I have two children from a previous relationship and one with a new spouse, he has two sisters who don’t like me due to their own assumptions about me. They booked family photos for their mother and father (my son’s grandparents) as a Christmas present but didn’t speak to me or my spouse about the date or anything to see what days would work for us as a family. I don’t have my daughters from my previous relationship on the day they booked because they are with their dad. They are telling me to bring my son anyway and have photos done with out my other children and it doesn’t sit right with me that they expect it of me. How would you guys feel and react?
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I would decline and tell them we are a family and so it’s either all or nothing next time communicate
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Skip their appt. Make you’re own with all of your family. If they aren’t including all of you, they get none of you. Family portraits will be done separate.
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If your husband isn’t going support you on this subject then let him know it’s either you and kids or his family
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Put yourself in your childrens place , how would you feel as a child to see a family photo and your missing in picture!! Hurtful !!! Never do that
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Hun they know when there with your ex 
Maybe talk with the ex … see if you could have them for just a few hrs . And ether say you owe him one for when he’d need them on your time or give him a couple extra hrs on one of your days . 
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My niece from my brother’s previous relationship wasn’t included in my brother’s family photos, she was 5 and saw the pictures at my moms house and said “why wasn’t I in the pictures?”
Kids notice, I’d opt out.
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Try to borrow some time from the girls dad or trade weekends.
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My in-laws love my children. Even call them Mimi and Papa! Even when we have my bonus child, my 3 are still included in everything. My mother in law just adores my children like they’re her own, which they are. She’s never made them feel like anything less!
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Definitely say no. Not only will the girls wonder why they weren’t included but when your son gets older he will wonder why as well. Don’t even get me started as to why I would say no when it came to your spouses sisters.
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Talk to your other kids’ dad and see if you can either switch weekends with him or at least have the kids for a few hours that day so your whole family can participate.
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If all my kids can’t go, I’m not going. Plain and simple.
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See if dad will let you switch time (assuming you both coparent decently for the kids). If you don’t have your kids, I would absolutely not go nor would I allow one of my children to be in “family photos” if all of my children were not able to be. That’s messed up they even suggest it
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See if you can get the girls for the photo shoot. If not, then the three of you should go, anyway. Keep in mind that it’s a present from the daughters to their parents. Or, if you prefer, book a family photo session for you and your spouse & all of your children, and make that a present for your in-laws.
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My kids are my family so no, I wouldn’t do them without having them there. You would think that would be a given and without question. Weird
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They would have to reschedule to a day where it can be everyone. With me it is all or nothing.
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I would never allow my family to take photos without my stepson and to be honest they wouldn’t even think of doing that. I’ve been with my spouse over 15 years and they’ve always treated him like the rest of our kiddos. He’s no different just bcuz he’s not our blood. He is my son no matter what. We do things as a family. Nobody gets left behind. My sis n law even took my daughter to Disneyland when they were younger because she took her son and my stepson and I’ve always appreciated that about her. My daughter had a blast! It truly is horrible that some people are that toxic that they don’t realize that kids are smart and notice things. So when they are left out of family functions and you have no guilt about it, dont be surprised when you get treated a certain way too 
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THIS 
IS WRONG
I’d personally decline the invite and say you want your entire family there
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All or None! Reschedule with the family or talk to the ex about switching weekends… whatever you have to do but I’d say everyone goes or no one goes. YOU are your children’s only advocate!
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This is very delicate situation u must be the one who will step out and decide, because children must be involved in all activities not to wonder why i wasn’t present there, we think they won’t notice or they won’t know but they do. Children must be involved in this type of activities no matter what, all or none! IT’S A BIG NO GO FOR ME TBH! DON’T ACCEPT THIS! ITS DISRESPECT!
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I speak for all of the moms and say “nope.”
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I guess I’m the odd ball but I say let him and your son take the pic don’t include yourself no telling if it’ll last anyways.
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I would work something out with their dad to keep them that day. We don’t do strict schedules here. We switch it up when need be. Healthy coparenting works wonders.
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I wouldn’t go that’s not okay.
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I would just send dad and his kid. if dad had a problem with that I’d explain I don’t feel
Comfortable not including OUR girls.
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I’d go and take pictures. You can always take more pictures when your daughters are with you. If the sisters are setting up the pictures then work around that schedule, they are thinking of their parents at the moment, not your other children. What does your husband say?? That’s who you need to be talking to about it.
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That would be a HARD NO GO for me!!! It would be my whole family or NONE!!! Even if your husband and his child would go it would definitely hurt your girls emotionally in several ways! And always make them question where they stand with the family! I have First hand experience and actions speak louder than words. Not being included and constantly seeing that pic without them on the wall WILL make them feel they aren’t considered part of that family (only their brother is which could cause resentment towards him even though he’s not at fault), feel unloved by them, constant questions run through their head (why,what they did wrong), make them unsure to believe when told I love u by them! Please for their sake either no one goes or try to get bio dad to switch a day or allow u to have them for a few hours.
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I wouldn’t go at all
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I have two children from a previous marriage. And 2 with my husband now. When I got pregnant with my husband and I first kid… he told everyone it’s all or none. You accept all the kids or you get to miss out on all of them.
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Nope. It’s the whole family or none of the family. Also if people don’t ask if we’re free and just demand our time then they don’t get any of it. GL
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I don’t know what your relationship with their father is like, but if it’s positive then I would ask to have your girls for the time of the appointment and return them after and offer him some bonus time as a thank you. If that’s not possible then I wouldn’t be going for family pictures
I don’t know but the kids have their own families. You don’t request their dad take all of the kids when its2his time to visit now do you.
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I’m sorry not sorry and may seem petty, but a lot of comments read to switch days/time with children’s dad, but why? To accommodate the hatefulness of the sisters? They absolutely knew what they were doing when they scheduled the appointment. I stand up for my children, you don’t want them in your so called “family photo”? Then that means you don’t want my family and I will be scheduling our own family photos. Simple as that.
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this hurts my heart. I would speak to your ex and ask if you could pick up your other two and bring them along.
Let your in laws know you have managed to get some time with them how great.
They will just have to deal with it!!
Oh no they didn’t. Those three kids and your husband are your family and leaving your daughters out is absolutely wrong and will for sure hurt their feelings forever every time they see those pictures at the grandparent’s house. I would hope your husband would stand up for you saying you and all three of the kids is his family and if they don’t want to reschedule to when the girls are home then count you all out. Don’t let them bully you….all or no one 
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I grew up in blended family and honestly I’d go do it. Your son shouldn’t be left out of the family pic just because you want to accommodate everyone in my opinion… it’s not for you it’s for the grandparents so I guess it’s on them who they want in it
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I would try everything I could to make it happen but if I can not then I would decline the entire thing.
My family always catered to include my step son. They changed celebrations, vacations etc.
In the end he couldn’t even show up for my mom, my dad, or his own brothers funeral. He has only came to his dad 3 times in the last 15 years. His dad always has to go to him.
So now I have so much resentment. I should’ve never tried so hard to include him in his step family.
Honestly, if all my children were not included I would not go. Schedule a different day for pics with grandparents.
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So I know when my moms side of the family was doing a family photo, my sister and I could not be there because we were at our dads. The photographer had my sister and I come in a different day and take our photos. He then photo shopped us into family photo. You couldn’t even tell we were photo shopped in. This was like years ago. Could photographer maybe do something like that?
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Big group family photos are so annoying… for these reasons! If you want to do photo gifts, do it by households. That way you can plan for all of your children to be involved and not have to give a 
what the in law siblings think or want
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I would talk with your kids dad and see if y’all are able to have the kids there. Hopefully it won’t be a problem. I’m sorry that this is happening, I hope everything works out.
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I’ve been that child. Left out because I wasn’t “family” and it hurt everytime I saw my sibling in the family photo with all the cousins except me. It’s just aweful people doing that. I would decline the photo.
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Tell your husband to ask them to reschedule. If they “can’t” ask your ex to let you have them for pics and he can keep them longer whatever day you get them back OR ask to swap wkends w him, if he refuses, politely tell your husband the 2 of you will not be leaving out any of y’all’s kids, you don’t mind having your personal family pics made and order them one and don’t mind if he (alone with zero kids) goes to have his pic made with his extended family. If that doesn’t go over well suggest he books a different photographer on a date that all 5 of you can go & tell his sisters when to show up
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Tell them since it is family photos and the other children are present that they are on their own because we don’t leave out family members. If they’d like to reschedule and be inclusive then it’s a different story and has to be on a day that works for all not just them.
Your husband should be the one to let them know how this makes you feel. And he should support your feelings and decisions. Or atleast listen and find a good compromise
Nope wouldn’t happen unless u could speak to their dad to see if u could pick them
Up for a few hrs so they can be in the picture
My ex husbands sister did that. Well she ‘made’ a frame with all the grandchildren but didn’t include my daughter from a previous relationship. I was so angry. She did it on purpose. Then played stupid. The ex tried to stick up for her. That whole family is awful. I’d absolutely not go if the girls aren’t included. You are a family. Xx
I am a step mom. I would have scheduled it when we had the kids. That’s respectful of you as well as them. That way there’s no drama. I hope y’all can work out something so the kids can have a memento of their grandparents. I would be worried the kids would resent the fact that I kept them away from this important day. Talk to the kids about it as well as Dad all in the same room and at the same time. That’s called a family meeting. You are all family… Forever …family. That includes the bonus parents and kids.
I’m going to ask how long have you guys been together is it something you’d be okay with your spouse just taking baby for a little while by himself?
I’m only asking because I would just send him and baby if you don’t want to participate without yo
Your other children (which I fully agree cause I wouldn’t either) but I do make it a tendency to get a picture of my first 4 kids for there dad and one of just baby for his dad and some of him and baby and some of other 4 and there dad together and then me with all my kids and then me and baby’s dad with all the kids
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It’s not such a big problem just tell them on that date ur whole family will not be together can they reschedule the photo shoot if not unfortunately u and ur hubby won’t be ale to make it simple
Ask your ex to take them for a couple of hours for the photos but don’t tell your inlaws just surprise them and watch there reaction
Can almost guarantee they would of known you wouldn’t of had your daughters 
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Is it because they set a date and didn’t ask you? Maybe its the only time others have available or only time slot? Doesn’t sound like they booked it knowing your other 2 are at dads that weekend on purpose? How many others are going? May just be “who ever can come - come? Personally I wouldn’t go without out all but there may be reasons beyond you- why they cant change it to fit your schedule. 
If they didn’t discuss dates with you I wouldn’t
I’d ask their father if he would let you have them long enough for the pictures, and if not then I wouldn’t do them at all
Um I wouldn’t go if one child can’t come. Tell them you aren’t going without your daughter because you don’t want to and it would hurt her feelings. If they push, tell them you don’t want your daughter seeing herself not in the family photos and you don’t want to have to explain that her grandparents excluded her and her mother and step father allowed it
I would tell them no. Your children need to be included too or none of you will be. That’s not cool
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I would politely say no thank you. Either all of my children are included or none. Sorry if that’s inconvenient but no one informed you of dates and tried to work dates out that would work for all of you guys.
Sounds like they do not accept your precious children and purposely scheduled when you don’t have them. Shame on Them!
I would absolutely not go without my entire family present
That’s not right. I have a cousin that is married to a woman that has two kids from a previous relationship. I booked pictures and made sure she knew to bring those babies. I hadn’t even met the kids but they are family. As a mama I wouldn’t want to take “family” pictures without my whole family. Those women need to be sat down and your husband needs to let them know that those kids are his too! I do say that you don’t need to let the kids know what has happened, no sense in hurting their feelings and maybe his sisters will do right and this never had to be an issue again. I sure hope everything works out! I am so sorry you are dealing with this!
Y’all all up in here talking about all or nothing but fail to realize that her children have 2 sets of families making memories with thier extended families. Guarantee she’s not bent out of shape when the last child is left out of activites that the older kids experience with their dad and his family. Make it make sense
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Bought my MIL a necklace with all the grandkids names on it(at the time). She didn’t like nor has worn it because it had my children on there
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I would not go.
I recently cut off my partners aunty, 2 x uncles & his grandmother for this exact reason.
My eldest isn’t bio his, but that’s his dad.
They made a snide comment regarding that.
So guess who doesn’t get to see ANY of MY kids?
Them
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I’d say I am gonna pass as you know the days I get my daughter’s and we are a family it’s all of us or none of us so we will book a day that suites us for our own family photos thanks
Nope they can have your whole family or none at all.
Trade weekends. That’s what I had to do when my husbands family did the exact same. I REFUSED to take photos without my oldest.
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If it’s for a few hours talk to the ex ask if you can have them from example 1-3 or flip weekends with him explain the situation to your ex hopefully you coparent well 
My gma had this little frame of a apple tree and the apples were the frame. She had every grandchild EXCEPT me and my twin. Her son always denied paternity of his last 2. 23 and me proved after his death that he was wrong.
My response would be…
All of us, or none of us.
Just say no and don’t show up at all then
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It would be a definite no from me.
Well how many people total does this involve? Could be a convenient thing. Do y’all work?
Just get the photo live and let live. If You want one with everyone then set it up yourself. Choose your battles .
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My ex family did exactly that🤷
I’d decline and do my own .
Oh hell no. I’d say we are unavailable untill the other kids can be there too
They did that on purpose- don’t even bother showing up.
all or nothing definitely. Tell them you are a family, maybe ask your ex if you could swap access days
So I would personally would not be attending
What does your husband say about all of this? I wouldn’t do it.
Book your own session. I’d go to their session, but I would also do my own and then use it as Christmas card that way everybody could see lol
Ask if you can get your daughters visit changed, so they can be there also
Miss the appointment. Be like oh whoops I forgot. I was with my family
Either call and reschedule or don’t go
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It would be all or none
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Im petty…id book my own family session and no include them
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All of us or none at all.
skip it and do your own
If he does back you up. I wouldn’t stick around.
Well I think your husband not you has to set things straight. If he chooses not to back you and your children you chose wrong in a man and I would seriously start making plans to divorce. My mother in law is the same luckily for me we don’t have kids. She excludes me pretty much from almost everything but invites everybody’s exes to big parties. Let your husband handle it if he doesn’t then don’t make yourselves available period.
That’s kind of messed up. I wouldn’t have my son there if the other two couldn’t be involved because not only would that make your girls feel bad it would probably make their brother feel bad too and wonder why they aren’t in it.
I’ll say my man would be pissed and tell his family to F off if they intentionally planned something leaving my girl out. Her dad and I do swap days a lot because of parties or events or whatever so I could always have her for the pics but if she was excluded and they didn’t even try to get her in the pics I’d just not go at all, and neither would he.
All or nothing if my kids aren’t attending I don’t want to either. Just my 2cents
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I’d be upset too. The moment y’all said I do those kids became his as well. Maybe book your own family photos. That’s what I’d do
I’ve been in a similar situation - my family comes with me, or we don’t go at all, that simple 
Idk I would think it’s intentional and I wouldn’t go. How are you gonna do family photos without your whole family.
I would say if all the children can’t be in it, then none will be
Nah. It’s a No from me!! You aren’t going to have one if you can’t have the other two. Blood or not!! That’s really petty of them.
Either ask their dad if they could come just for the pics then leave again, or font go at all
My family just did a professional collage shaped like a heart and had every family choose photos to submit. Each family was assigned a number of photos to send based on how many kids they had. It was fair for everyone, and no one had to try to meet at once.