Would you be okay with your man talking to a female friend all the time?

No ma’am that’s not okay

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At work oats fine but outside noooo

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No, I don’t think it’s ok. Don’t come at me. Lol. But I feel like one person ends up getting feelings or wants more. My husband also doesn’t believe you can just be friends with the opposite gender, we’ve actually talked about this before. Lol.

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Guess I’m the odd one out but my boyfriend and I both do not expect each other to give up our friends of opposite sex that we had before we got together. Were not married but we’ve been together over a year and now have a 3 week old daughter together.

Well I work with all guys because I’m the only female on the line in a shop full of mechanics, but if they are friends you should possibly meet her or invite her over for game night or something to ease your fears if she is actually just a friend. My fiance has no issue with it and I’m cool with him having female friends. Trust is a 2 way street gotta give a little to get a little

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Nope I met my bf because he was my friend at work. Lol

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I mean a man can be friends with a woman. If there’s nothing fishy and she respects boundaries then why not? Not all men are assholes and not all girls are sneaky. Have you met her, would you feel at ease if you met her? Communication is key. If he’s being open about the fact that their friends then there does t seem to be anything he’s trying to hide from you. He shouldn’t have to pay for what happened to you in the past, but as long as he’s reassuring you then really what’s the problem

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First of all he wouldn’t dare be so stupid

My best friend is a man. Has been for 19 years. His wife didn’t like that we became close but after he deployed I watched their dogs when she wanted to go out of town and went over and took care of them when she’d have to work late and we became friends too. I am closer to him than her but she and I are friends. He never discusses their problems with me (if they even have any). Idk I don’t see anything wrong with having friends of the opposite sex as long as everyone is respectful of each other and never crosses any boundaries. Invite her over. You might make a new friend too.

No. Asking for trouble. He is taking time away from you all as a couple. No other non related female outside you two should take up that much of his time. Affairs start with conversation!!! If you feel uncomfortable about it, then it needs to stop. He should respect how you feel and stop it.

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Thats called emotional cheating

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Not good work should be enough time to talk

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Sure! Most of my friends are men. My boyfriend has zero issues with that because we talk about where I’ll be and what I’m talking about with them. He has my phone password but never uses it (I have his too but have zero need to look). If you are in a secure relationship there isn’t any reason for insecurity.

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Don’t trust it. Any female friends with your man don’t wanna be friends. I learned that the hard way🤷‍♀️

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No absolutely not…unless all you are friends…even then id be uncomfortable with it

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Omg!! Why can’t males have female friends?? Seems you have some insecurities you need to work through. If it’s innocent why should there be a problem?

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Most of these comments are terrible. If he hasn’t given you a reason to distrust you so far then give him the benefit of the doubt. Idk about the question she asked though. And did you find out on your own? Or did he tell you? If he told you then that’s him communicating which is good. It would be worse of you had to find out on your own.

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I feel like you already know its excessive and her asking that adds an extra layer of no

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It would be fine with me. A lot of my friends are guys so that would make me a hypocrite if I had an issue. I wouldn’t be with someone I couldn’t trust.

Hang in there girl, I’ve had a few men cheat, and I’ve now found a very good man, and thank the Lord he has hung in while I learnt to trust again. Not saying that those feeling doesn’t slip up from time to time but a lot better. We’ve just had our sixth year together.

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I’m ok with it .
You said it … you have insecurities… these are yours and not his .

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She was probably asking him if you know about their conversations in order to make sure you are OK with it. I work with mostly men and talk to several of them frequently, outside of work. You’ll never find anything in our conversations that their spouses would get upset over. It all depends on what the context of their conversations is. If he would be uncomfortable letting you read it, there’s probably something funny going on.

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I think the fact she asked that is odd. And if he was the one who cheated on you previously hell no!

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There’s no problem with having appropriate friendships with the opposite sex although since she asked if you knew it sounds like she either felt guilty or weird about it. If it feels wrong then it probably is. :woman_shrugging:t2:

My fiancé talks to his female friends daily. My ex was cheating on me with who “I shouldn’t worry about.” So I know what you mean.

Dang so many insecure women. Why can’t one have friends of the opposite sex? I have Male friends and it’s cool maybe you don’t trust yourself is the reason why you don’t trust your mate.

I have male friends I talk to throughout the week. :woman_shrugging:
Some are gay, some aren’t.
My husband knows better.
I will say, the fact she asked means she doesn’t want you to me shocked. I don’t have male friends & their significant others don’t know me.

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I wouldn’t be ok with it.

Invite her to lunch the 3 of you get to know each other. have a 3some

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Hey at least she’s asking if you know they talk that much BUT like you I would feel the same way. I’ve always been cheated on so I wouldn’t trust anyone.

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female friends can exist. if she’s being treated the same or better than you she’s not a female friend and your partners a dck.

Is he the one that cheated on you? If so then I would discuss limits with him. If not then you can’t hold what another man did against him. I have male friends and that’s all they are. It is possible to have friends of the opposite sex . You can’t tell him who he can and cannot be friends with. He’s an adult and you can’t control him. If someone is gonna cheat their gonna do it regardless and trying to control who they are friends with isn’t going to stop them. If you don’t trust him then there’s no need to be in a relationship with him. If you not trusting him is because of past relationships then that’s something you need to work out and maybe try therapy for or you’re gonna make yourself miserable as well as ruin your relationship

Nope! Been there, don’t that with an ex, it didn’t end well :weary:

Women are conniving point blank period! I’ll always trust my man but do not ever put it past a woman to have a alternative motive especially if she asked that question! Cause she knows 100% she wouldn’t be good with it! Shut that ish down make your presence known!

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Don’t let the other cats drink from your bowl! Hells noooooo

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Ha ha ha ha no. If he’s ok with me chatting it up with homeboy everyday. Cuz I play eye for an eye :eyes:

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Nope. Not okay with me!!! Work should be work and personal life kept personal. Neither of them should mix and it would NOT be okay if my fiancè was talking to ANY other female friend without me being a part of the conversations too.

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Get to know her! Maybe you’ll find a new friend in her as well

If you told him it bothers you and makes you feel bad and he continues than make a deal. Because my boyfriend and kids father of 9 flippin years was doing that and i told him it hurts my self esteem and he continued and he was sleeping with her. He told me and i decided to try to work it out for the kids and it was going great till he was hanging out with her in my home when i got home from work one day. Hes known me since middle school tho and had recently started talking to her. So since he valued his friendship with her over my feelings i should have known better. Im stupid tho so now were just co parenting. And guess who is still hanging out and talking to her. Im a joke

No woman would be ok with it not even the one talking to your man would be ok with it but the fact is, because she’s the one talking to your man that makes ok :joy::rofl:

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Haha my ex did that twice. And left me for both of them. So no I wouldn’t be ok with it again

Nope! Will end badly

I’m honestly surprised by these answers. My husband is absolutely allowed to have female friends. I’ve also been cheated on but my past relationship traumas aren’t his fault. If you don’t trust your current partner, then they shouldn’t be your partner. Work on healing your own insecurities.

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Co workers and friendship at work stays at work. After work, that’s your time. Why is it he needs to talk to her about life or whatever he talks about when it should be with you. So no its not ok

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Why does he need to “play with fire”?

Mine does. But, I also have male friends I talk to. Not an issue for us.

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Hmmm that was odd of her to ask. She knows he’s married and wants to know if it’s ok with you. Call her up say hell no! If he goes running to her there’s your answer. He may be bugging the hell out of her and she’s putting up with it cause of work? If I but nope…you won’t know till you ask

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Would he be ok with you talking to a dude everyday?

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Nope. Not at all. I’m sorry but my man is mine, and that goes for his attention also. :rofl::joy:

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Of she had to ask if you knee there right then it became a problem

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I talk to other guys without issues :woman_shrugging: I don’t go to any other levels than friendship with them. You have boundaries. Don’t pass those boundaries. I click with men better than women.

One of my best friends was a guy (and also an ex) i was always up front and honest with hubby. He never had an issue with it

Ask to get to know her. Invite her over have a bbq or dinner. It gives you a chance to see how they are in public and private settings. Trust is a big deal! My fiancee has female friends and he knows I’ll ask about them and a lot know he is loyal so I never worry. But if she is asking clearly there was issues before you between him and another involving her. Maybe she doesn’t want to cross boundaries.

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No… I would not be ok with it :woman_shrugging: He doesn’t need any female friends like that… he’s got me, If im not enough , If he wants that… then go… see ya!

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Why are you feeling insecure about him having a friend of the opposite gender? Are you getting your needs met in your relationship?

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In this situation? Nope.

If they are both being up front then they are truly just friends. Humans all make choices and there is nothing you can do to stop that but maybe try getting to know her too then you have more opportunity to assess the situation and you may end up with a friend as well. If you have trust issues your in the wrong relationship. My husband has plenty of female friends as I have male friends you dont choose who your friends are because we all connect with people we are meant to. I trust my hubby 110% as he trusts me 110% of that’s not where your level is at then you need to step back and figure out if this is right for you period. Make an agreement like we did if there ever comes a point in time your not happy tell me and we can fix it or move on to other things its that simple. Set boundaries and if they are crossed then you walk away but if your needs are met and you are happy then stop looking in the rearview mirror at what has happened and look forward to what can be. Every relationship is different but they all take work and sacrifice and if you judge him by your past relationships and hurts your doomed to fail everytime he is not your past he is your future

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Ok maybe she asked to see if he was hiding their friendship to see what kind of man he is and to see how he was expecting the relationship to be. Some women ask this question to see the integrity and loyalty of the man to their partner. If your man tells you he talks to this female friend daily and doesnt hide the fact that he talks to her or what they talk about and doesnt hide his phone or delete convos and you know all about this work chick you dont have anything to worry about in my opinion maybe you should befriend her. But if you make it an issue they will start hiding things and an issue will happen and then your relationship will crumble because of your distrust. Trust is a big deal. You dont trust him to begin with then there is no reason for him to try to maintain any trust period.

There are alot of emotionally secure woman on our beautiful earth. I am not one of them. I’d say no. I wouldn’t be ok with it.

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Yes if they were friends from high school I think that is fine. You would see them at the high school reunion.

I feel like her asking is a form if respect tbh

I wouldn’t be okay with all the time. If we were all chill, that’s one thing. But I don’t even talk to my best friends as much as they sound like they talk and I’m a super social extrovert.

Would they be having the same conversations if you were around them?

It is odd that she asked, but you need to be open with your partner about how it makes you feel. His reaction will give you your answer.

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Well since she said it I guess it’s a lot so no , especially if it makes you uncomfortable , he should consider your feelings.

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Its a huge risk to take. I know so many relationships fall apart because the man (or woman) gets attached to a coworker.

Yes. Men can be friends with women. Women can be friends with men. I have guy friends and there is zero attraction to then because they are just friends :woman_shrugging:t3:

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Women that are friends with my husband have to be my friend too. So if you both don’t talk to her then it’s fishy. My husband will introduce us and then it’s not fishy.

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I’m no where insecure at all… but if my man is giving another woman more attention than he is me. We all gonna have problems. I know what I bring to the table and if he thinks it’s ok to disrespect me with other females. His table gonna be empty

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If there is no trust then do you really have a relationship? If someone is going to cheat they will do it no matter the circumstance. That’s just my opinion.

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I mean if she asked that I’d find it suspicious

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friend sure but talk daily? NO. for what?

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My best friend decided to be friends with the guy I was seeing and the second we split they got together so I’d say absolutely not. If your best friend can do it then anyone can

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I think he is thinking friend. But she is hoping to stir shit. Start talking to her on the phone too! Tell him u would like to meet her. U r always up to making new friends. Make ur presence known. :wink:she won’t be able to bring her a game if you’re a daily part of the conversation. Good luck

My husband does not have female friends at all, which is what I prefer honestly. My 1st BD was still best friends with literally all of his ex’s and he slept with every one of his female friends but they remained friends… it was the worst relationship I’ve ever been in :joy: I’m not about that life anymore.

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My suggestion is get to know her…
I think that actually seeing them interact will help you decide one way or another.

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I have a male best friend that also has a friendship with my husband and who also was in my wedding. I think it depends on the relationship between you and her.

That is how my ex started. Becoming best friends with his mate’s wife. And then you know the rest of the story!
He left me for her…… best thing ever happened to me!!!

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Befriend her as well. If you still have a bad feeling about it, talk to your boyfriend

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I’m best friends with 2 of my male coworkers (same department, 1 is married to his HS sweetheart and 1 is dating another one of our coworkers) and i date my SO of 4yrs, who is also my coworker (met at work but work in different departments). My man is fine with me being 100% just friends with my guy coworkers. Just depends on the guy and how he perceives the situation and if he has trust… Same if roles were reversed. Not saying you don’t trust him/her but that’s kinda a weird statement to make. Could be pure innocent…?

You must be dating my ex…

Maybe get you a friend and see how he reacts.

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My best friend is a male and he is in a relationship practically married but hes not. We have been best friends since high school and i have seen him in a few different relationships but I always ask are you sure she’s ok with us talking all the time. I always ask cause I dont want to cause any trouble for them. They have been together the last 9 years and she Finally reached out to me and said I know he talks to you a lot and no I dont have any problem with it. You all been friends for years and you never gave me any reason not to trust either of you. So I am good you dont need to worry. I think maybe That’s what the female meant. At least that’s how I always meant it. I hope that helps you out a little.

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Well me personally I’m not comfortable with my man having female friends. It’s a really huge risk and a lot of times relationships fall apart because of it. Not because the guy cheats with this female but just because of the jealousy. I’m just not the kind of person that would tolerate this. If you’re the kind of female that allows this and you don’t have a problem with it more power to you but I have seen the way these things have ended up and I don’t wanna be a part of that

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Maybe, befriend her. She could mean no harm. She could have asked that because she wants to make sure you’re okay with it and not cause problems between the two of you. Don’t be so quick to judge and say something is going on. I have a male best friend and we talk every day…well send memes every day.

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All my friends are men and the colleagues in my department too, sometimes I talk to them and it is not because nothing is happening, I love them all as friends but it is not to be talking to them all the time or daily, there is something That does not add up to me, if it bothers you, you should talk it over with your boyfriend and explain why, no friendship relationship should be above the couple, if it really is friendship, that much talk could lead to something more.

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We’re they friends before you met him? If so, I’d say they are just friends.

If not, I’d say any contact that’s not work related is inappropriate.

The exception to the rule would be if she has a significant other, and all non-work related contact involves all 4 of you.

My mother in law told me years ago … singles and doubles don’t mix. I laughed at her at the time, thinking how old fashioned she was And that times had changed. She was right.

Single people don’t have anything in common with couples, and don’t have any reason to be hanging out with one of, or both, partners. It’s unfortunate, but truly, your best friend when you’re in a relationship should always be your partner.

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Depends on what they are talking about I guess I mean if it’s work then it wouldn’t bother me but if it was intimate stuff… Yeah no

I think maybe you should be on your own until you can trust people again. You will wind up creating a toxic environment for you and him. If you stay together try and remember …It’s his co-worker and friend try to be friends with her to, put in an honest effort :relaxed: I really wish you the best with this.

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Talk to your man about these concerns. See what feedback he provides you with. Can he validate your feelings and make you feel more secure in anyway? Will he set firmer boundaries and prioritize your relationship to make you feel secure? Can you befriend the girl to also feel more comfortable with his friendship? Friendships with the opposite sex can be normal/healthy but are definitely risky. You guys should be able to communicate openly about attraction/temptation to other people and how to manage those normal feelings to better prioritize each other!

I have a male friend and my husband has been with me to a few of his events, but I don’t know how I’d feel if he had female friends. All he had in high-school was friends that are female and they see him randomly and say hi, that’s about it.

I better be my man’s best friend :ok_hand:t2:

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Listen if you don’t feel comfortable you need to talk to him. Out of respect for you he should not talk to her if you are uncomfortable.

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If you don’t have trust then you don’t have anything. Not judging. I feel trust is the foundation of any relationship. I would never tell my significant other to stop talking to someone. I wouldn’t want it done to me. Of course let your feelings be known but if you have to question it then walk away. Just my opinion. Hope everything works out well for you.

The fact that she’s asking him if you know how much they talk tells you that she’s aware that there’s something beyond social friends that he’s putting across to her. She’s asking him to clarify that you know what’s going on and that you’re ok with it. She’s far more thoughtful and sensitive than he is and is probably trying to decide how far she wants to let him go with his excessive “friendship” towards her. Sounds like she does not want to be the other woman, do anything behind your back or have you left looking stupid. The fact that you’re seriously questioning his over the top friendship and it’s making you feel leery and sending up red flags tells you the answer to your question.

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My problem with this post is that you probably have a male friend. Why can’t he have a female friend? Opposite genders can be friends. My best friend is a male. He introduced my husband and I. You can’t be in a serious relationship if you can’t trust.

It ain’t fittin’… it ain’t fittin’. It jes’ ain’t fittin’… It ain’t fittin’.

Dont know what to say, but if he is chatting with her, in your company, and not communicating with you, yes its a problem. Having to keep yourself occupied while he is chatting away would be a red flag. Have you ever met this lady. Invite her over, you will immediately feel if there is more to the friendship.

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I think if you are questioning it, then you have answered your question yourself

Hell yeah I’d be ok with it
I don’t want to talk to his ass daily :joy: so at least someone else will
I will never understand why what’s between someone’s legs determines if they or your partner are trustworthy

Not me lol I don’t play that mess

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