My child is turning four in a few weeks and isn’t fully potty trained. He refuses to do a number two in a toilet and some days refuses to even use the toilet. I’ve tried being aggressive with it in the past (taking him every thirty minutes or so) and it made him hate it and backfired to the point where it took months to get him near the toilet. I’m letting him go at his own pace and it’s been working a lot better 
My daughter was addicted to pull ups one day when I was at walmart I let her go pick out her own under wear and after she picked out her own I told her those diapers are going bye bye cause she has big girl panties and she hated the potty chair so I out her on the regular toilet and she was potty trained in like 2 weeks I out those doggy pads under her sheet just in case she had an accident and didn’t give her anything to drink about 2.5 hours before bed
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Dont worry/care what anyone says. You do you. Your the mother and you know whats best for your child. If she is not ready then she is not ready. You will know when she is ready. Not like she will stay unpotty trained forever. Live everyday as it comes❣
What you should do is put her in big underwear and tell her she’s a big girl now that’s what I had to do with my daughter when she was 3 because she would not trained she wouldn’t even sit on the potty what you should do is put her in big underwear and tell her she’s a big girl now that’s what I had to do with my daughter when she was 3 because she would not trained she wouldn’t even sit on the potty as soon we put her a big girl underwear then she knew it was okay to go on the potty and I had her trained within a week
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Your not a bad mom, she’s being stubborn. My daughter was. She didn’t take interest till she was almost 4. Once she showed interest in going potty I jumped on board. Don’t stress yourself out over it♥️ it’s ok
My daughter is 2 years old. She uses the toilet when she wants to. I don’t force her, because like you said they will have zero interest. When she goes she gets rewarded. She’s used the bathroom 3 days in a row now. It’s not being a bad mom at all. Every child is different and every child has their limitations. Some want to wait a little bit and that’s perfectly okay. You’re mother in law is ridiculous. I say let ignore her, but I know that’s hard to do. Keep sticking up for you’re daughter.
Not a bad mom at all! Some things that helped encourage potty training for us was letting my daughter run around naked or just in panties. I move her potty chair into whatever room she is in and encourage her to try to go every 30 mins- hour. I make it fun by letting her put stickers on her potty chair, clapping when she tries and telling her what a big girl she is by using her potty. I also let her wipe herself so she feels independent. She loves it. Now she is trying to potty train me lol.
I wouldn’t force it just keep it fun and encouraging. Maybe take away the pull ups during the day and tell her what a big girl she is by wearing her panties! Don’t shame accidents she has just lots of back up panties, she won’t like the feeling of pee on her leg!
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Dont stress it. She will start to show interest when she is ready!
Personally I think it’s kind of ridiculous to have a three-year-old it’s not potty trained but it also depends on the situation, only reason my 2 1/2yo is only Half potty trained because he spends half his time at his dads house and his dad doesn’t try to potty train him (we have 50/50 custody). I’ve been trying to potty train him for the last year and he was doing really well until his dad stopped trying to help
I mean you’re not a bad mom though it’s just a little ridiculous to have a three-year-old still in diapers (pull-ups are still diapers)
Ughhh my daughter is 3 and refuses to potty train 
my mom makes comments on how i potty trained soooo early! 🤷🤷 not every kid is the same.
doesn’t make you a bad mom! leave the potty topic alone with your lo for now but get oh crap potty training & read it in the meantime. worked for us! the book also explains that it can possibly get harder & harder as they get older.
Dude, my 3 year old will be 4 in march and she’s been in underwear since last Thursday. She goes by herself and has had 3 accidents thus far. I prepared her but never forced her to potty train. It was all up to her.
My almost 3yo is not potty trained. He uses the potty when it suits him, but most of the time its in his diaper/pull up. I see it this way. I won’t be sending him to college in diapers so I’m not worried about it right now. He has the attention span of a peanut, so it will come when he is completely ready 
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Try letting her pick out some pretty under ware that she likes. Let her know she can’t wear them until she uses the potty. Try cloth diapers instead of pull ups. Disposable and pullups are way too comfortable and keep her feeling dry. If none of it works, I don’t know anyone who is an adult who is not potty trained and she will get there. Some of it may be because she was a preemie. Don’t allow your MIL to dictate your methods. If you do that you will spend the rest of your life giving in to her.
My 4 year old has only been potty trained for a few months. He did it on his terms
If you’re trying and it hasn’t happened don’t sweat it. My 5 year old still poops in his pants at school sometimes no matter what we do yet his twin brother doesn’t and my other 3 boys didn’t this long either. I suppose every kid is different. All you can do is try.
My sons pediatrician actually told me not to try to start potty training too early because it can be a stressful experience for both the child and the parent which may cause some regression. He was nearly 3 at the time. In my experience, no child potty trains before THEY are ready regardless of influence.
My son was not ready till about 4 years. We tried he resisted so we let it be for a few months they tried again, repeated this process a few times until he was receptive to it. When he was ready it actually went pretty smoothly. Force just makes more stress on you both. When she’s ready she’s ready. Every kid is different and just do what works for your situation… you are the parent and people can shove their needless mom shaming where the sun doesn’t shine cause they are not raising your kids.
Let me start with “you know your kid the best! Go with your gut instinct on things” only you know what will be right to do.
IF you are looking for suggestions on hopefully getting the ball rolling, I found that having a little potty chair just hanging around the house (it was new and unused for those moms that will scream “that’s unhygienic!”) for my little to play with and adjust to before moving it into the bathroom helped her get comfortable with it and sitting on it. She did not like the big potty at first. Also was super nice to take on road trips when we travel.
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My son took a while to potty train one thing that’s messy but helps … he had on some underwear and pullups and he didnt like being wet ao he got used to the toilet idea
My daughter is a former 30 weeker and she just turned 5 and is only using her little potty now she use to go at daycare and went once since she started kindergarten. Just do what you think is right for her. Your not a bad mom! I was told give them time and we just slowly got her to go too. Every child is different. We are trying to get her to sit in our one now.
My first kids was potty trained before 2, my 3rd kid will be too cause he loves to follow, but man my 3yo refuses to attempt, she is spoiled by the babysitters and lazy so… every kid is different
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If you genuinely ask yourself if you’re a bad parent, chances are pretty good you’re not.
You are not a bad parent! Pull ups are to muxh like a diaper it confises kids. Put her in panties and let her feel what its actualy like to have wet or poopy pants. Kids potty train at thier own speed. She will get it when shes ready.
Einstein wasn’t potty trained till the age of 12yrs old.
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Every child is different!
My niece was probably 4 when she stopped wearing pull-ups while the week of my granddaughter," 3rd bday, she started running to the potty.
Be consistent…please be patient.!
I potty trained all 3 of my kids at 4…it took a day max…they where understanding. N never messed a day or at night ever…just hang in there
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No! Potty train at your own and your toddlers pace. Every kid is different.
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my son is almost 3 (january) and he has NOT interest in training either.
Iv just started potty training my 3 year old, I put him in jocks no pants ( summer here) and just let him rock the day. He has accidents every now and then but dose really well majority of the time! I started when he was 2 but had to stop due to a high risk pregnancy
Both my girls weren’t potty trained until about 3 and a half. We had potty parties every time they went and got pretty new panties. My youngest would wear her panties over her pull-ups 
. When they were ready to it all came together. Keep the negativity out of your head. You’re doing what is best for you and your child! Good luck.
My oldest is going to be five in a few weeks. He showed no interest, nothing could get him to go or understand when he had to go until a few months ago when he just flipped like a light and started going all the time. (I did have him potty trained at 1 1/2 until a moron that is no longer in his life kept reversing it and telling him to just go in his diaper instead because he was too lazy to change him. Had a problem ever since until now) and my second is two and she’s started showing interest and trying to go. Every kid is different but forcing the situation will make you move backwards. It’s not your fault, some things just take time. You got this
Just take off the pull ups a go to panties cold turkey. The pull ups keep her too comfortable.
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I started potty training when she was 1yr 6 and at 1 yr 8 she stopped wearing pull-ups during the day but in the night she would because the bed would be wet until she started removing the pull-ups on her own I think she didn’t want them anymore
She needs to be potty trained…if you have a lil cousion or niece around her age or a yr or two older have them show her.my grandsons mom had him in pull ups till he was 5 because they had no one to teach him n he wasn’t interested in his potty chair or the toilet so finally 1 day wen he was here I had my other grandson whos 1 yr older to show him" I’ll be damn he learnd that day n started going on his own after that
My youngest wasn’t potty trained till he was 4. Exact same problem. I got him to potty train by the kid potty that looks like a real toilet. But my oldest was trained at 2. Your kids will decide, don’t force it. It’ll only scare them.
Just go at your own pace, every kid is different my son’s almost 2 and I just have him sit on the potty until he’s over it and wants to get up, and sometimes he grabs his seat and wants to sit on the toilet so he will for however long he wants, he’s barely peed a tiny bit in the toilet but I was so happy for him. Just be super excited for her when she sits on the potty even, might help.
We’re still trying to teach him how over here. It just takes time and patience. She’ll do it when she’s ready I never rush my son if he wants to he can if not that’s okay too.
So long as she’s sorted before school I think it’s okay, every kid is different. Mine has only just turned 2 and showing no interest whatsoever. He’s gone from getting his mat and wipes out and telling me he needs changing to happily sitting in his own filth and running away when I tell him he stinks. He’s back at nursery full time now so I hope he starts copying other kids and I have a little potty just in case he feels like trying it but that’s about it for now.
My son was terrified of the toilet and hated the multiple potty chairs so training him was a nightmare 
he refused every technique we could find until one day he just decided he was ready and that was it, he was trained with no accidents my daughter on the other hand is obsessed with the toilet and training her is already so much easier at 2, she’s practically training herself lol. She likes to take potty breaks with me and will sit on her little toilet next to mine. Kids are just different and do things their way, when they’re ready. Just keep trying but don’t beat yourself up over it.
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My girls refused to potty train. Until they started coming to the bathroom with me. I made a big deal about it being a big girls toilet. They soon wanted to be a big girl like mummy and started using the loo.
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Don’t stress… every child is different.
All you can do is keep trying 
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Bad mum no, Have you tried letting her be in real underpants and just letting her wet herself? They typically do not like the feeling of being solved so obviously and it tends to spur them on to use the potty provided. I’ve had 6 kids and never used pull ups and I would never advise people to, As you said it’s as good as a diaper, I’ve always gone straight to underpants, And after some initial refusal they tend to decide it’s better than feeling wet, Never go mad about accidents and always praise efforts.
then I’m a really shitty mom because my son is 2.5 and I haven’t even started 🤷🤷🤷 he ain’t interested and I’m in not damn RUSH to make my baby into a child. Sorry not sorry.
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My sons was 3.5 years when we starting proper potty training and still took a while to potty train him. Honestly don’t stress about. I think it’s an old fashion way of thinking that they should be trained early. Your her mother and know her best ignore your MIL xx
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All depends if child is ready. My daughter was trained shortly after her 2nd birthday. Every child’s different x
I put my daughters potty next to the big one and when I went it she went in also usually never sat on it till one day I went in she sat down and said me potty now. I’ve also let her when its nice out wear her bathing suit bottom around the yard eventually she didn’t like being wet. You do what is best for you and your family. Now if the child were older and not potty trained its be a different story.
Don’t stress yourself or your child. They will be potty trained before they graduate from high school.
They’ll do it when they’re ready. I used to get the same from my MIL because my husband and SIL were allegedly potty trained from 1yr old.
Stand your ground, everyone is ready at different times and we had 2 failed attempts before she ‘got it’ and when she did, she was dry day AND night within 48 hours.
My son was nearly 4 before he was potty trained. He was the same, just didnt want to.
My best advice is leave them without the pull up onat home. When she needs to go take her to the toilet/potty and make a fuss about how awesome she is for doin it. There may be quite a few messes, but she will get there. Kids will only do these things when they are ready. Dont rush her n dont worry about what anyone else says
My son didn’t want to go on the potty. He knew when he had to, he just didn’t want to. Eventually I just HAD it. I knew he had to go poo and literally sat him on his trainer potty and wouldn’t let him up until he went. 2 and a half HOURS of ear curdling screaming and a call to the cops by a neighbor later, he successfully went in that damn potty! He was soooo surprised at how much cleaner it was to poo in there than in his pull ups that he actually told me he was sorry he didn’t use it before! (He would gag and sometimes puke when I would change him. He still can’t pick up the dog’s poo w/o dry heaving. He’s 11 now.) He was just @ 3 at that time, if memory serves… The cops showed up right after his grand accomplishment, saw that all was well, chatted w/ me about their struggles w/ their little ones, wished me luck and went on their way. * To be clear, I KNEW he was going to poo the very second I let him up. He’s my hard headed one and he held that chit in, quite literally, for that long out of pure stubbornness.
I left it up to my kids on when they were ready, my boys were 3.5 and my daughter was 2, my mom said I wasn’t potty trained until I was 4. You’re doing okay mama❤
You are not a bad mom. You know your child better than anyone. If your child isn’t ready then good for your for not pushing her. Keep trying doing your best. Let all the others say whatever they want. Shield yourself from bad comments.
My son turned 3 in may… hes still in pull ups most of the time because hes lazy… we try no nappy days and he will just go put one on he dont care
Tell her nicely to mind her own business. I know what it’s like but it was my Mum that kept bugging me. My son was 5 when he learnt it was the summer just before he started school. He was the same just wouldn’t go and then when he did do it its like he trained himself. He has been diagnosed with an Intellectual Disability though and possibly also has ASD so not sure if that makes a difference. I’m sure your Daughter will get there when she’s ready too. Good Luck 
My 3 kids were all trained by there 4th birthday BUT the middle child a boy was my biggest challenge. He would pee pee in the big toilet, then turn around and poop his pants. That was so frustrating, I tried treats, new match box cars, little green army men but nope till one day after he pooped his pants I put poop on the end of his nose. He screamed bloody murder. Omg…that was the last time he pooped in his pants.
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Doesn’t make you a bad mom, but can be inconvenient for you or those that care for her. My daycare requires kids to be potty trained when they transition into the 3/4 year old class, but all my kids did around 1.5-2.5 yo. Try investing in some potty training books, they worked great with my kids. Good luck
First of all f you’re MIL sorry but she’s crossing her boundaries if you’ve already expressed that she’s YOUR child and your MIL still don’t get it (I’ve had issues with my BDs mother especially when we were together) secondly if she’s not interested she’s not interested that’s not your fault in any way shape or form. My daughter turned 3 in August and we are still working on it. We have our good days and our bad days sometimes we go through all the undies we have and sometimes we only use 1. One thing that helped with getting my daughter interested was just having her potty in the area we were in so if we were in the living room playing she had it available if we went to the garage it came out there with us. Sometimes I even let her pee in the grass if she wanted at least it wasn’t in her pants 
(I live in the middle of nowhere with one neighbor who’s over half mile down the road) it takes time you can’t rush it. Now she refuses to use her little potty she has to use the big one. We have a little seat that sits on it that fits her butt so she doesn’t have to hold herself up. And surprisingly she wipes herself and does good. Unless she poops then she needs help but insists on doing it herself first. My truck for that was when she was diapered I actually handed her the wipe when I changed her for her to do it herself. She would stand up and I would explain and she did it and she kept doing it when moved to potty. You’re doing great no matter what anyone says! She will get there! I found that mine was more willing when I asked her if she wanted to try to sit on potty sometimes she would and sometimes she said no and that was ok I just said ok maybe next time. She also gets a high five when she goes potty and we make a huge deal and I tell her to go tell grandma and grandpa and they give her high fives too so it’s kind of an incentive of feeling really good about herself when it happens because everyone is so excited for her!
All children are different. Take for someone that had an in home daycare with 4 in diapers at the same time. Put her in regular panties and make a big deal about it. Have her go to the store and help you pick them out. Have her favorite book and a timer next to the potty. While she sits you can read to her or she can look at a picture book. If she doesn’t go in 5 minutes ( timer). Let her get up and pull up her own panties. Put her on the potty every hour and if mom has to use the timer for that it’s ok. Life gets crazy. She will get it. As long as she gets it before preschool your good. Tell your mother in law if she thinks she is so good tell her to come over a potty train her lol
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Youre not a bad mom, kids will do it when theyre ready
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I’m all for lazy parenting when it comes to potty training. They do it when they’re ready. If you fight them, it’s stressful, tear filled and the house smells like pee. 
just shy of 4 my son said, I don’t like poop on my butt, and I want superhero underwear. Bam! Potty trained! No accidents, no running, no stress. Happy kid and Mom. Before being a mom I was a nanny. Some kids did it at 18m, some at 2, some at 3, some at 6. They’re all different. Tell MIL to mind her business, and do what’s right for your family. You’re doing a great job momma!
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My 1st child was 3 my second was 4 x
Kids potty train when they are ready. I highly suggest talking to your pediatrician and getting info so when your mil does say something you can come back with facts.
Thats how I handle everything with my daughter. Arm myself with facts so haters can’t shut it.
As long as you don’t notice any other delays keep doing what you’re doing momma! You know your baby best.
Not sure if it will work for your daughter but it worked for mine… put panties on her. My daughter hated having wet panties on and eventually started going to the bathroom. I got lucky cause by the time she was 3 she was completely potty trained but I also think that was because she had an older step sister at the time that she wanted to be like and she had seen her use the bathroom… it doesn’t make you a bad mom. Hell.my son still has accidents at night and he is gunna be 6 in January
My first was a girl, and I was 18, by 10 months she was walking, and starting to use the potty, by a year old she was wearing pretty panties and didn’t even need night diapers… boy, did I Not learn anything. The next child was a boy, he wad a huge learning curve, he didn’t start walking until he was almost 14 months old, I wondered what I was doing wrong, he wasn’t out of diapers until he was over 3, I knew I was failing that parenting stuff… then I read that it’s not at all normal for a child to have the physical ability to control those bladder and bowel muscles until they are 24-36 months old! Why my daughter was so early I have No clue, but kid #3 was running at 10 months, and falling and back up to run again, it took him some time to decide he could slow down and walk, doing a little less falling. He was in the normal range for out of diapers as was #4. I think in part it’s your child being with you while you use that toilet, for boys, it’s also seeing how Dad does that stuff, so they start forming some concepts of that unconsciously. Babies learn so much by what they see and hear and touch, the huge leap a hearing impaired child makes once they have a hearing aid, the huge leaps a vision impaired child makes when they have glasses show how much that stimulation matters. I think toilet use is also something that kids do better with when they often are with their parents and older siblings for that job.
My girl is almost 3 and not potty trained. She knows how to amd goes sometimes but when she is busy being a kid she doesnt think to go to the big girl potty. I dont force her to go. I try to help her sometimes and remind her but i feel like until they are 4 its not a big deal. Especially if you are trying. Every kid starts at a different time. Just because one child may ne potty trained at 2 doesnt mean your not a good mom because yours is 3 and not trained.
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Tell your mother in law in a nice way to mind her own business, and when your daughter is ready, she is ready and that’s that. If she plans on continuing to argue cut her off and say listen I don’t want to hear it, and I don’t appreciate you trying to belittle me as a mother. I appreciate your concern but stop because it’s beginning to become to much. And then boom walk out and take your kid lol
She’ll go when she is ready. Not a second sooner. Hang in there mama, she’ll come around!!!
You aren’t doing anything wrong. Don’t listen to your MIL. Nobody knows your child like you do. And not every child learns the same way or at the same pace.
My oldest was 3 1/2 when she was every child is different. Some are at 2 nd ike my middle some are just not ready dont feel bad
Don’t feel bad. Every child is different they say. What I did with mine is that I potty with her, she used her training potty and we go side-by-side. Same goes whe she pees. It wasn’t easy at first. That’s your child. Ignore your MIL.
My son refused to poop in the potty till he was almost 6. He had bad anxiety. We did the “poop fairy”. He didn’t poop alot but every time he was pooping the “poop fairy” would bring a small toy. From the dollar tree, it worked great!
Do I know what time ypur child goez at night? I would wake my daughter at the time she would wet the bed and put her on the potty until she started waking me up to go herself never put her to sleep in a diaper so she would feel unsafe to pee. Sometimes id put it on while shes asleep without her knowing its gonna be challenging but u have to be constant daily to get it done. My daughter was potty trained before she was 2 and hasn’t turned back since.
You’re not a bad mama at all! I’ve always heard it’s best to not force the issue & to let them decide when they’re ready. My 3 year old daughter won’t use the potty either. I’ve tried everything. Got her a little pink potty that flushes and a Peppa toilet seat for the big toilet but she still wants nothing to do with them unless she’s trying to wear the Peppa seat as a hat I try not to worry about it and just hope she’ll be ready soon but it still stresses me out.
She’ll go when shes ready. You’re not doing anything wrong, & for you mil tell her all kids are different an when the times right, your daughter will be potty trained. You’ve got this. 
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My twin boys were literally 6 by the time we fully got them out of diapers… they would pee in the potty all day long the sec they had to poo a diaper… finally they spent a couple months with their dad over the summer no more diapers!!!
Your not a bad mom. Babies 3yo. You still have some time.
If you force lo it will backfire.
Stay calm and consistent and very loving when it come to the potty training or lo ain’t gonna have it. Reward system, read potty books and watch potty shows with lo.
As for your mil- sounds like no matter what you say to her she’s just the type to be a know it all. I’ve dealt with one of those b4- just roll what she says off your shoulder if insulting, say simple assertive things like oh - I may try that, or I have tried that, it’s not for us, and make an appt with los pediatrician just be sure there aren’t any underlining medical reasons lo is resistant to potty training. Your child’s Dr may even help you come up with a training plan.
Then after you’ve assessed all that, just be frank w mil- tell her you and ur lo Dr have a plan - here it is- get on board w it or be quiet about it.
That’s another huge thing to potty training- all involved have to be on the same page abt training. If not this creates confusion and fear of the unknown for your girl and potty training can be scary enough.
Good luck. Stay strong momma.
…i do have to wonder, what’s dad say abt mil’s “help” on the topic?
Every kids learns at their own pace, my son is almost 3 and only uses the potty when he wants to, just give her time and reward her when she does use the potty, and dont let anyone tell yoh that you are a bad mom as long as you are doing what you think is right and trying your hardest then you are a wonderful mom❤
She won’t start school in diapers. It will happen one day. Every little one is different and a premie beginning can put some children behind on certain milestones. Potty training will happen when the child is ready. Relax Mama, listen to your child. Don’t pay any attention to m-i-l or other criticism from people who are not your child’s parent.
Nope. She’ll do it in her time and of you push her your going to give her potty trauma and it’ll be even worse Mx
Both my kids took interest in wanting to go to the toilet a few months after they turned three when they felt like they were ready. I never forced my son or daughter to go to the toilet, they just woke up one day and decided they wanted to go 🤷
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Your doing good mama’s! Just be patient!
The fact that you are asking if you are a bad mom means you are a great mom. I didn’t even potty train my girls! I sent them to stay with their grandma for a week and they came home potty trained! I feel no shame!!
Your child will go when ready, my grandkids didn’t till almost 4, they both do well now. Try buying her some big girl panties, and say you can’t wear them till you use potty. May have some accidents, my daughter even used light poise pads for when they were learning to recognize urges. Hope that helps.
I had my oldest potty trained at 21 month’s. My second had problems for several years, but their dad and i separated while i was trying and then there’s my son. I tried at 2, he had no interest. When he was 3 i tried again and he finally decided it was okay. Each child is different. Let them be different.
Dont force her. She will use the potty when she is ready. As for your mother in law? Tell her to shut up and mind her own business.
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My boy was 2yrs fully potty no 1 and only 3 yrs and 8 months potty no 2 within 2 days. every child is different don’t push them momma. When they ready it will happy. Good luck xx
My daughter will be six next month and she still isn’t night time trained ignore her and do you it’ll happen when she’s ready
Hey every child is different. My youngest started on second birthday (Dec 14 ) he was potty trained by Christmas. My oldest was 3 when we started but still had accidents at 5
Message me girl. I’ve been there.
I have been there. My son did not potty train until he was 5!! He liked pooping in his pants. My daughter was 3 1/2 when I felt she was ready. Each child is different. Don’t be too hard on yourself
My son’s 3 is not intrested! When I try to force him it makes it worse for us all ! Mommy knows best! My little guy has always reached milestones when he was ready! 
ignore the bs
Not a bad mom. My son who will be 3 next month isnt potty trained and he has no interest in any of it. We’ve tried everything. He’s just not ready. I’m hoping within the next year he’ll hop on board. We ask him all the time if hes ready to use to big boy potty he says no. We’ve let him run naked and put big big undies on him and he’ll just go potty and not tell us until after hes gone. I’m in no big hurry. When hes ready hes ready, but thats not now.
Meh. Different kids do this at different ages. Tell MIL to stay in her lane.
Patience quit pushing her she will get the hang of it .
Put panties on her. She’ll hate the mess.
When my boys were 6 mo and 3 yrs old, we were on vacation, sitting by a pool and I was reading a book on potty training. A stranger came up to me and said…”see those 5 boys in the pool? They’re mine…trust me honey, there’s nothing that can potty train if they’re not ready!”. I put the book down and relaxed. Within 3 months, my 3 yr old was ready. I didn’t have girls but I’ve been told that fancy, lacy underwear works for girls…they don’t want to soil them. Good luck!
My kid would not let me go to the toilet alone. She’d hit her head on the door until I opened it. It was an intense love that knew no boundaries and she wants to be just like me. Whatever I want her to do, she has to see me do first. It sounds horrible, and some will probably say it’s abusive or wrong to let your child see you poop or shower with you, but the kid learnt hella quick when she realised mum doesn’t wear nappies every kid is different, every family is different. What works for me may not work for you. Toilet train them before they go to school, that’s your goal, other than that sit back let the rugrat be a rugrat. They grow up too fast as it is. But yea I’d be working at putting nana in her place, yes they are a valuable asset to the family, but they aren’t the matre de. Sometimes we need to parent the grandparents just as much as we parent the kids. Set boundaries and don’t let her abuse them or your kid will come home from nanas with her hair cut off and they’ll look you in the eye and lie like you don’t know your kids head that you squeezed through your kuta 
the problem isn’t with your kid sweet heart so have a Moscato and chill out xx
She will go when she is ready. Take her with you when you go. Sit her on the little potty while you are on the big potty. Just talk to her about anything. Also every once and awhile ask her if she has to go potty. They have control over two things at this age. It is potty training and eating. You can not make them go potty or eat.
Figure it out. We all had to