Keep calling the police. Be very careful speaking to her anywhere her husband can see you ESPECIALLY because you are pregnant and you do not know what will set him off. Try to reach out and speak with her at the park…neutral territory and less suspicious of he does see you talking. Call an abuse hotline in your area and ask for advice and info on what to do and what options are available in your area so you can share it verbally when the time is right. Befriending her will be a good start and a park playdate would be a good start. Just be careful what you write that could be found by the husband. Thank you for standing up for her when she can not stand up for herself.
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Women most of the time protect their abuser. They also cover up for their husbands breaking other laws.
Try to get recordings for the police so then they have something to go off, if the police then think something is going on then they shall call the cps, ultimately the cps can do investigations and call the police aswell. As the saying goes better to be wrong then to be sorry later.
Don’t call CPS on her unless u are positive. They will/could take the child away. Have you tried knocking on the door when he’s not around? And telling her what u hear and ask her if she wants help? She could be forced to turn the cops away.
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Make friends with her if you can maybe she’s scared that if she says anything about him abusing her in case he kills her? Maybe she feels like she doesn’t have the support of anyone who is willing to listen one day she will open up to you about it?
help her and before its to lste for her or 9ne of her kids
Keep calling and reporting. I grew up like this in a DV situation and everyone turned a blind eye to what was going on.
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Unfortunately if someone is over 18 and mentally competent, there’s nothing they can do unless she herself admits what is happening. Or if the cops actually see it. I’ve been there before with a neighbor. Their kids told me that “he beats my mom and drags her around by her hair.” The cops said they can’t do anything because she’s not a child and isn’t the one calling for help or making these claims. It’s sad but until she takes the step to get out, they won’t do anything.
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Honestly calling the police isn’t going to do much- obviously. It’s going to make her defensive and claim nothing is wrong. Calling CPS will have the same effect, if not worse. (I was personally in this situation once, cops coming to my house daily only made the beatings worse and then we were evicted)
If you really want to help her, befriend her and offer support/recommend services. It’s very shameful and humiliating to admit it and ask for help escaping. Or she just may feel trapped and like no one cares about her.
Call for a wellness check maybe when the man is gone?? Does he have a car you can check for?
Start recording it. That way when the cops finally come you can show them what was happening to make you call so if it’s stopped when they get there. You have the evidence
WOW, this is absolutely a dangerous situation. Be as supportive as you can. Avoid this fella. He’s got some major issues.
If he is violent with her… he could be violent with you. Leave it to the cops. How does your husband feel about it? Or are you single?
If the cops never open the door for a domestic violence situation you have much bigger issue at hand
I would do a well being check up. That way they have to answer to the door and call while he’s beating on her.
I would suggest to meet with the mum and give her your phone number, and then agree on a Safe word/ saying only you and her know, like " I am so tired", or I’m going to make a coffee, anything that isn’t obvious, then you will know to call the police. I have been in this position before and if the situation is dangerous for her then you need to tread carefully and be descreat. Trust your instincts and take care xxx
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Keep calling police, keep listening
.contact DV organisations and ask for advice on how to approach her safely for her and you …
one great organisations on FB
Broken Crayons Still Colour Foundation
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Record it and keep calling police
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Best advice… mind your own business. Simple.
To each their own but no matter what you do to try and intervene with DV you end up being the primary problem when all you thought you did was look out for someone else.
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Man that’s tough. All you can do is continue to call 911 when you’re hearing her in danger
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You’re gonna have to stay in your lane. She will leave when she’s ready.
Record the kickoff by placing your phone on the floor. Have documented evidence that they cannot argue with. Your in s take if pregnancy where you need peace and safety. So be careful getting involved.
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Don’t call CPS! If you’re so worried, make friends with the mum and offer your actual support.
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Abuse never stops. Maybe you can give her a note next time you see her. She is embarrassed, I think, but if you tell her, you are there for her and her child, whenever she wants to flee from that man…i think it will help her. Abused women are locked in isolation…
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Mind your Business if she does want help just let her figure it out for herself.Its sad but time will tell.
A warning with her eyes? So “fuck me eyes” are a thing now. Sweet. Consent given to smash even when she’s non verbal
Sounds like me when I’m yelling at my kids. Mind your own business
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Call the cops immediately,you may save a life.
You could always try minding your own fucking business?
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Talk to her, organise a play date,& a coffee.
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Just keep doing what you’re doing.
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Well you will feel awful if something far worse happens. Call DSS and ask what to do. Gather information and perhaps mail anonymously, staple on nearby tree, slip under the door. Look for a woman’s shelter and ask for advice. The point is to keep the woman safe AND the child.
Unfortunately Women in these situations will not leave until they are ready or dead. The best thing you can do is what you are. Call the police… I would also complain to the front desk. If you see her alone offer assistance if she is ready but don’t get pulled into their BS. I have experienced this. They want to complain and pull you into drama but refuse to leave or leave and go back 2 days later. I know the helpless feeling but you can make anyone do anything.
Record the arguments. If possible
Stop calling and mind your business. If she wanted help she’d get it.
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As someone who went through this (without a child in the picture), I had someone call the police for me once. I was so thankful, but I was also too terrified of my abuser to tell the police he was hurting me when they came. But once they left he was too afraid he’d get in trouble (he thought they were watching the house), so he left me alone for a few days. I prayed someone would call every day after that just so he would leave me alone for the night. I’m so thankful for the few nights of peace. And so thankful to whoever called 
But every situation is different. I’ve seen comments where it made things worse for the abused 
I’m so sorry for all of the people who are going through this or who have ever had to go through it. I pray for all of you every single night
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The cops should be doing more. Your doing rhe right thing they aren’t doing their jobs. Typical.
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if you get a chance to speak to her, speak to her, Tell her you are sorry for everything thing she is going through, If she tells you to shut up, then walk away, but if she doesn’t & starts to cry or talks about it, get her the help, If not for her for her child. Take her to a safe place, If there is a women’s shelter somewhere close, take her, They will help her, If her husband is that controlling & she is too far into the abuse, she might not leave, You can move, you have called the police enough, your landlord/manager is well aware & that is a good reason to get another apt, No one should hear this at night or whenever
Dont call CPS, they dont help they’ll just take the child and tell her to figure her shit out. Make sure you have more concrete evidence other than “noise” before calling the police next time, it will make it worse for her of you dont have enough to get him in handcuffs
You are def doing the right thing! I wish I had a neighbor like you when I was going through a horri le relationship. I would start getting proof and def call CPS nc that environment is extremely toxic and not fair to that child
Record it next time and show the cops.
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As someone who lost her sister to domestic violence please keep calling them. I wish her neighbours did. They said they heard her yelling for help but figured they were just fighting again. Both her boys were in the apartment when he took her life. Please keep calling and never stop.
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Please don’t call CPS try to reach out to her personally like when you see her outside or when you know the man isn’t home start out with small talks and let her know if she needs something you’re upstairs then later on ask her if everything is ok and if she needs help
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As a domestic abuse survivor…keep calling. Sometimes we aren’t ready to leave sometimes we still think we can fix them, sometimes we are too scared to say anything. But eventually, eventually she maybe willing to speak up. There may come a time where she thinks to herself he’s going to kill me but if I scream loud enough my neighbors will call the police. Just keep calling. Some people are saying befriend her…and although I don’t disagree with that…if you try to do that and her husband finds out she may not be allowed out to the park at all. Abusers typically don’t allow friends. I would smile, wave and say good morning…if she initiates anything more follow her lead. Other than that keep calling.
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Call every time could save her life
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If you really believe there is abuse then call your local child services. It’s likely he is still abusing her even when u don’t hear a peep.
Maybe ask her for a play date at the park or playground with your children & you can give her your phone number on a piece of paper with a note that says you & hubs are there for her if needed plus the number of a domestic violence hotline. That way she knows she has an ally and the kids won’t overhear anything.
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Keep calling,eventually though if it is and it’s bad enough it won’t be you calling it’ll be their own son,I grew up in a home filled with abuse and it wasn’t til I was older that I was able to find the courage to call the law and made my mom tell the truth instead of lying like she always did when anyone else reported it . We grew up in a home where it was “what happens at home stays at home “ and that if we told anyone our “business” we would be in trouble and taken away which obviously immediately deterred us from ever speaking up bc we were scared to be taken from our parents bc we loved them so much and thought it was all normal . Eventually my mother went back to him and me and my sister were taken into custody when a domestic violence incident occurred in public Walmart between me and him
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Do not and I repeat do not call cps they will just take her baby cps doesn’t rly help anyone but themselves but call the police and record it …if she’s alone at all at any point ask if she’s ok
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Next time you hear it, you need to record the audio. And call the cops. Don’t stop calling the cops because one of those phone calls could save her life. But if they aren’t answering when the police knock thats definitely a huge red flag. If you haven’t seen the boy that much either, whats to say he’s not being abused himself, if he’s 2 he can’t speak up. I hate to be that person, but maybe a cps call is in order. You are the only person advocating for this woman, but I strongly suggest getting audio recordings. Its really hard because more times than not, a victim will protect their abuser and say nothing is going on even though she’s got bruises all over her. I also suggest maybe you should say something to her as well. You never know, you might be that one person she really needs to help her get away from this situation.
Honestly if she herself isn’t ready to leave there isn’t much you can do except what you are doing. Continue calling 911 and looking for an opportunity to talk to her. Maybe slip her the number of a domestic abuse hotline.
These situations are very tricky especially with a child involved. First even if he’s abusive you have to remember she loves him. It’s possible she still believes that he will change or she can change him. Most women who leave try leaving several times before they leave for good.
Second in abuse cases she really needs to have every detailed planned before she leaves. A emergency bag packed for when he is gone, half a signal set up for someone like you that would signal call 911 now. Have a place to go where he won’t find her or kid. That’s just for starters.
Third she needs to try and document some evidence that he’s abusive to her and a possible threat to their child. Sadly it is possible that if she leaves he could full or partial custody. This why some women don’t leave.
There is help for her out there but it’s not much help if she’s not ready to leave him.
Also keep in mind when she leaves the odds of him killing her go up as many abusers become more violent when the victim leaves. Many of them have that if I can’t have her no one can mentality. Do some research and tread carefully. The wrong move and this could go sideways fast.
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Could u knock on door when he leaves and slip her a note, does he go to school yet? Reach out if u can
Honestly…it is her decision to seek help or not. CPS is way too much. That little boy may be the only thing keeping her going. Taking him away is a bad idea. Keep calling the poloce when hear it getting bad and even revord it and try to reach out to her in small ways,but dont try to butt all the way in at once.
As someone who is going through domestic violence myself, word of advice do not get the police involved… they are mandated to get cps involves if a child is around and cps does NOT try to do what’s right for the child, they do whats right for the state… I’m battling a court case with them because my stepson TOLD THEM (not because they had actual avidence because it never happened, he’s a 5 year old pathological liar) that I “grabbed him by his arm” and they believe it so they are trying to say IM neglected the children in my home, meanwhile I’m the victim of abuse. The only way she is going to leave is if she WANTS to. Calling the law makes things worse and harder. Speak to her YOURSELF, when you get an opportunity. Give her the resources to get help IF SHE wants it. You can’t save everyone.
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Not your business. Stay out of it. You may be pushing her deeper into the abuse if it even is abuse. You don’t know the dynamic. She will get out if she wants out. Family members opinions won’t matter let alone a random neighbors opinion. Mind your business. I know you mean well but you may be causing more harm
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If there is a child involved, child protective services can do a more thorough investigation and she may need to comply.
Bring her a dish or something while her husband is away. Become close and then she will become comfortable enough to tell you. Maybe invite her to a bday party or to the park with the kids. If she has the same sex kids as the baby ask her if she has any small clothes that could fit the baby.
Mind your business. I’ve been in the situation and people not minding their business made my situation worse.
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Keep calling. I was in the situation and people “minded their business” and I never got help. Thankfully having a baby with him I finally got out. My daughter is what saved my life
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To those people telling her to mind her own business and do not call the cops YOU’RE WRONG! I grew up in it too and while it can make things worse sometimes it will also save her life! I’ve seen so many things a child should never have to see. The guy almost killed my mother several times! Keep calling! You’re doing right!
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I think you should mind your own business.
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Do not call CPS. You’re so unsure of the situation yet you’d put a mother in jeopardy when it comes to her children? Wrong* stay calling the police all you want but don’t drag cps into it
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One time I had a police enter my home because the lady across the street said she hear someone scream help. I was not home nor was my children or husband. They left a note with a police file after checking my home. No domestic violence at our house ever so I was pretty shocked
Definitely keep calling. You could call child services and went them know the mother is being abused. Most of the time if the mother is getting abused so is the child. Even if he isn’t, he’s still home to witness. Just don’t give up calling police.
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If you can’t take it then you move, I feel sorry for her but you can’t make her leave that’s up to her. You don’t know her situation.
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Contact your landlord to have a private meeting with the woman and see if that would be of help. Definitely keep calling 911 — DCF is a joke.
“Mind your own business” really ppl!!! That one phone call can save that woman life or that child!!! It’s ppl who mind their own business that when the victim is killed or the child that say I wish I would of done something!!! Every situation is different it that one phone call can save that person life that night! Try reaching out to the lady and keeping calling!!!
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Welfare check. My dad did that when I was going through DV with my now ex husband cause he took my phone when I was talking to my parents and wouldn’t give it back screaming at me, If he didn’t who knows where I’d be.
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Keep calling the cops! Thats what helped me get out of my dv relationship. He finally did it in public while I was driving so I stopped car right in middle of a main street and everyone around called the cops. I was still scared to say he was hitting me so I lied for him said he didn’t but there was too many witnesses calling in. Plus marks on my face I didn’t let cops takes pics but it was still in report. DA picked up charges and issued restraining order. (Even though all he had to do was agree to take classes and they let him out of jail, it was still my way out. With a restraining ordered he was scared one day I’d call the cops or someone else would. If he violated he would go to jail a year so they say)
Besides calling the cops try to be friends with her. Maybe see if she wants to have playdates and get closer to her like that. Once you become a bit closer to her maybe let her know if she ever needed anything she is welcomed to go to your apt anytime. Don’t bring up what you hear or anything about the dv cause you may make her shut you out if she’s not ready to tell anyone or get out the situation. I would never tell anyone what I was going through cause he would threatened me.
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Call the cops every time. Please.
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This is a tough situation. Shes probably trauma bonded. But a child is involved so keep calling and possibly do a welfare check even if it’s for the child.
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As a DA survivor. Keep calling. When you see her, keep smiling and greet her. Invite You get so beat down physically and mentally during this abuse, You feel alone and isolated, you lose track of not only yourself, but the fact that there are people out there who care and can help. Sometimes it takes one small act of caring and kindness, to give us hope and remind us we do have strength in there somewhere.
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You don’t call CPS unless u see that child being hurt. Stop calling the police
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Everybody telling her to mind her own business!!! Then when hubby kills her and the child then what? You guys all be saying why didn’t anyone help them!!
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As someone who works for an apartment community I can tell you the landlord cannot give you any of her personal information or set up a meeting with her. We do tell all residents who think they are witnessing/hearing DV to never stop calling. Our community cannot evict until there is a felony charge. I’m not sure about the one you live in. Hopefully it’s not & ir all works out!
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Never give up on her. As a serviver of domestic violence I wish my neighbors would have called the cops when they heard me screaming but they didn’t. My phone was taken away from me so I couldn’t. One of those calls will help her one day. My son has seen so much he shouldn’t have seen and had to go through so much therapy to help him deal with it. Keep calling
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Write her a note and slip it to her next time you all at the park “If you need help write your number” give her your number.
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Keep calling cops. Record if you can. Tell apt manager. Other than that not much 
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Start a friendship with her. If you’re at the park you don’t need to bring up her troubles just be a friend she can come to if needed.
My sister is in a dv situation. Even when we would step in she still wouldn’t leave. It’s got to be their own decision to leave
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Finally a worthy post. Bless you for not trying to rip a child away from his mother but trying to help and being extremely genuine
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You need to mind your own business
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With the son in the home you can also call cps or human services. Keep calling. You can also make reports on what you hear. Find your local domestic violence agency and see if they have information or a brochure or business card. If you can leave it with her safely at any point you can. I work for a domestic violence agency and the statistics of escalation and homicide, once it has reached physical violence is huge. Don’t give up.
Having been on the other end of this situation before, please keep calling the cops! My neighbor came and sat on top of my ex-husband after months of hearing me scream, he was an angel in disguise.
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Become her friend. She probably needs one. Maybe you can encourage her.
When it comes to children, it should be your business. Make it your business! Poor kid shouldn’t have to live with screaming and fighting. I used to live in a complex as well and I’ve had to call cops heaps of times. The dv and child neglect was unbelievable there.
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As a DV survivor myself, keep calling. When you see her, say hi. Try to be her friend. She is isolated and scared and starved for human interaction. You may just be the only person to show her kindness all day. You’re a lovely person for trying to help. 
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Maybe just try and go talk to her yourself. When he leaves for work go down there. Ask if the kids wanna play. Invite them over or go to there place and TALK TO HER. Let her know your concerns and that you want to help.
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She’s going to make that decision when she’s ready to leave the situation, but if it sounds bad enough to where you are worrying for the child then call Cps. Yes everyone is going to be upset but the child needs some type of mental stability, comfort, the right learning type of environment. He needs a better situation all around. I feel bad for her but do I care? Nah simply because she knows what’s going on ain’t right and she knows her son shouldn’t be growing up around that sh*t! We are in 2021 the resources are put right in our faces even if we don’t need them. Was in a dv relationship until I had a kid because around who’s kid not mine?!!! Get your kids in a better situation as a mother not only thinking about herself should think. If not then okay this case worker will help your kid out bc it ain’t about her it’s about that baby. CALL.
There’s unfortunately nothing you can really do about the mother. Domestic violence is tragic, but even with police involvement, it won’t end until she’s ready. Even if her partner gets arrested, they’ll be back with her as soon as they’re out, which will likely not be long if she isn’t willing to testify against them. A domestic violence victim has to make the choice to be a survivor, to leave and the save themselves. Offer her support, try and talk to her when you see her again so she knows she has someone nearby that is willing to help when she’s ready. As for the child, call CPS. They don’t care whether Mom is ready or not, they’ll protect that little boy. Hopefully, the risk of losing him will motivate Mom to leave.
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Start recording and playing it back for social service and the police
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I would go down there next time I hear something and say something about it through the door. Who cares if they know you’ve been calling the cops he should know that his big secret isn’t a secret anymore
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As a domestic violence survivor keep calling every time you here! They threaten you as soon as that car shows up not to say anything but eventually after so many calls they will do something or there will be marks. Abusers are smart and don’t usually do it where everyone if going to see! My face never got a mark but my arms, legs, stomach, back, the back of my head where my hair could cover it… those are the places they go for where you can cover them up. I stayed in a VERY abusive relationship for 5 years to long because I was scared to get out and what he would do when I left… it was bad when I first left but it does get better.
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I was in dv when I was pregnant it took a lot to be convinced I didn’t have to stay that it would be better to leave but safv task force helped me so much idk if they are everywhere but give them a call
You can tell the landlord ar apt manager. They can open the door… I’d say follow your gut instinct.
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So, you hear them fighting a lot. And the woman yells, “get off of me”. But she is not yelling help! The cops show up and no answer. And when they did answer, the woman didn’t say anything? I’ve known people who fight daily. But still want to be together. Unless she is actually yelling for help. Or you know for sure someone is being hurt, leave it alone. Don’t call CPS! Unless you know for sure something bad is actually happening! CPS will take the wrong child for no reason. And that child could end up in foster care, really being abused! Sometimes you just have to mind your own business. Everyone has a different relationship. But from what you’ve explained, it doesn’t sound like she is in immediate danger. Maybe he is trying to hug her and she yells, get off of me. Some women are like that. As far as slamming doors, my teenagers do that daily! No one calls the cops. If you are fed up, then look to move. Since you don’t want to contact the landlord. Contacting the landlord would make more sense than calling the cops or CPS. The landlord can actually contact them and go in the apartment.
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Keep calling the cops. maybe not CPS though, if the cops feel as though there’s a reason for them to be involved they’ll call them. That may just anger her man more and he may take it out on her. But just know that no matter how much you are trying to help and it really is a lovely intent you have, it may not end the way you’d like for them to.
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Ignore these people saying mind your item business. I had a neighbor below me who beat her kids. I called the cops, DHS, the landlord… I didn’t let up. I eventually moved, and at that time nothing had been done, but I later found out she was busted dealing drugs and her kis were taken away for good. They ended up with their aunt.
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Next time you call report the domestic and tell them you want a wellness check as it’s been going on for quite some time . They will not leave that door until they answer . Also the continuous domestic calls will lead to CPS coming in eventually I’d be surprised if they weren’t trying to get ahold of her . One day they will just show up for an investigation and that will be the day nothing will be hidden any longer . Trust you me. I went through it .
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Instead of calling cops and cps try becoming her friend she might just need to know that when she decides to run she has some support.
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