be waiting around forever. I set that expectation early on and meant it too.

1 Like

We were together 11 years almost 12 before getting engaged. Got married the days before our 13 years. As long as you’re committed to each other it’s just a piece of paper. But I understand completely

:woman_shrugging: everyone’s different… just had our 9 yr anniversary, still not engaged, have a 7 yo together, and neither of us really care (about being ‘engaged/married’- we know we’re together for the long haul and that’s that. Also, both of us have had pretty shitty experiences with failed marriages of those around us throughout our life- both our parents, close family members… we feel we don’t need to be married to be together in a loving and fulfilling relationship/ family)

It took him 15 years to pop the question i thought it was never going to happen and i was not waiting for it eather and last Christmas he finally decided it was time.

I observed him how he was going to be as a father for our first born I actually wasn’t expecting him to do it and then when she was 3 months he proposed on our movie night.

Idk I’ve been with my youngest childrens dad for almost 3 years and have wedding fever so bad

My husband said he knew he was going to marry me after 2 weeks of dating. I had been engaged before and was in no rush. He proposed officially 2 years in…I found out I was pregnant 4 months later and refused to get married pregnant. He was mad but I knew how I wanted my wedding. We were married in September when our first daughter was 8 months old. We’ve been married 11 years and now have 2 daughters and a son.

Ask him girl!!! Have a few drinks and mention it casually. It doesn’t have to be a big deal. But you gotta know if you’re asking us!!! Best of luck

We met in October of 2001, by April 2005, we had 2 children. We got engaged in the summer of 2007 and were married in June of 2009. We have been together 19 years, married for 11 of those.

My fiance proposed on our one year anniversary. We will be actually getting married on our 6 year anniversary :joy: he wanted to ask, I wanted to wait to get married. :woman_shrugging: do what works for you.

Took us 5 years and a kid to get married. He got married to his girlfriend when they were still in high school and it was a really bad experience for him.

I was understanding and knew no matter what I wanted to be with him. Then he proposed.

Wow been with hubby for 23yrs and we rarely have spoken about marriage. We’re very happy how we are and I have no intention of leaving

Who ever said you have to wait for HIM these days??? ASK HIM to marry you…make it a romantic proposal!! I’ve been with my guy for almost 9 years…3 months ago I asked HIM and he said YES :smiling_face_with_three_hearts::smiling_face_with_three_hearts: If he says no then you have your answer on your relationship!

Got married within 30 days of dating known each other for 9 years August 1st 14 years going strong,when you know you know if somebody is making you wait that long or you’re waiting for that long maybe you reevaluate

My husband proposed after 6 months. We were married 2yrs later. We’ll be celebrating our 10yr wedding anniversary next month.

We have 4 children and have been together for 16 years…i accepted it a while ago. Sometimes i think about marriage but then it trips me out

I stayed with my boyfriend 5 years. Now we are married 22 years!

Smart to keep your maiden name. For legal purposes. Getting a star driver’s license would be much easier.

…I’m on year 8…will be 9 years in Novemeber.

We just started talking about it seriously within the past month…I still don’t expect it but know it’s coming sooner than later… if it’s meant to be…itll be.

Not sure why people in 2020 are waiting to be asked. We decided together to get married and that was 18 years ago. Just have a conversation.

He asked 15 yrs ago… I backed out. But were still together.

My Husband and I dated 8 years before getting married and had our first born at our wedding

If he hasn’t proposed by year two, dump him and move on.

1 Like

We got together in 2015 and got engaged February 2019… neither of us are in a big push to get married… Have you tried talking to your significant other about what the future looks like??

I think after a few years they Arnt going to come around tbh, you no after 3 or 4 years atleast if you want to spend your life with someone

I waited four and a half years, then bought tons of Bridal Magazine and put them all over our apartment. LOL. He got the hint.

Just got engaged last Sunday…I waited 10 yrs…2 kids.

1 Like

My hubby and I dated one year before we got engaged. Married 6 mos later and we’ve been together 49 yrs!

Hmmm there isn’t a time line that is right or wrong and I wouldn’t be disappointed if your partner isn’t on some time line

I waited 11 years & 2 kids later!!! Getting married in September!!

1 Like

As a person who has been married for 25 years, from parents who are married 55 years, and Grandparents who were married 60 years, I always told my daughter that a man knows pretty quickly if he wants to marry someone. The first time I met her husband I knew he would marry her. They were married last summer.
If you have been together for that long and he’s not ready. He’s probably not worth the wait. Jmo based on what you posted.

19 Likes

Me and my husband was together 9 years 3 babies later ages 8,6,4 when we finally decided to get married everybody always thought we was married before anyways

I’ve been with my boyfriend/fiance’ for 21yrs this September…we moved in together after only 1month.
Why fix what isn’t broke?

I lived with him for nine years and also never asked

My husband proposed after 3.5 years. My sister’s fiance proposed to her after 10 years. Just depends on the man I guess 🤷

We got married after 6 years of dating. We’ve been married for 7.5 years now.

1 Like