Well if he wants to do that then he can. Whatever 
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Sounds normal to me. If he only has her one day a week, why would he be sending you clothes? Shouldn’t you have clothes for the other six days?
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It’s way easier and safer this way. No fighting because something lost or damaged.
And honestly, do you pack up clothes, shoes, toiletries, food or toys to give him whenever he has her? … bc that exactly where this fight leads….seen it many times before

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Why are you mad he makes sure she has her own stuff at his house as well. Leave the man alone.
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I don’t think it’s a big deal at all. Besides that should make it easier not to have to buy or pack anything for his house
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It’s ridiculous and a bit petty, but it’ll eventually change. Imagine being 15 and having to change clothes to leave the house with your dad and then change clothes to go home. When she starts dressing herself and getting some independence about what she does and does not want to wear you’ll start to see.
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Be happy he’s buying her stuff…
It could be a lot worse…
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Be glad he brought her clothes and who cares , now if he was keeping the clothes u bought u would be saying the opposite thing . Who cares like u said they are her clothes and he doesn’t need to bring her things he bought her he can keep them at his house for when she is there why does everything that’s hers need to be at your house . When she is older she will take whatever she wants over there and to your house . Also maybe he is going to keep her stuff for when his new baby gets older and instead of you flipping when that day comes because his new child has on something you bought your daughter he is deciding now just to keep everything at his house .Sounds like your the one being ridiculous since u found out he is having another baby . Who cares she has what she needs at his house and yours go on about your life senseless drama . You would be mad either way it’s not about the clothes . Your mad about the new baby
Wtf no he doesnt need to give you clothes. My son has clothes at his dads then clothes at my house.
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Him only getting her once a week is not shared parenting. That is visitation. Shared parenting is 50/50 or as close to it as possible. We have custody of my step daughter and we get my stepson for 10 day stretches. He goes home for 5 days and comes back for another 10 days through the summer. We support him while he’s here, she supports him while he’s there. She’s never sent clothes or anything with him even when he only comes over for the weekend. It’s not her responsibility to support him while he is at my house. It’s mine and his father’s. Sounds like you need to stop being bitter and just be happy he’s still in her life. Especially if you think shared parenting is him only getting her one day a week.
Why would he send the clothes he has for her at his home to yours? When he gets her. Send her out the door. No arguments on what’s lost or forgotten.
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It could be worse. You could be sending her in nice clothing and he could be keeping the nice clothing and sending her back in rags. That’s what my ex done. I think you need to get over yourself and be happy he’s providing for her even if he is only providing her with these things in his time with her. If you have her the rest of the time you provide the rest when she’s with you.
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Me and my son’s father does it this way… He has everything he needs at my house and everything he needs at his dad’s. It’s always been much easier because we don’t have to pack clothes, diapers, wipes, etc for him when he goes back and forth. His clothes his dad buys stays at his house, and what I buy stays at mine.
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You lucky he doin anything some mom’s don’t have that. Your being selfish and shared custody is not one day a week. I have shared custody and when they are at his house he supplies when they with me I do. If he needs help I help if I need help he helps. It sounds like your making it about you when it should be about her
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That’s exactly what we do. We have 50/50 custody, but he wears and uses our things while at our house and uses mom’s at her house. And on Fridays when he goes back to mom’s he goes back in the clothes from her house. We don’t have anything go back and forth besides what he comes home in from school when I pick him up.
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This is totally normal. I keep 2 kids after school. The parents are divorced. Every Friday I do this exact thing with them. The mom buys nice clothes for the kids. The dad don’t care. He will let them ruin school clothes. Stain everything. I know because that’s the kind of clothes they wear the week they are with him. The nice shoes, clothes and even coats are left at my house until it’s mom’s week again. Dad only gets play clothes.
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It beats you sending clothes and not getting them back
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Sooo… I’m just not seeing what’s wrong
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You sound bitter asf because he’s having another baby I dunno why that was relevant to him purchasing his own clothes I’m willing to bet if he didn’t your ass would be on here complaining about that
Why don’t you just suck it up and be grateful you have a baby daddy that provides and takes the kid
Probably pays you child support to but god forbid? Like do you need baby clothes
Or something because there is lots of groups on fb you may find more useful if you need shit like why are you complaining that hes keeping his shit he bought at his house lmao stop being bitter and complaining about shit some moms would die for
Hes bought things for her be grateful how come you dont just take care of her needs on your time and be grateful hes involved. My sons dad doesn’t send clothes with him nor do I send clothes over to his. Yes my son might bring some things home and that’s fine but I take care of his needs during my time his dad during his.
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Sorry but that’s weird AF in my opinion… so what he sees her once a week like gets her to go to the park or something anf changes her in and out of what she was wearing… just weird like is he embarrassed by the clothes u put her in or something idk maybe having separate clothes if she actually spends time at his place but one day a week not even overnight is weird… maybe I’m reading wrong.
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This is normal and imo prob the best way to do it.
He sounds ridiculously controlling. I’d let it go and not let him know it bothers you because then he’s just controlling your emotions. The good thing I guess is that you don’t have to worry about the clothes from your house not being returned. Good luck and sorry you’re dealing with such a jerk.
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No he def can keep her clothes that he gets and doesn’t have to give them to you. It’s dumb, I get it bc I’m in the same situation with my gfs ex. But as long as he has clothes and stuff for her and you get yours back, that’s all. that matters
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I see how it is petty and bothersome. Only a year and already split. Sounds like something his newest baby momma suggested. Anyway, it makes it feel like the child is a business transaction and that really is sad coparenting but nothing you can do about it. Just let it be for now. Your daughter will not remember this so it’s okay.
I have clothes for my kids at my place and my ex has clothes at hers. We just wash and send them back to each other. We don’t change them back into the clothes they came in… we let clothes go back and forth.
I personally like the way he’s going about it. He’s being responsible for her in his time and doing the providing when he has her & vice versa. 
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Not a bad thing he wants what he buys at his house. I’m personally not like that but some people are
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most parents actually want this.
Because usually dad will keep the gold clothes and send them back with some stained up play clothes.
He’s doing the correct thing for this one. Sorry your upset for no reason.
Girl, I WISH my kids dad would do this. I have to send them with clothes and shoes and they always leave stuff there. 
Karen Karen Karen do you realize how foolish you sound . My daughter and her husband would send his son home in clothes they bought . She would send him back in rags or dirty clothes. After they lost all they bought him to her . They would wash the rags she sent him in and when he went home he wore the clean rags home .
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No matter how it makes you feel it’s not worth getting worked up over. It does seem odd or even him trying to he controlling. But in the end even you said it’s not like you need the clothes etc. so just ignore it and don’t let it get to you
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That’s what we did 
my bonus daughters mom never had to worry with packing a bag. She always had what she needs at both places. Now she lives with us full time (her mom passed last year) and we were able to make the transition smoothly because she already had all her stuff. Also when your little gets older it will make her feel better knowing she has “stuff” at moms and at dads.
He keeps clothes at his place to have some when he does have here. I don’t see the issue. You have clothes for her right? & he has clothes for when she visits.
My son’s father and I are exactly how you described because he always loses our son’s essentials and then I’m the one who ends up replacing and it’s very hard on the pocket. He can’t even be responsible for 1 set of clothes(the clothes that our son is wearing on the day he picks up) as even they go missing and don’t come back
My granddaughter went back and forth. She came home in same clothes. She had clothes, tablet, etc at his house. Mom had everything at her house.
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I mean if you were to go through custody the judge will tell y’all that the other parent doesn’t have to send anything for the kid when they go with the other parent and that each parent is responsible for having what their child needs when they are with them I don’t see the problem with it especially since nothing you send over will be ruined and then cause an argument about that.
If you have plenty, what’s the problem?
I don’t think you are going to get the answer you are/were looking for in this thread but perhaps you will see what he is doing is being responsible for his daughter!
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I wouldnt make it an issue. At least you know that she has clothes to wear when she is with dad.
As long as he is taking good care of her, I wouldnt care about the clothes. Imo its petty to dig to deep into this. Let him do what he wants to do with what he buys her.
And the grow out of they so fast.
With courts honestly they usually tell parents to do what he is doing. Have the kids the clothes dad buys them at dad’s house and mom’s at mom’s house. Any clothes at pick up be returned to parent that dropped kid off.
We did this with my step son bc if we sent him in our clothes we never seen them again which wouldn’t be so bad but in spring and fall he would come in shorts when it’s warm but in the am it was chilly so he would go to daycare in our pants and pretty soon we have all shorts and we ask for our pants back and she would just say “you have just as much clothes there as here” or “idk what your talking about” meanwhile later we see her younger kid wearing them
I have three bonus kids. They don’t bring anything with them. I always wash the clothes they came in so they can wear them back. This prevents agreements and neither parent is paying for clothes they don’t get back! I do this with their lunch boxes, shoes and jackets as well.
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I really don’t see the big deal here… sounds like you just want to complain about him when he’s not doing anything wrong
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What does it matter? He pays for them it’s ok for him to keep them at his house. You are mad for no reason.
None of this is a big deal, just suck it up and be the adult
Really? I think you need to grow up!
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As a step parent, no we change him back into the clothes he is sent in due to the fact anytbing I send him with never comes back. I am missing clothes, toys, even a cooler I had sent food in because she needed some help. Nothing ever comes back. So no he has ever right to keep his stuff separate, plus what I buy I want to save for my next child, which is problem what his new woman wants to do. Your not entitled to his stuff.
Always make the child feel like they belong in both homes rather than constantly living out of a bag.
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I don’t see anything wrong it! I wish we had thought about this with my step son, we would sent him back with new clothes and he would comes to us with clothes that was 2 sizes smaller
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That’s how its done now. You exchange the kid only.
I think this is a totally appropriate way to co-parent. He keeps what he’s purchased for her with him and then he is solely responsible for the condition of all items. You do the same. Keep what you own for her with you and you can be responsible for the condition of all items and nothing will ever be lost between households with fingers being pointed back and forth. As long as both households have all the items she needs, this is a good way to prevent unnecessary friction between you and your ex.
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My little girls dad keeps her clothes and send her in his. And when we’re low or need them back, I go through her stuff there and bring it back about once a month Andi send her back with his stuff. Only thing I care about is getting her cups back and medication. Used to be an issue back when I’d give him a bunch of stuff and wouldn’t buy his own clothes for her. Now I tell him what sizes she is and that he needs to stock up. He’ll send her home in 2t or 3t… Too small for her. I no longer provide him with anything nor do I expect it from him, mostly cause he’s a dick. I make him provide his own things for her.
I don’t see a problem with it. My ex has his own clothes for my son, and I have mine. The only time I ask for help is for school supplies, clothes and shoes. 1 time a year. I dont receive child support either. I prefer getting back what I paid for.
He should have his own things for her. If he sent them over to you she’d have to live out of a bag at his house.
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It’s how we co-parent. We like it better this way. Goes smoothly for us
I got told that no one should be providing for the other parent because at the end of the day you should be providing for your child when you have them as you’re not the main carer for the child you still need to provide for them and it shouldn’t be the main parent who looks after the child all the time who has to provide for the child when they’re with you that’s unacceptable…
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Hes right. Why do you want what he bought?
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The woman he have change him …
I did the same things your ex is doing, I made my ex get his own stuff for our kids. I will send shoes because he sends them back, but we are pretty cordial and it seems you two are not. I’d just be happy he’s providing for his kid tbh
Let him have his own…
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New girlfriend that’s what happens
He’s right. You’re wrong
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That’s how we dd it …
This is pretty common. I wouldn’t stress over it. Sometimes you buy your kid something nice and like to see them wear it, if it goes to the other parent house you may never see it again.
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If hes paying child support I think what hes doing is OK
It’s definitely weird but it sounds like he has someone in his ear telling him to do this dumb shit. I wouldn’t pay it any mind though. If he wants to be petty, let him. You have everything you need for your daughter
He’s trying to save it for the next one… he’s also being very petty and childish… he’s probably just showing the baby off when she’s with him
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That’s how it’s done now. What you buy if for your house, what he buys is for his. That’s how me and my baby daddy do. We both send her back in the clothes she came in. If he spends a lot of money on clothes for her then that’s his problem for wasting money, not yours. It’s a good thing he got his own diaper bag and all that. Be happy you don’t have to fork money out for him to keep her and all as well. Also shows he’s growing to be a better father for y’all’s kid and his, and the woman he’s with is good for him as well. Be happy about that
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That’s how we always did it. They came in her clothes, they went back in her clothes. We never shared. They go with her for a weekend they pack our clothes and come back with our clothes.
i think you’re being over dramatic honestly. if you have plenty of stuff for your daughter at your house then what’s the problem?
does he ever ask you for stuff?
does he ever argue with stuff ?
stop complaining and be grateful that he actually buys her nice stuff to keep at his house. and actually gets her.
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Sounds like you’re just trying to pick arguments… It’s perfectly normal to have one set of clothes at mum’s and another at dads. My mum would send me to my father’s and never get the clothes shed send me in back, same thing with toys etc. It actually makes things easier in the long run
ThAts how I did it. I sent him with clothes, but either didn’t get them back or half of the outfit. So, I told him to supply his own for when he came over.
Why do you care if she has enough clothes
He should have his own things and you have your own for her. If he pays child support then you don’t need him to go buy her more extra things
I don’t see anything wrong with having “her” clothes that he bought with him. Unless you are thinking he wants them for his next child. Maybe you will be lucky and new baby will be a boy.
Who cares? Stop being petty
He has her 4x a month , you should be supplying the clothes
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This is petty and how it should go. I would consider yourself lucky he’s even involved at this point. The child needs its own space, toys and clothes at both homes. I agree with Dad.
My granddaughter parents co parents also they both buy for their daughter but it does matter to them who buys what… it their daughter things …if she wants to take a toy to the other so be it it’s her… and clothes who care their hers they don’t fight or get mad over the small stuff …they get along awesome because their daughter always comes frist …
You keep the clothes you buy, he keeps the clothes he buys. What’s so complicated about it. You sound like your jealous that he bought her new clothes for his house.
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Yes you’re wrong, it’s petty to feel some type of way about it. Be happy he doesn’t keep what you send her in that’s a whole other argument.
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With my bonus son, he lives in Texas with his mom for the school year and spends summers with us in idaho. His mom sends him with more pants than shorts and shirts that are too small for him, soo we’ve just bought him new clothes every summer and similar to your thinking, we’d always send them home with him because why keep clothes when he’s just gonna grow out of them next summer. However, she tends to keep a lot of stuff that we bought and sends stuff that is too small, soo we’ve started keeping the clothes we buy and send home the ones she sent. I honestly think that’s the best way to keep things separate and keep boundaries. He has every right to keep what he buys for his daughter at his house, especially when he makes sure you keep the things and clothes you buy at your house.
You are being ridiculous. If he pays child support he has every right to have his own stuff at his house for her.
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This is the normal co-parent life style each parent provides what the child needs at their place.
I’m not sure what ur problem is
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He buys them he can do what he wants with them and has every right to keep them. Specially if he’s having another kid that can use them. 
sounds like your being petty and just want a reason to be mad and fight with him. He’s not taking any of the clothes you bought.
Let him keep them he’s saving em for the new kid…
This is not ridiculous. My child is 7 and my ex and I have it set up like this. He pays for everything our child needs there and I pay for everything he needs here, it’s written into our custody arrangement. We split major purchases and both sides waived child support Now granted, we don’t go the route of making him change at drop off and pick up because that’s ridiculous and we allow him to bring things back and forth if he wants to. But I don’t buy clothing for his home and he doesn’t buy them for mine. Sometimes while I’m out buying a clothing haul he will have me pick some things up, but he pays me back even when I say he doesn’t have to. Shoes I tend to buy more of (and they go back and forth). My ex likes to get him shoes from Walmart or Target (which there is absolutely NOTHING wrong with), but I tend to see that these deteriorate faster so I often buy him slightly more expensive name brand sneakers because they seem to hold up better. I’ll send clothes to his home too if I want him to wear something specific for a certain day at school or whatever.
This literally isn’t hurting you in any way and he doesn’t HAVE to give you clothes/shoes for your home. If you’re getting child support, that should be being used on things she needs such as clothes. “He won’t let me have any” lmao you sound like a bratty child throwing a tantrum. Let it go. Sounds like you’re honestly bitter he moved on and is having another child so you’re looking for a reason to be pissed off. Focus on good coparenting or your DAUGHTER will be the one to suffer (not either of you) and eventually resent you both.
At least he buys for her, so why the hell are you complaining? Many don’t even get the clothes back that the child is sent in. You buy for her for when she’s with you, he does the same for his home - that is how mine and my ex husband do it with our two sons, and the biggest (and only) issue we have is socks and underwear. You’re being overdramatic and petty for no good valid reason.
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You are being childish at least he has stuff for her and is spending time with her you need to grow up
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That’s how it is. My mom & my brother would buy his daughter clothes & never let her go to her mom’s in them. It was easier. It’s only fair. Your being ridiculous.
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Wow this is NOT something to cause an issue over… this is how things are even I read growing up. We would change when we got to dad’s & change back into those clothes to go home. This is NOT worth it. There are SO many BIGGER things going on…
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I did this lol I didn’t want them to get ruined lol
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While I do think it’s petty, especially since the child doesn’t stay overnight, but whatever floats his boat I guess. As the child gets older, he might change his mind the child will want to pick out their own clothes, and might not want to change. Just roll wit it. And you’re right they are HER clothes! Good Luck!
So if you have plenty of clothes and things for your daughter at your home where she lives with you as you stated then why do you want the clothes that he has for her at his home? The man went out and got his own diaper bag and has clothes for his daughter at his home leave that man alone. He shows up what he’s supposed to spend time with her when he’s supposed to obviously buys her things so what is it you’re bitching about exactly? Smh leave that man alone. Cuz right now you just look Petty
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I have a 11 year old and a 7 year old. Thier dad and I split when the youngest was 3 months. He JUST bought them clothes for the first time ever 2 weeks ago. I wouldn’t complain, at least he’s taking care of her while she’s there. If he pays child support too, that’s more than some.
I actually prefer his way. I don’t go through this with a guy but I don’t like when my kids go to their grandmas house and leave their good clothes there that they went there in and come home in their old clothes that I gave them for there BUT I’m an adult and don’t throw a fit over it. If I’m ever over there, I just go pick their good clothes out of the mix.
It’s a good thing he’s providing for her at his house. Shoot my bd would not return anything nice he would send the kids home in stained clothes or clothes to small, their shoes would be “lost” ect.
So I actually agree with dad on this. This is how most co parenting situations are. Each parent has their own everything. My step son goes home in what he came in. It’s for a variety of reasons, but it works and there’s no argument about things.
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