I have 5 step kids who stay with us every other weekend and whenever else they want to, and 3 (almost 4) bio kids full time. It took a long time, but we have finally been able to give them all their own space. We have three upstairs bedrooms. One is for the two boys, one is for the older girls, and the largest room is split up for the four youngest girls. My eight-year-old bio daughter shares the big room with her sisters (all here full time, sisters are 3 and 4), and she has really been in need of her own room. They never leave her alone, and her bed is the only place she has away from them, but they are still right there pestering. I reeeeeally donât want to take space from my step kids, Iâd either have to move the boys (15 and 9) or the big girls (13 and 10) in with my little girls, and Iâm just not sure itâs fair. My husband says itâs fine because âThis isnât their full-time house, and it is the eight-year oldâs,â but to me, that would be acting like this isnât equally their home, and I want them to feel like it is. Thoughts?
Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. Would it be wrong to move my step-kids rooms so my daughter can have her own?
Why donât you join the 8 and 13 and 10 year olds room , that way she still has her own room majority of the time and is more in her age group when they are there
Move the three oldest girls into the big room and put the two younger ones in the room your step daughters are in.
I think you are doing a disservice to your own kids that have no where else to go and stare at empty rooms being used 4-6 days a month it sounds like.
Why not ask all the kids to solve this - get them involved in the decision making process. The older girls might not mind sharing with the little ones if they are only with you for shorter periods of time. Kids are amazingly kind and creative when involved in the decision making process.
Could you just put her in the room with the older set of girls
Why not have the 13, 8, and 10 year old share a room, the 15 and 9 share a room, and then the 3 and 4 share a room?
Move the kids and give your older one some peace
Why nit put her in with the 10yo and 13yo?
Sheâll have her iwn space majority of the time
I donât think itâs fair that one kid kids their own room while all the others have to share.
Iâd put her in with the 10 and 13 year old. That was she has her own space when they arenât thereâŚand theyâre closer in age/interests when together
Look on Pinterest, search âdivided kids roomsâ or âshared kids roomsâ. They have a ton of ideas. Maybe you can find a way to create her own space. Or to split the big room between the littles and the Bigs?
Do it. Growing up and going to my dad and step moms house my sister and I shared a room. The kids that lived there got their own rooms because they were there 24/7. I didnât mind. Give your kids their own room.
I canât offer advice but I just want to say from the view point of a stepdaughter, I love how thoughtful you are of all of them!! 
Why canât the 8year old share with the two step girls? She would have her own room for most of the time.i donât think itâs fair they have to share with the little kids either because they arenât going to like the littler kids getting into their stuff
Put her in with 13 & 10 year old theyâre not there full time anyways and itâll still b their room when they come on the weekends.
Iâd let her have her own room, I donât think itâs fair how thatâs her full time home and she has to share with other kids who is barely even there
You would either have to move her in with the older girls or get her own room some how. The boys do to their ages could not share a room with any of the girls. (atleast depending on where your at). Also if you have a basement you could remodel to give the kids more room.
Move the 8 year old into the room with the older girls and keep the younger girls in the other room. Then the 8 year old will have her own space when the others are not there
My first though, like many others, is to put her with the older girls. Let them share a room
That would be wrong and you will make those kids feel so unwanted you can ask how they feel sharing with your daughter bit my step mom took my room and I never wanted to be there or felt welcomed.
The older girls have their own room at their momâs house. Your bio needs her own space. Its seems like you have given consideration to all but her.
Put the 8yo in with the big girls. My youngest son (9) can not wait to move into the âbig boys roomâ when he turns 10. Theyâre all my bio kids but the big boys have the basement family room sized room and the little ones have their own rooms currently. The plan is for the boys to have the basement and my daughter (the youngest) to have her own room and turn little manâs room into a craft room. Being a big kid is a status symbol in my house but the boys donât mind sharing the space, I just get nervous bc the have access to the outside thru a walk out door.
I think it would be shitty. Just put her with the older girls
The boys their age should not be sharing a room with a girl. I definitely understand the desire to move them all around though since the others are not there as much. Put her with the older girls since they arenât there.
If the shared room with the younger girls is large enough a wall could be added to divide the spaceâŚ
Buy some rods. Attach them to the ceiling and use a shower curtain to block off areas of the room to separate it. My daughter did that at first with the two kids. Now she has blocked it off using plywood on the ceiling with wood panels. It cost approximately $40 to block off the room. Paint the boards whatever color to match the room. You canât even tell itâs not professionally done.
Put the 8 year old with the 0lder girls
I agree with everyone saying put her in with the 10 and 13 year old. Sheâll have her own room majority of the time and when the other 2 are there every other weekend it will be like having a sleepover.
I think u should put 3 oldest gitls in the largest room, as 2 of them arent there full time, and put youngest two girls in their current room. That way, most of the time, the 8 year old would have here own space
More than anything the 15 year old would need his own space
This is awful. You have step children that have a room at their dadâs house and a room and their momâs house and your daughter needs space from her younger siblings as she ages and you canât figure out what to do. She gets the room where her step siblings come and use when they come and visitâ- that should be her space. And they share it with her when they come and visit their dad.
When step kids came over which wasnât very often they slept in the living room with their dad I wasnât kicking my son out of his room the 2 lil ones slept in my room plus I didnât want them peeing in the beds
I know it may seem unfair to the step kids but if they arenât there full time, they truly donât need their own rooms. Iâm sure they have their own rooms at their full time house. Your daughter should have her own space in her home. Or possibly make it to where its her room when they arenât there and let her share with the step kids when they come so everyone wins? Sheâll have her own room 90% of the time versus never.
You could move the big girls in with the 8 year old and have the 3 and four year old share a room. That way the 8 year old would practically have her own room until her sisters come over that Iâm sure are less annoying
She can share a room with the older 13 and 10 yr old girls who arenât there full time and that way when they are there they arenât pestering her like the little are. They really arenât that much older than her. Thereâs more of an age difference between her and the littles and even if it was sheâd still have more time to herself sharing with them
I think I did this word problem in algebra in elementary school.
I feel like the kids their full time need the privacy. The ones that live elsewhere full time probably have their own private space when away, your daughter does not. Put the 10 and 13 year old with the little girls (definitely not the boys), and give them the larger room and your daughter her own space.
Why not move your oldest in with the other two older girlsâŚthat way she has her own space most of the time, and then only shares it with older kids some of the time. That might be the best solution
id do it. there no at the house full time
fuck it 
I think you should put 3 oldest girls in the largest room, as 2 of them arenât there full time, and put the youngest two girls in their current room. That way, most of the time, the 8 year old would have her own space 
I think you should put the littles in the smaller room and the 8 yr old and the bigger two girls in one room
Why not move her into the room with the older girls
I agree with everyone saying put her in with the 10 and 13 year old. Sheâll have her own room when the time come because 10 and 13 are likely to be the same age too me
The other girls have their own room At momâs house, why canât yours have her own room, at her full-time house, seems like youâre looking out everyone else but your Daughter
Put your eight year old in with the older girls. Especially if theyâre not there all the time.
Put the 3 older girls in same room and two younger ones on other room simple
Put the 8 year old in with the older girls
Why donât you put the 8 yr old with the 10 and 13 yr old. Much of the time she will be alone but when she shares itâll be with girls closer to her age
Iâd move the 8 yr old in with the two older girls that are there part time. That way the 8 yr old had space to her self most of the time and im sure sheâd be happy to share every other weekend with the older girls. Their closer to her age/ growing up stage then the younger ones
So why canât the 8 year old share a room with the 2 older girls?
Since theyâre hardly there, she would have the room to herself most of the time. 
I would move the 8 year old in with the older girls and the smaller girls have their own room
Switch the 2 little girls into the big girls room. Move the 13/10 in the big room with the 8 yr old. So she shares space/ has time alone w/o preschoolers.
Put a baby gate across the big kids rooms to keep the littles out
Move the two older girls in the room with her and give the 2 Littles the other room
Why not move the littles to their own room and put your daughter with the big girls?? You could move the big girls to the bigger room and put the little ones in the smaller room.
Could your bio daughter share a room with the 10 and 13yr old step daughters that way she has her own space and only shares when they are there plus they are older and wonât be as annoying as such as you get siblings are
putting an 8 year old with a 10 and 13 year old is not a good idea either , age gap, ect but if the older 2 are hardly there then i guess is fine
My son doesnât have a room at his fatherâs house to himself and Iâd never expect that of them. I have him pretty much all of the time unless theyâre able. Asking them to make sure they keep an empty room just for my child feels wrong id feel its taking away from your child too and your absolutely right she deserves her own space
I agree with the husband.
Yea move the 10, 13 and 8 year old into the larger split room and the 3 and 4 year old into the smaller room.
Move the 8 yr in with the older girls. She would have her own space when they arenât there and sheâs closer to their age and interests then the 3 and 4 yr old girls.
Put the 2 little girls in the big girls room n give the 3 older girls the big room she will have the room to herself most of the time n they wonât be to crowded when all 3 are in there
I would put the three oldest together. They are closer in age then her and the youngest. Edited to add⌠the two oldest girls arenât there but just in the weekends and special occasions. Maybe for the older girls you could find a locking knight stand or armoire that locks so the can feel they also have a sense of privacy.
Ummmm donât move the boys into a toddler girls room
Give the 8 year old her own room and the part timers will deal with it! They have their own room!!!
Put the 13, 10 and 8 year old in the same room. That way the 8 year old has her own space for the most part.
Put the little girls in the smaller room and put the 3 older girls in the bigger room so she has her own space most of the time
Why not move your 8 old in with the older 2 stepsisters. If theyâre not there all the time it would be like she has her own room most of the time and she wouldnât be in the room with the little ones.
I feel like you said it all in your post. She needs her own space. Older kids I feel isnât a good idea either I feel she is stuck in the middle. Older kids usually pick on younger ones. You know the right choice for your child. Go with it.
The fact that you are even worried about this shows your a considerate kind mum. No advice, just good luck.
Iâd put the 3 older ones together & the little ones alone. Or else the little ones will be all up on the 13 & 10 year old.
I would put the older girls in the bigger room
Why canât you just let the 8 year old sleep / escape to the girls room during the time they arenât there ?
Here is my opinion⌠which you asked for . I always get ripped for saying this but here goes
I have four kids. I live in a four bedroom apartment. My kids each have a room. I sleep on recliner in living room. My clothes are in closet in living room. When you become a parent. YOU SACRIFICE things for your kids.
If it means that much to you for her to have her own room⌠give up yoursâŚ
Itâs not fair for her to be the only kid with her own room. If the larger room is big just put up a decoder a
To make it seem like her ownâŚ
I have 4 kids at one point we have 5 people in a one bedroom apartment (my self 3 boys and a girl) then we moved in with my wife and had grandma and 4 kids in one room. My 2 older boys (20 & 18 now) never had their own room till they moved out. The 2 youngest now have their own room they are boy 14 and girl 13. I was a single mom for 11 years so ya kids donât need their own rooms just own space to get away
Move the 8 year old in with the older girls. She will have her own room part time, and share it when the step-sisters come, but she will still have her space away from the younger kids.
I agree with your husband. I was a child of divorce, and spent 2 nights a week at my Dadâs. I couldnât have cared less whether or not I had my own room or anything of that nature. When my younger brother was born, my bedroom was moved so he could have it. I was 9 and it did not phase me at all. That was my house 2 days a week, but it was his every day. He spent way more time there than I ever did.
Ask the oldest 2 about sharing a room with the 8 yr old!
Why would your 8 year old and ONLY YOUR 8 year old need their own room when NONE of the others have one to themselves?
Iâm with your Husband 
I feel like Iâm missing a kid somewhere.
5 step kids
2 older girls (13,10)
2 boys (15,9)
??
3 bio kids
All girls 8,4,3
Said 4 youngest girls:
Young step daughter?
Or the baby on the way?
Is the upcoming bundle a girl or boy?
So Iâve heard lots of people talking about where to move it, however Iâve not heard suggestions asking the older girls what they think of maybe sharing spaces. Iâd have a family sit down and see how everyone feels ( older children) and see if a solution doesnât present itself. By including them in the process they will feel like they have a say.
I agree with the husband. Itâs not their house full time
The rooms are big enough you can always put up a wall my father did that with me and my one older brother when we got older split them up if you can
I think you should move the 8yr old in with the 2 older daughters & have them in the biggest room.
So the 3&4yr old girls will have the older daughters old room.
Imo the oldest ones need their own space. Youngest ones should be good together.
Id switch the 2 step girls to the big room with the 8 year old and put the littles where the step girls were⌠then the three oldest girls share the biggest room and realistically that means the eight-year-old will have it alone sometimes and share with her big sisters the rest of the time
I would move the 2 older girls with her at the larger room and the 2 younger girls together alone in one room
I agree with your husband it is perfectly fine to do
Put the 8 year old with the 2 older girls so she has her own space when they arenât over
I Agree with the husband. I have 3 boys of my own and a stepdaughter who is rarely ever here. The 2 older boys have their own rooms. And my youngest boy sleeps with me still. My oldest has a bunk bed and when sheâs here she sleeps on the bottom.
I would put the little girls with the big girls
Give her her own room.
Move the 3 oldest girls into largest room and put the two younger girls in the big girls current room.
Definitely put the 8 yr old in with the older girls
Im a little confused here. You said 4 full time girls share a room ages 3,4,8. Is there a set of twins? Husband had 5 part time kids girls ages 10,13 & boys ages 9&15. Whereâs the 5th child?
I understand where youâre coming from. You want them to feel that itâs their home too. The reality though is that itâs only their home 4 nights a month. You have 2 rooms that arenât really being used while 3 or 4 girls are using 1 room. That doesnât seem fair to your full time girls, especially your 8yo. Your home is their only home. They have to share it with kids that donât even exist most of the time.
I would put the 8yo with the 10&13 yos so she has a room to herself for the most part & is basically has sleep overs with sisters closer in age 4 nights a month. You can do it really cute with a daybed with a trundle or a bunk bed with a futon for the older girls. That way she can have a couch when they arenât there & extra room for her friends to sleep over. Or you can put all the part time kids in the same room. Theyâre siblings, they can share a room 4 nights a month. Put hooks up on the ceiling & hang a curtain rod to seperate the genders if you wish.
Mabey you can consider a batch/sleepout in ya backyard for the eldest
Moving the boys in with the younger girls would not be an option. With that many kids, why would one child have their own room, while all other share? If the older two girls are only there every other weekend, that is literally 4 nights a month, I would have them share a room with the 8 year old. 26 nights a month, the 8 year will have her own room.
Do what is practical. The step kids having 1+ rooms between two residences and a child having .5 isnât really equal at all. Chat with them and have them be a part of the process.
Also, i wouldnât put the boys with the little girls.