Your house your rules. Point blank if you want to partake in adult activities partake in them all get your own place with your own job pay your own bills and you don’t have to worry about anyone telling you that you can’t do certain things. Hold firm mom it’s all you can do
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My oldest daughter wasn’t allowed to have her fiancé upstairs and she was 22. I had younger children in the house and just thought it set a bad example
He definitely was not allowed to sleep over
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It’s your house, your choice. But lord would I hate having you as a stepmom
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I would not want a bunch of random dudes in and out my house with my kids and my stuff. I don’t know you, you best not be in my house. I agree if she wants to live an adult life she’s needs to be getting her own place. You never know about people nowadays and having small children in the home with random people just don’t sit well with me… if it was a long-term boyfriend that you knew well that might be different My house ain’t no flop house and it ain’t going to be treated like one…
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I agree with you. 
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She can play in her own place!
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Your house your rules. Also having a younger sibling in the house, I wouldn’t either. Shes an adult she can make those decisions at another adults house.
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My issue too that would like to bring up is you having the lust urge or jealous how young still she is to be attractive and sexualize that it bothers you to see it
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I didn’t know there were so many people willing to stand up for a young girl having a ton of security partners 
damn. Guess I’m getting old.
Just because you sày you’re nòt shàming means nòthing. You absolutely are shàming her. Multiple dífferent times actually. Tbh I have a feeling that even if she dïd move out you’d still have something to say about it
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Hold your ground Mom you are right here…
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Your house your rules. As you stated she is old enough to have her own place if she wants men to stay over. Plus you having younger children she’s not thinking about them. Who knows who these people are and what their about. It’s a dangerous world and I sure wouldn’t be letting some strange men in and out of my house.
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I’m probably the least conservative mom ever, and I still agree with you.
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She can get her own place! I wouldn’t want my little ones around it either!!
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I don’t think you’re wrong. Especially since you have little ones in the house.
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Your house your rules and no I wouldn’t let mine have men spending the night. Not that have any kid’s that age, mine are all grown. If the fits she can wear it. You’re right in my opinion, best of wishes to you!
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Does she pay rent? She’s old enough to have guests spend the night. She’s an adult. And by the way you are absolutely shaming her. Shame on you.
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Act like an adult? She is an adult!!! Get over yourself!!!
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It’s your house so she needs to follow your rules. She’s 20, if she doesn’t like the rules she can move out and make her own rules.
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Then tell her move out get her own place pay her own bills an get out ! It’s a hard no ! She wants to play adult tell her get a full time job an pay her own bills an move out ! They want it all till they have to work an pay for it ! My daughter moved out after she graduated an paid her own bills .
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Your house. Your rules. Period. And to have that going on around younger kids is not okay in my book. Just let her know that she is free to do and believe what she wants and you love her and don’t judge her but it’s your house and if she wants to stay there it’s your rules as well.
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We could of done without the information of how many people she has been with because that is her choice entirely but I agree with you on this one, there is nothing worse ‘NOTHING WORSE’ than hearing your child have sex under your roof. I am traumatised due to this and do not like it one bit. I think it’s rude and disrespectful and inconsiderate of anyone else in the home and it’s going to happen if their having sleep overs and in that moment they’re not thinking about anyone else but themselves. Stand your ground for yourselves and your younger children and don’t let it happen.
It’s YOUR house, YOU make the rules. End of discussion.
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To stop an argument I’d simply tell her that she CAN have the company over when she’s in a stable relationship for 3 months plus.
Your concerns are valid. I wouldn’t want random men in and out of the house when there’s young kids v
My cousin had a different girl over almost every damn night. Same house where I had my baby boy and I didn’t want him learning from My stupid cousin. Treated My house like a f*cking brothel! I kicked his dumb immature ass out of my house and haven’t spoken to him since. Good riddance
Here’s the thing, I would not want a train of random people, men or women, parading through my house. That goes for any age or circumstance. If she is just “hooking up” with randoms, she should have the respect for you and for her family to not bring them home. Now if she’s in a relationship with someone, that’s a different story.
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I had a baby by my ex and we couldn’t even sleep in the same room if we happened to sleep over at his parents house 
Hell no. You don’t know who she will bring into the house especially if she has younger siblings. She can play at their house.
Absolutely no boys over to spend the night before u kno it she will be pregnant
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Umm… if she’s going to have random hookups… thats a no go in a family home… the littles don’t need to be seeing random guys coming and going. That’s not ok. She needs to get her own place.
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Your house, your rules! You don’t need a reason.
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I feel like if the guy doesn’t have more respect for his “dates” parents than for this…she may want to pass anyway. Rly shldnt even b an issue but the world we live n today:woman_facepalming:t4:
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You don’t want random men in your house, period!
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I dated my husband from 18 y/o to 24 y/o ……that’s when we got married. We went away to college together. When he stayed with me at my parents house, he had to sleep in the guest room or the basement……my parents house and I had to follow their rules.
Ur house ur rules she wants to play house she needs to get her own place
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Shauna Wilson I was sat here thinking surely I’m not the only one who can see a problem here thank goodness I’m not, and saying she’s not sl*t shaming her yet here she is asking an online group if shes in the wrong or not. It’s 2022 not 1935, she can have as many sexaul partners as she pleases, as a parent or step parent isn’t our jobs to make sure that our kids or bonus kids (or adults in this case) are safe? What would she rather her take them to a bush
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Id just say you don’t want to set a bad example for the younger kids. Period. Your house your rules. If she wants to spend the night with someone do it at their house, and just let you know ahead of time so you don’t worry. There is nothing wrong with that.
Your house, your rules.
And TBH, she’s not setting a very good example for younger siblings. Not to mention how well does she know these men she wants to bring in? 
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That would be an awkward breakfast with some random shirtless dude and your daughter smelling like a turtle tank eating waffles at the dining room table.
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How does her father feel about it?
your house. your rules! like you said, she’s 20. if she doesn’t like your rules then she can get her own place!
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My parents never would allow even tho I lived at home until I was 27
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If you don’t like her. Why don’t you just positively support and encourage her to gain employment, save and find herself her own accommodation. I never lived with my parents at that age. Can you please stop focusing on the negatives and score count on her. You may have respected yourself at her age but it’s because you had healthy role models who had morals in your time. That generation no longer exists. You should get her a batch or a sleep out. So that she has privacy and her have a safe place for your babies 
Nope you’re not wrong. She is an adult. If she wants to do adult things she can get her own place. It’s one thing to have a boyfriend stay the night and it’s another to have different guys in and out. Not shaming her she can do what she wants with her body but it isn’t safe to just have randoms in and out of your house when you have younger children there.
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To be honest I feel it’s disrespectful to her and her family for you to be blasting her on here even about her sex life like that. It seems there may be some other issues but between you two that need to be worked out and if I were her dad you and I would be having a real serious conversation about how your blasting her all over like that.
Even if you didn’t have little ones in your house, it’s your house! She needs to respect that or find her own domain!
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If she wants to sleep around with multiple men then she can get her own place. What kind of example is she setting for her younger siblings. Go to the men house she sleeping with.
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Sounds fine to me. Your house your rules. When she moves out or gets her own place, she can do as she pleases.
Your whole post is one big sl*t shame. Reevaluate and try again
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I’m 23 and I totally agree with you no boys aloud
I would say your house your rules…
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The people here saying just let her do it because she’s an adult amaze me.
Obviously she’s not an adult even though she’s of age. She doesn’t live by herself. She lives in her parents home. Does she pay bills? If the answer to that is no too then I’m sorry but my house my rules applies.
Especially with you having younger kids there, I’d tell her no. Having random guys over that you don’t know you can trust is an issue. Had she been dating someone consistently I’d be much more apt to tell you to allow it.
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Also please don’t listen to the person telling you to kick her out. She’s 20 and probably doesn’t have a way to support herself quite yet. That will absolutely further the damage in the relationship. Try to resolve this first
She can move out pay bills and be all the adult she wants to be u are being a mom not a landlord
Your house, your rules. If she wants to act grown she can get her own place or go to their place.
I had a curfew when I lived at my mom’s with my husband (we were 23 years old) and we paid rent. No boys over, if not a boyfriend is not unreasonable. She should be respectful of the rules of the house.
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Your house your rules. My parents let my boyfriend spend the night when I was in college but he slept on the couch and I in my room
Oh no not “I don’t try to slut shame her…” and “you could build a football team from who she has sex with” all existing in the same paragraph 
you’re absolutely shaming her. It’s your home and we can tell you what to do in your house but don’t get angry if she acts out to being shamed
your house, your rules. When it’s her house she can do whatever she wants.
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Tell her when she has her own place she can have bf’s stay at her place.
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Ewwww just you just slut shame your step daughter?
Your house your rules! If she doesn’t like them she can move out
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Don’t try to cover your tracks. You ARE being judgemental and not only that keeping track of and blasting that business in a spiteful way on here. I highly doubt you have a decent relationship with her based on how you’re talking about her… Being a bonus kid/parent is hard enough, you sound like a bitter btch tbh. Yes, it’s true your house your rules. But take into account that A) she is an adult B) why is she still home? Is it because the economy is sht and it’s hard to find wages that allow you to survive on more than ramen? Not just that she’s lazy and irresponsible? B) put yourself in her shoes, reflect and then approach her having a cool, calm, and collected conversation explaining your thoughts and points without being judgemental and rude (as in this post)
Maybe offer to help her find a decent job and/or appt in her price range?
But for the love of God, dont say something like I don’t want to be judgemental but… Then follow it by being exactly that. We see you. We see what you’re saying, how you feel, and what you mean. You ain’t slick.
My parents always said as long as I was under their roof, I played by their rules and if I didn’t like it I could leave.
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You sound judgemental as fuck though😂
Your house your rules. My daughter is almost 25, living with me. She knows better than to ask. If she wants sleep overs she needs her own place
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Everything else aside.
You’re house your rules. If she wants freedom, she needs to get an apartment.
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Your house your rules if she don’t like it she can move out
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Your house, your rules. She can always get her own place!
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It’s your home. If she had a steady partner I would let my adult daughter bring him home, but if it is a revolving door of one night stands and I have younger children in the house it would be a hard no. Don’t care about the uncommitted sex, just don’t want a bunch of strangers in and out of my home around my young children.
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Your house, your rules. Don’t like it? Move out!!
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No is the answer all day (and night) long. You do not need to justify why. You and your husband have the final say period.
She is old enough to move to her own domain to do as she pleases…until then the answer is simply…NO.
(Just for clarity, all the reasons you have are perfect reasons, but you still do not need to justify any reason. Just No)
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Hell no, yall think you grown you him or boss can pay for a room or move out or do your business outside of the home
But #1 don’t allow strange ass guys in your house where you have young children
U actually are super level headed. I read the first sentence with the 20 years old n was like woah let her do her thing but then after reading ur reasonings, ur 100% in the right (and this coming from someone who’s quite free spirited and rather lenient with my kids). If homegirl is 20 n not responsible enough to provide for herself then she isn’t responsible enough to be having dudes stay the night 
. Plus if she’s that “active” lmao maybe suggest she get a night job instead of spending her time laid up with someone. Then she can afford her own place too 
win/win for everyone 
!
Side note- just a suggestion- make sure that she’s using proper protection (birth control and condoms especially if she is multiple partners). Last thing she wants at 20 is a std.
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Definitely your house your rules but I just want to bring your attention to some of the things you said-it seems like you are slut shaming her-especially if you have said those things to her or in front of her. Just say My house, my rules…AND IF you want to add that you wouldn’t mind a steady bf…if not… don’t. Seriously… my house, my rules is enough darlin.
You’re home you’re rules, period. Not much more you really need to explain to her lol
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Yall saying she is an adult let her do as she pleases!!! Wow just wow!!! I was 19 at home working full time… got pregnant and no my parents would not allow him to stay the night. I actually wouldn’t have even thought about having sex under my parents roof at 19 and pregnant as to me it was super disrespectful… she wants to to have multi partners while living under her parents roof then she needs to grow up and move out… now as I am gonna be 38 and if my 2nd baby’s dad and I were still together and we needed a place to stay my parents would let us but I still wouldn’t have sex under their roof… hell makes me uncomfortable to have sex under my own roof with my 17 yr old son living at home. Guess I was raised with with different morals… not to mention my 2nd baby is 4 and I still have yet to have another man stay at our house since she was born. Just doesn’t feel right to me
Yep no shame for her personal choices here. I would probably avoid the football team and zero skills comments if your going for a judgment free approach. However, with little kiddos in the house it’s just safer not to have constant unfamiliar people in your home. I would honestly feel the same with any friends or partners that I didn’t know well sleeping over, regardless of their planed night time activities.
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You don’t need excuses! It’s your home……period!
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I agree with the ur house ur rules…
However you do come off as s*** shaming 
and posted this on a group with tons of strangers
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I don’t think you’re wrong 
my brother in law lives with us and I won’t let a bunch of random females come in and out of my house with my 4yr old daughter here. He tries to say the same bs “I’m a grown man” and yea he is. But I won’t have it in my house, they want to be adults then they can get their own place and be the adults they say they are UNLESS it was a long term boyfriend, but even then there would be rules with that
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With younger siblings in the house I wouldn’t allow it either. If it was a boyfriend of several months that I was comfortable with maybe but rando guys that are different each night? Hell no. They might harm the younger kids while everyone is asleep.
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No, she wants to be adult let her be on her own house
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I can understand you not wanting random men in and out of your house but let’s not shame her for it.
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Your house, your rules. She should get her own place. You have little ones there and I completely understand!
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I agree with everybody here. If she wants to have sex, she needs to get her own place. She needs to respect your rules since she lives there.
And with all due respect if you would have asked opinions on the rules without all the other unnecessary details it wouldn’t seem so bad about you asking.
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“I’m not slut shaming her, for her hobby” after you slut shamed her the whole post…
Your house your rules, but… You don’t have to talk about her sexual life, the amount of partners, that’s not our business or yours.
In the world we live in today very few 20 yr olds can actually afford their own place so I do not agree that is a fair reason to say no. If you want her to do more then make it an agreement she can start helping out around the house and can have one guy over. I think it’s alittle unfair and you really shouldn’t judge her like that. She’s young and learning. Maybe set a better example for her. 
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I get your house your rules. But please dont talk bad about her like that and shame her. Im a complete stranger and that made me feel bad for the girl. Thats not okay.
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Jesus. She’s 20 don’t judge her. Time for her own place with girls her age - it was the best thing for me!!!
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Your home, your choice. I think it’s a wise decision.
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Your house your rules if she wants to have sex like a grown up she can move out like a grown up
You forgot to say if she pays you any money to stay with you?
If she’s paying to stay there shouldn’t be a problem as its as much her home as it is yours. Plus she’s 20!! It should be non of your business how many people she’s been with.
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I mean it’s your house ! If she wants to bring random men home then she should move to her own place and bring whoever she wants. that’s just basic respect.
Your house your rules she dnt like it tell her go get her own place
Nah. My house is not a hotel. If it was a spouse or long time thing that’s different. But my house will not be used as a cheap hotel. Like you said, you want to be doing grownup things then pay your grownup rent. Especially with little ones still at home.
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It is your home your rules.
However does she pay rent? Because that opens up a whole different conversation.
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Rules are rules. Maybe my 2 sister’s
Your home your choice and your rules
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