If he doesn’t want to get help you cant help him and having all of that weight over your shoulders its too much
My ex husband served me with divorce papers, a year after and we are still married bc he doesn’t know why he is not signing while he started a new family and taking care of 2 kids and forgetting about his own
It wont change and they are always the victim, talking bad about you bc they are the victims
He has to want to help himself. You can definitely be with someone with bipolar and get through it. Give time for meds to work. Probably best to see a psychiatrist and therapist.
Is he being honest about the weed use? He sounds like an addict not bipolar. ( which takes 3 years to properly diagnose and medication isn’t prescribed without an actual diagnosis. Not sure where you live but good luck. I’m bipolar btw. I’ve taken meds for 14 years and still have quite extensive mood swings. I live day by day, and stay in a routine with adequate sleep.
It very well may not just be Bipolar alone. He could also be ADHD & Have Anxiety as well. I’ve been thru something very similar with my partner of 20+ uears & he was the same until he was put on meds. Granted not all are the same, but once he got on his for all of this, he was totally different. Maybe not everyday in every situation but for the most part. If you truly love him & want the relationship, give it time & once he’s on the meds, sit down & let him know what he’s doing/ done. If after that it doesn’t change, then he obviously doesn’t want to change. Good Luck
I have bipolar disorder, and therapy has brought me along way. When it comes to marriage my husband is there as much as he can be he is only human and will break as he should from my manic episodes. If he works on himself and you on yourself and both together you Will be stronger than most. I’ve been married 10 years and with him for 13. Make sure he owns up to the verbal abuse and apologizes. It will help him grow as a person.
Sounds like you could both use a lot of therapy with that medication.
If u want it too and u both put the effort in, anything is possible. Do YOU want it to work? That’s the honest question to ask.
You both have to want to love each other better just one won’t work. It will take time, patience and love. Good luck! Love, hugs and prayers! 
Read up on bipolar and weed mixed together. Not good
You say he is being seen for bipolar but are you being seen for your depression and other issues? You need to go about getting yourself treated too if not. As for him, bipolar or not, he may just be an asshole. Give him some time on meds to give him a chance to change. You have children so you should try everything before you walk away. Including possibly couples counseling.