My husband sister has a 1 year old and is going through a divorce. I want to get him the cutest Gucci shoes. He and I are doing well enough to afford it with no kids of our own. His sister is going through an expensive divorce. He told me to return the shoes because it’s not right to gift the boy with a gift his own parents may not be able to afford themselves. And it’s “not right” showing them up. I don’t mind. I thought they were cute. We’re okay with it. Is he right? Will it make her feel bad?
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If shes struggling financially it would be way to much
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I personally don’t think a 1 year old needs Gucci shoes.
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It’s so superficial buy them what they need
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Ask your sister in law if you can give them to him. That way, there are no hard feelings from anyone.
Return the shoes. If only you could buy grace.
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Return the shoes take him out to arcade etc the whole family
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Return the shoes and use the money for a grocery gift card for her.
Offer her the money to help her in any way she needs it.
It’s a nice gesture, but the last thing she needs right now is a reminder that other people can do things for her kid that she cant do.
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Gucci shoes??? Really??? How stupid is that!!
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We all go thru struggles and honestly, sometimes the only time my kid can get expensive things is when they are gifted by family. Not saying a 1 year old needs Gucci shoes… my 1 year old wouldn’t even keep shoes on without throwing them thru the store.
Maybe she could use something practical, especially if she’s going thru a divorce. The husband is right, return them.
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It would make me feel bad. Please don’t.
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Maybe just ask her, like omg I seen the cutest little shoes would you care if I got them for him and see what she says.
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I think you should ask her first in private so as not to offend.Everyone is different she may or may not be offended by the offer.
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I’d go for something more practical, or simply ask her what the child needs, you could even tell her about how much you wish to spend in order to get idea.
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Ask her if it’s ok. If she takes offense or gets upset then take them back. If she’s ok with it then give them to him
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A person experiencing a divorce will never care about how cute a shoe or an outfit will look on their child. they will be more concern with their future how they will cope with their broken family.
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As a mother who has been in this situation…I would return the shoes and ask her what the child actually needs.
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I mean it’s a gift and if someone would gift my son something like that i would not mind at all
I think the best is to talk to her about it
Just explain your side and ask her if she will be okay with it
Give her the shoes. How nice of you. I hate when people comment on the clothes my kids wear. I don’t wear Gucci but if my kids want Gucci they are getting Gucci. What was her financial situation before the divorce
Unless she has them on the childs feet all day , every day , he will probably only wear them a handful of times before they don’t fit him anymore .
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Im goin through divorce, cps involved and living in a womens n children’s shelter My best friend always is calling me asking me if its ok to buy my daughter expensive things and its nice knowing that shes loved like that maybe throw in there to if you ever need anything you can just ask us for you the baby or both so she knows that u guys are there for her during this time cuz shits rough to be goin through i always like the reminder that im not alone
To me it sounds like you are rich and want to spoil your niece. The more you have the more you are able to give. But if your husband is against it then he probably knows enough that he is telling you that for a reason.
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I day give him the darn shoes! I think it is a great idea…Mom will probably think it is something special you wanted to do for her little guy…Do not over think this kind gesture…
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Return the shoes and buy them some diapers or bigger clothes for the child. Get the child something that is less expensive that he will outgrow in a matter of month’s!
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I know if it were my child, I would not be upset. I was a single mom for a long time and I struggled. I would not have seen it as anything but a nice gift and an Aunt loving her nephew. Ugh, give them the shoes. If she gets upset, she will get over it. There is nothing wrong with you spoiling your nephew.
I think mom would be more appreciative of new clothes and shoes for next season instead of one pair of designer shoes. But a gift is a gift and you can give whatever you want
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If you want to be the aunt that spoils the babies then do it. Doesn’t matter if they are expensive or she might grow out of them. It’s your money. So the child grows out of them then you put them up for sale or trade. Only thing I would be hesitant about is the opinion of the hubby. You gotta live with him.
Why try to send her child something so expensive knowing she’s going thru a financial stage cz divorce isn’t cheap .it’s one thing to make the child feel he’s wanted it’s another to wave stuff in her face
Maybe put some little bit of effort to think what’s the child need instead of what u think is cute. At least a child friendly fancy dinner will help them unwind
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Why? Is it for him, or for you?
Maybe help her with her “expensive divorce”
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Oh my god these people are something else man 
Im more confused as to why u didnt call him your nephew… why your husbands sisters son.
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No give them a gift card. She may need the money instead
What child needs Gucci?
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Take the shoes back and give her the money instead. Why the fuck would you buy really expensive shoes that a kid is literally going to grow out of in a week? You may have the money but you certainly don’t have the brains. Girl, think.
Maybe instead of paying a ridiculous amount for Gucci shoes…you say your sister in law is going through an expensive divorce? Why don’t you buy the child some bigger clothes and maybe do some food shopping to help in that way ? And maybe you and your husband take your nephew out for the day to give her some me time ? Or if your that well off pay for a spa day for her ??
Omg all you people are crazy don’t listen to them… Give the baby the shoes maybe go buy a few more things you know she uses for the baby maybe a bottle of wine for mommy and surprise her… She needs this I PROMISE!!! You will touch her heart more than you realize…
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Maybe return the shoes and give her a gift card so that she can get the things she really needs. Save the Gucci until the child is a teenager and looking for labels…
I was once gifted a baby onesie that cost £100. Needles to say we put it on once, and that was it. Not worth it. I would return the shoes and get her a gift card. She can buy what she needs for him, especially now.
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It’s a cute idea but is he walking? Or does he usually wear shoes? Some parents dont bother because they are there for show if they arent walking but I did put shoes on my babies, they’re adorable 
I would accept them and not trip over giving the gift. It the kid has nice shoes then that would make the parent look good, correct? No one has to know otherwise.
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Kids grow too quickly. It’s a waste to get something he’ll be grown out of so fast
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Possibly make her feel bad. Maybe something practical like a zoo membership?
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Id return them just because they grow so fast. But then take the money and ball out on cheaper clothes ina bigger size for fall/winter.
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If i was the mom in that situation I would feel quilt for not being able to afford shoes like that. I have had something like this happen (not with shoes tho) and it threw me into a depressive state for weeks.
It’s a gift and you’re just being nice! I would give them to him.
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I would return them and maybe get some toys or clothes instead since half would be split between two houses and maybe a spa day for her if you’re feeling really generous
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Yes he is right…especially with emotions running high right now! He is also 1 and until he stops growing son fast stick with affordable gifts. Honestly at that age the best gift to baby and parents is to take the baby on a make a memory day! Zoo, the park etc. Take lots of pics.
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A 1 year old doesn’t need Gucci shoes…
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Return and do it another time. He will know his sister better than you. If he says return then return them.
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I’ve been on the receiving end of this and honestly I was thrilled my kid had something nice even if it wasn’t me that bought it 
to each their own i guess
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I mean as long as the baby isn’t in need of anything else like outfits the money could pay for or diapers or just something he NEEDS I don’t see a problem with it at all who cares if they can’t afford it. It’s a gift and your an aunt your supposed to do that stuff if your capable
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Maybe give her something more practical… babies grow out of shoes real fast and she could probably use the money more than shoes
Since she’s going through a expensive divorce, I’m sure the gesture of offering her the money you spent on the shoes would mean much more to her. As for the 1 year old, he’ll appreciate a bottle of bubbles much more than expensive shoes. 
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When I give gifts I try to make them thoughtful and helpful. Giving the shoes might be something you want, but how does that benefit your SIL or baby? Baby will likely outgrow them in a second anyway.
If she’s going through a divorce and tight on money, I’d fish for what would be a helpful purchase and get that instead.
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I’d enjoy anything someone thought to give my children. Its a thoughtful gesture.
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Perhaps a toy or clothes or ask the mom is there anything the child needs,…expensive Gucci shoes that a child will grow out of fast waste of money no matter you can afford it
I think this is a nice gesture. Maybe run it by her first. Like, “hey I wanted to get so so some Gucci shoes I saw. Is that okay? I don’t want to step on your toes or anything.” I don’t see what’s wrong with spoiling your nephew sometimes. I’m a single mother and don’t always have the money for things like that. I appreciate when my family surprises her with it. She knows materialistic things don’t matter. It’s a nice splurge once in a while 
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Oh stfu bragging about Gucci shoes 
that’s nor what life is about. Return the shoes that kid will grow out of in a month and get the woman something her kid actually needs.
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Way too expensive to give a one year old those types of shoes that the child will outgrow real soon. Return them n get the child age appropriate stuff. Shoes I wouldn’t waste 250-400$ on
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Unless she can’t afford to get her own kid necessities they need and he could use some practical things, I think that’s a super thoughtful gift! Sure he might grow out of them fast, but it’s the thought that counts and he will be stylin’ 
after all, you said you can afford them so I don’t see why not!
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This post makes no sense. You say he wants you to return the shoes and then you say ‘we’re’ okay with it, if he wants you to return the shoes then he’s not okay with it. I would say to the sister you’ve seen these lovely shoes you’d like to get her son is that okay, but really one of you should know how she would take it. Some people would be okay with it, other people would feel inadequate or angry by you doing it, so it really depends on the person
I never understood why people feel bad about accepting a gift more expensive than they can afford. If someone can offer you that gift, then why do you have to let that affect you? Who cares what you earn? That’s got nothing to do with what someone wanted to get for you. So you’re going to sit in self pity because you can’t have nice things, and not allow yourself to enjoy something you yourself didn’t have to pay for? I don’t understand.
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Personally, I don’t think it’s appropriate to gift very expensive shoes to a 1 year old. Think of more practical gifts.
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Gift the shoes! But gift something else that could be helpful as well. Especially since mom is falling on hard times. I do agree with other comments- the shoes are expensive and he will likely grow out of them in weeks, maybe a month. But if you want to give them, then give them. No harm. 
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Return the shoes and take the money you spent on the shoes and put it on a gift card Visa. That way you show her you care and you are there to support her.
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Well hell i went to the mall bought my daughter and son named brand shoes they grew out of then within 6 months or less honestly its just a waste of money but on the other hand you bought em so they could of been kept for the thought envolved but with most children they’ll grow out of them as quick as you by em.
I mean they are going to grow out of them in a month… 🤷
I’d say no. I’d offer cash
Ask his sister if she minds…the child is 1…the child don’t know the difference between Gucci or wmart…
Its your husbands sister, I would follow his lead in this situation 
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I mean it’s shoes so like, it’s up to you. But I would wait with the expensive gifts like that till the kid is older and won’t be needing a different size every month or two tho.
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I have five kids my sister has a grown kid she buys expensive stuff for them all the time I love it it’s not wrong at all it’s awesome though I don’t usually go for or do expensive shoes with somebody that little maybe when they started school would be kind of cool for them but it’s awesome to do for them
I would return them only because the baby will hardly wear them… spend that same money on something the baby can use for a long time or on building memories like a special trip or outing … or a toy that can grow with him like a basic swing set or a battery ride
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I would simply say “I saw the cutest pair of shoes I thought (name) would like, what do you think”? And if she says yes give then to her
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He’s 1? Shoot he’s probably outgrown the shoes already lol. Get him a hard book or a toy be logical maybe clothes for him to grow into for the appropriate season y’all are going into
Buy the kid what you want that’s not your fault the sister going through an expensive divorce. She should appreciate the gift and if u can afford them then awesome I’m sure it wont stop at that. Wtf does he want u to do go exchange for walmart shoes ? Nothing wrong with walmart but a shoe is a shoe
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I’d wait until the baby is older lol
Buy something the boy can appreciate and use for a long time. If you’re ok spending that kind of money, buy a swingset, powerwheel, etc something he can enjoy (assuming they have a yard or no HOA restrictions)
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Give her the receipt so she can return them and buy him half a summer wardrobe. Expensive shoes for babies are crazy. You get maybe 3 months out Of them.
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Thats expensive. My son grew 3 shoe sizes in a year
Gift him the shoes. Buy mumma something special as well. Or book a girls spa day and a babysitter (grandma?)
Pamper that woman and spoil her baby. They both deserve it
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You better take them back before they get inserted in your behind!!!
As a mom I would be grateful for any gift given, but it’d be really sad when in a month those expensive shoes didn’t fit any more. Get mom a photo shoot for the baby, buy him a badass learning toy, the aquarium so it’s cool and take pics, something that’ll last awhile.
Can you even return clothing rn? I know you cant at Walmart.
I would cry, getting a gift like that during a hard time
Personally I don’t let my kids accept gifts above our means. They can earn it when they’re old enough if they want it that bad
I wouldn’t spend that much on shoes for a baby but that’s just me. Take that money and buy him toys, he’d like that more then a pair of shoes he’ll probably were 3 times and out grow🤷
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I would feel kinda offended & like someone was rubbing it in my face. I would be very grateful that someone would gift my kid such a nice gift but I also would be like, jeez I can’t afford these & would be hard on myself about it. Every parent wants to give their kids everything that they can but people do fall on hard times & you wouldn’t wanna come off wrong.
Maybe ask her what she needs for the kid since she’s having a hard time. I’m sure he could use a ton of things besides 1 pair of shoes. You could do 3 outfits, a toy, & regular shoes for the price of expensive shoes.
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I swear some of y’all submit the dumbest stuff. 
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Your hubby probably knows his sister. I would take his lead on this one.
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If you knew his sister enough to know if she minds you buying those shoes or not. The child is 1. He isn’t going to know the difference on anything. Maybe show her support. Or offer to watch the little guy so she can have a spa day or something. She’s about to go down a rough road.
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A one year old will probably not get much use out of new shoes unless he/she is already walking, so if I were to say anything it would be to maybe size up? But otherwise I see no issue in gifting someone something they may not be able to afford. I also don’t think that shoes are something your husband should worry she’ll be upset over. If you were going to surprise her with a bigger item for her child that she may want input on or something she was already saving for herself, I feel that would be crossing the line. This just sounds like an incredibly kind and thoughtful gesture
What? Lol idc. My dad buy expensive things for my daughter all the time and we’re just grateful for it. Always buys the biggest toys for her birthday and Christmas and buying her jordans and yeezys but i really don’t care just thankful
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The boy won’t even know the difference and will only wear them a few months
I personally would be mad