My suggestion is to seek professional advice. There may be angles that you’re not aware of.
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It’s nobody’s business but yours. Somebody just mentioned about writing a will and that’s exactly what you need to do, since your friend is not blood, you wouldn’t want dispute there. I’m glad you have someone you will respect your wishes, too. I hope it doesn’t come to that however. Good luck with everything 
If your parents won’t do what you want than I’d absolutely have your friend be your power of attorney.
Your life, your decision. I don’t agree with who my parents have chosen to take care of there will, but unfortunately it’s none of my business 
You need to do whats best for you kids. when ur gone ur gone u don’t want regrets. Maybe your parents are just worried they will be cut our of there grandkids lifes. You can make this clear that they never will be that theywill all always have a role to play. your parents are acting very wrong they should support u even if they don’t fully agree.
you are not wrong to intrust your friend with power of attorney instead of your family if that is the best way to have your wishes enforced.
A living will would be an easier alternative as it would outline exactly what you do and do not want should something happen to you.
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- Definitely get the one who you trust to make the decisions best for you.
- Make a living will and make sure it’s precise and clear.
Its your life, not theirs to make & as an adult you can make your own choices/decision. From what they have told you, they would not follow your will or wishes. Yes get a Living Will & a Financial Will to protect your wishes. Make sure you put "Do not recsitate or incubate, no forms of life suppot) your estate representative can have your will & Durable Power of Attorney you made to for estate, a petition wavier & consent appoints a personal representative of my estate & living will. Durable Power of attorney to handle my affairs & appointment of a resident agent on your requested behalf. Each state may have different forms titles & an estate attorney can provide you with documents. Just make sure the hospitals have your wishes on file and that no one can intercede except who is on the living will. Call an speak to the legal side to make sure you have what you need so that your wishes are covered. Especially a will…
My family, my mother, bio father (died when mum pulled the plug on life support brain dead) me my brother my stepdad. We all already had the talk don’t keep me alive on machines, elaborated to if I’m bitten by a zombie kill me before I turn. But we discussed respected each other’s wishes and never thought it would be a thing we faced… but after a heart attack my dad is brain dead and New Year’s Day 2014 is his death anniversary. It wasn’t easy but we honored the wishes he gave us. As much as it hurts, my mum had to change her signature cause she couldn’t stand to see the same signature she used to sign his death… we honor what they want and what we’d want and that’s not brain dead.
Either which way you choose is your choice but there’s also always simply going and writing a Will signing and taking it to be legally filed will save that battle too because you can put DNR and example but to be cremated afterwards in there and that’s how they would go by can even put in there who your belongings and finances go to by a WIll
If someone isn’t willing to honor your wishes while you’re incapacitated then they aren’t the ones to make the decisions for you in the first place no matter who the heck they are
What you are looking for is an advanced directive. It covers all your wishes including a living will and power of attorney.
You are an adult. Adults ‘leave home’ and make their own decisions. Parents have done their job. As an adult you are in a position to make your own decisions and your good friend (with a possible back-up?) agrees with your wishes. Why hesitate? Being kept alive artificually when your body is ready to let go is not a good decision.
It’s your life and your decisions. Just because they are your parents doesnt mean you have to let them have it their way, particularly if you know they wont do what you want.
Make the decision about what you want (in detail) and write out an advance directive. Then give your friend POA. When you’ve already got it in writing, it makes it so much easier on your friend to argue with your family.
I have a very detailed directive (right down to the percentage outcome for me to live a decent life or to have the plug pulled and how many days on life support I would want) and have my husband as my POA. He basically just has to read the directive and follow the prompts. I have it that my family can express their wishes but my husband has the final say.
My SIL asked me to be her POA because her parents have said the same thing as yours.
It’s your choice. You should also designate your friend your Medical Proxy and prepare a living will. Your attorney and the medical team will not allow anyone to disregard those legal documents.
You go with the people you know will honour your wishes, not the ones making decisions for their own emotional welfare.
It’s your life and more importantly your death, if your folks won’t honor your wishes then you have someone in power that will. Just have it all legal all in writing and emphatically clear so there is no room for interpretation or challenge
I am married and my best female friend has power of attorney over my health proceedings if I’m unable to decide for myself. I do not trust that my wishes would be respected by some of my family and my husband would not function well under that kind of pressure. I also believe he would doubt himself/his decisions and I don’t want to put that kind of weight on him. Not when my best friend and I have talked at length about what our final wishes would be.
If you truly trust the friend, go ahead with your plans. Or make your wishes known on paper and appt an attorney to handle them.
Youre talking about your life. Simply do what feels right, your parents wont stop loving you and will grow to live with your decision. Best of luck in decoding💯
If they won’t follow your wishes then NO… too bad for them if they don’t agree with it, your an adult you can choose/ do as you wish whether they like it or not… I would definitely give your friend the POA… your parents will either come to term with it and like it or they won’t… its just too bad for them… I would NOT give anyone POA over me that would not follow my wishes.
A medical power of attny and a living will are very important. Also, durable power of attny is good so your bills can be paid if you become unable to take care of your oiwn business. Just remember, power of attny dies when you die. You also need a regular will naming an executor. Do all these things and you are covered from any other interferences.
Personally I would ask the person who I trusted most to carry out my wishes no matter what anyone thought! Good luck - not easy!
If your friend is willing be sure you have all the paperwork completed…
I believe you can have a living will stating what your wishes are , so incase of a situation where you arent of sound mind the decisions are already made and your wishes have to be followed, so if you choose not to be ressesatated, its in writing and your patents cannot have you hooked up to machines even if they want to! I know because i was a single parent and had this done and set in place incase anything happened to me when the kids were young…
Make a will that describes everything you want if your in a poor state like brain dead and what you want for death. Then make her power of attorney. The will must be legally signed and witnessed. Then she can make those choices but your will also says what you want so your parents can’t really contest it.
This is your choice.Ask a trusted friend.Make it legal.Your parent could not protest and change it.
Kudos on thinking about this situation. Many people don’t. You can simply put your wishes onto paper and get them notorized. Keep them in a safe place. You can also go the route of an attorney. I’ve personally witnessed how this can go very badly if not handled . Do your research. Have a backup plan in case you’re friend is unable to fulfill it due to circumstances beyond control. Check into proper procedure in that event. Good luck.
You are a legal adult of sound mind, correct?
If your friend is willing, go to a lawyer and get it in writing and notarized. Make sure it is noted that your parents/family have already stated they will not honour your wishes.
I deal with this more than I’d like with my work. I’d say your POA should be the option that makes you the most comfortable
Its fine yes I was my.friends Next of kin and unfortunately she was diagnosed with cancer and died very soon after diagnoses (3 weeks ) as next of kin I had the power to act upon her wishes ie medication such as if she wanted to stop it I could instruct that and so on although I didn’t need to make them. Her power if attorney was he god daughter who did all the will side of things. All her wishes were met. It’s upto you who.you choose for such a situation my next of kin is my partner my power of attorney is my mum, both know that if it is evident I’m.not going to survive without support or be so badly affected that it limits my life to just switch me off. But ultimately i hope they would discuss together how and what happens and both agree before anything happens to myself and discuss our children ect. You’re parents should respect your wishes it’s your death not theirs 
so yes go ahead and appoint her as power of attorney
Also look into a living will wherr u can put your wishes etc and what you want .do this while you have full capacity .it is legal and binding and would allow you to make the decisions you want to happen when not able to make those decisions .
Of course, you can choose to name whoever you wish to have power of attorney for you. It is your life. It is your right to choose how a life or death situation should be handled.
It definitely isn’t about them. Do what you feel is best.
“Power of attorney” may not be the correct legal document for what you want…
You might consider a professional fiduciary. They are licensed and bonded. You make a revocable living trust naming them as successor trustee, also can give POA and Medical POA. Friends may come and go but this would be an answer.
It’s ur decision and no one can tell u what to do otherwise and if u already know ur parents would go against ur wishes then make it friend poa
A letter to your solicitor explaining what you want should suffice
Whoever will follow your best interests and wishes. Plain and simple. Even if that’s a stranger.
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Hi 
I’m in Canada and not sure what your medical providers offer. Here, we can have a DNR. It stands for Do Not Resuscitate. You discuss this, and sign papers with your doctor.
As for naming your best friend power of attorney, it’s completely that simple and again, here in Canada is part of your medical file.
The only thing about your parents is the strife and guilt they may cause you to feel. At the time in life where you couldn’t voice your opinion, you saw things unfold that didn’t sit right with you.
Kudos to you for recognizing that you want a responsible person to carry out YOUR wishes 
Let the tangled emotions go and if you have to, let your parents know it’s taken care of. End of story. The less they know- the less strife for you now and your best friend; should the time ever arise.
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Have the paperwork done up. Make sure she has a copy so they can’t trump her
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I’d go with the best friend to be honest since they won’t honor your wishes
Give your friend power of attorney, they will at least do as you request
Do what first your head tells you to do than go with your heart I feel your freind should be the one good luck
Give it to your friend. You have the right to have your decisions honored.
Do what makes sense to you. Don’t try and please others if it’s not what you want 
I don’t see a problem with your wishes if that’s truly what you want.
If u make a will then they have to honor your wishes
Yes I would leave that decision to my friend I sure my wishes would be made
Consult an attorney. What you should do depends on where you live.
I did with mine he lives in another state and has all my wishes on paper
Put it in writing…legally. Then job done
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Tell your entitled parents to do one 
You made the right decision.
Your parents sound like narcissistic control freaks tbh. Get it in writing and notorized. Problem solved.
Please go speak to an attorney and at least have a full understanding of what you could be doing… Know all the facts… Also look up a DNR…
It is your right to decide who YOU want to have Power of Attorney, not your parents.
You must make the decision for yourself. It is who you can feel comfortable with and who is willing to take the responsibility.
Luckily my parents have had this conversation with me and asked what I’d like to happen.
Big fat "do not resuscitate " on my file and my parents are aware and y I chose this.
Unless I’m going to make a full recovery just let me die
It is not thier god given right to make those decisions. It is yours. As an adult we have that right. Not our parents. Your wishes should be honoured. As you are an adult. Give your friend power of attorney and also make a will and leave with a solicitor. Cover every base. If a parent loved their child then their wishes would be upheld. How selfish of them to think its their right to over rule you??? Awful overbearing people.
It’s really really difficult as a family member to make those decisions … I know my mum was absolutely a mess making the DNR decision for my terminal father when his heart started to give (he died from cancer Less than 3 days later) …
You nominate whoever is going to make the best decision for you …
But you absolutely need to have the discussion with the entire family or they can make a decision when the time comes as NOK… everybody needs to be on the same page
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Nope fuck that can’t stand arragant old school ass parents like that! You are a grown women and YOUR wishes need to be fulfilled that pertain YOUR life. Make legal arrangements so if something ever does happen, there isn’t any room for funny shit to go on.
Give the power to whom you trust. Your parents have already said they eont honour your wishes, so go with your friend or other, that will honour you.
Also , it is unfair on your parent for them to have to have that responsibility at that time. So tell them your wishes, so they know, if the worst ever happened, that the friend will be honouring you.
Do not give it to your parents. Go with the best friend for sure.
Your body your choice. You are not a minor
Haha Sana Akbar Qureshi, what do you think?
Choice from the heart.
You need to do what is best for you.
No but you have to thi on some
It’s ur life and death! U need to do what u want!
Trust those who will respect your Decisions
Sharlene Hartsuyker going toe to toe with your family will be insane if anything happens to you 
Its your choice. No one can tell u that.
Just do it, say nothing it’s no ones business but yours…why rock a boat without reason
Your body your choice
Make a living will. This is the only way to ensure your wishes are followed.
You assign whoever will fulfill your wishes.
It’s your life/death it only matters what you want
No, honestly my BFF will probably end up being mine too
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Make a living will instead. Grant rights to your best friend after you pass. In the will make sure your wishes are spelled out and add that your parents may not override them. POA gives too much power to a person, imo, they could do anything they wanted to with your finances including take everything out of your bank and spend it and you’d have no leg to stand on legally against them.
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Make the arrangements that reflect your wishes. A medical POA for extreme circumstances, is what you want. Limit her power too.
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I agree with other posters. Make a living will and have it put on record.
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As a nurse, you need to go with who will make sure your wishes are followed. And a POA can only step in if you are unable to make your wishes known. There is also a difference in medical power of attorney and financial power of attorney. Also, have a living will drawn up
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Write out explicitly what you would want in a situation and give Health Surrogate POA to whomever will follow that. Hopefully, the situation never comes up. 
Your parents are wrong. You pick whoever you know will respect your wishes. Make sure they are written legally.
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Do a living will and file it with the clerk of court. The doctors will have to abide by it. Give a copy to your best friend, your doctor and whoever else that can make sure it is given to the doctor at the time
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Do as Amy Rose said but do not tell your parents they dont need to know
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Make your friend POA and don’t tell your parents.
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It should always be the person who follows YOUR wishes.
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Absolutely not wrong to want someone who will respect your wishes in that place. I say do it, your parents are being selfish and honestly probably don’t realize it. When my grandfather was in the hospital before passing, my grandmother went against all his wishes and the whole family had to tell her how wrong that was and she eventually changed her mind, but she cared so much she didn’t even see that she was causing more pain. I don’t think your parents are doing this to be hurtful, they just care about you and don’t want to lose you, but they’re absolutely going about it wrong and you should be abke to be at ease knowing if anything ever happens you’ll be cared for the way you’d want
I saw this happen with my parents. My dad got sick and passed at a younger age. My mom made decisions that I knew weren’t what he wanted, but I had no say…it wasn’t my place. If I were in your shoes I’d do a living will and a medical POA. Make your wishes explicitly known in the living will & give medical POA to whomever you know will abide by your wishes outlined in your living will.
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Nah. Its you’re life, not their’s!!! Do as you wish
If they have have already told you that they will not follow your wishes then you must find someone else. 
You are perfectly within your rights to do so and I would do ASAP and make sure that your friend, your parents and your siblings all have a copy, as well as your general practitioner.
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MEDICAL POA, yes. A general can cause some problems. Also make sure you have a living will
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Your choice, not parents
Definitely do what is going to be in your best interest. Parents have clouded judgement cause you are their child. Your friend know the terms and what you want. It will be easier to have the friend make the choices
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Your power of attorney should be the person who will honor your wishes to the fullest. If your parents have already stated they won’t be following said wishes than they lost all right to those kind of decisions. It’s not about hurting someone’s feelings but about YOU and what kind of life YOU are willing to live.
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You need both! A POA and a will. And make sure the POA encompasses all things you want in the event you are incapacitated. Such as financial access to help sort your bills and able to get the money out of your account if it is necessary. You can pick and choose what you want covered, not just medical. Make sure it’s notarized and the will is recorded with the county.
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When my dad passed last year we went against his wishes at the urging of an er Dr. They put him on a ventilator to transfer him to a different hospital just so he wouldn’t die in their hospital. Because of that it gave my mom false hope. For 3 months we sat day in and day out at the hospital with my dad ,who was on a vent and non responsive. However after 3 months he did come back to us, briefly. We got to say goodbye. I will always treasure the last 3 weeks we had with him. If I had to do it over again . I would not have let them out him on a ventilator. He would have passed that day in the er . It was my decision to make and I let others sway my rational thinking. Won’t happen with my mom.
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