In March my fiancé was talking to an ex booty call from a couple years prior, supposedly. He said they only talked on the phone once and texted for a couple days before I found out. He said she was the one who got a hold of him which I believe because there was a voicemail where she asked if he was ever going to talk to her again. I only found out all this because I looked at his phone and seen a message that said hope you got some rest 💋💋💋. After a couple days of interrogation did I find out they had talked on the phone for almost an hour while he was supposedly at work busy, that’s what he told me when he had called me right after her and only talked to me for two mins.
We had fought and the night I found out he called her, after I did haha, and told her to not text or call him again. He blocked her number and deleted everything.
This past month I spent some time with family in another state. I came back home and got the feeling to check his phone. I found on his messenger that a week before me coming back he had gotten a hold of this ex booty call. He had text her a couple times and then when she replied he called her. He then called her two more time the next morning but she didn’t answer. He blocked her and tried to delete the message but ended up putting it in archive.
When I asked why he said he wanted to explain why he couldn’t talk to her anymore and he didn’t know why he called her twice the next day.
I’m very hurt as there should be no reason to them talking anymore, plus I’m pregnant. What would y’all do?
I’d break it off - as he can’t be trusted and using excuses. He can’t have his cake and eat it too. I’d begin working on coparenting since you are pregnant.
Leave . It’s miserable trying to trust your husband after he betrays his wife. Leaving is better than staying . You can hurt just as well without him than with him .
Tell him that you have come to the conclusion that he does not want you or the family you are creating as if he did he would not be doing what he is doing. He would not lie and try to make excuses for it either. Leave, have your baby, get full custody and file child support.
I could make a couple capes and moonlight as Superman with those red flags. Girl, leave, he’s tryin to contact an ex??? More than once??? What you allow will continue and since he sees you’ll stay regardless, well, he’ll just get better at hiding it. How do I know? 10 years of my life with a POS just like that…
If she is so important to him , let him have her. Obviously he has her in his best interest over you and the baby. So kick his ass out and move on or you will be dealing with his shit for a looooonnnngggg time and you deserve so much better
So many red flags
Had to interrogate him for him to tell the “truth” which I’d be willing to bet isn’t the actual truth. Then he contacted her again after a huge blowout and saw he hurt you.
And tried to sneak it.
He may only be talking to her because when he does it makes him feel like his former younger self or some egotistical shit, BUT I say run girl run!!! If he is contacting her he isn’t happy. And you’re not happy to make this post. Find someone that you can trust talking to an ex and it not lead to inappropriate things ( as I believe people should be able to be friends with their ex to an extent that doesn’t cross any lines of being inappropriate).
And be with someone that doesn’t make you feel like you have to check his phone!!
Do yourself and your child a favor…………leave him where he stands! If you put up with this behavior it will always be this way. Some where there is a Man that will love, cherish, and respect you, this man is not him!
Hmm Read back ur own ur post ur words …Sorry but the man is playing u not once but alott of times u caught him chatting with his Ex an he is Not finish from her thats a Red flag forever ur life is going to be in Misery wondering what else is he doing with her…
Once a cheater is always a cheater suck it up and stay and deal with the disrespect or leave and get him on child support and just do you and your kids.
He took the very first opportunity he could to get ahold of her. And he probably will do it again…if not her then another female. Don’t waste your time just co-parent with him instead.
My story is slightly different. My husband didn’t tell me about his ex. Our first years together I found out he lied and he actually lived with her. I’ve been finding out all kinds of things about his double life and even though he claims they were just friends my whole thing is why is she a secret? He never talks about her. And on top of that she knows about me. I ended up having 2 and 1 on the way when I found out but the one on the way died. He doesn’t live with me any more and hasn’t moved back with her. Supposedly he barely talks to her but I want that to completely stop. We have a therapy appt on the 15 bc we can’t seem to do this on our own. Mostly because I feel like he isnt sorry. He should be sorry. My goodness he was so angry when he had to come for his 1st daughter’s birth with me and I had no idea why. So very angry that I apologized bc he wouldn’t tell me what he had better to do. It was HER birthday. That’s why he was mad. Nope it’s either me or her there is no in-between. I’m trying to get a letter of thought put together before the appt. Because I am still hot about it.
so you have a liar for a baby daddy. that’s pretty much the bottom line. he’s your fiancee??? there’s a reason for that. He’s not gonna ever be a husband dear.
He was calling because he was meeting up or trying too. I think everybody seems to forget breaking boundaries in a relationship is just as much a deal breaker as physical cheating. Move on.
I went through this over and over and over! He will never stop. Do the right thing for you. The no trust will drive you more insane than the actual cheating
Separate and make him show you that he’s as invested as you are before considering getting back, otherwise you accept that he’s not trustworthy, and has no boundaries. It’s exhausting trying to get a man to change for you, don’t entertain it. It’s a losing battle. When the feelings are mutual, the effort is equal. Set your boundaries now before you are in over your head.
Hes not gonna leave her alone. She’s his “backup” for when youre not around or when you’re busy. If you’re okay with it, then stay. If not, I think you have some decisions to make
If I were you. I’d leave. As much as you live that man. And he may be the father of you baby. Trust me there are plenty out there. Who wouldn’t mind dating some one like you with a child who isn’t there’s. I mean before it wasn’t like that. Now and days things changed and so did people. Now guys don’t care. They just wanna be loved as much as us woken do. Leave now that you can. If you have to move out of state do so. You have time. Baby isn’t born yet. And. You can decide weather you want him in baby life or not. Until he man’s up. Then you can add him in baby life. For now do you. And for your own good.
Think hard about the situation. You can’t deny it. Either work past it or drop now. You need to take care of things as they happen. Not bring it up later to ruin your relationship
Get out of the relationship. You don’t trust him, as evidenced by you checking his phone. He can’t be trusted, as evidenced by messages found on his phone.
I would leave. Bootycall implies thats someone he messed around with sexually. Why would he feel the need to explain himself to her, he has no obligation. The whole thing sounds weird and I wouldn’t be surprised if she was more than a bootycall, she’s probably a legit ex.
Depends, do you want a cheating husband? Baby daddy or not. He dosent deserve you ir the baby, he’s a boy not a man about to be a father. He will cheat again, they always do.
I would probably leave and go visit my family for a more permanent stay. Do it before you marry him. Hes lying to you and trying to get a hold of his ex. That’s a huge nope for me
First and foremost when you have to check your fiance’s phone you know that your relationship is going nowhere your insecurities and his infidelity are not a combination so I suggest you leave him and be happy by yourself.
He knew he wasn’t supposed to talk to her. You already made that clear. He talked to her anyways and tried to delete it. His ACTIONS show he has no respect for you or your boundaries. Words don’t mean a damn thing hun. Actions do
real love doesn’t take bargaining and begging.
