Go with your instincts he’s deffooo hiding something!! I’d tell him that he either tells you the truth or he can fk right off tbh xx
I’m sorry but he’s cheating, if not physically cheating you know he’s playing along with her.
I call BS too. I think your gut is telling you what you need to know. Always trust your gut.
NOBODY at work should have any personal information like that to include his cell phone number and where yall live unless he’s given it out. Me personally, Id be done. After I let his work HR know the things shes doing.
No! He definitely erased messages when he didn’t let you go through them for a few days, and she drove by and he lied about it? 
This is exactly how my marriage ended. A factory whore making my husband feel free again. His words not mine. Being a husband and a new father was too hard for him. She was there to listen to his lies. I wouldn’t trust him just like you. You have every right to feel betrayed and less trusting. If there was nothing to hide he would let you see his phone. And why the hell does she know how long it takes to get to your house?? And the picture speaks a thousand words. There is no reason for a man in a relationship to have a picture of another woman! Get things in order for you and your baby and scoot scoot!
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Girrrrrllll…throw the whole man away. He wants to carry on a boundary crossing flirty friendship (at best, cheating at worst) then give him the benefit of being the one to drop his ass so he’s free to spend the rest of his miserable life with Susan. Once the excitement of being sneaky is gone…he will be miserable. He doesn’t respect her. She is just exciting because she is flirty, wanted and off limits.
That is crossing a huge line… especially when there is KNOWN HISTORY of her doing it to others. Nah sis drop him. Move out and move on. You deserve better. My man would nvr disrespect me like that. If a female text m/calls/messages him he tells me and vise versa. She knows where you live?? She’s getting pictures of YOUR child. Nope cheating isn’t just physical. It starts out emotional and just like this.
Kick him out. He can go live with her if he’d rather put her before his family.
Exactly, why would he even give her his number and have hers in his phone…that’s a nono
Drop him off at her house and change the locks on yours
They’re definitely sleeping together… I would go visit him up at work, and ask in front of EVERYONE, why she feels the need to text and send indecent photos to your man… Embarrass both of them, and then leave his a$$… You and your child deserve better than what these two d@uchebags are doing to you!
P.S… to all the women saying that this woman isn’t responsible at all for going after a taken man, “just blame the man” at what point do you think this woman should be responsible for HER actions? IF YOU KNOW THAT A MAN IS TAKEN, AND YOU STILL GO AFTER HIM, NOT ONLY IS HE G@RBAGE, BUT SO ARE YOU!!! I sure wish these people would quit giving these disrespectful women a pass, just so they can use that d@mb a$$ phrase “she doesn’t owe you any loyalty”, true, but that doesn’t give $k@nks a free pass to hurt whoever they want… In most cases, it’s the women that coin this phrase, who are out there messing around with taken men, and use that as an excuse to somehow try to make themselves sound and feel innocent…
THEY ARE BOTH GROWN ADULTS, AND THEY ARE BOTH RESPONSIBLE FOR THEIR OWN ACTIONS!!!
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Lying is all it takes to be cheating
Run for the nearest exit.
Following your gut feeling …
“Whos marriage she imploded” … takes 2 to tango
I didn’t have to read the whole thing and know their more than just co workers. I was married and met this guy at work and left home bc I had more in common with him and spent more time at work than home. So from experience it’s happening
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Well for starters, why is the girl a homewrecker? It takes two to tango, and if your boyfriend and his colleague were faithful, she wouldn’t get anywhere hitting on both. There’s always going to be temptation, if your boyfriend cannot handle it properly we’ll thats on him I’d say. You guys have to stop blaming the other person, it’s your partner who made bad choices in regards to your relationship.
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First off…anyone telling you what to do or saying it’s obvious…is wrong. You have to decide what’s best, and it sounds like you have decided. But, I have found in a good relationship you do not need to try and limit who your SO has contact with, and you shouldn’t try. Are there things you mentioned that were concerning, of course. But…take a step back, let calmer heads prevail and think over the whole situation and go from there.
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1- if she’s single, she can sleep with whoever she wants and with as many people as she wants. Doesn’t make her some kind of evil entity (although it’s easier for people to blame things on external factors. Harder to believe the person you’ve had children with could just be a shitty person.)
2- people deciding to cheat are who implode marriages. If it wasn’t her it’d be someone else.
3- this is your partners fault, stop trying to push the blame onto someone else.
He’s making the choice to be friends with her inspite of you being uncomfortable.
Regardless of if he’s cheating, the fact he’s chosen to disrespect you is enough.
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All red flags honey. Trust your gut!! He’s lying to you
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Look him dead in his eyes and tell him to stop playing with you …your gonna only tell him once that he better choose wisely …let him know that your gonna have a conversation with her and him and if you find out that they’ve been communicating YOUR GONE
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Wait up. She drove past your house honking her horn. The fact she knows where you guys live first red flag, but to be confident enough to beep oh this woman is trouble, and sorry to say sweetie sounds like she may already have him. She sounds toxic.
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While a Calm conversation say something like, “ you told me “Susan “ rode almost every guy at work. I was always taught that any man that has slept with someone like her, has technically has slept with everyone she has slept with. I wouldn’t was sloppy seconds, thirds, fourths, etc. I guess she likes braking up marriages for fun. Look how she moves on after each game”. That might get him thinking.
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Break up with him.
Let him find out if the other woman is worth it.
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You should definitely be pissed. If there’s nothing to hide why not tell the truth from the beginning? Why is this Susan so thirsty? She knows your situation with your partner obviously. I had a similar problem and ending up finding out there was flirting and inappropriate conversations going on behind my back so you should definitely nip their relationship in the bud and make sure they’re distant cause she has no boundaries or respect it seems.
She’s obviously not happy, or she wouldn’t be doing this. Ultimatums are tricky. Make friends with her. (I know, but may stop her). Make friends w/bf’s co-workers. These are just suggestions.
Hinestly same I would gliped out at first then we would talk about it but my bf always lets me look at messages if I’m feeling insecure that day and we would of talked and he would try to stay away as much as possible and the drive by are so weird my oppinion that’s work almost coming home so
You are Not overreacting…Him filling you in about this woman n describing her how she’s a home wrecker etc etc was only to plant the seed in ur head, case he would ever get caught with her in the future. This way u would already see her as a bad person and believe his lies. I’m sorry you’re going thru this but I believe he’s being unfaithful.
Invite her over for dinner and drinks, invite some of your other friends, single male friends, or that volatile loud mouth friend you have, the one that knows what’s going on, then as the night goes on, wait for the right moment and call her out about how close she is with your husband, make sure your loud mouth friend is in shot, and also your partner and see the wreckage unfold. Or take it upon yourself and tell a few people within ear shot that you think her wake up calls are sweet because you don’t have to use your alarm as you see and read every one of those messages. This woman loves to fuck people’s shit up. So call her out in front of strangers (to her) and make her realise she needs to grow up and leave your man alone! If he openly defends her, pack his shit, at least the people you invited will see just what is going on. And if your volatile friend is on to it they will show her the door.
If this makes you feel like some one punched you in the gut, or your heart is broken or you can’t breathe your body is telling you something isn’t right. A woman’s intuition is usually right on the money. I would have your husband ask her over to meet her and see how they get along or show up at his work for a surprise lunch date with you and the kids. You will see with your own eyes what’s going on and then you will have your answer. My husband works with women all day. I trust him I don’t trust the women. And if you want to know the truth most of the women don’t care if he is married with children or not. Talk to him let him know how this is making you feel and if it really bothers you have a long long talk before it goes any further. Good Luck. I wish the best for you. 
I see there is no guys here. Im gonna help yall out. the fact that she is trying really hard to get his atettion should tell you his been behaving. If you milk the bull every morning and keep him well fed and your not poking him his not gonna leave you. If he says theres nothing believe him he even let you see the texts.
Nope same crap happened to me turned out he was cheating the entire time lying to my face & all while I was pregnant with our second child. He dated her for almost 5 years after then turned around & cheated on her with a girl younger than me (the first girl was much older than both of us) then I had to play therapist with him for our kids sake cause I found out about him cheating on the girl from our daughter. It’s a mess your feelings are valid I wish I’d listened to mine in the beginning
What I’m wondering is why everyone is saying to immediately put him on child support when she leaves? Child support has nothing to do with a man cheating. Now if she leaves him and he doesn’t regularly help out with their child then yes child support is understandable but it sounds like alot of women would just do that out of spite which is just gross 
women with primary custody of children already get an insane amount of help from the government as it is. Health insurance, food stamps etc… and the men don’t get any of that so as long as a man is actively in their child’s life, keeps them every week, helps get them what they need then they shouldn’t have to hand over a dime in child support in my opinion 
Can we say “red flags” … what kind of guy befriends a home wrecking 
bicycle:rofl: without intention of sleeping with her… 
Do what’s right for your toddler and for yourself and get out of that toxicity!
Not saying it’s the same, but in my personal experience there is a few red flags there and I would not trust it one bit. He has already hidden things from you, specifically that he was texting her and that he didn’t want you to scroll through the messages even though he told you she is the promiscuous girl at work. He could easily delete certain messages within a few days depending on the phone he has. Be careful with that and I wish you luck.
As someone who had her husband cheat on her with the ‘office bicycle’… trust your instincts!!! our marriage might not make it. squash it before it goes that far. my poor son didn’t deserve any of it and is the only reason I haven’t thrown his ass to the curb already
Can you afford a private investigator? See if they can do a few hours of surveillance for you and when the proof is in your hand, you show him the proof and then show him the door! It hurts but best to rise above it. Been there after 32 years of marriage and 3 children. 
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sounds like you already made your decision. You don’t trust him and he is hiding the fact that they were more than co workers even if they are just friends. You have to decide if you want to stay with someone that you do not trust.
It takes two
When u claim she has wreck homes he should no better
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He’s definitely cheating, your scared for your future unless your the one with all the assets. If not start hiding money, he is. Start packing stuff slowly, his or yours if you’re going to stay in the home. Lawyer up with a great lawyer. Its hard but you have to be smart, when your ready make your move. Just make sure you have the means to take care of you and your family. Good luck.
I would leave mama. You’re not overreacting. I think you know the answer deep down, but don’t want to believe it. I’ve been there.
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Trust me, where there is smoke, there is fire. This is coming from the person that unfortunately started my own fires in my previous relationship. 
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I’m sorry to have to tell you, at the very least he’s having an emotional affair. This happened to me, and it’s nothing short of devastating. It’s extremely common, and what happens is the person who is in it, thinks nothing of it, initially, as it’s only talking. Many times it leads to more. There are two ways this can go. One is you confront him and he comes clean, although coming clean initially entails only admitting it, but not being 100% honest as they don’t want to admit how badly they messed up. Even in the best case scenario, it’s an uphill battle that will take years to repair. The other scenario is that he continues to deny as he is in too deep and he knows admitting it means it has to stop. At this point, the affair, whether emotional or physical, is an addiction as he gets a hit when they interact. I highly recommend googling “is my husband having an emotional affair?”. Only you know what’s right for you and my thoughts are with you. I highly recommend you find someone you trust to be a support for you during this time. The tricky part is finding someone who will support you if you and your boyfriend decide to try to work things out.
Girl trust your damn gut!!! That’s all I gotta say. They’re always going to say you’re overreacting because they want to try to flip it back on you and make you overthink you actions or thoughts instead of thinking about the situations.
I left and took three kids raised them and left that same shi*t in the dust 30 years ago…My kids never heard me talk shit about their dad and I NEVER received child support …I just had enough of the toxicity and did what needed to be done …When you have had enough of his Sh you will be ready wo asking advice on fb… Your gut tells you what this is and your not blind to it obviously then you have to decide where the line in the sand will be drawn for you …Good Luck pray for the best for you and your kid…
Imagine leaving your bf because the internet told you to. He hid it because you made it a problem for him to even talk to his coworker (someone he has to see/interact with) this sounds like a lot of hearsay. But you must not love him if you’d leave him because you “think” he cheated or will. The internet will only reinforce your anxiety bc most ppl on here are bitter. 
In retrospect He should’ve known you’re insecure and never brought her up in the first place. Now you taught him to never talk to you about stuff. Congrats lol
I think you have every right to be pissed I would be too… pissed me off just reading it ! Go with your gut… it is right. If he hasn’t already cheated …he will …ALL the classic signs are there ! do what you gotta do hun !
My daughters father is now married to the company bicycle so… I’d start thinking of a way out.
You’ve got every right to be mad. If a guy won’t let you read texts after being caught already on some stuff, he’s hiding more. I’m sorry you’re going through this. It’s inappropriate to even text her after what he said. And to know where he lives and how long. Goodness. I’m sorry.
The fact that it took him two days to let you read the texts is also very telling. Plenty of time for him to go through and delete what made him look bad. The fact that he told you what kind of person she was…and then still went and had a SECRET friendship with her is a big no for me too.
I would be taking a little stroll to the work place and put her in her place …or on he ass depending on how pissed I was when I got there
Completely inappropriate. Your feelings are valid. You said your boundaries from the jump and he did what he wanted to anyway
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Trust your instincts; think about your options; do what’s best for your child. Your man is hurting you regardless of whether or not he is cheating. Nothing he is doing is being done to reassure you. If you’re asking me, take your kid and split.
Red flags every where! I’ve dated this type. Stopped dating after this type. All the same excuses my ex had and they were sleeping together I found out after I dumped him. Follow your instincts they are usually correct. Ask him to leave.
I would leave him! He is being friends with her and loyal to her and not to you if he didn’t want you to see his texts he is definitely hiding something. He doesn’t deserve you and you don’t deserve him. Break up with him and get yourself a REAL man!
You are right about the way you are feeling. His behavior is disrespectful to you and your child.
Sounds like you have a good head in your shoulders.
I would suggest that you seek counseling, to help you with guidance through the situation you are dealing with.
If she’s ruining your relationship then your partner invited her and allowed her in. Time for a new partner.
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Having been though this exact thing when my wife was hiding emails deleting call logs all the same stuff I was blinded by what we once had or maybe I thought we had maybe she never did . I should have put a stop to it way sooner every one in my Family would have been a whole lot better off today
Trust your gut. If your gut says something is going on 9 times out of 10 there is. My ex used to do this to me all the time. It’s not worth the heartache and feeling like you’re crazy. I guarantee you, you’re not crazy. Your ex is gaslighting you. And at a minimum he is disregarding your feelings. Is being “friends” with the coworker more important than your feelings? If he is putting her feelings or whatever before yours there’s something wrong. Also, if he’s telling you you’re crazy, you’re not! He’s saying you’re crazy or whatever because he doesn’t want you to catch on to what he’s doing.
What I don’t understand is people who have children with boyfriends.
Dude he is GASLIGHTING you!!! This is so sketchy! There shouldn’t be any secrets or anything like this going on in your relationship. You should be able to look at all the messages (but you should never be in a situation where that’s even necessary… you should feel one hundred percent that you can trust him and thus not even desire or feel the need to check his messages) I went through stuff like this before. Now my partner and I literally have each other’s faces in our iPhones to unlock them with facial recognition not so we can go through each other’s phones but bc we use each other’s phones all the time to change music or look stuff up and it’s just easier to use facial rec than keep typing in passwords. Like we have zero secrets or anything mysterious and that’s how it should be
Why are you even going on about this, you know what’s going on so your ok with it. Just get your self together and leave, you don’t have to make a scene . If he’s doing this now ,He’ll do it again, plus he could give you STD. Sorry, I just won’t let myself be used , or disrespected.
In my opinion i would be gone no waiting no need to have proof the ling texting is enough said and her picture and driving by very much says something is going on. Him being secretive and defensive also another indicator on infidelity and not trustworthiness on his part.
I went thru the same thing several yrs ago and you have every right to be mad and telling him to stop texting
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You clearly layed out a boundary with this chick for good reason and he crossed the boundary. It seems pretty simple to me.
Sounds like this woman is playing a game with your marriage, she has obviously done this before, your husband needs to ask himself: Does he want to lose everything over a woman who is playing a game and when she ends the game where he loses everything including her and ends up with nothing except paying child support.
He let you look at the text a few days later simply so he had time to erase the ones he didn’t want you to see, come on you don’t realize that??? And of course he’s screwing her…
By the time he let you scroll through those texts, he had already deleted all of thenad ones. Trust your gut. Something is up
He already told you she’s a 'homewrecker …doesn’t sound good, from where I sit
He let you go thru later cuz he deleted certain ones . RED FLAG especially if you voiced how you didn’t want him talking to her yet he went behind your back and did anyway
He’s gaslighting you. From your post, it seems very obvious that there IS definitely something going on.
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Trust your gut, he won’t let you look for a reason. He needs time to get his story straight and delete what he needs to.
Sit him down & ask him how he would feel if it were you not him
A few days later he had time to delete the incriminating texting and keep the normal ones .
If you haven’t recognized it yet , you are simply getting “burned”
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A friendship is platonic. A friend is someone you bring home and share the relationship openly. Otherwise, the relationship is something other than platonic.
how would he feel if the shoe was on the other foot??? would he be very trusting???
he sent pictures of your kid?? did I read that right? he’s planning on leaving you and taking the kid…
Don’t stay with someone you can’t trust , it’ll do more damage to you mentally than just leaving and having to deal with life by yourself
Plan your exit. Make sure you take his money to fix your new life and start over ! Play the fool and then watch him - it will be every entertaining to see him uncomfortable !
He went through 3 computer, lap top ,through it down the basement steps and the 2 desk tops got through out the door in the front yard, no computer’s in this house , now just room mates
Why won’t he let you see his tests? To me, that’s erason enough.
Not ok its emotional cheating which leads to the next step
…when someone shows you what they are capable of…her
.believe it
He might not be cheating but he’s crossing some lines for sure. Better nip it in the bud now.
I don’t understand why these men are defending the guy.
Trust your gut. If its causing problems he should nip it and hasnt. That in itself says something
It takes two, so I’m quite certain it’s not all her fault.
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Take your kid and leave. You deserve much better.
Are you married to this guy?
I think you should always trust your gut feeling. I would probably react the same way.
He already disrespected you and betrayed you by talking to her after you stated you didn’t want that.
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Do what I did , every time he lied, I kept throwing his cellphone in the toilet, I don’t take any man’s shit
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“Wow”, Sounds like she’s coming to wreck your relationship TOO! If you LOVE 
him and have a child with him? Then fight to keep him.
I would do a surprise visit his work just to see who she is?
But let him know is she going to continue to become a wedge between us? Because I would like an honest answer? Let that sink in for a while.
I think he’s a Good Guy. If not he would have been gone?
I say fight for him! Because if you don’t another chick will challenge you again for the same B.S. I’m just saying! ( P.S. this happened to my parents, my mom fought for her man. Happily married for 45 yrs. Strong and 7 kids.)
You already know, now go! Let him ruin his life not yours
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That jerk is messing with your mind. He loves the fact that you are jealous. It’s turn-around time. STOP! Don’t read his email. Don’t look up when she drives by. Don’t act jealous. Don’t be interested. It will either fade away, or grow. If it fades away, you just might get happy again. If not, get rid of the problem.
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sounds like you’re not dumb. You know what’s going on and you know what you need to do.
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Leave right away.Dont hurt yourself much over someone not worth.no buts,no ifs,…just leave life is much better ahead.
You have to set her straight!
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He lied to you, he’s probably doing worse. Move on