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"I have been with my boyfriend 2 years and found out 3 weeks ago I will not be able to have anymore children. I have two kids from my previous relationship and my bf loves them like his own. I feel guilty I can’t have more children, and he has always wanted children of his own. Is it wrong for me to want to walk away to give him that chance? I have a fear of him resenting me in the future, there’s so much that can change."
TOP ANSWERS (AS SELECTED BY MODERATOR):
The following top answers have been selected by a moderator from hundreds of responses to the original question.
"I would ask him what he’d want."
"I would definitely talk to him. That’s the first place to start."
"I think this should be his choice …discuss it with him …"
"This is something that you need to discuss with him. Ask him how he feels about you not being able to give him kids of his own. You do know though that blood doesn’t mean anything to most."
"I’d talk to him. Things can happen in the future regardless of whether or not you could have bio kids together. He can’t resent you for something not in your control. There’s also surrogacy or other ways to have a baby in the future if it is that important to him. Just have open communication."
"That’s his choice to make, not yours. Let him end it if that’s what he wants."
"Don’t assume he’d resent you, that’s not fair to him. Ultimately he is the one that deserves to make his own decision here… Not you make it for him."
"Talk to him about this, what about a surrogate"
"There’s also so many other ways you can have them too. Don’t walk from a perfectly good bloke without talking. A lot. See what he thinks and wants. Fostering, adoption , surrogacy"
"He’s a grown ass man. It’s his decision. Don’t make it for him. He may love you and those kiddos more than anything. Dreams change. Wants change. Sometimes we choose to let go of and mourn previous dreams because we love what’s in front of us more. It doesn’t make it any less worthwhile."
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