This is just another example of why tipping is wrong.its not tbe customers responsability to make sure any employee is paud enough.
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Not in nz we don’t really tip anyone at all not waitresses or cleaners no one.
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He needs to learn important social cues. If the service was bad, ok… but if he “forgot” that’s not the waiters fault and they make nothing.
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Idgaf she was completely in the wrong and way way over the line. Whether or not he forgot to tip is irrelevant you do not ever go out to a customer and demand to be tipped. Not only is this extremely unprofessional but it’s crossing a big line and personal boundaries. A tip is not something you are expected to get it is exactly what it is a tip for good or excellent service. I am absolutely appalled by her actions and she needs to be reprimanded by her boss. Some can’t afford to tip and some can regardless a waiter or waitress should never be demanding a tip from a customer. I always try to give something but if it was bad service or attitude then I don’t and if a employee demands I tip them they are getting absolutely nothing and I am going to there boss to have a chat about this because it’s unprofessional and disrespectful!
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How rude of her to confront him.
Come to NZ we don’t expect to be tipped 
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Contact that restaurant!!
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People forget, the waitress shouldn’t have assumed. That’s unacceptable, behavior I would have just went on with my work.
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!!! Should of talk to the manager !!! Does she approach every customer that eats up in that restaurant like that how disrespectful
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Your being over protective, you said he is 18 that makes him an adult and capable of dealing with his own problems with out his mom getting involved. Yes the waitress should not have confronted him on the issue, but I feel the best way to deal with social anxiety is to have to deal with situations like this on your own. As a man it’s actually very embarrassing to have your mother try to step in and deal with stuff like this for you
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Unprofessionsl,rude , inappropriate and uncalled for.Servers should psiid minimum wage in the first place.Some places do not even get the tip you put on the bill.A server from a very nice place told me some restaurants divide all the tips evenly.Aftet hearing that I began leaving money for service
We don’t tip in NZ so not sure about that one sorry our minimum wage is around 20 dollars a hour hope your son ok
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You know i think if you recived good service then leave a tip…thats the job they choose but she was wrong to go out side and confront him like that…God Bless him 
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Report her she should be fired
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Nope I’d contact the restaurant that’s just unprofessional on the waitress and generally could probably be fired
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i’m a waitress and there’s plenty of people that dont tip. although I’m unhappy about it, I most definitely do not confront them about it. and the fact is, he forgot. it wasn’t intentional. he was nice enough to go back and tip after that
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This happened to me as and adult and I was livid! I always tip but if the server is bad and rude they can forget it! That was the case the day it happened to me! I can’t imagine how your poor son felt! Tell him not to feel bad. Also tell him that he should feel very good about himself for doing the right thing!
Wow she definitely wouldn’t have gotten a tip had she confronted me and demanded a tip! Tips are based on service! If you are not a good waitress you don’t get a tip! Tipping is not required!
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She honestly should be fired for that.
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Should be reported to management. Very unprofessional. Totally get the wage problem of wait staff. That’s why I say pay wait staff appropriately and forget tipping all together.
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She was the rude one
Not him
I used to waitress for years along with being a bartender. I would of never ever done this. Does it suck to miss out on tips sure but wow. Thats just me personally I woulda never done that.
my friend works in the food service he’s a waitress and from the stories he tells me, they deserve their tip.
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Ok so tips are NOT required. Regardless of if it was an honest mistake, that waitress had NO right to accost him and DEMAND something he is NOT obligated to give her!! Customers CHOOSE if they want to tip or not, it’s not a requirement to dine! She needs her ass cussed out and her manager contacted to make him aware of her behavior.
It is never acceptable for and waitress to confront a person about a tip, but I understand that they make very little money in this profession that is why you need to get a better job, a tip is for how you feel about your service not about anything else legal, truly you don’t ever have to tip it has become regular because people know that they don’t make much, but you just never confront a customer, I would talk with the manager about the situation and explain your son situation she aleast need to take responsibility for her actions, I have had bad service and still left a tip but I also have had great sevice and over tipped then I know when i go back to ask for a personal waitress. I pray for everyone in this world because we all need to love one another then this world would be a better place to live. .
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She is definitely wrong!
I have only ever educated people on tipping in the US. And only if they seem taken aback by the concept. BUT in the US, it is an unspoken rule. You do need to tip. Personally I tip after based on service. Using the example of a coffee shop (since i work at one)…. I even appreciate the change. It literally be 2 cents. Don’t make me bring you only pennies, that’s annoying. Even with change split between 3 workers I will make your coffee as quickly as possible with a huge smile. Tip me more than 2, I will remember you. If you order the same thing everyday, that will be ready as soon as I see your car pull up. Because you are an amazing human. Come every day, order the same thing, never tip? You will wait in line, order, have your ticket hung up, and we will get to it ASAP. Because you don’t owe me anything and I don’t owe you. You get the same service and treatment as everybody else. But as somebody making less than minimum wage, I am working for tips. I recently went back to a job after 6 years. I still remember the orders of the good tippers that still come in. Because I actually cared. While I always try to make everything perfect (I would never screw up an order simply because lack of tip) I have no doubts if you tip better your order is better. “Made with love” type of concept really. Leave a good tip, and I might not charge you for the extra shot You asked for after i rung you up. Don’t tip, and you definitely have to pay for that. Im even nice, and give everybody the benefit of the doubt. But seriously after ive served you múltiple times with no tip, you are just a person and nothing more. I still hope you have a fabulous day. 
On another note, if everybody tipped .50 cents at my job, I’d easily make $20 an hour. They start a $7 I believe. I don’t see any reason everybody shouldnt tip their change at the very least.
BUT to answer your question, unless asking the waitress and having an open conversation it shouldn’t ever be mentioned. At my job if you pay with a card we are required to ask to process the payment, then we have to make them give us the amount, there is no discretion. And it is the worst feeling to see the annoyance and to see the obligation they feel. It’s shitty all the way around. Being forgetful is easily forgiven, but I wouldn’t go back after that experience if I were him because - rude!
I think this situation is more of a learning experience. I bet now he’ll always tip lol. Weather it’s a little or a lot. Not saying the waitress was in the right. Just saying that we learn from our mistakes. No need for mama bear to get involved.
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I’d contact the restaurant and complain about her cause that’s bs. No one HAS to tip and she was completely unprofessional and didn’t even deserve for your son to go back and tip her
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TUHHHh. If that were mine. I’ll be paying her a personal visit. Then I would contact HR
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Hold the restaurant accountable they should be paying wait staff properly to were we shouldn’t be required to tip
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That’s crazy I’d be mad!! Call that restaurant, it’s sad we have to pay for a meal pay for our drinks and seating and then STILL PAY a person to work. If she has a problem with minimum wage she should get a better job
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Nope thats not ok, dont confront customers.
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itnis absolutely 100% not acceptable to do that at allm i wpulda told uer to fuck off anf then asked for a manager. and then still left no tip!
It’s not that it’s normal or not that’s just rude !
Tips aren’t mandatory. She was wrong. Period. Instead of harassing guests she ought to be harassing her employer to pay a living wage. Even tipped workers deserve to be paid a living wage, the tips should be a bonus.
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Contact the restaurant. As a former waitress this is beyond unacceptable and just plain rude. Its asking for money that isn’t yours. Whether a customer tipped or not, I was getting paid in the end. Contact and ask to speak to the manager
Id get your son to contact the restaurant and complain. Whether he tips or not is up to him. Waitress had no right to call him out like that and ill bet she wouldn’t have done it to a more confident older adult .
Please encourage him to do it himself. My son is older with social anxiety and it breaks me to see him suffer before dealing with something but im not going to be there forever and he is improving…so will your son.
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My daughter is a manager in a restaurant she worked her way up from hostess to server and now manager. I totally get that server’s pay is the worst and they survive on tips BUT they choose that job and knowing the pay so if one person doesn’t tip, I get being upset about it but I can guarantee that if any of my daughters staff did this they would be fired on the spot. Your son needs to call and ask for management and explain what happened and you need to let him deal with it.
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Hmm… on the receipt it ask tip space that’s when if you want to leave a tip on the card. Tell your son don’t go back to the restaurant. Also explain to him that he should tip if the service is good, if it’s bad don’t tip and let the manager know about service.
People forget and yes it’s upsetting that she called him out on it when he honestly forgot and I feel terribly for him, but at the same time, I’ve been a server. So many people out there who eat out, want refills on drinks and ask for a ton of things, then when they leave, they pay the check and feel like they’re making a statement about having to “pay the waitresses wages when it’s the restaurant’s responsibility” by refusing to tip.
I’ll be honest, I work a job now where I’m paid more than a living wage, am able to afford my car payment, bills and mortgage on my own and raise 3 kids…… and rarely do I ever work as hard in a day as I did when I was a server. Yet there is a growing population of people who literally refuse to tip on the grounds that they don’t want to pay the wages of a business owners employees.
I’ve never called a person out for not tipping but I’ve had days where I’ve come close because several tables stiffed me, despite my hard work and literal sweat to meet all of their needs.
So I look at it this way, if you or your son had a job where the person doing payroll consistently paid you less than when you should have gotten paid, you’d bring it to their attention right? Same thing goes for servers in a restaurant. If you go out to eat, you’ve JUST hired a personal servant to be at your beck and call for the next hour or so. You shouldn’t forget to pay them for doing so. Because like the system or not, tipping a server is not a “thank you for a job well done”, it’s written in as a part of their wages. It’s how they are paid.
Servers make LESS hourly than minimum wage, tips are their wages. The $2.33-$5.00/hr (ish) wages that a typical server is paid hourly is more for paying income taxes on what they make in tips (either by what servers claim in tips or if the restaurant just “assumes” their tips and deducts taxes….generally averaged out as 10% of their total sales for the pay period) covers mostly income tax… there is not much left to fill your gas tank to get to work for a week….
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I’m embarrassed for that server 
I’m a server and I would NEVER confront a customer about a tip! Totally unprofessional. Yes we count on tips because our hourly rate is only a couple bucks however tipping is still optional!!!
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We usually too 25 % or more
Nope. Rude waitress. No tip. Bad service. No tip. And its not required and because she made a remark about getting no tip. Unprofessional. She gets no tip. You choose a minimum wage job you get minimum wage pay 
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Over protective mama servers don’t make much in wages they depend on tips to make their pay ck so if people forget to tip it really hurts
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I waitressed from when I was 18 until 25 in between school, between the years 2007-2013 tipping is not required and yes it sucks and is not fair and you get frustrated when people don’t tip because in actuality your tips are your paycheck, but once again it’s not required so she was out of line to do that, and if you’ve been a server you kind of expect whose gonna tip and whose not, plus you can’t expect to make a living off of waitressing in today’s cost of living without struggling, it’s gonna happen with the pay scale, but bullying people into tipping will definitely make it harder for you, whose to say other customers didn’t hear her or if y’all tell a bunch of people, I honestly don’t understand why they don’t just raise the hourly pay for waitstaff, most restaurants you’re paying $8 for a burger and fries anyway if you raise the prices of food to like what $0.50 on each menu item it would offset the cost, idk if that’s accurate but it should be looked at
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Tipping is based on service in my opinion. She probably was a good waitress, However asking someone for a tip? No. There are days when you can pay your rent in tips and there are days you can buy a roll of toilet paper. She was wrong to even ask, he was wrong to not tip. That’s not something you forget. It’s not his first dinner in a restaurant, he should’ve known better. But to chase the kid out? She would’ve got a huge laugh from me! And not a tip either.
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She could have asked him if there were a problem with the service she provided…if he said no then explain the gratuity thing. Some people honestly dnt get how that works. But just demanding a tip…nah not cool.
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Well hopefully he learned his lesson and won’t forget to tip again
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I’m a server. Never would I have ran after a customer demanding anything. I get a lot of teenagers that come in, and ya they aren’t the first table I would love to serve because of that reason. But I do it and treat them like any other customer and continue on with my day. As a person who works in customer service and relies on tips to pay my bills, it’s my job as a parent to teach my kiddo how to tip and what it means. Your son is not in the wrong! The server should have never gone after him like that. And if someone did that to my boy, I would be livid. But I would use that experience as a lesson and teach him how he should tip based on the service he received.
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Tipping is optional. It isn’t required. And before anyone comes for me, I always tip 20% or even more. It was pretty rude for the waitress to come after him and guilt trip him.
Tipping isn’t the law. She was wrong for calling him out. He paid for his meal and that’s it.
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That is ridiculous! I wouldn’t have gone back in because of how the waitress acted! To demand anything from a customer is just insane to me! He should not beat himself about it.
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I flat REFUSE to leave a tip when paying with my card as there is too much room for error when adding the tip on. I will leave cash on the table for our wait staff. I have had someone chase me out of a restaurant because she didn’t take the time to see the $30 I left for her. I marched right back in to our table, picked up the tip, and left. Never have been back.
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The problem is they will not fire her! They can’t get help! So many places can’t even open, No Waitresses! There is a extremely busy place where you probably make big bucks and are offering 10 hr plus tips and still can’t get anyone to waitress! It’s a sucky job and unless they’re getting better money Why should they?
I don’t believe waitresses are entitled to a tip. When I was coming up a tip was called a gratuity. It was something you gave in appreciation for good service. Greedy restaurants that don’t want to pay their employees decent wages have made it the responsibility of their customers do pay their employees. What was considered a reasonable tip has increased from 10 to 20 percent. That being said I base my tip on the service I get. I also take into consideration how busy the restaurant is. If very busy and I feel like the server is doing their best they get a good tip. I have on rare occasion not given a tip for over the top bad service. I imagine a waitress that would call out a customer is probably not the beat waitress.
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I’d slap a waitress.
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I don’t leave a tip if the service was bad. If the service was great, I leave a big tip. I know a man who requested to talk to the cook and gave him a big tip because the food was great. He left nothing for the waitress because the service was bad.
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n I see what ppl are saying, or how they view it. But think about the restaurants and places already having a hard time hiring? So if all these ppl serving are told to “ just get another job” then I guess society will really see how affected the business can be by nobody working there anymore. Which trickles down to us having no where to have a night out for food and drinks. Unless they want to only be served by highs school and college students as workers. Either way the restaurant business isn’t going To change the tipping . They will just start hiring the only ppl applying which would be the youngsters. So most likely your service will go down Bc of the inexperienced workers. But I guess the benefit to that would be, at least you won’t have to tip anymore. But prob would have less options on where to have a night out. I just keep thinking of all these struggling restaurants now, and how they can’t stay open normal hours. If everybody who worked for tips would “just get another job” then we would all be limited on our idea of a night out.
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Waitresses usually don’t make minimum wage. It’s usually between $2. to $3. unless the pandemic changed it. They do depend on tips. But she had no right confronted your son no matter what. Everyone does not tip I know because I have worked as a waitress but that is totally up to the person. I always try to leave a tip but if your a terrible waitress it want be much. I wouldn’t have given her anything if she had hunted me down and said that.
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If she pulled that on me she definately would not have gotten a tip.
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Whats the restaurant called?
I would call the restaurant and talk to a manager that is totally un exceptable. I tip everywhere we go. But tipping or not and how much is up to the customer. In no way should she have said anything to your son about him not tipping
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The waitress was in the wrong a tip is not mandatory or it would be included in the bill not an empty spot on the ticket. I would contact the restaurant. Waiters and waitresses choose to be in that line of work… im sorry but they do if they dont like what they make then they need to look for another job. I get how its difficult and they have to split tips and get taxes taken out of card tips etc but again tips are not mandatory she was out of line. Your son shouldnt have gone back and left one in my opinion just because she did that to him and not in a nice way. I would have told her well i initially forgot but now that you were so rude about it im not tipping. She could have come up to him and said sir you left the tip area blank would you like me to strike this through or something like that… there are more tactful polite ways to say hey you didnt tip me without being rude to the customer. I usually tip cash and hand it directly to my waitress so they can put it right in their pocket.
Waitress was wrong. She did it because he was obviously young. Me, I wouldn’t have given her any tip after that.
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That shit is not normal. It’s rude. Tips are not expected. It’s a courtesy. I have had servers ask me if there was a reason I was tipping so small. She asked if it was something she needed to improve on. So I gave her an honest opinion about the service and tipped her a 20 cause she was asking if she could have feed back on what to improve. The meal was just between my husband and I. I have worked as a server. I know the painstaking tasks and work it takes to be a decent one. I myself have done parties of 40+ people and only got $1. So I get it. But too many servers expect it. When it’s not required.
I would always tip no matter what. But to run after somebody to ask for tip??? It’s definitely a NO!!!
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Yeah I would have laughed and told her I completely forgot, but she definitely wasn’t getting a tip after that. Totally inappropriate. Your poor son.
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Waitress should have said something, if he’s 18, hopefully the embarrassment taught him a life-long lesson.
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Waitress was way out of line!! I’d let her boss know what she did. Very unprofessionall. How would she know if her service just sucked
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Although I do want to back that up with, and restaurant I have worked for has it in their paperwork that it is a fire able offense if you were to confront any guest about their tip! So that person was def in the wrong for confronting your son. It never has been allowed in any restaurant through the years I’ve worked for. It’s a number one no-no. And that server prob knew that too. So they deserve to be told on for that behavior.
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A tip should be just that…a thank you for good service and in recognition of the difficult job the service industry has. It’s damn rude to demand one! I would never go back, and he should complain to the manager.
Should ov told her not ur problem n if she don’t like it then she knows what to do 
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I’m afraid I would have had to bring this behavior to the attention of the manager. That waitress was totally out of line
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That waitress was 1,000% WRONG!! She should have just let it go, she had no right to do that to your son or any customer. I’ll bet she receives very few tips from the rest of her customers either. What a terrible attitude on her part. Everyone knows that food servers are underpaid. She made the choice to work there! She is working in the wrong field if she thinks that’s the way to handle this. Shameful behavior on her part! Quite honestly she could see that your son is very young–only 18!! He’s still a kid for God’s sake! Shaming him was totally UNACCEPTABLE. I give your son credit for going back and adding a tip onto his receipt. I wouldn’t have after that terrible scene the waitress caused! I would either tell the owner or never go to that restaurant again. Again, shame on that waitress! And no you are not being overprotective! If it happened to my own husband I would be mad.
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She was way out of line! She knew when she took the job what the pay was!
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I wouldn’t have tipped after she came out like she was owed one…
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I honestly wish none of you people saying servers don’t deserve your tips for waiting on you hand and foot, cleaning up after you and putting up with your stinky attitudes were ever allowed to step foot in a restaurant again. Go home and cook for yourself if you have a problem paying people who are paid to be your servant. Smh
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With her attitude you are not getting squat from me
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never heard of anyone ever doing that
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Call the restaurant and report her. I understand they only make X amount of money but you are never to confront a patron to ask for a tip… that’s why it’s called a tip and not gratuity. I say this but understand my daughter and best friend were waitresses. You don’t do that period
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It’s completely rude to go out in today’s day and NOT plan to tip your server.I waitressed for sixteen years and always was tipped.Sure there were some that didn’t tip AS WELL…but never had someone forgotten. There was one time someone forgot to pay the bill and I had to follow them out to the car and let them know because I didn’t want to end up paying their bill,yes they were embarrassed but it’s life and of course no one is perfect and we do forget things……
She was wrong but dont be that kind of momma. This situation didn’t warrent it. He’s got to Learn To be a man without you doing that… I feel ya tho. The momma in me would want to attack but for my sons sake ill refrain…
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Yeaaaaa, not a chance would I have tipped her after that. I understand that he forgot, however, tips are optional. I would absolutely report her actions to the restaurant
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That was so wrong of her to do that I would definitely call the manager or even stop in there she needs put in her place
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As a server myself, I agree that she was out of line. A call should be made to the manager! Sometimes a server will ask what was wrong with the service, so they can improve, which I still disagree with. If I get stiffed, I just move on. Good tippers usually make up for it. Kids stiff all the time.
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The whole thing is sad. Wages should cover her not tips. I’m Australian to give tips it’s for top shelf service
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Honestly, I’m not an employer, it’s not my responsibility to make sure you go home with enough money to pay the bills. If you can’t afford to have the job…get a second one or a different job. There’s no excuse for demanding someone who’s not employer to make sure you have enough money.
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- Your son is an adult. His choice to tip or not is not your concern. No action is required on your part.
- He didn’t “forget”. Credit card receipts are pretty universal. There’s a total, a blank line below that for you to enter the tip (with a label next to it telling you what to do), another blank line for you to total it (again, labeled) and then you sign the bottom (also, labeled). You usually get two. One for the restaurant, one for the customer. He had two opportunities to see what he was supposed to do. He’s an adult. If he can’t figure out a credit card receipt, I’m very concerned for his ability to function independently in the real world. Clearly, he figured out how/where to sign it. He didn’t “forget”. He just didn’t want to tip. Anxiety or not, minimum wage job or not, overbearing mom or not, he made a poor choice. Given the way this was handled (inappropriately), I can’t imagine it will be one he will make again.
- The server is absolutely in the wrong, as well. It is an unfortunate fact that tips are optional and really have no bearing on her performance at all. I can’t say that I agree with that. No one can live or support a family on $2.13 an hour. (That number may vary by state, but that’s the minimum and standard in mine.) That being said, the server had absolutely no right to chase your son down and demand money from him. I’m sure he was terrified and humiliated and I’m truly sorry he experienced that.
The world is in turmoil right now. Everywhere is struggling to hang on to/find employees. Employees are struggling to find employment that is both meaningful and financially efficient in relation to their time. Everyone is struggling to maintain their mental health. We have lost over a million souls in a year and a half. I would chalk this up to a learning experience for your son about the importance of “remembering” to tip our lowest paid employees. I don’t think calling a manager/getting her fired/being a Karen would add any goodness to the situation.
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I’d have not tipped her plus when I went back I’d ask for another waitress
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Completely out if line. The waitress needs brought to the managers attention. I might even go over his head and contact the owner of the business.
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She was most definitely wrong. Tell the restaurant about that, they need to know she behaved like that. Chances are she’s done it before and she’ll do it again to the next person if she’s not happy. Report her and maybe then if she gets fired she’ll be making no wage and learn she can’t act out like that.
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She was out of line…but if he paid with card there is a tip line…
Honestly since Covid I just started go going out to eat and yes I’ve forgotten a couple of times. I always remember after I’ve left and that’s the honest truth. 
Lmao if he had that much anxiety he would’ve left a damn tip
Ridiculous she should never did that I’d call manager
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I would call the restaurant and explain exactly this and ask the same question…what the hell type of people are they employing???
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This is an issue of the restaurant not paying their employees an actual living wage. If they were getting a living wage then they wouldn’t be forced to depend on tips.
He should tip but no most restaurants wouldn’t want her to confront him about it.
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Stop treating your son like a baby, he’s 18 he has to learn what’s except-able and what isn’t. If it were him who didn’t get tipped you would probably still be on here making a karen post.
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