I understand feeling uncomfortable about it, I’m not one to talk my husband and I both watch porn at times. But only when we’re alone. But I do feel like maybe cutting down isn’t a bad idea, like maybe only when you’re out of the house? I understand if you’re totally against it and if it makes you feel that uncomfortable he should be able to respect that. But open communication to what you’re both comfortable with is definitely important. it can feel like a betrayal if it starts to seem like he’s more interested in watching pord than spending time with you.
How do I post a fan question?
I’ve been with my s/o for over 5 years. We have kids together. I use to not mind. But now he chooses that over me. We haven’t touched in months. So it does hurt a lot knowing he isn’t attracted to me anymore. At least that is the message I am getting from it.
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He has you. Why jerk.off to.porn. your feelings are valid.
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An outside thought: Depending on your situation…the man may also be scared to death to get you pregnant (not ready or not a good situation to bring a child into) if you are not using reliable birth control. He may also be dealing with a health issue. Sometimes prostate problems can be related. In addition, occasionally masturbation is used as an escape from whatever relationship problems are going on in his life. If he is dealing with a stressful situation (in his mind) - this can be a associated with a peaceful release for him, which is not necessarily a bad thing. I know when one partner feels upset all the time (or much of the time or is dealing with a lot of ups/downs) sex can be something that is naturally avoided. Typically this happens with women, but some men can be affected in the same way. Couples are not always on the same page, so-to-speak. Not only is masturbation “normal” but if the person is still there, and around, at least there is some caring on their part because they could be elsewhere. And without barging into the bathroom every time…there is no real way to know if (1) he is actually going to the bathroom at the same time, or (2) whether he is in fact masturbating each and every time. He may just be seeking a quiet place to think, or get away from fighting/arguing, or just a room where he can de-stress alone for a bit. It also helps people relax. So if there are many things going on around him (Covid and the Riots included) he may be worried about many things at once. This may help him. There are so many other things in life to worry about…him doing this really shouldn’t be one of them. https://www.plannedparenthood.org/learn/teens/sex/masturbation
The masturbating while pooping is a little strange.
But masturbating while watching porn in general isn’t. I think masturbation is self care. Both my husband and i watch porn separately and our sex lives together couldn’t be stronger if it tried. I would say that if he’s doing it in place of having sex with you or it seems like its becoming an addiction then I would worry. By no means am I trying to invalidate your feelings. This is just my perspective. One wife to another wife. 
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Honestly…don’t let anyone tell you how you feel. It doesn’t matter what it is, if it’s something that he knows you don’t like and he sneaks to do it, that’s disrespect. I don’t care what anyone says. Doesn’t matter the topic. You guys have to be able to to be open with each other on everything. And it’s a 2 way street. Losing someone’s trust isn’t always over something major. It can start as something small and pile up. My marriage is r perfect but that’s our number 1 rule. And we’ve made it 12 years happily. Once you can cross that obstacle of talking about the awkward things, you are able to be more comfortable and confident in the relationship. And who knows, maybe it will help you not to worry about it so much, or maybe it will help him. But to me, it is still disrespectful because it’s something he feels like needs to be kept a secret from you.
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If it bothers you, it’s not overracting. I watched it before I got with my fiance, but after that I haven’t had any interest in it. He’s not into it either. But we’ve had this conversation on porn boundaries before we moved in together 3 years ago. I’d be upset too especially if he’s doing it every time. He needs to grow a pair and talk to you 
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Um…I highly doubt he’s maturbating while taking a big old crap.
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If it upsets you it upsets you. Nothing wrong at all with your feelings. They’re 100% valid i don’t care if it’s “better than cheating” if you don’t want him to watch it, he should respect how you feel.
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Seems like you have different ideas on what porn and masturbation mean to each other. But what is normal for you may not be for him and vice versa.
Personally I can’t count how many times I’ve walked in on my husband’s alone time. Sometimes I offer to help, sometimes I just leave him to it. It doesn’t bother me because I believe it normal. Just like sometimes I enjoy my alone time. He understands that too.
Just have a grown up conversation with him, open-honest-nonjudging. You might learn a few things from each other.
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Men are just visual. It can become an addiction. But still, you’re feelings are valid.
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I’d be upset too. While he’s pooping haha he’s a odd ball. Lmfao
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At the beginning of our relationship he had some magazines so I asked him about it. So then I decided to watch on tv with him. 20 years later our relationship could not be any better.
If your curious you should join him. If your upset then you to need to talk.
One thing I learned in our marriage is be best friends w your partner and do your best to support and respect each other.
In your situation is it intimidating for you?
You must feel confident and seeing other beautiful women your husband is watching has to be mutual.
Be open and you will have the best sex life w your partner.
If not your choice.
Man and woman porn I don’t like so we watch just girls.
Everyone is different
Good luck it will work out!!
Maybe He like the feel of the poop against his gspot - stick your finger in his bum 
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Bet he doesn’t last in bed! 
because mine does the same shit!
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You’re allowed to feel how you want to feel. The best you can do is wait for him to be alright to open up and talk to you about it.
I don’t think I’d really be that upset. My hubs is with me and they are just people recording themselves.
I don’t think it should be a problem unless it is affecting your sex lives. If your sex life together has changed, I don’t see a problem and I think you are overreacting.
I’ll be the black sheep here. If he’s doing it every single time he goes to the bathroom, he’s an addict. That’s an excessive amount of porn (and masturbation) and that’s totally unhealthy. As far as him not wanting to talk about it? Too. Friggin. Bad. He married you, time to pony up and do the hard shit like talk to your spouse about awkward things. He’s an adult, he will survive. It doesn’t matter if porn is a widely-accepted thing, if it bothers YOU, that’s what matters. We compromise with our SO’s based on what they are and aren’t comfortable. Love is a two way street.
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Sometimes it’s just nice to have some self care, masturbating isn’t the same as sex. And there are times when my husband and I would rather beat off then have sex together, and there’s nothing wrong with that.
I personally don’t see an issue with him watching porn.
just guess, but why are you uncomfortable with it? Is it your own insecurities that you’re not enough? If so I think you need to work on that.
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Whatever keeps the dude off me:woman_shrugging:t4:
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Guys start masturbating at a very young age…it’s perfectly normal! While pooping…??? That’s weird…he’s probably not pooping…lol
Watching porn is also normal for the vast majority! Male and Female…
If it’s affecting your sex life…then you have a problem…if it’s not…good lord…leave the man alone! Maybe try watching with him…it can be fun…
Or watch by yourself…chances are if he knows you’re watching it too, he will be more inclined to want to watch with you!
(Married 20 yrs here)
Good luck!
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The only time it bothers me is when we are both home and we could be doing things together.
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I know a guy that does it while he poops, he tells everyone I always thought it was weird but now I know others do it lolol! As for my husband and I, we both watch porn and do our own things and have an awesome sex life. 13 years strong 
Nothing wrong with it. Definitely over reacting IMO. Never understood why this was a big deal to some.
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Maybe tell him to stop doing it in the restroom and join him on watching it. Maybe some for-play will be good for your relationship
I was the same way it bothered the living hell out of me cause he has perfectly good pussy in bed but can’t even have sex with me. I got tired of it until One day I told him I’m going to start watching porn and it bothered him so we had talk and now we watch it together! 
honestly it’s just insecurities at least for me it was. I say do whatever you think makes you feel sexy and just roll with it. Fake it till you make it. 
Maybe if you try and do it for him , it would take the awkwardness out of it
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No one has the right to tell someone else to stop masturbating…it is their body and just the fact they are married does not give her the right to tell him what to do/not do with his own body. And just the same with a man/woman. It may seem excessive, but if you read the above links…it can be very normal. Someone else may feel uncomfortable about it…but just being married doesn’t give someone the right to make the other person stop something like this. Maybe she needs to get over it. Worry about other things. Maybe he is doing it excessively, but without a hard number being reported, that is hard to tell. Only a licensed counselor could really tell something like that. One person may freak out about someone doing it daily. But if you read articles about this…that can be a normal, necessary thing for several reasons. If she starts nagging him or fighting with him about it or trying to force him to stop…she may actually cause more damage to the relationship or the end result could be he actually does it more. It is always a stress release, no matter who does it. So, in a way, be grateful because maybe that is what helps him get through the day. It could be drugs, alcohol, or cheating. This is NOT cheating (read the articles above). There are so many bad things someone could be into. She may not like porn (many people don’t) but maybe she could offer to watch it sometimes with him as a concession and see if that makes a difference. But many people watch porn on their own. It IS normal for some people. It just kinda sounds like there are other issues in their relationship and so maybe SHE should seek out a counselor to help her navigate how she feels on her end and can learn more about how to deal with their other issues and how to cope/navigate what is going on with the porn/masturbation. It couldn’t hurt.
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I’m sorry, but I think it’s weird that you asked this question on Facebook.
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let the man have a wank it’s not that hard … being upset over it is a problem with you and not him. You are not his only sexual gratification.
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I sometimes watch porn without my SO. And sometimes we watch it together. Just depends on you and your relationship. I know my man isnt wishing that he was with someone else and he knows I don’t want anyone else. Sometimes I just wanna get off real quick hehe
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My view is if he’s Intimate with you when the time comes and y’all are keeping each other happy in that area it’s fine. Sometimes it’s okay to reach that climax by yourself. Cuz sometimes the best person to do that job is you cuz you know what you want. While pooping is weird though 
it’s also okay to ask to join or just watch 
I hope that helps
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I dealt with that issue too. It’s not fun, I dont have any great advice cause the porn never stops
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I don’t see an issue unless he is refusing to have sex. Me and my man have matching shirts that say “I 
PORN” lol.
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Girl I didn’t have time to read any comments maybe I’m weird but I don’t let my man watch porn or masterbate everyone has a opiin I think he a scum bag why do you have to hide and play with your dick is your old lady not good enough you would rather sit on a toilet wack your own self then have your girl suck play with it fuck girl your beautiful you don’t need this scum bag just my thoughts
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I masturbate to porn while in a relationship but that’s me! I’m also not insecure with myself or don’t feel that I’m not enough if my partner watches porn either… if my partner told me he didn’t like that I did that or tried to shame me in anyway for watching porn I’d let him know that he wasn’t the right person for me bc you shouldn’t shame your partner for anything let alone an intimate/embarrassing topic as that. I don’t hide things or try to be sneaky about things in a relationship either so it would definitely be a deal breaker. I will not allow another persons insecurities control me or make me feel insecure about myself. This is my opinion, other people tolerate such things. Life’s too short to spend it unhappy, insecure, or shamed by anything.
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Had an ex that would download porn while he was at work. Really hurt my self esteem and never stopped. I have no advice just hope it works out for you
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KareBear Adams in a way I see what you mean it is our bodies but you sound dumb as fuck you telling me you let your old man play with himself all day long girl no offense obviously your not giving your dude what he needs no man I know masterbates by himself when he has a bitch why would he you honestly think if your fucking him good instead of fucking you he rather fuck himself get the fuck out of here you gav3 her stupid advice if you don’t give a fuck or can’t tell your man not to fuck himself you are not giving him some good sex believe that shit
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Dont touch the doinker if ur not going to boink her lol that what i go with.
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Porn doesn’t bug me, but the way yours is doing it is gross.
There IS a cure for this-- when he,s sleeping-- set his balls on fire-- (smiley face here )
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Over reacting… since this is quite a taboo subject we have a tendency to react but it is quite normal to masterbate and obliging the one you share your life with to not do it is against nature… let him and explore yourself too.
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Put on some porn and enjoy with him.
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I was like that until I had a baby and got on birth control. We use to have sex at least 3 times a day. Now it 2 times a week. Lol he always wants to have sex my birth control made my sex drive go away. I dread having sex And having a baby wears me out…When the baby is sleeping I want to be left ALONE! As much as I hate him watching porn I got tired of having sex and told him to watch it that I no longer cared. I’m much happier now best choice ever lol
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Talk to him. Porn can come between couples and rob you of intimacy. If he’s getting pleasure elsewhere could it be taking away from you?
Are you giving it to him? Tried exploring kinkiness?
What is it with issues about porn & masterbation??? Leave him alone! You can’t dictate every thing the man does. Your insecurity has to do with your way of thinking about yourself not his way of masturbating.
Now the poor guy has to whack where he shits. That’s gross.
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Maybe I’m not insecure, maybe that isn’t the right word but … Why do women feel so threatened by a man masturbating? It’s literally him and his own genitalia…
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If he’s doing that more than he’s sleeping with you, then yes it’s an issue.
Personally, I consider it cheating. Because I’m not okay with it.
But to each their own.
If it’s bothering you, then you need to make him talk about it and express your discomfort.
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My boyfriend has a way higher sex drive then me. So we still have sex. But if he wants to rub one out I’ve gotten over the fact he watches porn. I’d rather that then him walking around with a boner all the time.
If it bothers you, you’re not overreacting. It’s a valid topic for discussion.
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My bf does it but honestly we don’t always see each other as much as we like lately… he’s frontline worker and I have kiddos so he’s been staying w his parents to lessen the risk to my kiddos.
I finally gave in and let him record a few adult activities and he now uses that when he feels he needs too. I’d rather it be me but I’m glad that he’s only watching and not actually cheating w someone else.
I’m mean… who gets them selves off WHILE 
. Thats gross…
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It’s his body. Not your choice.
No matter what anyone says. Not ALL men do it and just being a man is not a excuse to do something your partner is uncomfortable with. Period. And it is completely OK to not like your man watching porn.
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Girls need to not be such a prude and overreact when it comes to porn. Just my opinion. Spice up your relationship and watch it with him. How often are you guys intimate? If you keep him satisfied he may not watch it.
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I have to put this out there. I think everyones opinion is fair so I’m just gonna put mine out there. In my world that’s a no. It makes me feel like I’m not good enough or my body is not good enough. My thought is well if u need that to turn you on then what am I here for. Your feelings are valid. Listen to how you want to go about this especially if its bothering you.
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Just leave him do it. Its just porn. Also I think personally its unreasonable for a woman to demand a man doesn’t. Let him have his release. I think you might have to let it slide. Though if it does get to a point that it’s excessive or illegal yeh then there’s an issue. I honestly think it’s bad to tell a man that he can’t touch his own body. You’re entitled to feel secure but I really think it’s an issue you just have to move on from.
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Don’t let your own insecurities (because that is what is behind the people saying “no” and feeling not good enough), ruin a good relationship. IF you want to stay together…seek out some counseling to help with your feelings and go from there!
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i feel if he needs to watch another women naked having sex with others then u don’t need him at all . porn is fucking disgusting period
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Reading these comments and realizing how unhealthy some of these peoples sex lives are is really sad
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Am I the only one who watches it with my Husband ? I mean it gives you ways to try different positions and stuff . I don’t see a problem with it as long as he’s open about it 
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Porn addiction is real. To me it is no different than cheating if a significant other is getting sexual gratification from watching another person. The partner should be that person for them…it caused a lot of problems for me in one of my relationships. It made me feel inadequate.
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I think you have every right to feel that way. I don’t think it has anything to do with whether you satisfy him or not. It’s not a need, and he should respect that it makes you uncomfortable.
I’m sorry that you have to have that struggle.
I definitely think you guys should talk about it though. See what his reasons are and how you can prevent it or improve the situation so you are comfortable too
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I think its not good for a relationship if he’s choosing porn over real relationship and intimacy, and can become an addiction .
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im not knocking ANYONES relationships but I I feel like if you have an issue with it your husband shouldn’t watch it. He should be lifting u up not making you feel some type a way. I mean for those that are okay with it like i said do u. But if yall aren’t on the same page then this is one of those comprises you make in marriage. wife happiness for a life time vs 15 mins or however long of his in the moment happiness.
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It was there first friend leave them alone!
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If you guys are still having sex then it’s all good. If he has replaced your intimate time together with that then no…
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If you can’t talk about a topic of sex and something that makes you feel uncomfortable in your relationship then you need to have a different discussion all together about what you both expect out of the relationship and what your likes and dislikes are and get to know each other all over again.
Me and my husband can talk about everything from masturbation to periods and how his shit was. Nothing should be uncomfortable if you can’t be open with the person you are wanting to spend the rest of your life with it should make you think. Don’t get me wrong my husband and I do keep somethings to ourselves but nothing to hid like masturbation or porn. We don’t personally care for it but it has been a topic of conversation.
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How do yoi know he does it every time he goes to the bathroom… tf are you doing sitting there watching a grown ass man go to the bathroom??? Hes watching porn. Not cheating. Watch it with him. Learn some shit.
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This is my favourite comment section ever:joy: ! If my SO does it while I’m home, I tell him he should’ve came to me first, but he does it while I’m at work sometimes then whatever 
but as for the porn, surprise him one night and turn it on for the two of you to watch and enjoy yourselves… you’ll be surprised, you might actually enjoy it
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sex with one person regardless of love get boring.
I think porn is fine. My partner and I even discussed watching together
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I would rather my husband beat off to porn then finding a stranger on webcam to beat off too.
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I am 18 weeks with our second baby, been together 4 years and at this point I almost prefer him to masturbate…I know he misses the intimacy but I’m just so run down lately that I can’t
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I don’t like it however I don’t completely dislike it. Every once in a while (if im not home) I don’t mind. However if im downstairs cooking dinner for us and the family and he’s upstairs wanking to some tiny wasted blond hair green eyed girl getting pounded by a bunch of big buff guys then yes I’ve got an issue. I’ve got my own mental issues without thinking im not what he wants or im not pretty enough or skinny enough. If im not good enough for him then he’s not good enough for me. Me and my man of 4 years as I stated in a previous comment have been having sex for 3 and a half years. He was my first. I’ve yet to become bored of him or want porn over him. We’ve tried watching together earlier on in our relationship and it just made me jealous. And he understood that for the most part. I don’t like him watching porn and masturbating all the time and he’s not okay with me doing it either. You need to have a talk and get an understanding on the issue. Maybe your sex drive has decreased a lot recently and he (needs) more but doesn’t want to bother you or make you feel bad.
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Hell nooo my husband did the same and i told him you do that shit once more and i will divorce tou because why does he have tp look at other woman when he is married it is cheating as simple as that … my husband did it again and i took my stuff and left needless to say he hasent done it aince i gave him the scare of leaving with my son
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Mistreating is a very personal thing. Not everyone is comfortable talking about it. You are not entitled to the control of his bodily functions regardless of if they are by choice. Leave it alone or leave him. Thus will be a constant thing. He will just get more secretive and closed off about it. It’s not going to stop.
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is it hurting you or interrupting your sex life? than dont worry about it. all guys do it, even if you keep him sexed up.
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Honestly before me and my SO got together we both watched it. As we first were dating we still watched. At a certain point in the relationship we both discussed and agreed together we wouldn’t watch anymore. Me and him have a pretty open relationship which makes it easier to talk to each other. Hope you and your SO can figure it out!
I feel like if it really bothers you yes try to talk to him about it but the way I see it is there would be no way in hell my SO could tell me I can’t touch my own body…
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All those saying “my man doesnt watch it” or “my man doesnt masterbate” are cracking me up. I promise you, he probably does. Just not when you’re around & ending whole relationships bc your man watched another girl? If hes watching a regular movie and a titty come on the screen and he looks, is that also considered cheating? 
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If it’s something that bothers you and you have told him it upsets and you have told him you would like him to stop, if he respected that he would stop. Are you still having sex together? If you are then atleast he’s substituting sex with porn. I would get him to sit down and talk with you and discuss how it makes you feel ask him if the shoe was on the other foot how would he feel? Find out why he feels the need to watch it every time he uses the bathroom. Maybe try making a video together
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Personally I’d have no problem with it. I watch porn quite a lot and masturbate if my partners not around, it’s my me time. Sometimes you just need to focus on yourself and not someone else x
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I had the same issues with my honey the first 2 years of our 7 year relationship. Finally I sat him down and explained to him why it bothered me. How it made me feel.
I told him I feel as if he needs pleasure from other women. And once he gets tired of watching it on tv he will go out and find it. It was a long argument and took a while but now he is 5 yrs clean lol
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I think counseling would be beneficial for you as well as working on personal development. It is natural to masturbate. Men are visual. It’s a picture or a video … I agree if it is affecting your sex life or he is so consumed it has become an addiction that would be an issue. To each their own but mybadvice is to get to the root of why it bothers you so much.
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EVERY time? Whilst he poops seems weird to me partners need to respect some boundaries if it’s that excessive I’d say calm it down abit? First and foremost talk to him about it.
At least he is at home. Guys are guys. They only think of getting the task done to resolve the immediate situation. Don’t take it personally. I’m sure y’all have a great relationship and if him going to the bathroom once a day to get the job done instead of bugging you then, so what. Sex with the same person after a while does get boring, no matter how good you are.
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I don’t understand this. Why is it an issue ? Everyone is entitled to some personal time. This is a natural thing that both females and males do and have done since puberty. Sounds like an insecurity that you and him need to sit down and talk about.
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I think it’s a bit sad that he has to lock himself in the bathroom to do it whilst taking a . It’s pretty natural and I don’t see an issue with it. Like others have said anyone that thinks their man or woman doesn’t do it are in denial. Everyone does it and I think it’s healthy
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Personally I think its normal. The internet has made it so easily accessible. I would just ask why does it bother you. Does it make you feel less than or not desirable? What about it makes you upset. Because masturbation is normal and personal and unless its harming your sex life, making a big deal about this will shame your partner all because you are insecure, which is your problem. Maybe he wanted some but thought you wouldn’t or knew it wasn’t a good time. Maybe he was bored. But it really doesnt mean that it has anything to do with you. Hes just taking care of himself without you, and that’s allowed. So again is it the porn or the hiding it or him not involving you that bothers you.
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Am I the only woman in the world who doesn’t mind if her significant other does this?
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Well my guy and I have great sex life… however I still want it more often than he does so I take care of it myself… every day I don’t get sex from him I will grab my vibe and watch a quick video… quick and efficient… and I always feel less stressed and in a better mood… and I don’t consider myself an addict… just kinda changed as I turned 40…
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The more you push him to stop the more he is going to continue to do it would you rather him just leave and sleep with random women or watch bitches on tv?
If you’re seriously that bothered by it you guys will never last… so instead of badgering him over watching tits on his phone, offer to watch it with him and role play
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I feel like it shouldn’t be something either of u avoid talking about. As well have you tried it? Try it together? Who knows u may like it
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The man did it before you got together so why can’t he still do it now? Woman watch porn too. The main issue I have of this post is why is he doing …his sexual needs whilst pooping. Now that, needs addressing…
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Lol only here for the comments. These are so funny!!
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In truth disregard what ever anyone els is saying it’s particular to your own relationship what both of you feel comfortable with, also why he dose it. If it makes you uncomfortable then you should talk about it if your still uncomfortable then he shouldn’t do it. Also he shouldn’t self love more then he gives to you then it stops being more of a relationship and becomes more of an everyone for themselves kinda thing and that’s less then what you deserve
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Not a huge issue if you both do it. Not a huge issue if you are still having sex. But even if the two aforementioned happen, and it bothers you… it bothers you. You cant help that. You need to talk about it WITH HIM. Are you afraid you’re going to embarrass him? Yall see each other naked, you’re in a committed relationship and he should take your worries or insecurities seriously no matter of they seem trivial to someone else or not. I dont think Porn is a terrible thing for some, but honestly it can get out of control. TALK TO HIM!