Why is he coming with?
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Not sure if you can do that since money was saved during the marriage. The money from the sell of your house can be protected though.
I just got divorced in Texas and learned all kinds of things.
You may end up with a sexually transmitted debt.
My ex was the same, and my money ended up paying his debt by the courts.
I divorced him and started again with nothing.
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Divorce this scum bag
Check with your state laws, he may own half whether his name is on the home or not because you are married.
Idk how you got in that situation too begin with. Everything he spent his “extra” money on should be mutually agreed upon. If having toys and going out benefits the both of you. Do you go to the casino with him? Do you both go out on the boat and rides on the razor? I think there needs to be a balance of living in the moment and saving for the future. But if he is choosing things that only benefit him, then no. If you both enjoy these things then yes.
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It makes no difference whose name it is in. The Family Court says it is 50-50 if you separate and they don’t often take any notice of prenup’s. Spend your money.
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Your not selfish but you should not be with him. It’s not good for either of you. He is who he is and he’s not going to change and it sounds like your not happy with who he is. You deserve to be with someone who makes you happy
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Divorce him, then buy the house!
No mam! Not selfish at all.
Leave him in his house…and go to yours alone.
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I lived ten years and three kids, in the basement of our house with no inside plumbing. Then we built the upstairs and had three more kids. We have separate finances and my marriage is a good one. Would I do it again??? No I would not have married so young, got an education and a good paying job and built the house first. However it’s a beautiful home, on the river and I love it. To each his own.
Absolutely not selfish!! You bought the house, not him! But I’d keep finances legally separated so that you don’t end up paying for his irresponsible spending habits. If he is in debt or ends up in debt, it may fall on you as well. However, I’m not sure though since a prenup was involved. Just talk to a lawyer and be sure that y’all’s finances are not legally tied together, for now and in the future, to be safe.
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No just put your name on it
Not selfish at all and at least now u no what to expect of him. Protect ur self and ur children. And hope he grows up!
Ur doing a smart thing!!!
No very smart of you , proud you are thinking of your children do not put his name on it since he blowed all his money. Protect your children
Putt everything in his name🤣jk your an adult do what u want
Same condo complex just a 2/2 I have a 1/1 now and my partner lives with me now and we are not a couple anymore. And have not been foe 20 years, we just take care of each other,
Not at all. Men are big kids. I bought land a trailer & he has lived here for 6 years & has done nothing to keep it up nor saved money or spent any money on anything but gambling etc. my home is know rotten away. Have so much anger bc of it. People will use you. I found out the hard way. Always look out for you bc no one else will!!!
Absolutely not. Why are you still with the selfish no account jerk?
My grandmother 80 yrs old divorced her husband so he would get nothing she worked so hard for for years alone. They still date but live separate and are not entitled to each other’s things. And let me tell you my grandmother is the smartest woman I know! 
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Even if you don’t put it in his name…it goes to him when you die…and he can do what he wants with it after that…meaning not give it to your kids…it was acquired after marriage…pre nup or not…best bet is to put it in your kids name if you trust them.
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Crazy if you think he doesnt own half anything bought from the day you married becomes an asset and will be divided if divorced if i were you id divorce him first
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No your not selfish, fo whst you have to fo for you, chances are if you pass ir divorce, your kids might get nothing, cause he’s not gonna take care if his own house, he is hell not gonna take care of yours
Nope good luck to you ! 
Nope! Have you kids added to the tittle.
Not at all, you and your children come first. If he wants a nest egg he can save for it xx
No….nothing wrong with that, but put the new house in your kids names.
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I would keep everything seperate. Even with a prenup or will in place I would consult an attorney. In some states a new purchase of a home especially a joint residence would be exempt. He could be entitled to at least half in case of your death or a divorce. Cover all bases. It is better to be safe than sorry. You would be wise to protect yourself and your wishes on your property, investments, accounts, etc…
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No. I made that tough decision at one point in my first marriage. I put the house in my name only- I paid him his equity at divorce. The house has ended up being my saving grace. I always knew I could make the payment on my own. Me and my son are okay - my ex has abandoned us and we have a place to live that I can afford- always.
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You had better divorce first or he is entitled to it it becomes marital assets once you are married.
when john and i bought this place the woman husband had passed away before we got it paid off she married another man he had never lived here but when she sign the deed her new husband had sign it to
Not at all… You worked for it… It’s yours
NO
But get the house in your kids name.
It was his own choice to not have the house in his name when he was spending money on other things!
Let him out in the COLD
No it is not selfish.
I think in other terns. No you are not selfish but in the state of Washington there is a community property clause that if one passes it all goes to the other spouse. Get a divorce and you would be much happier. Wishing you luck.
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No not at all!!! You have to work together in order for it to be a marriage. You have to protect yourself man or woman. Talk to a lawyer and see if you can get free advice
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Not selfish at all. Common sense to me. If he doesn’t take care of what he has now what would make you think he would take care of anything in the future? You are wise to put only your name on the house.
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Why not, sounds like you knew who he was when you married him. Good luck with your life.
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I’m curious as to who pays the bills. I can tell you from experience that separating finances doesn’t work. If you’re already having this issue, it isn’t going to work in the long run. Besides that, already thinking of ways to protect yourself and having to have a prenup, move on, this isn’t the relationship for you. It did be a partnership in which you geek you can completely trust your partner.
My father put his house in all of his 6 children’s names. We are selling it and those of us who are married had tonhave our spouses sign a Real Estate POA or they would alsonhave to sign the closing papers. Talk to an attorney because even if you dont put his name on your house, he might have a claim to it.
separate property…remember this if you put his name on yout home it is no longer separate property….be wise! Cant go back
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Not at all, I made the mistake of putting my husband’s name on my house and paid it off working my rear off to get it paid in 30 years which I did. He was busy with other women and friends buying them drinks with money I was making. Then he passed away and he had children from other women in our ( my) 20 year marriage. They were trying to get what I alone had paid for. Don’t dare put his name on your house!
I would speak to lawyer and find out your rights in this situation. Being selfish isn’t the important question here. It’s obvious you never 100% trusted your future with this man and you can see his character for he has not kept his end or the bargain about saving. So your next question is do you want to continue life with this man knowing you are buying the house mostly with your money. Because if you don’t want to continue with him you could end up losing what you buy or at least half of it to him. All I can say is talk to a lawyer I don’t mean a divorce lawyer I mean one who can advise you on your purchase and property rights. Best wishes sweetheart you deserve the best in life.
Make sure the legalities in the event someting should happen to you. He could end up owning what YOU worked hard for instead of your family.
No ma’am he didn’t pull his weight and didn’t do nothin to his own house, no I don’t think your selfish at all!
Sounds to me…that you should not have married in the first place…marriage is a partnership as well as a commitment to love an
No, not selfish at all. Very practical and considerate actually. It’s a way to hp take care of and protect your kids. If (heaven forbid) something happens to you, he is an adult who can step up. What’s more, he hasn’t put anything into earning the house or even taking care of his current one. Just because you’re married doesn’t always mean you have to do everything together.
That being said, check your state's laws regarding marital property. Here in VA, anything purchased post marriage officiation is automatically joint property regardless of whether both names are on the loan or not when it comes to divorce or death.
Smart and common sense thing to do. I didn’t do that. Nobody advised or looked after my financial welfare. 5 yrs later I regret all that. Too late now, gotta move on anyhow.
Any regrets with your choice for a husband? By all means put the house in your name only, to do otherwise would only enable his laziness and self centerness.
Sounds like he is not responsible with money. Hopefully he is great in other ways!
The sad thing is you knew how he was … How he treated his house . and you still went on to stay with him to get your new place …maybe you should pay back rent … Just saying … Is your name on his things… He the boat or othe house you lived in so you could rent out yours and then sell it ? Just asking … Many things to think about … Just saying …
Not knowing their age… keep your children’s best interest at heart. I’ve been married to my second husband for 30 plus years. But I still made extra provisions for my daughter from my first marriage. What the husband says he will do, while I’m still alive may not be what he’ll do if I’m gone…
Sounds like you are planning for YOUR future and your kids. Not selfish.
Consult a real estate and or an estate lawyer. They are totally different. DO NOT rely on advise from the internet. There are ways to safeguard your personal property.
Not at all. Do what is right for you and your children. He can keep his boats and gambling winnings for his.
You are wise to protect yourself and your children from your husband.
Use some if the money for a good divorce lawyer! Then go buy your own house. But, if you do stay married, and but another house, make sure before buying to check the natural property laws in your state. I’d have a lawyer look into that. Also, I know you said that you have a prenup, but I’d make sure it didn’t leave out property. Have your lawyer look at that too .
Absolutely NOT. but sounds like he will never change after! Good luck do you boo boo
No. That behavior is usually there to stay: Selfish, irresponsible and his only goals are to fulfill his selfish desires. Dont let him change your mind regarding children as beneficiaries.
I’d be extremely cautious in this if it were me.
Honestly… better recheck that prenup… and before purchasing, definitely talk to a lawyer to get actual legal advice on how to be able to do what you are requesting, in the unfortunate event if you were to pass before your husband. Unfortunately, internet advise on legal matters, is just mostly opinions or people with previous experiences they’ve had. But, only one sure way to know what your options are… legally?.. is an actual lawyer that handles this type of situations. Bcs you will eventually have to have one to make whatever options available thst you choose, is documented by an attorney to make it legal and binding.
You’re already planning ahead for a divorce and you’re only 4 years in. Get the divorce and go buy your house 
This isn’t the way a functioning marriage works. 
Put your kids name and yours on it if he doesn’t like that idea file for divorce, before you buy.
Tell him to save up for a rental house you can both put your name on that if he shares in money and work!
No, you are not selfish he was being selfish and only thinking of himself for 4 years.
Hell no if he is that selfish and not putting money into the new house do not put his name on it period
You Seem Smart enough. If You Stay with the Sap you are Hindering Yourself. If You Got Sick & was down for. The Count Fr. Awhile & on Any Medication ,He Could Put Papers in Front of You ,being Sick & have You Sign Over " your Home" to Him so Fast. Your Children Wouldn’t Be Able to Fight It. & They MAY Never Be the Wiser since He May Not Let them in to even see You. He Could Also Give You Mild Drugs. Not to Kill You …but To " Cloud Your Mind & slow your Heart Rate Down & you Could Die. He Already Uses His Money to Buy His Wants. Bc. He Knows Your Paying Fr. All the Necessities with your Money. If Your Not Even Married to Him his Relatives Could end up with the Bulk of Both of Your Dough. Go House Hunting On Your Own. Buy Something you Can take care of as YOU get Older in Yrs. Don’t Tell Him Anything About it. He is Only Thinking Of You as an " Xtra Pay Check that He Doesn’t have to Work For. Forget Him. He Has Had Long Enough to Fulfill His Obligation of Moving Forward. You HAVE TRAPPED YOURSELF !!! Get A Home Of Your Own, hey the Hell Out of His & don’t Give Him Your New Address. Talk to a Lawyer ,draw up a Will. & Leave your Kids Some Money. Leave An Organization That Helps Poor Children the Rest of it. Hopefully, You Will Meet A Man that is Much Better that What you Have Known. Don’t Ever Tell Anyone About Any Money you Have Ever.
No !!! Not at all but I would talk to a lawyer 1st bc u can not write off a spouse. Keep ur house in ur own name so u can leave it to ur kids once u co mingle
Ur money with him it be comes his money too I’ve been there talk to a lawyer !!!
No, it sounds as though he’s fine with his house leave him to live there and you enjoy your new home.
Smart move… keep it separate, If possible. Some states look at it as community property anyways if married.
Unless prevented by the prenup, buy a new house in your own name. He didn’t save as promised!
Why are you still married? If yours is yours and his is his…that sounds like my life…SINGLE.I understand your dilemma…just wondering did you know this about him before you married him and know that wasn’t acceptable to you.
So many issues here other than whose name is on the home…it’s not wrong , but if you lord it over him constantly that it’s YOUR house and not his, you only allow him to live there, etc. it’s going to tear that rift between you even bigger… property laws vary by state and your spouse generally inherits the home especially if they’re living in it. Sounds as if you need a divorce lawyer too .and to all of you who say since he didn’t contribute to kick him out …put the shoe on the other foot…if it was a stay at home wife who never worked or contributed monetarily but spent money on shoes and handbags, clothes etc while hubby footed the bill… you wouldn’t say the same thing.
Absolutely not. Just make sure you have nothing you don’t want him to have, has his name on the sale.
Nope! Gotta look out for your self. Not freeloaders.
Please look out for yourself. Sounds to me like you need some REAL security that currently you don’t have.
He needs to sell his house, pay you his interest in the house you buy then his name should be on it. He must contribute in some way or it is all yours.
Absolutely not! Just be prepared to handle any repairs.
Unfortunately you picked a selfish one.
It’s time for a divorce before moving in the new house.
Depends entirely on the prenup. You need a good Lawyer Asap. You need to get out of that mess, somehow, safely. He obviously doesn’t really care anymore, You stayed in it too long, He’s probably already raised gambling cash on it……he has a serious problem and you seem to be ignoring it, an enabler. You, Selfish? You might be but obviously not when it comes to keeping a roof over your own head. If you don’t get selfish soon you haven’t grown up you have just grown older and more confused. Brutal? Someone needs to tell you. He ? Is a man not a child. He will find his own way.
Get a lawyer to figure it out. He might get a credit for you living in his decrepit house.
Hell to the NO!
Exactly what are the redeeming qualities here? 
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You are very responsible to think of you and family, he has not wasting gambling and such
Someone once said “Common sense has went”. Not sure who said that. He /she wasn’t wrong. 
If he has no children it should go to yours but again check the law in your state
If your husband spends his money on himself his selfish you need a home to live in but its not a good start to a marriage i shared everything with my love
why are you still married to him?
I was raised hearing the saying: “If You Don’t Work, You Don’t Eat!” Heard it frequently. The animals hard to be fed first (lived on a farm) and the chores (we had both household chores and farm chores) had to he completed. And you also ate what was put in front of you. Just because your chores paid for you to have dinner didn’t mean you got to pick your dinner.
And it seems to me that this rule applies here too!
He had the choice to save for the house and choice to splurge on a boat. He had the choice to save towards the house but splurged on boys nights out. And so on and so forth. He’s not only failed to do what he had to to earn a space for his name on the deed, but now he’s also going to try and demand that space? Life doesn’t work like that.
And there’s no mention of what is going to become of his house. If he is going to rent it or sell it. And regardless, if he rents or sells it is it going to be as is or after he sinks a mess-load of money into it? If it’s as is he’s going to have to take a drastic cut in the rent he could get or in the sale price. And yet if he fixes it up he’s going to be out a large chunk of change up front, of course he’ll get it back in the end but does he have the ability to do that without your support financing the project? Or is he going to have to have you finance it and then fight you on paying you your investment back?
The best thing to do is remove all emotion from this equation. He’s your husband, you love him, and you want to be the respectful wife and blah blah blah. Remove the emotion, and look at this as a financial matter only. You’re setting up a company for your children to be taken care of after you’re gone. Your company is your home: you’re the C.E.O. and right now you have the means in place that they’ll be taken care of with the first business you started (your home that you had to sell) being covered by the prenuptial (smart move by the way - all couples should do that) now the protections of the prenuptial are in a vulnerable state (unless you’ve written future protections into it for the house you’re buying) and that prenuptial being vulnerable means your children’s future is vulnerable and it also means whereas you’re looking to do the right thing by both your children and your husband, you have stability and cash-cow written all over you wish is why you must remove the emotion from the equation and look at this as a C.E.O. of a business. Quite frankly he hasn’t proven he can even manage running the business, and you’re contemplating making him partner?
Not a good business deal, period.
Not a good relationship deal, if he can walk on you rather than work with you what will be the next thing he walks on you for?
And lastly, you’re a Mom first and foremost. He can either accept that, and work with you to protect the children; and if he doesn’t then true colors you never knew existed may come to be revealed.
Life doesn’t work the way he’s wanting to achieve things without working for them!
Accept NO money from him in the down payment or in paying the mortgage, the insurance, the property taxes, or for any maintenance and repairs. Make this solely your investment, and keep the protections you have set in place for your children secure. Also contact a lawyer and see how the selling of your previous home and the purchasing of the new is impacted by the prenuptial agreement and also complete a will (I’d recommend a living will but talk it over with your lawyer) and a trust that the house would go into for your children.
Have ur kids names on the deed also, so at your passing, it’s automatically theirs.
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Do NOT put his name on it… follow your gut. It is not self, it is smart.
Not selfish at all in my opinion.
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Why are you staying?
I assume he’s called you selfish… else why the need for this post? Get a divorce 
Dont put his name on anything he is a spend thrift
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Not selfish at all. I think I would divorce him!
Protect yourself and get advice from a lawyer