Why Do Guys Stop Trying Once They Get the Girl?

QUESTION:

"Why do guys stop trying to get you once in a relationship? No unexpected flowers (just because) - no edible arrangements, etc. Shouldn’t you still 'date' your partner, chase her or even “surprise her” even if being together for a while...?"

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TOP ANSWERS (AS SELECTED BY MODERATOR):

The following top answers have been selected by a moderator from hundreds of responses to the original question.

"If that is your love language, receiving gifts, you should definitely communicate that to your partner…don’t leave them guessing. It is not my love language so I wouldn’t appreciate the gesture as much as I should."

"Because all guys are the same. The sooner you realize the difference between someone wanting the booty and someone to rub your booty. It will just be a heartbreak."

"I mean I cook clean look after our baby’s I rub & tickle his back runs him baths etc and I still get nothing in return I’ve given up expecting anything it would be nice but hey ho."

"After being with someone for 10 years things change. I don't want flowers or edible arrangements. I want my side of the bed warmed up before I get in bed. I want my scrubbie put back on top after he showers. I want a random bath ran with Epson salts and a candle lit. And it all goes both ways. Date nights are still amazing for after 10 years I don't want a 'boyfriend' I want a husband. You shouldn't expect a man to still treat you like only his girlfriend."

"What do women do to keep ‘dating’ their partner? I feel men are expected to be so chivalrous and women just get to be spoiled with nothing in return for the men."

"Start doing the same for him, he'll start reciprocating on his own."

"I guess my question is, do you do the same to him?? If you do, then absolutely he needs to step up. If not, maybe he doesn’t feel the love and is shutting down? Or is he just in his own head and is having a hard time? Or doesn’t realize that’s what you want and need to be shown?? Men have feelings too, they need love and support as well. Been with my hubby for almost 18 years. Things change, expectations and roles and needs change, and if he doesn’t know what you need, it isn’t fair to have these standards."

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