What would you do if you had family that NEVER visited your child: their grandchild/niece/nephew? You’ve reached out, made the invitation open to visit( with notice), and yet the family still does not. Should you continue being the only one that makes an effort?
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I’ve been doing this for three years and I stopped . I’m done making all the effort .
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Nope!! It’s their loss. Don’t stress it love.
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Stop reaching out and cut ties with them. When they ask why tell them you tried over and over again to reach out and they were not interested so they can stay that way.
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Not at all! I stopped years ago, those who really care will make an effort
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Story of my life. Just keep living yalls life. Thry wanna come around they know where yall live
Just stop. My husbands family is like this.
I live it everyday. The best thing to do is learn from it and not let ur grandchildren go thru it
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My dad refuses to meet my kids. I’ve given up
They are responsible for the relationship they have with your child, not you.
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You finally let it go. My brother lives about 15 blocks away from me and I haven’t seen him in like 12 years. His wife keeps him away from us
I stopped reaching out and lost nearly everyone. And now according to all of them its my fault. But oh well
Nope don’t waste your time! My oldest father’s side and father hasn’t seen her in two years, their choice I tried and tried and tired and nothing came out of it but a sad little girl crying at the window, I now have a husband that loves her and spends all his time with her and she sees him as daddy, and his family as Nana,papa and aunts and uncles, don’t torture your child by trying to have them in her life
I wouldnt make the effort its taking you to keep your child in contact. Its their loss. Plus it could get worse as your child grows and could cause a negative impact on your baby. Protect your childs heart at all costs!
Leave them alone don’t waste your time
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If you are the daughter i suggest u make time to take them to your parents …u know parents get old andnthier bodies aren’t the same they have pain that they don’t tell us about so we don’t worry …they can’t drive or if they do its to where they go and back …believe me I learned the hard way
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Hell no nope their kids not yours
You’ve made the effort, just let it go and go on with your life, if they want to see the child they will make the effort( I’ve been there)
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My father has never met my 3yr son. He only met my 9yr old daughter once. I’m over it. If he wanted to, he would have. They appreciate the 2x per year checks he sends them and that’s it. 
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Nope give up. Fuck em.
Dont even bother. Its ridiculous but we went through it as well and they always expected us to drop everything and travel with 3 kids, yet could never do the same.
We’ve got a semi big family, multiple cousins and aunts and uncles on my moms side let alone. And the only people I can ever get to come to my sons parties are my mother, my great aunt that is basically my babysitter, and my grandmother. Possibly another aunt. That’s it, and I’d invite a good 30+ people and half of them had kids. I feel super bad my kids haven’t had any friends at their parties or don’t even get play dates
If they don’t make the effort why stress yourself over it? My husband and I agreed that if that relative is not here for the long run then we don’t want them around our kids. Basically I don’t have a father who was involved after my parents divorced. My son knows my mom’s partner as his grandfather and he loves my son as his grandchild. I want my son to know stability and know family he can count on. He knows he is deeply loved and that’s not something I ever want him questioning if he’s good enough for relatives or why they don’t want to spend time with him.
Hell no its their loss
Nope! Over half my husband’s family won’t come see our son! I know they hate me but they’re the ones losing out on an amazing baby.
Why stress over it? Their loss not yours or your child’s. My daughters father always says he will come to see her never does I don’t care though and I don’t bother him because he will regret it not me not anyone else .
Move on with your life and be happy, I’m sure your family know that they’re more than welcome to come and more than welcome to leave.
I’d quit extending invitations.
Don’t stress about yes. But does not hurt to reach outstill
This post again!!! Anyhow,maybe you are the lroblem…check yourself,your attitude ,your hospitality!
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Move on…period…no one has to like you, your kids, spend time with you, family or not…you tried…it failed…move on…their loss not yours
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you’ve tired, but they’re making it clear they want nothing to do with your child so i’d let it go and not contact them again
Keep your child away
Quit making the effort if it doesnt go both ways
My ex in laws had their opportunity. They don’t make any effort. So I’m done putting effort in.
I want my kids to learn not to cross oceans for people who wouldn’t even step over a puddle for them
Quit reposting everything
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Stop trying & move on
Forget the invites. If they really wanted to see the child they would make the effort
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Being a mother is a selfless job. KNOW that your children see and follow by YOUR example. Always be the gracious person and have an open invitation to the family. Know that by never shutting the door, that you are leaving it open for Love to peak it’s way through. Know that the invitation MIGHT FEEL dormant but you are taking the high road and showing your children how much class , respect and LOVE you have for them AND FOR YOURSELF. Be their light and show them how a women holds their head up high. You will be showing them am intimate piece of yourself and how to be ‘The Better Person.’ Because they haven’t come over, you might feel ‘why bother’. You’re not doing this for yourself, your doing this for your children and examples last a life time.
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I would not continue to waste my time.
I use to invite my family all the time to events that I put on for my kids and they would always make excuses and then never invite my kids to their events… I just stopped trying…
If they dont want to be in your childs life why force them? Let them go your child will see who’s there when they grow up.
Quit sending invontations!
If they wanted to see you or the child they would make an effort!
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Nope. Relationships work both ways. Our family is huge but… Our own family is 6.
Thats who we rely on. My children have been acknowledged maybe half a dozen times by their grandparents fathers side… They’re 13, 8 and 7 this year.
We have built our family on choice and loyalty and its not all blood. We’ve found blood is the first to crucify you…
Nobody comes to see mine. Oh well they got me.
Nope. I gave up with my “brothers” meeting my daughter. 
Let it go. Ain’t worth the heartache. Mine doesnt even ask anymore.
Their silence is ur answer. Roll on and enjoy life.
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Just go about your life, when they are ready they will make an effort. If they don’t, that’s their loss.
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Don’t bother with them. Your life is probably better without them anyways.
Definitely just give up, at least u tried. They will b the ones who regret it in the long run. No need to stress about it
Let it alone why beg its not your responsibility if it was that important trust me they would have found ways to visit
Nope gave up years ago when babys were 2 and 1… 9 years ago… never seen them since never a card txt nothing… much more peaceful in life now too
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Absolutely not! The invite is out there, the ball is now in their court
Yeah I tried. Half of my family doesn’t even invite me to parties that they have. And send my son presents through the mail even though they only live a half hour away.
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Leave it alone. You opened the door and if they don’t want to come in, it’s their loss.
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No your hurting yourself & your child. Your teaching your child through example to wait for life to happen instead of living life daily. I go through this as well. Its hurts terribly & if i focus on that it becomes quite hurtful.
Go live life daily & stop waiting for them to notice.
Youll be happier I promise.
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Don’t dwell if those members aren’t in your child’s life. Whoever chooses to be there are all that matters.
My in laws don’t see my kids. But my family spends enough time with us that we don’t even care anymore.
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No ma’am it’s their loss. You can only put yourself out so many times and go thru the hurt and rejection over and over again that apparently your child is not important and not a priority for them. I completely know how you feel and when you can let it go ,you’ll be so much more happier. It’s their loss. And I’m so sorry
Family is family.
They only time you cut them off is if they are toxic.
They have their own lives too, if they visit they visit if they don’t they don’t, doesn’t mean they don’t love or care about the kids.
I stopped making an effort. My children are young enough to forget they ever existed, and I prefer it that way. It breaks my heart to hear them ask about family that hasn’t bothered to see them in over a year, when we have tried. Save the children the heartache and cut ties.
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No answer is an answer. I only see most of my family on holidays, that includes my siblings… I invite sometimes and they usually don’t make it…that’s okay they’re busy and so am I. I don’t hold it against them.
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Alot of family cant stay sober long enough to visit.
Have this problem with my MIL. Our 2nd child is 8 months old. She has never met him and only lives 10 minutes away. But is always with her other grandchildren. So sad hate it when families have favorites and show it 
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What are your expectations and how are they not being met?
Just let it roll off your back & continue with life.
My FIL was actually in town (lives 24 hours away) the day my son was born. Left town that morning while in was in the hospital in labor to do some sightseeing & then left to go home. My son is almost 3 & has still never met his grandpa since we dont have the funds to travel to see him.
My son’s have not seen anyone from their paternal side in over a year because I stopped asking them.
I let everyone know that they only needed to call or text me to let me know they wanted to come over, so I would be able to be home or to tell them not to waste the gas if I had plans that day that I couldn’t change. And none have taken me up on it. I do everything for my boys, they are well loved and cared for.
It is the other adults responsiblity to keep a relationship with my boys if they wanted it. They don’t want to call to check up on them or to see if they can come visit it is on them.
I never have and never will force a relationship for my daughter with family. She has only see her grandfather on her dad’s side about 4 times and she is 3. The sad part is that he is neighbors with her babysitter 
it’s no one’s loss but his.
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Nope. After so many times I quit. My son is 18 months old and I have “family” whose still never seen him or seen him once.
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Nope. Let it go and enjoy your little family and the family that does come around. Its better company anyways😁
Keep living! Build up your own family starting from your immediate family outward and emphasize principles like importance of family structure and relationship building and support. It could be as simple as a consistent dinner gathering at an agreed time regularly. Continue to invite and add to your gatherings as those who are willing to avail themselves show up. Start simple, no expectations just invite as you are led and do so with Love and an open heart.
The greatest gift is family. With so many distractions and obligations today it truly is easy to overlook such an opportunity but never the less, You are a treasure to be the one to desire to bring together your family in this way. This is such a gift:orange_heart:
My father is this way.
He’s seen my kids a handful of times. Never has actually had them stay over since they’ve been born. Never spent more than 2 hours with them ever. He lives down the road!
My oldest is 6 and she’s never once had a sleep over at grandpas house!
I understand adults are busy with work and things like that, but he never even calls or asks how they are either.
I’ve never not let my kids see and talk to him. They know who he is but they see him 1 or maybe 2 times a year. Something always comes up and they need to leave or whatever it may be. So I’ve just let things be as they are. 
Nope. They will come around when they want. No reason to force it and let yourself down.
No! And I’ve stopped doing so! It’s too far doe anyone to come to us but everyone expects me to pack him and all his stuff up to go the same distance to them at the drop of a dime. It also pisses me off when they comment on pictures “that’s my boy” etc when they haven’t even came to see, text, called, etc in months. Like, he’s not your anything.
My family never visits my kids. My kids only know my parents and my sister and her kids (whom they hardly see)
None of my family go out of their way to visit my son except for his grandparents and one great aunty. My brother hasn’t seen his nephew in almost two years and only sees him on face time for a few seconds at Christmas if that. We aren’t close and have nothing to do with each other but I’ll never say no if he does decide to come around .
Id write them off, my youngest her dad’s family doesn’t call, text, ask to see her, he doesn’t ask to see her, he refuses child support has even switched jobs to avoid being put on orders, i tried so hard for over a year to involve them. Now that she’s 2 I said to hell with it. They can see her when they get visitation rights. I don’t believe people should just pop in and out a child’s life except extended family that are like holiday goers. Grandparents, aunts, uncles, should be involved more than once a year.
I would stop trying to make the effort and just go on without them because if their not interested then they had their chance and now its gone.
Don’t worry about people that don’t worry about you!!! Don’t sacrifice your mental sanity worrying about people like that, they are missing out not you!
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WRITE THEM OFF. Love the ones who love you. Do NOT give up your sanity for the ones who are missing out. Do not let their guilt, trip you!!
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My daughter’s grandpa refuses to see her all because I don’t want her in his smoke infested house. I’ve invited him over many times, I’ve tried compromising and bringing her over to his house to hangout outside and he wouldn’t even look at her… So he’s not allowed in her life.
If they don’t make an effort to see your kid, then they don’t have to be apart of their life.
Is your house nasty?
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F**k them. Their loss 100%
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No. I tried for over a year, new baby, only seen him once, my baby will be 3… Never have I met my husband sister, brother in law, their kids, or his brother.
Only met his mom and step dad three times.
I would send pictures, cards, etc, never got anything in return. I washed my hands with all of them.
I had that with my son dad he always had an excuse to why he couldn’t take my son
I live in ohio and most my grandpa grandma mom side lives in new jersey and rest are all over the united states nobody has met my kids since lived here for 9 years. My mom cousin and friend of there came to my wedding in 2018 the rest didnt come but there are close ones that i am with that couldnt come due to work but they sent us something in mail so those are ones i mailed pictures of my kids that came and that talks to them over phone. The rest of them can go f off. But my suggestion is if they dont talk or visit then i wont even bother but everyone has own oppions and suggestions 
I deal with this first hand and have given up. My husband is always so annoyed and makes statements like “your family could contribute and watch our son for a little bit”. His mom babysits for us throughout the week so we don’t ask more of her. He feels my family should help and I should force them…I just apologize and tell him sorry they didn’t wanna be around
I decided before I ever got pregnant, from things I’ve seen and how it effected me and others, that I would NEVER force ANYONE to be in my kids life. I don’t care WHO they are, her father(he is in her life tho) or anyone. They don’t make an effort they aint in my kid or mines lives period. A forced relationship is just that: forced, it’s not genuine and that back fires at some point. Kids know who is real and who ain’t.
Good luck with whatever you do:two_hearts:
I would still make an effort.
But dammed if you do, damned if you dont.
If we had family like this, I would’ve invited once and then went on with our lives. Too busy to worry about family that does not behave as such.
Nope. I have that same exact problem. Im tired of having to reach out for them to come over or meet up or something. If they want to see my son they know where he lives and they have my number. My husband’s dad’s side has only seen him once and he is 4 months.
This happened to me. My father hadn’t seen my baby more than 3 times in a year and a half. I stopped trying to make an effort. Here’s where things changed though. I was really mad at my dad for not making an effort and then he passed away. Although I stand by my choice I do wish I would have gotten past my own feelings as we never got a photo with them together and it is one of my biggest regrets. You have to do what’s best for you and your family, but I wish I had gone out of my way to try and make more memories before I couldn’t anymore. Wish you the best 
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Nope! Could care less. My Inlaws treat their other grandchildren like grandchildren. Mine, not so much. We ask them to help out once in awhile, but there’s ALWAYS an excuse. But then they’re always with thier other grandkids. So we eventually stopped inviting them over for Birthday parties, xmas dinners, stop contacting them. If they don’t/won’t make an effort why should we.! 
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Dont make an effort. They obviously dont care. Most of my family has never even met my 15 month old daughter, and never even saw me while pregnant. Blood isnt everything, dont stress over it. Your child will know who was there and who loved them.
Move on and focus on the ones who are involved without the effort!
I know exactly how that is… you just have to leave it alone as hard as it is wanting your baby to be loved by them. Can’t force people to come around:woman_shrugging:. Its hard to finally let go and let it be what it is but just surround yourself with those who love to be around you and your child
I wouldnt sweat it. If youve tried and no response then its not your fault
Nope, it will only eat at you if you continue to reach out to them and get nothing in return.
It’s a 2 way street, do you visit them or expect them to come to you, maybe visit them first then if they dont return the visit stop making the effort
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Can I get some advice on the opposite? The family with the kids are separate from all the rest of the family (4hrs away) yet they don’t make the invites or attempt to see us… ?