You’re crushing him with a list of rules for a child that already belongs to him, that he shares half custody of. You’re making a power play and pulling strings to make him dance for you, and YOU are the one depriving your child of contact with her father. If he is willing and wants to see her or talk to her, LET HIM. Don’t play minute manager. You don’t own your daughter but you are gatekeeping access from a custodial parent. You are mad, acting out, and you are certainly in the wrong. He’s likely gone no-contact because you made it quickly apparent that if you say jump he better ask how high, and he’ll never be able to keep up with your demands, so he is discouraged from even trying. It looks like you want to micromanage his time&behavior even though you left so you wouldn’t have to do that anymore. If you want your daughter to have a relationship with her father, QUIT putting arbitrary conditions on it and acting like she’s a car you lease out. Unless a court or CPS has ruled otherwise, her father has literally just as much right to her time as you do. There’s no legal reason he couldn’t have physical custody of her right now, other than you deciding you had more rights to that child than he does. You felt she belonged more to you than to him, so it was your right to take her with. Many times there’s no winning against people like that.
l get paid over $111 per hour working from home. l never thought I’d be able to do it but my buddy makes over $10841 a month doing this and she convinced me to try. The possibility with this is endless.
Details HERE…https://Dollargalexy310.surge.sh
Do not keep your child from her father(unless need be, dangerous etc). Be the best parent you can be let him see her. I was somewhat in your shoes with my child’s father. He moved and didn’t see her much even when he came to visit his family and friends. He sees her much more often now and has for quite a few years. She’s 13 and just spent several days with him, her stepmom and baby brother and enjoyed it so much. Children need their father.
Who has a $14,000 electric bill?
You wrong and petty asf! You sound bitter
He is pathetic.
Get a winner & focus on you and your little angel.
You do not need that bs.
If you left him you can’t expect him to message her everyday. How old is the child? Can she even read? Or is it you that wants to keep control of him? I believe you are asking to much of someone you don’t want to be with
Did you ever think maybe it’s difficult for him to go from seeing her everyday to twice a week? Maybe speaking to her everyday triggers that loss? Maybe he’s trying to protect his mental health.
Him not paying the bills isn’t right and how tf do you run up $14k in utility bills! But, the courts are going to side against you. You can’t just decide you’re going to cut visitation because he didn’t call every day. Just like he can’t cut child support bc you refuse to allow him to see his child.
But the person suffering the most here from y’all games is the child.
You are trying to control him
Although hearing from her father daily would be nice, it is not realistic. If your daughter’s father is paying child support and is following his court rulings, then YOU are standing in contempt and YOU are denying his right to see his daughter. For this you can be charged.
Do yourself a favor, if he is being a good father to his daughter then stop being petty. Let it be.
He has shown he lacks responsibility by not paying his bills, I’m not sure I’d trust him to act responsible and be consistent with his daughter. Just because you can make or have a child doesn’t make you a good dad or mom. If you have a court order for his visitation then you have no say in this matter. If you don’t, he can take you to court and challenge your custody. I definitely understand your reasoning behind this. I met my bio dad, when I was fourthish. He was everything my mother said he was; irresponsible, self absorbed, but a nice guy. Just not father material, he needed someone to take care of him, pay his bills, work, cook, ect. While he tinkered with his hobbies. I would not leave a small child with him, even for a few hours. Nothing personal, but he was not responsible enough to take care of himself much less a child.
Many of you say: he’s her dad, which is true, but is he responsible enough to take care of a small child adequately? I know many people who have children and are not good parents or we would not have the juvenile crime rate we have. And yes, perfect parents do have imperfect kids, but if you can’t make your child a priority in your life, feed, cloth, house, AND parent, then maybe you should rethink your relationship with your child. You can shop at the thrift shops, and buy sale groceries, but children need care, guidance, and a stable, consistent environment. Hopefully she will get it from you. As for your ex, get a lawyer make everything legal.
Although I DO believe children deserve more from fathers in most cases (including yours), her father is still wanting a relationship with your daughter and is still making an effort to see her considering he is still coming to every visit, as he should, to see her. I’m suuuper tired of the “at least” narrative and I understand you being worried about inconsistency (I get it, I’m a single momma), but if he is still reaching out once a day, that is him keeping his feet in the water and wanting to be involved with your daughter. Hope it all works out. Much love to you and your daughter 
Him taking her every weekend was consistent then you decided it wasn’t enough effort. She’s not your doll so you’re not “letting him” take her. She’s his daughter, he has a right to see her. He’s not trying to win you back so your standards of what you think he should be or do are not the priority. His kid wants to see him and he wants to see her. That’s enough.
When he was doing it daily it wasn’t good enough for you. Jesus Christ! This is why parental laws are in place, makes more sense
Honestly… there’s a side to all story’s!! I think by the sounds of it he was making real effort in his daughters life till you started to try control his life still after breaking up… it’s so sad 
so many women do this, they think it’s their right because they’re the mother that they get to control everything…
l get paid over $110 per hour working from home. l never thought I’d be able to do it but my buddy makes over $13655 a month doing this and she convinced me to try. The possibility with this is endless.
Details HERE…https://Dollargalexy335.surge.sh
I can see both sides. He is still in her life. I would have loved my ex being in my daughters life at all. Sometimes it’s hard for a parent to reach out everyday
Let go of your own personal anger and let him be. You can’t force him but he is doing much more than many fathers out there! You are using the child to manipulate him!
I think once a week is enough " what is he going to talk about twice a day " mine didn’t hear or see their Dad for months at a time " they didn’t care nor did he "
I would still give him courtesy. Answer his calls when he calls, same with texts. If your child is old enough let them send him voice messages.
Contact goes both ways. You should be messaging him updates as well (or allowing your child to send voice messages/call first). Also you cannot deny him his weekends if it is court ordered, but if you do not and he is not asking to see her then theres no use in forcing.
However, as a child whose father was in and out of contact, i can understand wanting consistency. It really can mess a kid up when a parent is only around when its convient. You need to take steps to show you’re trying to initiate contact. I would start with a message about how you’re not trying to keep kiddo away, but they need some kind of consistency with messaging/calling and visits. Offer a compromise. If it still doesn’t work, then you need to have custody established and either court ordered visitation or court ordered “at will” visitation (you choose when he sees them bascially)
Seems like you just want him to do what YOU want/ think he needs to do. You chose to stop letting him see her. That wasn’t his choice… it was yours because he didn’t call when you wanted him too. Inconsistency on your end. Not cool.
He has every right to see His child as He sees fit, you dont have to like it. I know your want Him to be more consistent, but even once in a while contact beats never hearing from him like now. Your child needs a Dad, even one that doesnt call as much as you like.
Nah, it’s not really the normal to have daily contact when they’re young and can’t work a phone themselves. You’re making it more difficult than it needs to be. My 8 yo won’t even talk on the phone whether dad does call every blue moon for more than 5 mins. I won’t expect an child younger than that to be on the phone with their other parent daily like that. If he is trying and putting out an effort that’s all that matters. Wait making it harder than it needs to be. And if he doesn’t reach out that’s on him not you. You forcing it to happen doesn’t help
I hope he gets custody
l get paid over $110 per hour working from home. l never thought I’d be able to do it but my buddy makes over $14685 a month doing this and she convinced me to try. The possibility with this is endless.
Details HERE…https://Dollargalexy348.surge.sh
Seeing her every weekend is consistency as long as he has a permanent residence. It’s nice he called her during the week but why would it be required?
Not only do you act like you are 12 you’re committing fraud 
splitting bills should be the least of your concerns
He was taking her every weekend. That was consistent. He doesn’t have to speak to her every single day when she’s with you. You sound controlling. He lacks responsibility by not paying his bills, but that’s not really going to affect her now unless he stops paying his child support. Stop holding the child hostage and send her to her fathers on his weekends. I don’t get how not calling 2 times a day should mean he doesn’t get to see her. Some fathers only take their kid(s) every other weekend or less. You have a father that takes his child EVERY weekend and you’re keeping your daughter away from her father out of spite. Not cool at all
So you would deny your child a father completely because he - a grown man - doesn’t obey your rules on phone etiquette? He does not have to do what you say. He’s not abusive, drunk, on drugs… if the biggest problem in your life is phone calls be thankful. And to be perfectly honest, if you show up in court saying you denied a child the right to a father over not enough phone calls, you will be the one who gets slammed. This is absurd. Grow up and do what’s best for your child. Think about how it would look years down the road when you have to explain to a kid they have no father in their life because you refused contact because you didn’t like the AMOUNT of phone calls - you thought he should have more contact so instead you took it all away? WTF
You sound like a piece of work… Tbh, so does he, but holy shit you’re next level.
Your seriously mental and need help. Father was being consistent by seeing her every weekend. He should not have to call her several times a day because you said so… like he works 40+ hours a week. Your going to deny a child her father because your mad? You should be grateful he made the effort to see her weekly theres children out there that never see their father! Oh and Please explain how your electric bill was $14,000???
If you think your child should speak to him daily, why stop him from seeing the child? Doesnt make sense. You are the one keeping the child from seeing dad and complaining he doesnt call??
He doesn’t need to keep contact through you in order to show “consistency” if he’s taking her every weekend and doing a good job why tf are you not letting him?
My ex goes anywhere between a month to a year before he bothers to send a quick text to see how the kids are going. Not that I’d let him anywhere near them because he’s abusive.
The fugg is wrong with you women that have good loving fathers for their kids but can’t get over your jaded ass that he doesn’t want you anymore. Yes he can still have a healthy relationship with his kid without you butting into it.
I’m sorry if this is harsh but do you know how badly I wished for a good safe father for my kids??? And then I see posts like this…
I get annoyed that my daughter’s father doesn’t check on her daily because I couldn’t go a day without her but I would never stop contact with him. It benefits her to see him as much as possible so I won’t prohibit it and I go out of my way to make sure they can see each other as much as possible.
When you leave… its a game changer. Men aren’t usually as involved with kids, like moms are. Sorry but he probably moved on.
He’s gonna walk away completely eventually. I’ve been through it! And nothing was more satisfying than when my oldest boy who is now 25, at 18 when my son was all over the papers & internet for sports, his sperm donor texted him & my son told him to go F himself! I was a single mother for years with no clue where “dad” even was…
Why are you taking his child away from him?
Give your head a shake you are not his keeper let your child see their father!
Ebony Mcilvena remind you of anyone? 
quit using your daughter as a pawn.
Your insistence on him being “consistent” is inappropriate. Your daughter needs her father, whether he meets with your expectations or not. Try to put aside your disappointments for the sake of an innocent child, and bend over backwards to foster the relationship between them. You can go on with your life without him, but a child can never just “go on” without a father.
Let’s cry because he’s not ringing daily I think it’s you that can’t cope with not hearing him everyday if he doesn’t ring why not try ringing him instead it’s not a one way street I would’ve loved to see my dad every weekend but he’s not here anymore
yes you are totally wrong
Why did you have to put the financial information in the post? And why take a child from a parent that is trying? Many women would kill to have a father that gave that much effort
He was being consistent. He doesn’t have to talk to her daily. With my older kids I don’t talk to them daily only the ones still at home with me. It isnt that I don’t love them but that’s life. I have 4 kids and a husband at home and work 2 jobs. I think you should loosen up
How was your electric bill $14,000?
Sounds to me like you want contact for yourself not your daughter. You use her as a bribe tool. My ex tried the same shit and I finally had to tell him do not contact me unless it has to do with our kids.
Honey
My son is 29 . I’m still waiting on his father to do something lol
Yes you’re wrong. Life happens. He’s not obligated to call daily because YOU want him to. You’ll regret holding your child back one day.
No you are Not wrong.
You are not wrong IMO
You wrong. Using a child as leverage. If he was taking her every weekend, and seeing her. Then him not calling during the week is NOT a reason to not let him see his daughter. Sure he’s not a good husband/provider for you, but if he’s wanting his daughter every weekend and being present then, you shouldn’t keep her from him. If she loves her daddy and wants to see him, don’t keep her away because he’s not doing what YOU want.
I totally agree with everyone on here. You are wrong. I have 3 kids ages 37, 35, & 33. Never once did I give their father an ultimatum on when and how many times he should be involved in his children’s life. Nor did I ever bad mouth him in front of the children. This seems like it is more of a problem on how you feel and not thinking how it will effect your your daughters life and relationship with her father. No need to put your daughter in the middle of her parents bad relationship. Show her the Love that you both can coparent whether you two are together or not. All that matters is that this sweet innocent little girl has two parents that love her equally and can show her that love.
Also you could always FaceTime call HIM too, especially if she’s asking or missing him.
You’re relationship has nothing to do with how he parents. Also your complaining about him not contacting 2x daily? Only once or once every two days??? That a pretty good parent seeing he’s not able to see the child, it’s probably hard on him. My child’s father hasn’t contacted her in over 3 years, has never once told her happy birthday, marry Christmas, let alone call 2x in a day. Be happy you aren’t actually dealing with a deadbeat. My child will be 7 in a few weeks, not even 1 happy birthday in 7 years,
Yes you are 100% wrong , let him parent just cause he didn’t wanna pay all our both of your bills doesn’t mean he shouldn’t see his child it means you should’ve helped pay the bills he probably needed assistance from you cause living isn’t cheap. Smh this is ridiculous
U seems like a real asshole, get a job and get off welfare, he probably cut contact bc of you. Sad
You’re realationship… my thing is either the person is all in or not no half way shit. If he wants a realationship with your child then yes he needs to be all in emotionally mentally physically and financially if one parent is struggling then it’s up to the other parent to help I wouldn’t give him an ultimatum but I would def draw boundaries and learn how to co parent. If he doesn’t do anything then ya not cool and I would do the same as you
Does he help support her ? Still try to see her since u have held her away? You are wrong but so is he just both of you in different aspects. My kids dad never call or send support but they will sometimes ask to see them. Yes its wrong and possibly hurting the child but the child will see who does what when they are old nough. Let the child choose how the situation goes.
Legally, yes, you’re wrong. He’s just as much her parent as you are. Meaning, it’s not your place to regulate his interaction. It’s not your place or right. Get a custody order established. You can have calls scheduled into the order. Report when he misses his scheduled visits and/or calls and go from there. If you really have the energy to be so childish.
And just what if it was all turned around?What if you were the mom and had to pay? And the kids were held back from you seeing them? Because for no reason but the courts made it equal.The kids are manipulated by our system and now 38 years and younger ,who’s asking or followed up yearly? Broken. You see this causes problems,and we have people employed who count on our broken .Sick.No accountability for those who disrupt the family .They call that no fault divorce.Fine if there are no children involved.
I can understand your frustration, but whether the support is there or not, and whether he comes around once a week or once a month. He is still her father, and should never be denied that bond. Take a look at your true motivation behind your actions. If it all reflects on your hurt, and not her relationship with her father, then you should change that. Yes there will be disappointments in their relationship, and you feel the need to protect her as you should, but she will grow up one day and she will be able to make up her own mind about her father. Your mistake would be if you make that decision for her now. It may cause a divide in your relationship as she gets older. I wish the best in your situation.
If he cannot act on his word let it go and collect child support.
If there is any way, allow him to keep a close relationship with his daughter. Nothing is more important than that for her. I know your hurt and frustration with his actions, but in the end, you will be glad. I speak from experience. God bless you. Just keep on keepin’ on.
Nope you’re not wrong. Consistency is key for a child and without it comes more hurt. I know from experience.
This is close to my same problem my son’s father never calls or anything maybe once or twice a month n then has the balls to try to take me for custody n then only ended up asking for every other weekend and I said that’s just fine but he needs to be consistent and call our son and have him comfortable enough again to go with him n of course it didn’t matter n he took that first weekend n my son cried n cried n screamed n didn’t wanna go n was like that for the couple times after that and then told me that my ex will leave him there alone my son is 8 and my son said that my ex is allowing his gf to bathe my son a woman he has met only a couple times n obviously he’s not comfortable with that so I declined him his last weekend two weekends ago and told him why and he has not reached out since … But I’m the one wrong rigjtb
My Son 36 and disable and nothing.
If he’s paying his child support and still wants to see her, then the calls shouldn’t be an issue.
Courts don’t even make a parent stay in contact daily. If you can’t co-parent with him then let the court come up with a schedule. Sadly, when parents divorce one parent no longer has daily contact. You have to know though, child support and visitation/custody are separate cases. If he wants to be in her life then let him (unless he is abusive towards her), if you don’t then it could come back to bite you in the end.
U are so wrong and ur motivation is totally selfish. Ur not thinking about the child at all. Children love both parents and it’s not ur right to keep the child from its father because ur hurt. There are plenty of fathers out there that dont care to have anything to do with their kids and urs is calling sometimes twice a day and u think it’s a good idea to keep him away from the child. You shouldn’t even have primary custody. He should because it sounds like he is more concerned with the child instead of getting back at someone for a failed marriage. Again let me say U ARE WRONG ITS NOT UR RIGHT , CHILD IS JUST AS MUCH HIS AS IT IS URS. QUIT ACTING LIKE A SPOILED BRAT THAT DIDN’T GET HER WAY AND START PUTTING UR CHILD FIRST.
My ex calls daily at least once it’s annoying but I deal with it for my kids. But if he stopped for whatever reason but still wanted to take them on weekends I’d absolutely let him. Not calling doesn’t make him a bad dad if he wants to see her he may just not want to deal with you anymore it may hurt or you may have pissed him off. Either way unless he’s hurt her let him be her dad.
Unless you have proof that he is unsafe to be around your daughter, you can’t stop him from seeing his child. That’s your child’s rights not yours. You can’t not add money as part of his inconsistency. Let her make that choice. Is he is toxic then that’s another story but you don’t have any rights to denied her father. Can be backfire someday. Some children will grow up and will chose to live with the other parent. Good luck!
Court Contracts limit to 3 times weekly. So no. I disagree with you.
You are so wrong. Don’t keep the child away from her daddy, and for such a piddly excuse too. You do not get to call the shots just because you left and took her with you. I would be tickled that her daddy wants to spend every weekend with her. Stop being so self righteous.
F him, kids are not free!
I have watched children of friends waiting with back packs for wknd with “dad” more often than not dad is a no show …the untold devestation it does to a child when dad doesn’t keep his word or consistency … psychological damage is huge … children end up messed up develope all kinds of self-esteem issues …you have no obligation to dead beat dad …he has one to your child …if he is gonna mess with your child’s head or heart …kick him to the curb and protect your child’s mental health …I’ll be damned if I will allow some court decide what’s good for my child’s emotional health because of deadbeats “right” yes I won …my kids are grown well adjusted adults cause no lazy man was allowed to play games at their convenience …I hope you read this and it gives you strength… brightest blessings to you and yours 
None of you are reading this post …she said he is inconsistent with the contact
I understand that’s it’s frustrating, but in this instance you have used your child as a pawn in a game of contact.
Life happens, my ex husband doesn’t contact our children every day, but he does have them every other weekend…I would never stop contact for that.
It’s a silly reason, and will actually make you look bad if it went to court…the judge won’t like it
I’m prayers for your family
Unless your daughter is in danger or being told a bunch of lies when she is in his care. Then yes you are in the wrong. Consistency does not have anything to do with seeing her or child support. You can’t force someone to be consistent. At this point it is more about what you want then the child.
Your better off with out him
It hurts but it’s his choice. Nothing you can do
Happens all the time…
Totally wrong to do.
It sucks… I know. I know it’s tougher on you though honey… you don’t want your child to hurt. You will be in our prayers.
Ahh honey. It’s horribly hard, but it happens too often. Stay strong for that sweet boy and just do what’s best for y’all. It’s the guys loss
My ex husband raised my child for 4 years, left one day and never came back.
What pieces of shit.
So sorry for your son.
Sadly you can’t force him to care. If he doesn’t want to step up anymore then screw him. Your sons better off without. Clearly he didn’t really care too much if he can just drop him like that. I’m sorry you’re going through this…
That’s messed up
You deserve better
Run!!! My hubby would never almost 9 years now and he’s lucky to have 2 dads!!!
This is definitely a hard situation and the child is caught in the middle because you weren’t honest about who their father was from the beginning and now his feelings are getting hurt in the process. I would definitely have that conversation with your child because regardless a child deserves to know where and who they came from.
Unfortunately, this happened with my boys, as well. I was married to my second husband for 11 years, and he helped me raise my two boys. When he and I divorced, he completely dumped my boys. He even lied to his family and told them that he still kept in touch with them! So, I know your pain.
Your ex is either trying to hurt you by hurting your son or he was pretending to care in the first place. Both suck, and he should be ashamed of himself!
Hes not much of a man to do that. Have you tried talking to him.
I knew a woman who had 3 children. The first one was her son and his biological father had NEVER been in his life. She met her husband while she was pregnant. That’s the only father all 3 of her children know. When they separated/divorced - this dude went as far as SELLING all the toys he bought the son, the son was 11 at this time. The “dad” would come pick up the girls and not even talk to the son, not answer his calls or text messages. NOTHING.
white baby??? oh my goodness!!! I would be PISSED!!! you and your child is better off without him and his family members.
That is terrible and a crappy way to act but in my mind it shows you his character. Hopefully there will eventually be a better man for both you and your son but if not he doesn’t need someone who doesn’t truly care about him. Your ex’s actions show how he truly feels so I’d just leave it be and let it go. Console your son and help him get through any hurt he has and try to get past it as quickly and with the least amount of pain as possible. Just my opinion good luck to you in your future.
Absolutely not in the wrong but unfortunately there’s not much you can do if the guy doesn’t want to be involved with your other son. Trying to force the guy to be involved may make him walk away from his son too. I’m sure your son is so confused, hurt and doesn’t understand why his “dad” doesn’t want anything to do with him anymore. If the guy doesn’t come around I would try to figure out a kid friendly way of telling him that wasn’t his real dad and about his real dad without being to graphic. Have you talked to the guy about it? Or does he just not care?
Counseling for the child will help but you will have to accept it
that ain’t a man honey. You need to tell his family that. And I would strongly consider making him take you to court for strict child support and strict visitation for his bio son too, because what happens when he meets the next woman? Both your kids are going to be hurt. As for his family? I’d cut them off just like a cancerous growth
It sucks for the child but that is sadly normal. The right person will come along that will think of your kids as his no matter your relationship status but it may be awhile. It takes a special type of person to still be involved with kids that aren’t theirs after a break up.
Sounds like an aweful person. Im so sorry for your child. I would look into thearpy options so your child can cope with this and not have emtional damage from this. Most importantly mamma its not your fault