When should girls brush their own hair?

If you could ask at what age is it appropriate for little girls to brush their own hair. My daughters are 8/9 almost 10 and theu dont do their own hair. Their mimi doesnt think they should. *they have curly hair


Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. When should girls brush their own hair?

My mom brushed my hair until I was around 12 lol my oldest is 7 and I still brush her hair

I am 35, and I don’t brush my hair. I just use my fingers.

My daughter is 13 with very thick coarse hair and I help her get the tangles out still sometimes

I brushed my own in 2nd grade. :woman_shrugging:t3:

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My eldest is almost 7, I will ask her to brush her hair and I’ll give her about 10-20 minutes as her hair is super long then I’ll go over it and put her hair up for her…
Being a hairdresser by trade I believe teaching my daughter to look after her hair is important


Women in general all need help with there for there whole life. Very few girls master doing great hair. If I were you I would do her hair until she feels a curtain way in school about her hair. Curly hair is not easy. Teaching while doing is important. Good luck

Really depends. “Curly” doesn’t explain it all. Some curly hair shouldn’t be brushed at all, but combed. If it’s simple enough hair type and they’re able to do it, there’s no reason they shouldn’t be. Some hair textures need more guidance and practice with an adult

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im 28 and dint brush my hair. rarely. just finger brush in the shower.

My son is 9 long hair and he’s just starting to brush it in the shower then I style it after sometimes I just brush it if he takes too long :sweat_smile:

Yes they are for sure old enough. They should do the bulk of it and you finish to make sure it’s done right. That way they are learning too.

They should be learning by 8. They have the motor skills at that point. By 10, they should be able to do it themselves. They might need help with styling, but brushing should be a given.

My 9 soon to 10 yr old prefers to brush her own hair but never fully gets the job done right so I still have to help… Her hair if very long and thick with a wavy curl so a bit to manage…

As soon as they’re able to hold a brush and grasp the concept…the more they can do for themselves the better off they are.

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I’m teaching mine skills as much as possible, she is almost 3. I have her take her turn to brush a little and when she’s ready I take over. Some days she asks me to go first, then she goes. (Usually when she has a rough time with tangles, her hair is also curly).

My daughter has really curly hair. She’s only 5, but I don’t see me letting her do her own hair until at least 12-13. I want to instill a very good sense routine of how to properly take care of her hair to not ruin her curls.

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Never to early for them to do it

My daughter is 16 with curly hair and still doesn’t brush her own hair lol She turns 17 in 3 months lol

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My daughter’s hair is very wavy and thick and I always have her brush it herself but I go over it after and get any tangles that she missed. She just turned 9

Curly hair shouldn’t be brushed dry and is much harder to take care of

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My 5 year old brushes her own hair. Sometimes she lets me help. Sometimes she asks me to fix it, and I always do when she asks. But shes been capable of brushing it herself for a while now.

I have a curly haired daughter (8) as well…we only brush her hair after she washes it. 2 to 3 times a week. My other daughter (7) with straight hair brushes hers every night. I style them in the morning but at night time the definitely do it themselves

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My daughter brushes her own hair. And washes it. BUT I do a thorough wash and deep condition twice a week. As well as usually brushing it once a day. I am the one who puts her hair up in a ponytail or braids it. She is 8. (I am a Cosmetologist and want to make sure her hair stays in good shape.)

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My daughter is 10 and has been brushing/doing her own hair for about a year,sometimes she will ask me to help her brush her hair at the back as her hair is quite long

I feel this!!! I just keep reminding myself that one day ill wish i could brush their hair :broken_heart::purple_heart:

How curly is curly? My curly haired sisters used a hair pick instead of a brush when it’s wet with detangler.

My 2 girls were washing their own hair, and combing/brushing it out by 8 or 9. They went to Girl Scout camp at 10 and were taking care of their own hygiene by then.

My 3 year old brushes his own hair that’s long and curly. He likes to and I do help. I think it just depends the kid. Hell I made my mom do everything for years :rofl:

My son is 15 i still help him with his hair because he has a lot of it lol…and hes my baby i like doing it

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Teaching self-care is important, in many ways.

My seven year old brushes her own hair but we help with braids and ponytails.

Depends on their hair type and length. Start taking time out to teach them how to take care of their hair.

Perhaps you should start teaching them how to do their own hair, so they can learn. And in the process just help them, it is tiring to be doing a child’s hair all the time, if u don’t teach them they won’t learn. I did my own hair 100% at 9, but I have sleek hair. So it was easy for me, I understand that it would probably take abit longer for ur girls. Good luck mommy

How curly is curly? Like what degree of curls and texture?

My daughter Kelly was in high school and I always untangled and blow-dried her hair! :woman_shrugging:t2:

Mine is 7. Does her own hair. It’s curly

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I actually had super long hair growing up got it trimmed every 6 weeks so it was hard for me to get the tangled out, my mom was sick a lot when I was growing up so my dad helped comb the knots out of my hair and would help me in the morning with brushing bc I couldn’t reach and or couldn’t figure out a logical way to brush my own hair at age 9.:joy: by time I was 11 or 12 I was finally able to get it all figured out and was also allowed to cut my hair a little shorter so I could brush it on my own. I then taught myself how to French braid my hair​:joy:

There’s no “age” … If they need help that’s fine ***especially if it’s curly, thick or otherwise “high maintenance” … Mimi had her time as mom - this time is yours :woman_shrugging:t3::tipping_hand_woman:t3:


I still do my daughter’s hair . Lol I’m going to do it for as long as she wants . It’s curly

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Curly hair can be a lot. Helping them is great. I know grown women who still can’t manage their natural hair

That is absolutely thr age when girls should be able to brush their own hair. I have a 9yo who struggles to brush her hair and put it in a pony. She is being set up with OT to work on it.

I loved brushing my kids hair! When they reached a point and said mom I can do it I let them! My 3 are grown and Married and I still brush theirs sometimes if they ask!

I think 8/9 is a good age for them to start learning.
Maybe you could do it on school days and on the weekends they can do it

My girl is 7 and I brush and do her hair as it’s up to her bum . Don’t see nothing wrong with that

I’ll put it this way, I have curly hair, my mom or aunt did my hair until I was a teen. I was never taught how to care for my hair properly so now it kinda does its own thing and I hate it.

My daughter nearly 22 now started brushing n washing her hair whn she was 5 i was still tieing it 4 her till bout 7 thn she did it all herself

My daughter is 7 and I still brush her hair…she doesn’t try to get the back when I’ve told her she’s big enough to brush it. But saying that, hers is pin straight. Doesn’t even hold a wave after wearing a French braid for over 24 hours with hair product in it to help. I think curly would definitely be harder to manage…

My five year old brushes her own hair. I of course check to make sure it’s good and then style it for her


My 3 year old brushes her hair well at least tries but after she’s done I go back through it

‘Mimi’ sounds LAZY…Learn how to manage your child’s curly locks before they get tangled up and have to be cut out…Do her hair until she’s old enough to handle the maintenance curly girls require…


I make a point to buy a good leave in spray. That I spray in my 5 yr olds curly hair. She brushes, and I go over it.

Just like brushing their teeth you let them try and then go over it.


I just argued with my nearly 5 year old today that she should be brushing her own hair, because she’s fully capable but doesn’t like it…
She does have thick, wavy, butt length hair. I know curly is tough, and they definitely may still need your help, but they should absolutely be able to manage the basics on their own

Not curly, but super thick and long

My step daughter is 8. She’s been brushing her own hair for a couple of years. Started putting it up in a low ponytail herself last year. 2 pony tails this year.

Her mum , dad and i put her up for school and when we go out so it’s neater.

Mine been brushing own hair since they been about 6 or 7

Just don’t ask pedijoe

My daughter has been brushing her own hair since she was 5. She is 10 now. I only help if she has tangles that are too hard for her to get out.

I would have them brush it after you do to start. Take them to the dollarama and let them pick their brush. Well the color anyway. Then let them start when wet after a bath with their own brush when it’s not a mess. Teach them to start at the bottom by splitting it in two piles on either side of their neck like ponys and tell them to slowly work their way up the hair.
You’ll have to finish it or start it at the beginning. However if you take over everytime they get frustrated they will just get lazy and you’ll be doing yourself.
At 9 my dad gave me a braid book and said I had the summer to learn to do my hair or I was getting a bob (1989). So I learned real fast as the bobs then were horrible.
Good luck. You got this.
You can get little clips etc for them to use. Headbands. It’s fun so make it fun.

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My oldest is 14 and would prefer to wear a hat than brush and style her hair.
My middle is 3 and loves to try.
Depends on the kid :woman_shrugging:

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My 16 yr old daughter( Caucasian-straight-thick-past her bum hair) washes her hair on her own and brushes/styles it herself since she was 9/10… Up until she could show me she could properly do it I would brush it once a day, then it went to once a week and so on… I only brush, or style, it now when she asks which is few and far between but I enjoy it every time

They need to be taught to take care of themselves. I was cooking, cleaning and doing my own hair at that age.

I’m assuming you mean just general hair care and not actual brushing for curly hair. They’re def old enough. Mimi doesn’t get a say. At their age if they aren’t willing to put in the effort then I’d suggest a discussion on cutting it shorter. They need wide tooth combs to comb conditioner through in the shower, no rubbing it dry, silk caps/pillowcases. Sounds like Mimi might be trying to stunt their growth as people so they can rely on her like babies.

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I still have to brush my 9 year olds after she does it :thinking: idk if that usual or not

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My youngest has very tight curls, and it’s hard to manage. I did as well, and my Mom did too, but I didn’t learn how to manage my hair until recent years. I’ll probably be doing my 5 year olds hair for a long time, and teaching her things. As for my 13 year old who was blessed with perfectly staight soft hair i still do hers as well from time to time. My Mother wouldn’t tell me other wise, and if she did thats too damn bad. I’m their Mother. We do it out of love, and there’s nothing malicious about it.

I wish I could still brush my 12 year Olds hair and my 5 year old will go to the bathroom to get the hairbrush for me to do her hair and come back with a ponytail and so proud of it.

My 8.5yr old has been brushing her hair for quite a while… my 4 yr old also does. If it doesnt look “good enough” i go over it again. What better way to learn than to do it yourself💁‍♀️

My daughter is 9 she been doing her own her for a couple of years now

My 4 year old has really long curly hair and he brushes his own. Has been since the age of 3.

My daughters four and she trys to brush her hair but I always take the brush from her and brush it my self then do a hair do of some sort I also put bows in her hair I’m not sure what age sorry I’m not of any help

We have curly, curly hair and im white, my 2 daughters have my curly hair PLUS their dads African American curly hair. So. Its constant tangles and brushing and grease, that being said; they started at 5 learning to brush it out and how to handle it. Unfortunately i was “rough” so they started on their own with me helping and products. OILS, GREASE, WATER, and BONNETS are essential for curly heads. I dont use a brush for myself, i pick it out so it doesnt rip curls! Best of luck. It will come to them once basics are learned!

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My daughter started brushing her hair daily young but I always made sure it was fine correctly until she was about 7

I wish my mom would’ve brushed my hair longer than she did.

I have a 9 year old curly girl and i think I may be serving another 5 years🤣

My 12 still needs help with her straight hair. It depends on child and hair… everyone is different. Mommy’s know better than Mimi’s because Mimi’s do not live with child full time. Every child is different.


Whenever they are able to.
The biggest mistake ppl make is to compare their kids to each other.


My daughter brushes her own hair and shes two

My daughter just turned 10. She can’t brush her hair. She tries but it gets tangled pretty bad. She’s strong willed & won’t let me do it for days. It gets matted in the back. It becomes uncomfortable for her then she wants me to do it it would be easier for her & I if she just let me brush her hair twice a day like I always have. I plan on continuing to brush it for her until she is able to do it correctly.

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My 6 year old has been brushing her own hair since she was 4, she now puts in in a low ponytail. I go back over it and refix it if we are going somewhere. I allow her to do it because it’s not fair for me to squash her independence.

My 12 and 17 year olds still need my help. 12 year old has thick curly hair - that I even struggle to brush. 17 year old has really thick hair and nearly down to her bum. It’s a lot to try and manage.

Curly hair care is very different from straight and depending on the curls, should not be brushed daily. Brush it only when wet, refresh daily with water. Time to look up how to care for curly hair properly


My daughter is 9 and has super curly hair and does it alone

My girls are 11 and almost 13 and have been brushing their own hair for a few years already. Whether they do a good job is a different story. Lol your daughter should know the concept and be trying. But everyone is different and we shouldn’t be comparing.

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My daughter is 12 and has been brushing her own hair for many years now.

My 10 year old does brush own hair my 9 year old tries but not very well that I have to go behind her and brush more out.she doesn’t get underneath.

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How curly? Can they brush it without tangling it more…and just don’t want to do it? Do they try and really struggle? Have you actually had them try more than just recently? Or is this sort of a new thing for you? if so…why?

Super Curly hair can be a HUGE pain to brush…especially long curly hair.
It’s really easy to actually make the tangles worse if you don’t brush it the right way and it can take a bit to learn and put “the right” way into practice.
You’re not wrong for wanting them to learn…but this is one of those things you can’t really just stop doing it and expect them to figure it out either.

My daughter is 8 and has to be told 9,365,973 times to brush her hair before she actually does it and then she only brushes the top layer of it and hides her rats. So, basically, my daughter is 8 and I still brush her hair. If I didn’t, she would have dreadlocks.

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I always had mine start doing theirs then I would check it. Once they were good on their own I would stop… I do still help when they want a more difficult style.

My girls are 9 and 13 and they do their own hair but always come to me and ask if it looks good I’ll go back and fix it

My daughter is 9. She has to brush her hair the best she can every day. When she is done I brush and do her hair for the day.

My 6year old insists on doing her own hair. But I always have to help her out.
I’m not gonna be available forever to do her hair, so it’s a good thing she’s doing even a little on her own.

My girls brush their own hair but they have straight hair. I have curly hair and I do not brush my hair because that ruins the curl and causes a lot of breakage and frizz. They should take care of their hair and comb it in the shower but not brush it afterwards. Curly hair needs different care.

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My daughters have been brushing their hair since they’re little. I helped them out but they’ve been doing it in their own consistently since I’d say 4/5.

My daughter is mixed. And simply can’t do her own hair. It takes hours. It takes over an hour just to shampoo and condition it. That’s not even counting brushing and combing.
Those with curly hair. Have a harder time with doing their own hair.
She will be 13 in July.
Enjoy doing her hair now. One day she won’t need you.
It took me all weekend to do my daughter hair. And a whole bottle of conditioner LMFAO

My 10 year old tries but she’s crap at it x a quick go over before we go out is fine but from wet or any styling like ponytail etc I have to do x

Curly hair is a nightmare sometimes.
Theyre certainly old enough to try even if you finish it off. Independence is important so is self confidence in their ability to care for themselves…but mom still needs to make sure its done properly or it will be a terrible job getting it untangled again.

My daughter is 4 1/2 and is starting to brush her hair on her own with assistance (She only does the top-layer). I think it is important to teach them to put their hair up in a protective hairstyle - A low pony-tail or braid so that the brushing doesn’t become a chore or hassle. I always tell my daughter we need to put her hair at least partially up so it doesn’t become a tangled mess.

My daughter is 11 she has been doing it herself for at least a couple years now.

They are definitely old enough to start learning how to maintain their hair. Curly hair is harder to maintain so they may need extra help keeping the tangles out. But they need to start learning for sure.

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My daughter is 8 and has been brushing her hair since she was about 6 or 7. She doesn’t do a great job and I have to go behind her to make sure she got all the knots but she tries.

The longer, thicker, curlier, or unrulier the hair the harder it will be for them to do it themselves.