What's the Best Way to Prepare Your Child for Bullies?

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"A couple kids that used to be my sons best friends (1st grade) have began ganging up on him. Chasing him & pushing him, making him get hurt, every recess. My kiddo is the soft, sweet, gentle, kindest kid I’ve ever seen. He is completely heartbroken and his feelings are so hurt. The school has become fully involved now, but as we all know, we’ll always have people like this in our lives. So, how do you prepare your kid for how to handle bullies? For a kid that takes everything to heart. Motherhood ain’t for the weak, y’all"

RELATED: Tori Spelling Recalls How Teen Daughter Stella Grappled With Bullying At School: ‘It Was So Painful’


The following top answers have been selected by a moderator from hundreds of responses to the original question.

"When my L/O is old enough her daddy is going to tech her how to defend herself. But, she’s gonna know not to be a bully."

"Karate class. Boxing. Self defense classes. Look into it. Before it’s too late. I was bullied. I still don’t understand how my parents knew and still forced me to go to school. Even the teachers abused me. Show him you care. Teach him how to fight or homeschool him."

"Put your child in a self defense class. Also let him know that regardless of what the school says, he can protect himself without getting in trouble with you. My kids will not be Punching bags. I tell my kids never hit first, but always defend themselves."

"Taught my girls they are allowed to stand up for themselves however they wish as long as they didn’t start it."

"Yes prepare him and support him but make the parents and school responsible to stop it. Bullying is devastating. In my day it wasn’t recognized as a problem - just normal kid behavior. I was abused by an adult neighbor. I ate - I guess- and got fat. I was always harassed - even a tack on my chair to see if I would deflate. mean comments in my yearbook."

"You can’t. It’s heartbreaking, but tell him their behavior says everything about THEM and nothing about him. Give him a safe space to be himself. Foster relationships that allow that. This group are not his friends. Acknowledge that he has a hard path to find new friends. Celebrate who he is. He doesn’t have to fit into the popular mold, he may not always be on the kickball team, but he will find his people."

"that’s when I put my son in Taekwando class. He ended up using this skill to defend himself one day!!! the kid never messed with him again"

"Tell him to talk to the teachers at recess and then of the kids don’t stop, teach him to fight back. I’m not going to allow other kids to just beat on my kid if grownups won’t intervene. Always try to get a grownups help first, but if not defend yourself"

"After my 12 year old daughter, now 16, was physically assaulted by a boy sent to the ER and in a c-collar she finally took my advice. The school did nothing other than pay for the medical bills. A week later, she finally defended herself and broke the boy’s nose after he had a handful of her hair. The principal said “he has a crush on her”……my ass!!! She’s my oldest and the other 2 have also defended themselves. I give them a high five in front of the principal when I have to pick them up. We’re going on 2 years with no issues for any of the kids. Teach them to defend themselves!!! They are never able to throw the first punch, but always able to finish it!"

"I always had a natural talent of how to diffuse hostile situations and taught myself self control. My mom always said to not start a fight but finish it. So if it got to that point that person got rocked enough to not get seriously hurt but enough to never mess with me again. With my older sister I taught her how to fight and throw a good punch. She got me in the nose pretty good when practicing but I was proud of her."

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